


Shadows and Lights

by thesinbin



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: F/M, Romance, Slice of Life, Sports
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-03-06
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-01-14 18:50:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 42
Words: 129,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1277056
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thesinbin/pseuds/thesinbin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alex Heights got more than she bargained for when she agreed to study abroad at Teiko. Time finds her attending high school, splitting with close friends, and under the unyielding command of a terrifying Akashi Seijuurou. Alex wants a normal life with her friends. Unfortunately, everyone knows that when the Generation of Miracles are involved, normal doesn't exist.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

The first time I "accidentally" met _them_ was during a sport festival at school. Teiko middle school had a most unfortunate mantra, "winning is everything." I wasn't approving of ideology like that. I prefer to play for my team, protecting them in any way I can. It definitely didn't help that I was at Teiko on scholarship, having been uprooted from the United States in an effort to better the school's slightly-above-average softball team. I'd had barely enough Japanese rattling about my memory to make it through the average school day. Anything beyond school and softball was generally lost to me.   

That game, that tournament, was really a long string of obstacles. The inexperienced players were being obnoxious, chattering away about boys and dates. The heat was sweltering, and the catching gear certainly wasn't helping. My pitcher's self esteem had dropped drastically in the last two innings, and I couldn't stop noticing every little thing. The last thing was a constant problem for me. I see everything, and while I can easily control it, I knew that tonight I'd be much more tired than usual. Sweat has started plastering my hair to my neck and face, and the umpire had allowed me time to dunk my head in some ice-water and drench the rest of me. The cold felt like magic against my skin. Thank god I have more clothes on under my uniform. My temper is wearing thin.   

"Oi!" I yell, glaring at the benched players. "Get more water for your fielders if you don't have anything better to talk about than boys!" The girls scuttle away, watching me. My eyes turn to the pitcher, a shy girl called Mizuki, and I give her a nod. "Two more. Give me two more and I can end this inning for you." There are two reasons I'm here, and why I'm more specifically a catcher. The first is that I observe too much, and I can remember it with relative ease. The second is that I can manipulate our opponents. _Runner on three and one. Fake a throw to two, have Mizuki cut it off and toss it back to me._ I give the infield the sign for our play, tapping my wrist once and my chest twice.   

Mizuki's arm won't last another inning. Her pitches have slowed, and I nod to our second baseman, who seems to have caught my drift. I throw my fake, anticipating the runner crashing toward me at breakneck speed. The throw back to me is sloppy, and my eyes widen as I realize I'm in a bad position to catch it. I snatch it out of the air as fast as possible, drop my vulnerable leg to the ground, and slam myself into the runner. We both crash to the floor in a tangle of limbs. "Out!" _That's three!_

The runner gets up faster than I do, stomping hard on my throwing hand. My fingers curl into the dirt, spasming slightly as I pull it back. _I hate metal cleats so much._ I toss the ball back to Mizuki as she nears me. With a shuddering sigh, I spring up and wince as my ankle protests slightly. A wilder pitcher replaces Mizuki the next inning. In that time, I manage to corner the opposing team at the cost of an ankle and a knee. My shoulder is the price I need to pay for the next play.   

The bunt is perfectly placed, nearly out of reach. It rolls my way, and with all the speed and strength I can gather, I turn to meet the runner sliding into home. One of her legs is far too high for a normal slide. In fact, it crashes closer to my ribs than my shoulder, making me grunt in pain as I slam her leg down with the ball in my glove. She lets out a yelp as her ankle gives way, and I shudder as steel cleats rake down my side. It's always like this. Injuries every game, outs whenever the chance comes my way. I'm here to make this team win, not to play nice. "Out!"   

"Hai-chan!" My last name's been shortened significantly. Heights became Hai in an effort to ease pronunciation. Our third baseman, Kagome, leans over me as I allow the runner freedom to get back to her dugout. "You're going to get yourself killed!" I stand, dusting myself off and wincing as I stretch my arms. My mask is somewhere near the back of the backstop.   

"I'm here to get you victories." I hiss, stretching my torso and wincing at the familiar pain of being cleated. "This is what it takes." With the ball tossed to our pitcher and Kagome running back to her position, I jog to find my mask. I adjust my ponytail and shove strands of long, dark hair out of my face, disgusted as I find them slick with sweat. The mask comes on as soon as it's emptied of dust, and I make awkward eye contact with heterochromatic eyes. The redhead gives me a strangely approving nod, and I turn my attention back to the game. We win 14-1 

Before coming here, I'd never been on a team where it was mandatory for the team to clean up the field after a game. It wasn't common at home. I kind of like it, though. It helps me memorize the strange slopes and bumps of the field.   I wasn't expecting the same set of eyes to find me after the game as I adjust my dripping uniform and tug on my various braces. _Knee, then ankle. Shoulder, then wrist._ The taping around my catching wrist is undone since it's no longer necessary. "Why did you do that?" My eyes dart to the dark shoes and then to the unusually short redhead.   

"Who are you?" I ask in return, trying to rid myself of the knots in my neck. I pack my gear carefully and slip them into my softball bag.   

"Akashi Seijuro." Gold and red burning holes in me. "Why would you do that?"   

"Do what?" I reply, dragging the bag out of the dugout and finding my old backpack. It still smells like home.  

 "You didn't need to sustain so many injuries. Why would you do so?" I look the strange boy in the eye.   

"I'm here to bring victories to this team. I'm not here to play nice. Besides, it would've happened to someone else if not to me. At least I have some sort of protection." Akashi narrows his eyes. "I knew the risks of doing this before I did it. It's fine. Besides, I'm just a _foreigner._ It's okay for the outsider to get hurt."   

"Hai-san! I got the ice you wanted! Do y-you need wrap?" I look at Mizuki.   

"I have some wrap. Thanks for the ice. You did well today." Mizuki turns a thousand shakes of red, blubbers something about needing to do something, and darts around the dugout. "Oi! Mizuki, I can't reach behind me if I'm holding ice!"   

The redhead takes the ice from me and presses it to my side as if he could read my movements. I narrow my eyes and wrap the ice to my side as best I can. "Thanks. Anyway, I gotta go. Ja ne." Picking up my bag, I walk past him, nodding to the slightly smaller boy beside him.   

The next time I ran into them was a few weeks later. This time the strange duo had a group of rainbow-haired boys with them, one of whom looked like some sort of terrifying giant. That game we won 20-4, and I dislocated my shoulder. It was really unfortunate timing, too.  

The ball had just made it into my glove, and a certain well-placed cleat just barely managed to reach my shoulder under my gear. They were called safe, and my shoulder popped out of place. I can still remember the pain, the scream that had dripped like blood from my lips as I grabbed it. I couldn't understand anyone as I held my arm to my side, shuddering in pain.   

It took me a few minutes to pull myself together, to stop the ringing of my ears and the ragged breathing that persisted in showing my weakness. I was taken out for the rest of the inning while my shoulder was popped back in and iced. Three runs were scored. Our catcher came teetering back to the dugout after the third one. There was no way she'd make it, and we both knew it.   

On came the gear, the mask, my glove. Off came the ice, the tape, the jacket. I winced my way to the plate and tugged my mask off just long enough to do what I do best.  "Don't think you can relax just because we're up!" I shout, drawing the infielders to the circle. "And don't think you can relax because I'm catching. Get in a line. We're testing out my arm." It takes me a few precious minutes to ease my arm into throwing. First to Mizuki, then Kogame. To our second baseman, our first baseman. Haruna, our centerfielder, gives me a wave. I nod.   

Out rockets the ball from my hand, searing past second and out to Haruna, who has to take a few steps in. _My arm is not okay._ It doesn't go unnoticed. Haruna to Kogame to me. Me to Mizuki. Mizuki barely manages a smile. "You better play harder than you did before." I warn my team, my eyes narrow. "I'm not going to save you." The innings pass with the usual beating from runners against my legs and torso. We manage well enough.   

It's after the game that was a problem.   With my gear packed, the field raked and watered, and everyone sent home, I rifle through my backpack, searching for yet another brace to place over my clothing. My body feels stiff and sore, like I haven't moved for days. The ice on my shoulder is leaking and wetting my shirt. "Kurokocchi, you're so mean~!" _I thought everyone went home..._

I slip out of the dugout, toss my softball bag to the side, and return for my backpack. A zipping sound reaches my ears from outside. "If you're touching what is mine, you'll make me angry." I call, emerging with my backpack slung over my good shoulder. The redhead from before, Akashi, is holding my heaviest bat. "You shouldn't touch other people's belongings."   

"You did it again today." My eyes narrow at the sound of his voice, low and haughty. I laugh humorlessly.   

"Of course I did." I say, taking the bat back and replacing it. "I do it everyday. Every game. Every time." Is it just me, or is my bag heavier than usual? I begin to drag it toward the exit of the school, wishing my teammates had stayed behind. It doesn't matter though. The foreigner is always the outsider. I nearly run into a purple giant, stopping a mere centimeter before him. Confused, I look up at him. "How did I not see you?" I go around, wishing I could drive.   

"Was there something you wanted?" I ask, turning to face Akashi. "You're with basketball. There's no reason for you to come watch a sport like this."   "

"You have something I want." He says bluntly. I narrowly avoid glaring at him.   

"That so?" I stop walking. "Sorry. Can't help anyone I'm not playing for. Don't have any skills other than taking a beating." With that, a strange, quirky smirk cuts across the smaller boy's face. "Besides, my Japanese is pretty terrible. I probably couldn't help you even if I wanted to."   

"You project presence." I blink.   

"Excuse me?" I laugh slightly, moving to get away.   

"You project and reduce your presence. The reason you get run into so often is because you reduce your presence while getting into position, and then radiate it once your opponent can't turn back. That's why you're constantly getting hurt." Red and gold, staring at me intensely.   

"That's probably only part of it." I say flatly. "The point of my position is to make everyone else look good and keep them playing. I have to do that by calling the game in my team's favor and manipulating everyone else. It has nothing to do with presence. I just have to manipulate how everyone moves." Then I _do_ walk away, or I try to. _Snip, snip, snip._ I turn in time to see strange strands of dark hair falling to the ground. Not much, but at least a lock or two.   

"I'm not wrong." I look at the redhead evenly. While he radiates this intensity, it doesn't really bother me like it probably should.   

"You aren't wrong, and you aren't right. It may be true for a sport like yours, but it isn't for ones like mine." I adjust my backpack. "I need to go-"  

"Hai-san!" I nearly jump at the voice behind me. Our coach -my coach- looks at me flatly. "What are you still doing here? I told you to get home! You have a duty to your team to be able to play! Staying out won't help you." My lip curls in distaste.  

"Yeah, yeah, I'm going." I say with equal disinterest. "I just lost something and decided to have a nice little chat with some classmates. Sorry."   

"Just remember you're here to play for me." _I hate you_. "You don't have another purpose here. Anything that will distract you should be left at home."   

"What are you, my mother?" I reply, adjusting my grip on the strap of my backpack. "I know all that already. Just go home."   

"Look, you have a du-"  

"A duty to my team to ensure victory. I don't have another reason for attending a school like this, or even being in this country. Remember, I'm a _foreigner,_ an _outsider_. As soon as I can't play, I'm worthless." The coach seems stunned at my recitation of his words. "I know all that. You've told me many times. Go home. I'll do your job for you."   

Teiko wasn't the school of my choice, but it was certainly better than staying at home. Our team was unusually successful for the remainder of the season. I'd occasionally find things that weren't mine in my bag, but nobody claimed them. I was the only person who'd need them, anyway.   

"Kogame, did you leave this in my bag?" I didn't know the word for 'brace' at the time. Kogame, and the rest of my team, denied having seen the thing before. They were pretty nice, too. Comfortable and more supportive than the ones I'd brought from home.   

"Why do you injure yourself?" I look up at a blue-haired boy, small in stature.   

“You... were with Akashi-san?" I'm answered with a nod.  

 "My name is Kuroko Tetsuya." I nod.  

"You can call me 'Hai'." I respond. The brace on my knee didn't help the throbbing I felt.   

"Why?" I look up Kuroko, and he points to my whole self. I frown.  

"To get outs. So they can win." I stare at the shapes of my teammates heading home, calling to one another, always ignoring me if I'm not catching. "It's my job."   

"Do you like softball?" I stare at him in surprise.  

"Do I like it?" He nods, blue eyes blank but curious. I frown. "I don't know anymore. I should like it. I'm supposed to... but what's the fun in a game where you're nothing but a pawn? It's no fun playing a game you aren't competing in." Kuroko's eyes are as calm as I've ever seen them, although they've widened with what seems to be surprise.   

"I wish we'd lose."   We did, at some point near the end of the season, run into a team that pushed us. That pushed _me_.   

Bottom of the fifth, we're barely three runs ahead, and I'm sweating bullets. They've got a foul character on their team, a catcher who just loves to cleat her competition, and likes to convince her friends to do so too. My leg is bleeding. My hands and chest are bruised. Each time a runner comes around I unwillingly sustain another injury. The final straw came when she, this catcher, this monster, kicked her cleat under my gear and straight into the unprotected expanse of my stomach.   

I was lucky for two reasons. One, the girl was called out and ejected from the game, and two, I didn't die. Well, not quite. I roll to the side, my chest heaving and my body curled into a ball. "Hai-chan! Hai, can you hear me?" Mizuki and Kogame kneel next to me, eyes wide as I push myself onto my hands and knees. Iron fills my mouth and dribbles past my lips like a small stream.   

"You have to sit out." My eyes widen instantly. My mask is removed to examine my head and my stomach is checked for bleeding. I shake my head rigorously.   

"I can't." And it's the truth. This team can't afford for me to sit out. Not now. The cleating continues for the rest of the inning.   

Two outs, and we're barely maintaining our lead. Out of nowhere comes a bat, thrown roughly from "careless" hands as I dive for a ball. It cracks against the back of my head, and I see stars.   

"Sit out, Hai!" Kogame cries, helping me up. "You'll get killed for real next time." My coach glances at me, beckoning me to the dugout. I firmly shake my head and pick up the catcher's mask.   

"Hai-san, come sit out. I'll let it pass this once." He says, eyes narrowed with irritation. Again, my head shakes now.   

"Take me out now," I say, "after all the hits I've already taken, and I won't forgive you! You brought me here, so use me. Are you doubting my abilities?" I feel cold and in control, supreme and superior. "Replace me, and I guarantee that you will lose. I'm the only obstacle in this team's path. They won't get by me."   

They don't. One out and a split lip later, we still manage to win, 11-9. The only reason we keep our lead is because I force the players to play directly where the ball will be hit according to their position. "Do you like softball?" I laugh at Kuroko's question when he asks me again afterward.   

"I wish I didn't."


	2. Chapter 2

My body slides down the side of the dugout hours after out last game, tired and bruised, and refusing to budge. I want to walk home. I want to crawl home. Hell, I want to roll my way home, but I can't. My legs are too tired to support my weight. "You should quit." The voice sounds faint and tinny to my ears, so I pay it no mind. I barely manage to pull my gear together. "You should use your teammates. Not have them use you."   

Laughter bubbles past my lips, tired and sad and altogether too confused to sound completely sane. The walls feel like they're tilting. " _Quit?_ " I speak in English instead of Japanese, grinning tiredly. " _I refuse. How annoying_."

"Oi, Akashicchi, I didn't understand that!" What annoying people, chattering away like I don't exist.   

"Be quiet, Kise-kun."   

"You should study more, nanodayo." I growl slightly.  

"Shut _up_." I hiss, glaring in the direction of voices I can't seem to see clearly. " _You're giving me a headache."_   

"Seriously, Akashicchi! Midorimacchi do you understand?"   

"Some of it, nanodayo."   

" _What are you afraid of?"_ The near-perfect question makes me freeze. " _Losing? Your coach? Teammates?"_

This time I speak in Japanese, an attempt to end the thoughts that are beginning to bubble forward. "Don't ask me things like that." I narrow my eyes and wish I could disappear.   

" _I can help you. You'll fail on your own. How much do you think you can take?"_ My anger boils over as I stand chest to chest with Akashi.   

"Don't think you can tell me what to do." I say, my voice unusually low and angry. "I can do this any way I want. If I can go one game, I can go a million. You're just like everybody else." A pair of scissors nearly slices my cheek as I dodge. "Violence is disgusting. Stay away from me."   

What I can't explain, and trust me, I've tried to many times, is how I somehow managed to find myself attending one of the basketball team's practices. There was this little walkway above the court itself, and I stayed hidden there. My experience went something like this.   

Curses flow from my lips, but I keep it in English, unwilling to describe my displeasure in a way that the redhead could easily understand. I peek over the railing, leaning casually as the sound of squeaky sneakers and bouncing balls fills my ears. I don't understand basketball, I really don't. I know you shoot the ball through the hoops, but that's about it. I sigh with irritation. "Can I help you?" _Ah, this must be the coach._ I shake my head.   

"Akashi-san somehow managed to make me watch." I say tiredly. "So I am." The coach reigns in a slight smile.   

"I see." The coach smiles quietly at me. "Are you the foreign student?"   

I bristle unhappily. "Yes."  

"I didn't mean it that way." He assures me, smiling pleasantly. "I understand why Akashi-kun had you come. Tell me, what do you see?"   

I turn my gaze to the floor below, trying not to notice every little thing that jumps out at me. "They aren't quite a team. They work together, but they're all acting as individuals. Well, with the exception of Kuroko-san." I'm asked to elaborate, so in my simple, slightly childish Japanese, I do so.   

"The one with green hair plays like he's solving a math problem. There's no passion. The one with yellow hair almost has too much, and doesn't seem to concentrate well.   

"Purple is bored, dispassionate. Is he eating? _Wow._ That takes some skill. I'm _impressed_." The coach laughs slightly. "The one with dark blue hair... does he hate basketball? There's no will to play. He's just going through the motions. Kuroko is the opposite. He doesn't have the skills the others do, but he has a lot of heart and he seems like he's still growing.   

"Akashi... is that Akashi? He seems to use his teammates, but it looks like he really cares about them, too." I frown. "It's like he's torn."   

"What's your name?" The coach asks. I shrug slightly.   

"Everyone calls me Hai, so I guess you can call me that as well." I reply.   

"What's your actual name?" I have to think for a while to recall how the Japanese say their names in introductions.   

"Heights, Alex. Pleased to meet you."   The coach tries repeating my name, making it sound like _Arex Haitsu_. It's pretty funny. "If it's more convenient, please call me Hai. I don't mind." We watch the boys play a while longer.   

"Do you think I can leave yet? I don't understand this game much." Akashi seems to sense my thoughts and pins me with a steady stare. I hold his gaze, refusing to look away until he does. "I guess not. Don't want to make him mad, yet." The coach laughs.   

"Would you like me to explain basketball for you, Hai-san?" My face reddens slightly, but I nod. It takes the coach a while to explain it to me. My Japanese hasn't stretched to other sports yet, so I have to ask many questions about names, meanings, and situations. Eventually, I get the gist of it.   

I end up staying at Teiko's practice for its entire duration. I don't entirely understand the purpose of me being here, but it's okay. I grab my backpack and get ready to leave. "Akashicchi, wasn't she talking to our coach?" The blond boy speaks a little too loud, and I'm a little too close.   

"I _can_ hear you." I call back to him. I exit the gym in silence. Unfortunately, my lovely silence doesn't last as long as I would've hoped. I'm almost off school grounds when a voice I was hoping to not hear calls out to me.  

"Hai, why weren't you at practice?" I glance at my coach and almost feel guilty.   

"Sorry." I say flatly. "I was asked to observe the basketball team." It takes me ten minutes and quite a bit of shouting for him to realize I'm not lying.   

"So other teams come before your own?"   

"It was a one-time deal, Coach! I'm not doing it again!" Another ten minutes of anger and screaming and lectures. I remain silent, accepting my punishment.   

"I believe that's enough." Cool, calm, and always intrusive is the voice of Akashi Seijuro. "Don't you agree, Coach?"   

My coach barely withholds his temper. "Butt out, kid. I'm talking to my catcher here." My hands shake. I've never been good at being yelled at. It used to make me cry on the spot, but I've gotten much better at delaying that reaction for when I get home.   

"I'm sorry." I say quietly, trying to keep my voice in check. "It won't happen again."   

"Make sure it doesn't." He says angrily. "Honestly, if I knew you'd be this much trouble..." I walk away as evenly as I can, wishing I was somebody else. I'm almost home when I realize that it's raining. I'm nearly soaked, chills running down my spine. My hair drips lazily.  

"What are you doing in the rain-ssu?" I start at the sudden question, my eyes widening as I take note of the familiar blond behind me. "I'm Kise by the way. Kise Ryouta." Kise, huh? The same boy my classmates squeal over.   

"Hai." I reply shortly, nodding to him. I continue walking home.   

"You'll get sick-ssu."   

"Is that so?" My voice wavers unpleasantly making me sound weak.   

"Did you get in trouble with your coach?" It takes me a few moments to register the question, and another few to realize Kise is willingly sharing an umbrella with me. I manage to nod slightly in response. "Akashicchi will sort it out since he told you to show up. Don't worry about it-ssu." I wish I could take those words to heart, but I cannot.   

"I can fix it myself." I reply quietly. "It's done already. I just have to go to practice and pretend I never left." I look at the blond with a slight frown. "Thanks for walking with me. I'll be going now." I push my way through the gates to my building and spend twenty minutes climbing the stairs.   

The next day practice is cancelled for the team, and since I apparently have nothing better to do (It's not like I could be doing _homework_ or practicing my swing, huh?) I'm dragged to yet another basketball practice, this time by Kise. I watch from the second level again.   

"Back again, Hai-san? I heard your coach was upset yesterday." I greet the coach.   

"Ah, yes. He was rather angry, but I understand why." I reply coolly. "We're off for the rest of the semester anyway, with the exception of one more game."   

The coach gives me an appraising glance. "Do you like your coach?"   

"Am I required to?" I reply, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not here for coaching. I'm here to play." The coach smiles sadly.   

"I see." We spend the rest of the basketball team's practice in silence. For almost a week after that day I didn't come to the basketball team's practices. I was gone for six days, and in that time, one of the so-called Miracles picked up my number. I _promise_ I didn't give it to them! In all the school, only two people had my number, Mizuki and Kogame. Kise or Akashi must've squeezed it out of them.   

My phone rang early on the seventh morning. "Hello?" I answer, unfamiliar with the number that pops up on the display. "Who is this?"  

"Come to practice today." I frown. Who _is_ that?  

"Who is this?" I repeat, beginning to feel anxious.   

"Come to practice and I'll tell you." All throughout the school day I wondered whether to show up at practice. I didn't pay attention to the lessons much, but I've already learned all of this.   

"Are you coming today?" I nearly start at the sound of Kuroko's voice. Turning, I offer him a slight smile.   

"Ah, I'm not sure... it's not like I have anything to do with the basketball team... but I don't have any plans, either." I answer. Kuroko nods twice.   

"I see." Then he picks up his book, one I didn't recognize, and thumbs through it. I turn back in my seat. "I think you should come."   

"Excuse me?"  

"Come to practice." Kuroko's eyes look at me calmly. I frown, feeling indecisive. "I'll show you the way after class." He goes back to reading. Just like that, my fate is sealed. I walk with him when all my classes are over. I don't have the heart to tell him I don't really want to attend his basketball practice when he's even offered to escort me. I feel nervous as soon as I enter the gym. 

This isn't the gym these so-called Miracles usually play in. In fact, I've never seen this one before. Then again, I've only ever had a need to know where my classes and the softball field are. The lights seem a little brighter than usual, but maybe that's because I'm at the same level as the court itself, and not watching from above. My heart skips a few beats. "Are you sure?" I ask Kuroko, watching the ghost-like boy. "M-Maybe I should go practice with Mi-"

"I'm sure." Kuroko sounds subdued but confident, turning to face me casually. "You're just nervous."  _Why would I be nervous? I should just go home. I should just go practice. I should leave._

"I didn't think you'd be what would convince her to come." Akashi's sudden words startle me so thoroughly that I jump in fright. 

"Aominecchi you owe me!" 

"Like hell I do!" Kise and the dark-haired basketball player bicker among themselves. 

"Was it you who called me this morning?" Akashi shakes his head slightly, and I rub my temples. "Then maybe I should go. Who calls that early anyway?" 

"Heights, Alex. 163 centimeters, 63.5 kilograms, C-cup." My head whips about fast enough to give me whiplash. "Aggressive shortstop and an analytical catcher, plays almost every position. Plays a short game, but doesn't mind hitting for power.  _Fast_. Do you know where I got these?" Some pink-haired girl sways her way toward me, eyes calculating. I shake my head. 

"These are notes your scout passed on to your coach." My face reddens slightly. 

"Why would my coach be interested in the size of...?" The girl reddens then. 

"Oh, I suppose I just added that in." She replies sheepishly. "Anyway, Akashi-kun, I have the rest of the information you asked for." My hands curl slightly into fists. 

"What makes you think you're even supposed to  _have_ that information?" I hiss, my eyes narrowing. "That's supposed to be between me, the scout, and my coach." 

"I requested them." Akashi says, flipping through what I can only assume is the rest of my athletic profile. "I'll be brief. I want you to learn basketball." Silence drowns the gym as I stare at him in disbelief. 

"I..."

"Before you refuse, don't you think you could gain something?" The pinkette stares at me shamelessly. "Maybe get away from something?" My face flushes with anger. 

"No. I'm here for one reason, and I intend to fulfill the promise I made this school." She opens her mouth. "I'm not saying I dislike the idea or anything. I'm saying that I can't afford to be distracted. If I don't go here, I'm stranded. People are weary of foreigners... particularly ones that aren't necessarily here because they're fluent in Japanese." 

"This is a waste of time, nanodayo." The green-haired kid with glasses gives me an appraising glance. "She doesn't have any height. How can you expect her to even catch up to the third-string players?" Somewhere, deep in the back of my mind, something wants to snap. I hate being doubted. I hate being underestimated. My eyes narrow. 

"She has something I want." I turn my gaze to the calm Akashi who stands before me, heterochromatic eyes drilling holes into me. 

"If you want it so bad, take it." I mutter, rubbing my sore shoulders. "I doubt I'd miss it." 

"You have four options." Akashi says suddenly drawing little circles on a piece of paper. He draws an X to represent me. "The first two are risky, but the third is too obvious. Your goal is to get to here, but someone is blocking this area and someone before you." He draws a rectangle at one end of the paper, and another filled in one at the other end. "They want to get _here_. What do you do?" I frown for a moment. 

"Double up the obvious route with the risky one that's closest. Fake to the option closest, run past the person in front of me." I move my fingers across the paper to continue my train of thought. "Probably can't take this one on alone. Go with the third route, have them pass by. Distract the ones who are blocking." 

"Your opponent is now headed in your direction. You must block them. How do you do so?" I stare at the new drawing, a miniature me and a tall figure. 

"Hm..." My eyes narrow. "Taller. Stronger? I'm faster. Go where they go, step by step." I go through scenario after scenario, shooting down proposed ideas almost instantaneously. "No good. Fourth option won't work under pressure. Best to go with second, then first." I'm snapped out of my challenge as soon as I sense something aiming for my head. Out of reflex, I grab it.  

It's far too large to be a softball. It's also the wrong color. A bit heavy, but not unbearably so. "Why...?"  It's then that everything I've done in this gym adds up, and I pierce the redhead with a furious glare. "Don't think I'm going to. As soon as I stop dedicating all my time to softball, I have to move schools." 

"You have one more game left." Akashi says calmly. "If you win it, I'll take care of your summer for you, but you must do everything I tell you to. Lose, and your scholarship will-"

"My scholarship will kiss me goodbye." I say unhappily. "I know. I always do." My eyes narrow. "However, I can take care of my own summers, thank you." 

Akashi's smile seems unusually warm right now. "Trust me. You can play both. I'll settle everything for you."  _What've I gotten into?_


	3. Chapter Three

Ah, fate is cruel. Let's fast-forward to my last softball game of the season. Everything was going as planned. Well, not quite. Our second-string catcher had taken my place during the first two innings, allowing four runs in.   

My fists clench at the scoreboard. 2-4, Teiko. "You know what you have to do, right?" My coach gives me an icy stare as I walk to the plate, swinging my bat with one hand to stretch my wrists. "I want Kagome and Honda in before the inning ends." With a sigh, I nod. It takes four pitches, but I manage a solid triple. I don't score that inning. 4 all, three innings to go.   

"Hai, I expect you to win." I turn a deaf ear to my coach, utterly disinterested. What can I manipulate? Who can I move? I sort out my plan, moving my teammates accordingly. My predictions are accurate to within several centimeters.   

As usual, I receive the anticipated injuries. Well, all but one are anticipated. I adjust my gear cheerfully, tightening the necessary straps about my knees and calf before, out of nowhere, a bat slams into the side of my still unprotected ankle. My eyes widen, and I let out a yelp. Mizuki runs for my braces.   

Time is called, and while I strip my leg of cleats and socks, I examine the blossoming bruise. It'll hurt for a while, that's for sure. I can probably manage the rest of the game. Mizuki dumps the first aid supplies and my things before me while Kogame attempting to calm down her anxiety and Haruna attempts calming the angry fielders. 

 I wrap it as firmly as I dare before slipping on a soft brace and my athletic support. Testing out my makeshift first aid, I pull on my socks and add on my more rigid brace before putting my cleat back on. "Go back to your positions." I say flatly. "I'll take care of everything." My good mood has vanished. 5-4 won't help. 10-4 won't do. I want to crush this team. I want to butcher their near-win. We do so, my team following my directions as best they can. We win, 20-4.   

"What was that about?" My coach nearly screams, yelling at me after the game. "How many times do I have to tell you not to treat yourself on the field? It makes all of us look bad!"   

The urge to kill suddenly announces its presence in the depths of my mind. "Would you rather I delay the game further?" I respond calmly, binding ice to my wound now that the game is over. The nurse gave me crutches and instructions on how to care for my ankle.   

"Just... don't ruin Teiko's reputation!" It is in that moment that I decide just what I want to do to utterly anger my coach. Akashi meets up with me as I hobble to the gates of the school.   

"Have you decided what you will do?" I look at the redhead in amusement, my lip twisting into a painful smile.   

"I suppose." I reply, mindful of the bumps in the cement. "How angry do you think he'll be?"   

"Quite."   

"Good enough for me." I reply calmly. "I'll trust you just this once."   

My summer and weekends, hell, any moment I wasn't in the classroom, consisted of brutal training in both sports. My softball scholarship was extended to include basketball as soon as I could play moderately well.   

Between the coaching from Akashi and Kuroko and the exercises I did in the hallways, my body was stressed and pushed to its limit. It wasn't all for naught. Within a few months, I was able to surpass many of the second-string players.   

One day, practice was a bit different from usual.   

"I want you to play against Kise." Akashi says. I normally practice on my own or with either Kuroko or Akashi in a separate gym. I want to question the redhead, but I learned earlier that Akashi doesn't appreciate being questioned.   

"Fine." I say. After all, I did promise to do as he said. "Now?"  

"Now." That's basically how I ended up racing Kise, neck to neck, as he dribbled his way down the court. Just as he looks my way, I apparently pull one of my vanishing acts and steal the ball from him. We race the other direction. I barely manage to get the ball into the net.   

"Heights! What in earth do you think you're doing?" For a moment my last name sounds completely foreign. Then I blink and glance at the familiar outline of my softball coach.   

"Ah, Coach. I'm practicing. Why?" He stalks forward.   

"You should be on the field."   

"Games don't start for a long time."   

"What are you even doing here?!"  

"Practicing." Kise stares at the coach in irritation. "You're distracting me."   

"What do you think you're doing, playing with these guys? You don't play basketball." I blink slowly.   

"Really? I could've sworn I was playing it. Kise, what do you call this sport?" Kise stares at me with a slightly amused expression.  

 "Basketball." he answers.   

"So I _do_ play basketball?" Kise nods. "Okay, maybe this is just me misunderstanding, but it looks like I do play basketball, Coach." Coach seethes.   

"Yet you neglect-"  

"You're wrong. If anything, I'm more dedicated." My coach narrows his eyes. "I practice softball in the morning with Haruna, Kagome, and Mizuki. I do this after school." He reddens furiously and storms out, but not before saying, "It's not like you could ever be any good at basketball!"   

My eyes narrow furiously as I watch him exit the gym. "I think he triggered it." I barely register the words before I'm off, racing with Kise for the ball. My legs have never felt so swift. I've never had this sort of confidence in my abilities before. All I can see is Kise and the ball, the court and the hoops.   

Our game to 5 points takes almost an hour. In the end, I barely lose at 5-4.

I continued to practice with Akashi's team for a long time. Just before basketball season actually began, Akashi decided it was time for a serious discussion with me. I nearly fainted with terror. His last "serious talk" had resulted in me playing streetball for nearly two months. Let me tell you, that stuff is farging  _hard_ for a beginner. 

"I've seen enough of your practices." He said. That then resulted in me having to  _officially_ join basketball. I played in their next game, and all those stupid little things that I'd noted, all those little problems with the team grew bright before my eyes. They were blinding, terrifying. Kuroko quit basketball the year after, forcing me to play in his stead. 

In my mind, pushed far into the back corners where cobwebs likely reside, are the memories of that Teiko team, of the terror they inspired. They must've really hated the sport to play as they did. I grew to dread playing with the Miracles. When middle school came to a close, I was approached twice. 

" _Come with me to Rakuzan_." 

" _Come with me to Seirin_." 

In the end, my choice was dreadfully obvious. 

"Hai-chan, you're more absentminded than usual." Kuroko says, walking with me into the unusually new school. I risk a glance in his direction. 

"Just thinking." I reply quietly. Kuroko looks at me curiously. It took me a long time to be able to read his expressions, but I've gotten the hang of it, and I'm happy I did. The throng of students yelling things, all in Japanese, feels overwhelming. I can't understand a lot of it still, but Kuroko helps me quite frequently. "You're going to join basketball?" Kuroko nods. 

"Yes." It's a rather obvious question, but I wanted to make sure. I nod in return. "You should join as well, Hai-chan. I don't think there's a girl's basketball team here, and they have no softball." 

"You're right." I say quietly. As much as I hated playing softball in my last year, growing to detest the sound of cleats and the ringing of bats, I still want to play the game. "I should join a sport of some sort. That's probably what they'd want." 

Kuroko offers me a smile before we approach the booth. I have to have Kuroko fill in all the kanji I can't remember on the application form. "Are you sure it's okay for me to join? It is a boys' team." I say, reading over my answers. 

"There isn't a rule against it." He replies. We walk away casually, while this ridiculously tall redhead nearly runs into us. He doesn't see Kuroko.  _Of course._ He barely notices me. 

 

"Hai-chan, we'll be late." Kuroko walks with me as I attempt to stuff my snacks back into my backpack without spilling them. 

"Sorry, Kuroko! I'm really just all over the place today." He hurries into the locker room as I approach the coach... or is she the manager? "E-Excuse me?" She doesn't see me. At least, I think that's what it is. I attempt projecting my presence toward her. "Excuse me?" 

The girl does a double take at me. Caramel hair, short and soft, distracts me momentarily. "Can I help you?" She asks, crossing her arms. 

"Ah, yeah. Is this where basketball is meeting?" She nods. "My friend is interested in joining... um..." I nearly wring my hands. "Do you accept applications from girls?" Her eyes widen. "It's j-just that my usual sport isn't o-offered and you guys don't seem to have a girls' team, so I-I just um... I'm sorry!" 

My face reddens in embarrassment as I try to cease my stutter. "You play?" Brown eyes staring into me. I nod hesitantly. 

"Yes." She gives me the once over, as if trying to look past my uniform. I glance away. 

"My name is Aida Riko, I'm the coach. Please come with me." Kuroko passes us as I walk with her into the locker room. "Please take off your clothes." I stare at her for a moment, my face reddening with embarrassment and a bit of indignation before I submit to her unwavering gaze. "I know how it must look, but I promise it's just so I can judge your capabilities." I'm forced to strip to my underclothes. 

"What's your usual sport?" She asks, circling me like some sort of predator. 

"Softball." I say quietly. She nods. 

"Explains the physique. Did you train for basketball and softball simultaneously?" I nod this time. She hums under her breath. "Switch into your gym clothes." I gratefully comply, pulling on a pair of shorts and an old t-shirt before slipping on my athletic brace and shoes. "Old injury?" I nod, stretching the tense muscles of my shoulder. "Are you a foreign student?" 

"Yes." I reply smoothly, tying up my shoulder length hair into a ponytail. I'd cut it a week ago, so the length no longer bothers me. 

"Your Japanese is pretty good." Aida says sweetly, offering me a smile. "It must be hard to be away from home." I offer a slight smile in return. 

"I guess." I stand off to the side as Aida orders the boys to remove their shirts. I have to say that Kuroko definitely seems subpar compared to the others, but it works to his advantage. Introductions are made with instructions for tomorrow's practice. 

"I hope you come back tomorrow." Aida says, her eyes bright. "It'll be good for this team." I look at Kuroko anxiously before changing and heading home, my ghost-like friend right beside me. 

 _Riiing! Riiing!_ My phone distracts me as we cross the street to Kuroko's favorite hangout, Maiji Burger. I gesture for him go ahead before I open my phone, paling at the number that pops up. "Hello?" I answer, waiting outside the fast food joint. 

"Hai." Any hope of the number being wrong is dashed to pieces. 

"Ah, Akashi-san..." I say quietly, shivering despite the balmy air. "This is a surprise." Akashi is silent for a long time. I'm about to speak again, to wonder what I did, before he answers this question for me. 

"You've upset the balance, Hai." I shudder. 

"H-How so?" 

"Two of Teiko's Miracles on one team?" I frown. 

"Akashi, I don't qualify to be a Miracle. I'm not even from this  _country_." Akashi is silent. 

"Regardless of where you were born, you cannot deny the fact that you played as an equal with the rest of us. To have two teammates on the same team is not within the agreement." I gulp loudly. 

"What would you have me do, Akashi? Switch to a new school? Besides, Kuroko and I aren't entirely compatible as players. Our styles won't mesh correctly." I reply, nodding to Kuroko as he looks at me through the window. 

"Aomine is in need of a new shadow." I blanch completely, my legs shaking. 

"Akashi..."

"Their history together no longer matters, Hai. Aomine is in need of a shadow." I want to complain, to choose someone else. "You could have Kise if you liked, but he's already adjusted to his team. Aomine is not a part of his team. Having someone who will willingly revolve around his play style will be essential for us to compete as we used to." 

"But Kuroko..."

"Tetsuya can take care of himself, Hai. He will find a new light. His style is no longer compatible with Aomine's." I close my eyes, rubbing my temples. "You have no arguments you can use to convince me otherwise. I've arranged for the necessary papers to be ready for you." 

"You can't do this to me!" I exclaim, absolutely livid. "I'm not a puppet, Akashi! I'll play for Seirin if I want!" 

"You will play for Aomine." Akashi's word is final. It always has been. "All that's left is for you to show up at Touou and meet the coach." He hangs up before I even have a chance to open my mouth.  _Kuroko, what am I going to do?_ My chest constricts. 

"Is everything okay?" Kuroko comes out with two vanilla shakes, giving one to me as he walks me home. I shake my head. 

"I'm sorry, Kuroko." He gives me an uncertain look. "Akashi called just now..." Blue eyes widen slightly. "I... I don't know how to say it..." I do. I do know how, but I want to forget the sentence desperately. "I'm supposed to play for Touou." 

"Aomine-kun's school?" Kuroko asks, concern lacing the undertones of his voice. I nod, gulping. 

"I'm really, really sorry, Kuroko! I want to go to Seirin! I want to play basketball with you!" I wish there was something I could do. "Akashi didn't even let me protest... he wouldn't listen to me at all. I don't know what to do." 

"It's okay, Hai-chan." Kuroko says after a while. "I understand. Akashi's word has always been that way with you." He holds out his fist to me, a slight smile gracing his features. "Help me make Aomine smile again." 

My eyes are burning with tears, but I fist-bump Kuroko as best I can. "I promise." 


	4. Chapter Four

Who was I to think Akashi could've been joking? As soon as my doorbell rings, I know that Akashi's been dead serious from the start. I'm going to Touou. _Damn it!_ My next thought is probably the most worrisome. _Who in the hell is ringing my doorbell this early?_ I know for a fact that I can sleep for another hour and a half and still make it to Touou early. Dressed in my pajamas, I open the door groggily. Squinting eyes stare back at me. "Who the hell are you?" I ask, leaning against the door. "And why are you waking me up this early?"   

"I'm Imayoshi Shoichi, captain of Touou's basketball team. You're Hai-san?" I nod drowsily. "I'm supposed to show you around campus since you'll be a new addition to our team."   

"Gimme five minutes." I say, inviting him in. Last night Touou's uniform was sitting in boxes on my doorstep, along with textbooks for classes I didn't know I was enrolled in. I put on the mandatory summer uniform, make sure I look presentable, gather my basketball stuff and everything else I need for school including snacks and a premade bento, snatch my breakfast from the toaster, and am out the door, locking it, within five minutes.   

"You're pretty short, aren't you?" Imayoshi says pleasantly. "I can see straight above you."   

"Your face is _still_ within easy punching distance." I reply in an equally pleasant tone of voice. "Anyway, Imayoshi-san, does Aomine attend practice, or is he skipping?" Imayoshi seems to sober up slightly at the question.   

"He may not attend practice, but he's still ridiculously strong." I give the taller player an amused glance.   

"I know Aomine is strong. I just wanted to know if he's been attending practice at all. Momoi must be going nuts."     

 

"Hai-chan!" Huge breasts suffocate me as Momoi drags me to her chest for a hug. I struggle feebly.   

"Hey, Momoi." I croak, tugging myself away. "Doing well?" She nods enthusiastically, glancing about the gym for a moment.  

"Let me introduce you to the players you'll most likely be played with." She says. First comes a tall-ish guy with short hair and what appears to be a permanent frown. "This is Susa Yoshinori, our small forward." Next, a tall blond that appears a little too irritated. "Wakamatsu Kousuke, center." A brunette that seems shy. "Sakurai Ryo, shooting guard. You've met Imayoshi, our point guard. Dai-chan is our power forward, like last time."   

"Hai, it's been a long time." Aomine appears out of nowhere, a hand pressing down on my head.   

"Aomine." I say in warning, giving him a glare. He removes his hand after giving me a rather menacing grin. "Did he tell you?"   

"Some of it. Keep up and we won't have any issues." Aomine and I glare at each other for a few moments.   

"Ah, you're the foreign player?" A man with unusually curly hair and sly eyes pops out of nowhere. "I'm Harasawa Katsunori, the head coach." I'm still bristling from the 'foreign student' comment. _Isn't it obvious?_   

"Nice to meet you." I say politely, bowing slightly. "I'm Alex Heights. You can call me Hai." The coach gives me a strange, calculating look.   

"Are you sure she can keep up with Aomine?" Harasawa looks at Momoi with curiosity. I grit my teeth.   

"Hai-chan is capable." Momoi says firmly, pressing against my side slightly. "She's played with Aomine-kun and the others for almost as long as Kuroko-kun." Aomine and I both look away from her at the mention of Kuroko. "Our former captain personally recommended her for Aomine."   

"Didn't Akashi make you switch schools?" Aomine says curiously, whacking the back of my head when I give him a sharp glare.   

"Yeah." I answer. "I was going to go to Seirin with Kuroko." Aomine's expression darkens.   

"I see." Silence engulfs the entirety of the gym.   

"Hai, get changed. I want to see your skills in action." says Coach Harasawa. I nod, walking into the locker room. I change into my shorts and a sleeveless shirt before putting my hair in its usual ponytail and slipping on my brace and shoes. I return within a few minutes.   

"Here we go." Coach tosses me a basketball. "Have any shooting ability?"   

"Nothing outstanding." I reply. "My fundamentals are pretty solid, if that's what you're going to test." Harasawa smirks.   

"Then Aomine will be your opponent." The tall teen and I stare each other down. I can hear Momoi desperately attempting to change his mind, but to avail.   

"I'll take you on." Aomine says with a crooked smirk. "It's been a while since you've played against me." My eyes darken as the unmistakable need to win consumes me.   

"Don't disappoint me." I reply. "I may not have your strength, but I can still match you." We wait just long enough for the court to clear before the two of us go at each other.   

Our match to five drags on for quite a while, a flurry of speed and tricks, streetball and tactics. I block more shots than I care to count, and break away from Aomine enough to see a thirsty grin on his face widen.   

Aomine is the first to smash his way into the Zone. I follow suit, running, sliding, dribbling without so much as a second thought. Aomine looks a little bigger than usual. Taller, happier. We never do find out the winner. One moment I'm about to jump for a shot when Momoi steps in front of me, holding a phone. I dodge her, about to shoot when a chilling voice stops me.   

" _Alex, stop_." I freeze in place, turning to identify the voice in cranky English.   

"Thanks, Akashi-kun." Momoi says gratefully, hanging up.   

"Did you really... just for that?" I ask, tossing the ball back to Aomine. He looks as pissed as I feel.   

"The two of you weren't listening!" She exclaims, pink eyes wide. I sigh, glancing at Aomine.   

"A draw?" I ask, raising an eyebrow. Aomine's lips tighten into a tight smile.   

"For now." I give Momoi an irritated look.   

"I still don't have the usual amount of data." Momoi hums, looking me over. "Are you still as heavy as you used to be?" I sharpen my gaze into a glare.   

"It's not my fault I weigh that much! I exercise and stuff!" I hiss.   

"I'm not calling you fat, Hai-chan." Momoi says, poking and prodding me. "It's obvious that you just have an unusual amount of muscle. Are you still cross training?" I nod slightly.   

I tug my shirt away from my skin slightly, disgusted at the damp sensation that pervades from it. "It's good you can keep up." Imayoshi is the first to speak. "Saves the rest of us a considerable amount of trouble." Aomine and I both look irked.   

"Is he like that with everyone?" I ask, looking to Sakurai. The boy nods slightly, a feeble motion. I hum in response. "Stop poking me!" I snap, stepping away from Momoi. "That's seriously annoying!" Momoi simply laughs at me.   

"I'm off." Aomine says suddenly. "Hai, you coming or not?" One look at a fuming Wakamatsu makes my decision.   

"I'll find you later." I reply. "Might as well see how these guys practice." Aomine rolls his eyes before leaving.   

"His attitude seriously sucks!" Wakamatsu screams, turning red with rage.   

"Has for a while now." I say flatly, watching Aomine disappear. "Although I can understand why."   Wakamatsu bends slightly to look me in the eye.

"You agree, right? Imayoshi, why are you letting him leave?" Imayoshi offers no explanation. "You're short." Wakamatsu says suddenly. I give him a glare.   

"Thank you, Captain Obvious." The blond pales slightly before laughing. "You don't make him practice?"   

"As long as he makes his shots, it's okay." Coach Harasawa says. "The same applies to you." My eyes widen.   

"O-Okay." I say. _Why wouldn't you have your players practice together?_ Momoi gives me a sympathetic look. I wish I were at Seirin.   

"Hai-chan..." Momoi's voice is unusually soft as I unlace my shoes and take another brace from my bag.  

"What?" I ask, looking wary.   

"It won't end up like that again."  

_I glance up at the taller player, wishing I wasn't cornered like I am now. "How would you like me to break those legs of yours?"_

I give the pinkette a softer expression. "I know." Pink eyes widen with surprise. "At any rate, Aomine seems to have disappeared. Annoy him into walking me home and I'll see what I can do to make him show up tomorrow, even if it's only for a moment."   

Momoi's eyes brighten considerably before she prances off. "Can you actually do it?" Wakamatsu looks at me skeptically. I give him a wicked smile.   

The next day I have to kick the doors to the gym open, dragging a thrashing sack behind me. "Hai-san, what are you doing?" Susa asks me, eyes curious.   

"Didn't I say I'd get him here?" I haul the sack further into the gym before releasing the contents of my bundle. Aomine stares up dazedly as a couple of skin mags flutter out of reach.   

"Oi! Hai, you're so dead! This isn't even the right model!" The hothead exclaims, waving a magazine. I give him an unimpressed look.   

"Oops. Sorry I don't know the difference in models. I'm not a pervert like you." I reply. He calms down after a few more minutes of ranting.   

"There's no use in me practicing." He says after a few minutes. I grimace. "The only one who can beat me is me."   

"I'm supposed to coordinate my plays with you, Aomine. At least let me practice." I intentionally leave out everything Coach Harasawa previously said.   

"Do what you did in Teiko." He says unsympathetically. "It's not like you need to practice, either." I hope he misses the tortured expression that flashes across my face.   

In the end, I let Aomine walk out. I can't decide whether to be angry or depressed, and choose neither. Silence ensues as I stalk into the locker room and change into my gym clothes. "He might not want to practice with you," I say with great irritation, "but I _do_. Stupid Ahomine."  

Wakamatsu and the others give me surprised looks as I tug my hair into a ponytail and adjust my shirt. "Show me what we can work on."    

In the end, I reap no rewards. Practice is overly easy and irritating. My blood boils slightly at the thought that anyone could just make practicing something optional. I leave a few minutes early to make use of the treadmills in another section of the gym.   

Inhale. Exhale. Run, run, run. It was Akashi that first had me run for long periods of time until I jogged to school every morning. I walk now, but I still run like I used to. Inhale. Exhale. Run.   

"So you're doing a different sort of training?" The voice of Coach Harasawa startled me, but I keep running at my usual pace.   

"Might as well. I don't mind showing up to practice, but your practices are relatively easy compared to Teiko's." I answer.   

"For a foreigner, your Japanese is pretty good."  

"Akashi didn't want any misunderstandings. Kuroko is an excellent teacher."  

"Why is this Akashi person so important?" I nearly stop running in surprise.   

"Akashi's word is always final." I say flatly. "It's simply how it is." My hour is nearly up, so I sprint the last ten minutes before shoving all my stuff into my backpack. "If we ever play Rakuzan... I don't think victory will be easy. It'll probably be the most difficult game of the season."   

I run home, my backpack slowing me down slightly. My stomach rumbles slightly as I pass Maiji Burger, so I decide to drop by and buy my dinner. "Hello, Hai-chan." Kuroko's voice sounds beside me as I find myself sitting at a neighboring table. My eyes widen with surprise.   

"Kuroko..." I say softly, feeling my expression soften considerably. "How is Seirin? Are they treating you okay?"   

"Yes." Kuroko says. "We have a practice match tomorrow against Kaijo. Would you be interested in coming?" I pause for a moment.   

"Is it directly after school?" Kuroko shakes his head.   

"An hour and a half later." I could practice for an hour in the gym and take the subway.   

"I'll do my best to make it on time. Where is it?" I respond.   

"Kaijo." For a moment, we both stare at each other silently. "I have found a new light."   

"Who?" I ask, sliding to sit across from Kuroko.   

"Kagami Taiga." Kuroko says. "The tall redhead." I nod my head enthusiastically.   

"That's great, Kuroko!" My mouth splits into a grin. "Maybe... he and Aomine..." Kuroko nods.   

"I hope so." Then my smile falters, and I look down at my sweating shake. "Hai-chan?" 

"Aomine... has changed since the last time you played with him. I think he misses you, Kuroko." My hands shake as I clasp them under the table. "I don't know what to do with him. For a long time I was scared to play with Aomine, especially since your place was a hard one to fill. I..." I look up at Kuroko openly, trying to show him everything I want to say. "I want Aomine to reconcile with you. I want him to go back to the way he was... but I don't know what to do. He doesn't show up to practice. He won't even let me use him for practicing coordination plays!" I grit my teeth.   

"Aomine was always supportive of new players when he started out at Teiko." Kuroko says wistfully, his eyes softening. "He was happy when you decided to try basketball. He was just too stubborn to show it."   

"As much as he was supportive toward me playing, he favored you above everyone else. You leaving really hit him hard... but I don't think he blames you at all." Kuroko and I exchange slight smiles. "Teiko really did change quite drastically."   

"I pity you for playing with them during that time." Kuroko says. I shake my head.    

"You had it far worse." I glance at the clock in the corner. "I have to get home. I don't want to be out late. I hope you can at least change Kise's mind. The rest will follow." Kuroko nods and says goodbye as I begin the long trek home.   

_"How about that face of yours? You wouldn't mind a scar or two, would you?"_

The streets seem slower, duller, emptier than usual as I turn a corner.   

_"C'mon, it's all in good fun~! Don't people like you enjoy this sort of thing?"_

_"No!"_

"...Hai?" I bolt at the sound of my name, wanting nothing more than to get home and hide underneath the covers of my bed.  

_"Can't you run any faster? Those legs of yours aren't much use to you now, are they?"_

"Hai!" Faster and faster, until I can only see blurs.   

_Dark eyes staring at me, devoid of any hint of mercy. "Stop it!"_

"Hai! Hai, stop running!" _Run and run and run and run and hide. Run and hide._ A hand grabs my wrist, and I instantly try to worm my way free.   

"Stop it! Let go!" _Can't think can't think can't think. "Let me go! Let go..."_

A set of dark blue eyes look nearly liquid as I'm tugged to a body. "Hai, it's okay." Long arms wrap around me as I shake. "Remember? Everything's fine." I shudder and lean forward.   

"Aomine..." I murmur, closing my eyes. "I'm sorry." Teiko's former ace doesn't say anything for a long time.   

"Are you on your way home?" He asks after a few minutes. I nod.   

"Yes." Then I open my eyes and pull away. "Sorry. That must've been rather bothersome for you-"  

"Stop it already." Aomine says, narrowing his eyes. "You always say things like that, but then we find you later hiding under the covers after you miss three days of school." I look away.   

"It's fine already." I mutter, wishing I were home. "It's fine." I start my trek home again after I start to recognize the streets around me. Surprisingly, Aomine falls into step beside me. "Don't you have somewhere to be?" I ask. He shakes his head silently.   

"They got pissed again." _And here comes the usual._ "Can I crash at yours?" _Like clockwork._

"Yeah." _I don't want to be alone._ The chill of evening settles around me, making goose bumps rise along my arms. It's good that we aren't too far from home now.   

"Must be nice to live alone." Aomine says for the umpteenth time this year. I cast a weary glance in his direction.   

"Only until you realize how much you spend just breathing." I reply. Normally I just offer Aomine a tired smile. "After you realize how much you have to work to pay bills and eat and go to school, you appreciate having parents around. When you're alone, you notice all the empty, sad noises that houses make. Until there's no one to say 'welcome back' to you, everything is taken for granted. It helps if you're at least in the same country." Aomine narrows his eyes.   

"They stopped by?"  

 "Stayed a half hour drive away from me for a month and only told me after they got back." I say quietly. "Fun, as always. Maybe coming here was a bad idea, after all. I mean, I haven't seen anyone from home or even seen my hometown since I came during middle school." Aomine is dead silent until I pull out my keys and push open the heavy door to reveal a dark, cold apartment.   

"They always do that to you." He says, slipping off his shoes. Aomine comes here often enough to know that I'm fine with everyone just walking around in his or her socks or barefoot. "How many times is this? Four? Do they even check up on you at all? Do they even talk to you?" I turn on the lights as Aomine turns on the TV.   

"Sometimes my little sister will send me an email." I reply, whipping out my rice cooker and some veggies. "My parents have work and my brother is busy trying not to fail seventh grade." Aomine watches silently from the couch before sitting on my counter, watching me work.   

"They fight as much as mine, right?" I nod. "What did you do?" I frown.   

"I hid a lot. Sometimes I drew their attention to me when my siblings were in trouble. It really was dependent on the situation." We have these talks often. I like Aomine off the court. He's a nice, really passionate, genuine, stupid guy with an unfortunate addiction to skin mags.  

We eat in silence. _So glad it's a Thursday._ "Aomi-"  

"Daiki."   

"What?" I stare at the bluenette in surprise.   

"You can call me Daiki... like you did in middle school." My jaw nearly drops. "But in return I get to call you Alex! Got it?" I nod slightly.  

"You did your homework?" Aomine sweatdrops. "C'mon. I'll help you." _Daiki, huh?_


	5. Chapter Five

The only thing that wakes me is the sound of sizzling from the kitchen. It's twenty minutes past when I should've woken, but I don't have the heart to get out of bed. "Why do I smell food?" I murmur, burrowing further under the covers.

"Oi, baka, get out of bed." Aomine says kicking the edge of my futon gently. "You'll be late."   

"I don't wanna." I reply, cocooning myself into a ball of warmth. "I wanna stay home."   

"If you do that you won't get to go to Kuroko's game today." I stop burrowing.  

"Why's that?" I ask, narrowing my eyes.   

"Satsuki has some information on a practice match and in order to get it both of us have to show up to practice." I groan loudly.   

"Can't we skip school and go straight to practice?" My blanket is ripped away roughly.   

"You'll miss your lessons, idiot. C'mon." With that, I'm somehow persuaded to pay attention in school by the boy who sleeps through every one of his classes. _He's so lucky we're in the same class!_ I shoulder my way through the halls, Aomine walking just a couple steps behind me. While everyone will notice him, it seems I'm somehow invisible. The struggle is real, guys. I get crushed twice.   

"Hai-chan, you were late to school today!" Momoi says with a pout, bouncing her way over to me. "I didn't get a chance to see you at all!" I offer her a sheepish smile before dodging an overly excited hug.   

"Ah, my bad." I say, rubbing the back of my head. "I accidentally overslept and Ao-" Aomine gives me a reprimanding glare. "Daiki had to wake me up." Momoi gives the two of us an interested and suddenly illuminated look as she smirks.   

"I see." She says. "Well then you have to call me Satsuki, too!" I give Momoi a strange look.   

"Momoi, I-"  

"Satsuki!"   

"Mo-"  

"Satsuki! Call me Satsuki!" Silence engulfs the gym as the stare down between the pinkette and me is monitored.   

"F-Fine." I say, looking away. "If that's really what you want." Momoi throws her arms around me in a hug and, with a rather menacing stare, presses closer. "You're a bit close..."   

"I'll get off as soon as you say my name." Momoi knows that I dislike physical touch. I try to worm my way free several times only to fail each time.   

"Aomine, help me!" I plead. The bluenette gives me an unimpressed expression before leaving to take some of Sakurai's bento. "OI! Don't you choose food over me! Help me out here, Aomine!"   

"He's mad you're not calling him _Daiki."_ Momoi says.   

"Please get off." I say, squirming in discomfort.   

"Get off who?"   

"Get off me."   

"Who're you talking to?"   

"You?"  

"Who is you?"   

"The only person in this gym with pink hair!" I exclaim, stomping my foot furiously.   

"What's my name, then?" I sweatdrop as she presses closer.   

"Satsuki." I say.   

"What was that?" The pinkette presses even closer, her face squished against mine. "I don't think we can all hear you."   

"Satsuki." I repeat, although this time my voice is louder.   

"Still can't hear you~!" She repeats, giggling uncontrollably. I grow irked.   

"Satsuki, get off me!" I yell, my face reddening with anger. The taller girl laughs and relinquishes her hold on me. She then grows serious.   

"Our next match is in two days." Momoi says pleasantly, looking at her notebook. "They shouldn't pose much of a threat at our current level." Aomine instantly walks off, his eyes narrowed and bored. "A-Aomine-kun!" She exclaims, stepping toward him.  

 "I won't play anyone who can't entertain me." He says, looking back balefully. "Alex, come." I give Momoi an apologetic look before hurrying after the ace. "Any team that plays below my level isn't worth my time." He says, growling out the words. Aomine's long strides make it difficult for me to keep up with his swift gait.   

"Daiki, I can't walk that fast..." I say hesitantly. "My legs are much shorter than yours." Aomine slows his pace just slightly so I don't have to jog just to keep up. "I understand how you feel, though. Even though I don't completely agree with you."   

Aomine gives me a hard stare before climbing up a ladder to the rooftop. I follow him hesitantly, much less accustomed to hiding from Momoi. "What's the fun in basketball if there's nobody to compete with?" Aomine says with frustration. I frown slightly.   

"Daiki..." I clasp my hands together tightly, wishing I could show him just how much fun basketball can be. "Do you want to watch Kuroko play? He has a match against Kaijo, Kise's school." For a moment, Aomine's eyes look bright and alive. Then they dull into boredom.   

"The winner is already obvious. Go on your own. Tell me if anything interesting happens." He turns away, and I feel my shoulders slump.   

"Right..." I glance at Aomine. "The key is in the usual place." I climb down the ladder and exit school grounds, trying to remember the way to the Seirin from Touou. It takes me the better part of twenty minutes just to get directed correctly, and I end up a few minutes late. Kaijo itself is hard enough to navigate. I hate asking for directions, especially since people often talk too fast for me to grasp most of it. Asking them to repeat themselves is embarrassing. I end up asking for directions anyway.  

"Haicchi~!" Kise's voice echoes in the gym as I enter, searching for where I can view the practice game best. I'm knocked over in 0.2 seconds with the large blond crushing me in a bear hug. "I haven't seen you in forever~!" I give the over-friendly man-child a tight-lipped smile.   

"Ah, Kise... it's nice to see you again." He releases me and helps me up.   "So you're here to watch our match? Bring Aominecchi with you?"   

"Ah, I'm just by myself today, Kise. Aomine... couldn't make it." Kise's face doesn't give away anything.   

"Just watch~!" Kise says pleasantly. "I'm going to beat Seirin today, and I'll bring Kurokocchi back." I give an uneasy glance to Kuroko and his team, watching them warm up.   

"Honestly, Kise..." I say with exasperation. "Whatever." Kuroko looks determined today, and his partner, the tall redhead, reminds me sharply of the first Aomine I met. I give a slight smile. "I'll watch from up." I offer Kuroko a wave as he notices me before walking to the more appropriate viewing area.   

I know the Seirin coach, Aida, is watching me from her place on the court. I give her a slight nod from my place above before giving the whole gym the once over. _Only half the court? What is Kaijo thinking?_ Kaijou’s coach yells at Kise, although I can't really understand what he's saying. Kise gives a pleading speech, and the coach apparently shoots him down. Seirin looks furious.   

I fall asleep before the game has a chance to start.   

"Oi!" I wake with a start, my eyes bleary and thoughts foggy. The face looming toward me startles me enough that I crush my fist into it. The much taller figure falls back, staring at me in shock. I sit, wide-eyed and more than a little anxious.   

"S-Sorry!" I say quickly, scooting back. "I-I really.... I d-didn't... u-uh..."   

"Kagami-kun, the look on your face is scary." Kuroko's sudden speech startles me again, making me jump slightly. It's true that this Kagami's face is rather scary. He's very intimidating. My phone vibrates, and a text shows up.   

_Oi, the match should be over. When are you leaving? I'll meet you somewhere. -Aomine_

I glance between the two males as they bicker.   

_Sorry. I fell asleep. It seems Seirin won. -Hai_

"Kagami-kun, you should stop yelling." Kuroko turns away from the fuming boy and looks to me. "I'm surprised you came to watch us."   

"I said I'd come, didn't I? Sorry I fell asleep... I haven't been feeling well." Kuroko's eyes flash slightly. I attempt stretching before standing drowsily. "Aomine's going to get pissed if I don't get home soon."   

"Hai-chan... Did it happen again?" I stare at Kuroko sheepishly.   

"Aomine had to chase me down for a few blocks, but it turned out okay in the end." I reply. Silence engulfs the two of us, and it seems like Kagami can read the atmosphere enough not to speak. My stomach growls in unison with Kagami's. "Why don't we go to Maiji Burger?" I offer, looking between the two Seirin players. "My treat."   

"You really don't want to tr-"  

"Hell yeah!" Kagami abruptly cuts off Kuroko.   

"-eat this guy." He finishes. I smile slightly, wanting to laugh but refusing to in case it's impolite.   

"It's okay. I have some extra cash burning a hole in my wallet." I reply, smiling slightly. _I'm going to Maiji Burger with Kuroko and Kagami. Wanna come? -Hai_

I walk out side by side with the ace and his shadow, nearly running into the team itself. I'm about to skirt around the group in order to avoid them when Aida Riko grabs my arm, startling me. I almost jump in place, but tense and freeze instead. "Hai-chan, was it? I haven't seen you since the first day of school." She says, narrowing her eyes. I offer a nervous smile.  

"I had to switch schools, and transferred to another. Sorry, Aida." I reply, trying to retract my arm from her grasp. I feel like electricity is racing up my arm.   

"Oh? Where to?" She asks, loosening her grip only slightly. I gulp.   

"A-Ah, Touou Academy." I reply hesitantly.   

"And you're playing there?" I nod. "For Touou?" Another. "The boys' team?" Again. "Why did you even bother to switch?" I have many different answers running through my head, all of them incomplete and in fragmented Japanese.   

"Akashi-kun told her to." Kuroko says, coming to my rescue as always. I shy away from Aida and Kagami's inquiring glances. "It is best to do as Akashi-kun says." I want to pull another of my vanishing acts, but it seems that won't be working in my favor today. I'll just have to do something else, if I can figure out what to do in time to do it.   

"Who is Akashi?" Kagami asks bluntly. Kuroko and I wince simultaneously.   

"Former captain of the Generation of Miracles." We say in unison. A shudder rips down my spine. "Scary as hell." I add under my breath. Kuroko gives me a curious look before I pry myself free of Aida's grip. 

"I should be able to play against you at least once." I say, looking over the team behind her. "I... I really wish I could've played on this team, with Kuroko, and you, and even Bakagami here." I say, pointing at the overly tall and hilariously offended redhead. "I'm sorry it turned out like this."   

"Yeah." Aida says. "I am, too." I sigh with a hint of frustration. _I'll pass. I'm raiding your fridge. -Aomine._ Aomine's good about that- telling me things, that is. Particularly when they involve things I need to buy.   

_Sounds good. I won't take too long. Make yourself at home. -Hai_ Kuroko glances subtly at my phone before I put it away and sigh. "I gotta get going if I don't want to get myself into trouble." I say. "It was nice seeing you again, Aida-san. I hope I can play against Seirin so everyone can show me what sort of team they've created." I bow slightly. "See ya 'round."  I take off, lengthening my strides slightly so I walk faster than I was before. I don't want to stick around and see what I could've joined, what I could've been a part of. I'm in Touou now. I should only have the desire to play for them, so why do I still want to play for Seirin?  

Kagami and Kuroko are a step behind me, talking excitedly about the match they've just won. Yeah, maybe I should've let them go home with their team. I suddenly feel that I've intruded on their personal life. Swallowing my unease, I manage to find Maiji Burger without too much hassle. Kuroko orders his usual, and his new light gets some ten burgers. He better eat every last one of them.   

"Are you American?" Kagami asks suddenly as I order my shake and a burger. I smile and nod to him before paying and joining Kuroko at his usual booth.   

"I am." I reply smoothly, feeling vanilla melt over my tongue. My burger soon faces the wrath of my empty stomach as silence engulfs us.   

My mind wanders aimlessly, mostly I bringing up the past and wondering how things could've changed. I hardly notice that when I finish my burger and begin to frown as my thoughts continue. "-an. Hai-chan." I'm brought back to the present when I recognize Kuroko trying to get my attention.   

"Ah, sorry!" I say sheepishly, rubbing the back of my head. "I've been really absentminded lately." I take a long sip from my shake as I look over at him. "What were you saying?"   

"You have a practice match tomorrow, right? Momoi sent me something about that." It amuses me that after all these years Momoi is still up to her eyes in love with Kuroko. I nod a couple times to assure him the information is correct, noting how confused Kagami looks. "Who are you playing?" I frown slightly.  

"Honestly, I've no idea. Daiki left in the middle of her speech once we were told the team wouldn't be too much trouble, and I followed him since I had to make sure he didn't get into any trouble. I'm really hoping for a good game, though." I reply, frowning more harshly. "Honestly, that boy needs to at least wait until Satsuki is finished." Kuroko raises an eyebrow at my first-name basis with the two former Teiko students, and I shrug.   

"I see. Do you know where you'll be playing?" I smile wanly.   

"I think it's at Touou, if you'd like to come see it. I hope Daiki will at least show up to watch... it doesn't seem like he'll play at all...and the coach seems to only encourage him to skip. He won't even make practice mandatory for the two of us... what kind of coach does that?" I say, gripping my cup violently. "It'll be like middle school all over again."   

"You're as pessimistic as always." Kuroko says flatly. I wince slightly. "But from the sound of it, you're correct." My phone buzzes violently.   

"Ah, sorry." I say sheepishly. "I have to answer this." I answer it hesitantly. "Hello?"   

"How long are you planning to stay out, Alex?" Daiki's voice surprises me.   

 

"Sorry, Daiki. I've lost track of time again." I reply with embarrassment.   

"It's already dark out. Stay at Maiji and I'll come get you." He says. Daiki hangs up suddenly, and I'm left staring at the dark screen of my phone before glancing out the window.   

"It _is_ dark. How did I lose track of time like that?" I murmur, sipping on my shake. "You two can go home, if you like. I'm waiting on Daiki." Kuroko smiles slightly at me.   

"I'll wait until Aomine-kun gets here. It's bad for girls to wait alone at night." Relief fills my chest and I smile gratefully at him. I don't like being alone at night, especially surrounded by strangers.   

"Thanks."   

" _How long have you been in Japan?"_ Kagami's sudden English surprises me, and it shows, but I smile wider.   

" _Since seventh grade, so about three years."_ I reply.   

" _What're you doing out here? Is your family here with you?"_ I shake my head.   

_"My family is still in America. I was here in middle school on a sports scholarship and to study abroad, and I've just kept studying abroad I guess. As long as I pass the American exams like I should, it's okay for me to be here."_ I reply easily, smiling at the interested redhead. _"Your English is great. Where did you learn it?"_

_"I lived in Los Angeles for a while for my dad's job before I moved back here. That's how I learned basketball."_

_"Seriously? That's great. I only learned basketball once I got here."_ Kagami looks surprised.   

"How did you learn so fast?" He replies. "You're still pretty new to this. Newer than Kise." I nod.   

"Unfortunately, I learn fast. I had some incentive to keep up and learn, though. Otherwise I probably would've stopped playing by now." Kagami looks suspicious, but it's Kuroko who speaks.   

"Why did you agree to learn basketball anyway?" He asks, looking at me calmly.   

"I wanted to get back at the softball coach for constantly putting me down. But after he learned I was actually training and showed up that day, what he said really made me angry. I don't want anyone to ever tell me I can't do something." I answer with a frown. "To constantly be used as a pawn, to be nothing more than a game piece and to be kept like a dog on a leash, constantly hearing 'no, you can't' and 'you're worthless' and 'you can't do it' isn't something I want anyone to experience, especially after hearing it myself. After a while, when I finally stopped playing because I was angry, I thought to myself 'wow, I really like this game. Let's play it some more. Let's see how far I can go.'"   

Kuroko is smiling faintly, but it's a smile nonetheless. "Oi, Alex." Daiki stands next to the booth, "You ready to go?"   

"Daiki! Yeah. Nice seeing you, Kuroko, Kagami." I practically bounce to the bluenette.  

"Haruna called." Daiki says. "You shoulda heard the surprise when I answered. She wanted to know if you were still up to practice in two days." I hum in response. 

"What did you tell her?" I ask, walking down the street side by side with him. Daiki gives me a smirk.   

"What I usually do." He drawls lazily.  

 "Before or after terrorizing her?" I reply. Daiki snickers. "After it is." I say with exasperation. "Honestly, Daiki, you're going to chase her away."   

Daiki laughs and swings an arm around my shoulders. "That's why you have me." He says with a snicker. I roll my eyes and jab him in the side with my elbow.   

"You don't play softball, Ahomine." I say with a snicker. "Until you do I still need those people." Daiki pouts.   

"Don't be like that." He says. "Honestly I don't see the point in you practicing at all." I attempt shrugging Daiki's arm off my shoulders. "I haven't seen you play since middle school graduation." I wince.   

"I haven't found a team I want to try out for." I reply. "The type of team you join is really important."   

"Just play for Touou. That's another reason Akashi sent you here. Basketball and softball were both interested in you." I glance away.   

"I don't want a coach like the last one." I say quietly. "That wasn't a good experience." Daiki stiffens.   

"I'm sure this one is fine." I glance away.   

"I can't do both, Daiki. It didn't work out well for me in middle school. One sport in school is enough." I mutter.   

"Sure, sure. That's what you said in seventh and eighth grade, but ya still did it." I sigh.   

"I didn't do it because it was fun." I snap, a scowl crossing my face. "I did it because I was expected to. My parents would've thrown a fit. My teammates would've hated me. What I did wasn't playing, Daiki. It was... isn't playing supposed to be fun?"   

Daiki sighs. "Now do you see what I mean?" He asks. "Nothing is fun unless you have someone to compete with."   

"Mm." I respond. I stop attempting to stray from Daiki and instead lean against him as the wind blows more harshly.


	6. Chapter 6

"Hai-chan, you're a little early for once!" Momoi says in surprise as I enter the gym, weary of her loud voice. I nod slightly. I'm usually just on time, neither early nor late. I glance around the gym. Members from the opposite team are just arriving. I can't read the kanji on their jerseys, but the blue and yellow theme is a bit distracting. Narrowing my eyes, I approach the pinkette.

"I don't have a jersey. What should I wear?" I ask.

Coach Harasawa makes his entrance, walking in with a bag in hand. "Here, I got your jersey. Momoi informed me of your interesting preference." I blink in surprise before glancing to Momoi.   

"We didn't know for sure if someone had this jersey, but found that no one had claimed it." Momoi says with a smile. "I still don't understand why you'd choose such an unlucky number." I open the bag to find my jersey, the number thirteen in big red numerals. A smirk cuts across my face.  

"That's okay. As long as this number is mine, I'll be the unluckiest thing to ever happen to the opposition." I reply, taking the bag. "Are the others in the locker room? I can change somewhere else..."   

"Actually, we wanted you to change first since the guys take a lot longer. Go ahead and change." I smiles hesitantly at Coach and Satsuki before walking into the locker room with my school bag. On go the black shorts, the red and black jersey, and up goes my hair. I leave my bangs as they are, letting my bobby pins cling desperately onto the neck of my jersey. I shrug on my basketball shoes, tie the laces, and put my school uniform into my backpack. I exit the locker room just as the others stream in.  

 "Hai-chan~! Come over here!" I hesitantly make my way over to the over-excited Momoi. "Do you see what I see?"   

_Weakness. Defeat. Anxiety._ "They have no spirit." I say suddenly, my eyes widening with shock. "N-None at all." _Anger. Irritation. Impatience._ "Are they even going to try?"   

"That's why I want you to grab their attention. I want them to focus on you so they try a little harder." I had wanted to be invisible for a while longer, but I don't have that option anymore. With a sigh, I adjust my body language completely.   

"A girl... a girl on their team?" A new bout of whispering consumes the other team as I adjust my ponytail.   

"That's a neat trick you have there." Imayoshi says suddenly from behind me. I look at him with a shrug.   

"It's easy. I can teach you later, if you're interested." I reply. "Basic body language."   

"You've almost outdone yourself." Momoi says pleasantly. "You've been practicing?" I glance away.  

"I got tired of being squished on the train." I reply.   

"Let's get back to the locker room." She says with a smile. "I have some things to discuss with you and the rest of the team."   

"Will Daiki show?" I ask, falling in stride with our manager. Momoi shakes her head with disappointment.   

"Dai-chan doesn't want to play. Normally, we'd play a different first or second string player to fill the gap, but since you're here, it's best to utilize your skills to our advantage." She answers. "Listen up!" The locker room falls silent as we walk in. Thankfully, it seems everyone aside from Daiki is present and completely changed. "Hai-chan will take Aomine-kun's place today. She's up to par with Aomine, so this shouldn't pose much of a challenge."  

"Why have a girl play?" hisses an indignant second-string player. "This is boys' basketball!" I offer him a bone-chilling glance as we make eye contact.  

"If you can beat me, you're more than welcome to take my place." I say flatly. Momoi and the first string players stare at me in shock. "Until then, you shouldn't talk. Maybe you should practice more." The pinkette shudders slightly.  

Nobody else has any complaints about my place on the court, and the first quarter begins without a hassle. In fact, most of the first quarter goes smoothly as I dash past slow players and receive passes from Wakamatsu and the others. Things go too smoothly. _They aren't even challenging us..._ A glance at the scoreboard surprises me as I snap back to attention. "Hai-chan, do it again!" Momoi yells. I adjust my body language again, watching as it distracts the screen on Sakurai enough for him to shoot a three-pointer. I continue to do this for the rest of the first quarter.

_This isn't fun... I thought it would be. I thought maybe I'd get on a team that would finally struggle! A team that would finally compete! Not one like this, not one that destroys the other team. I don't want to play on a team like this... would it have been different on Seirin?_   

Momoi stares in concern at the dark-haired teen, but doesn't address her. Instead, she turns her attention back to the rest of the players that will be sent back out onto the court. "Keep up what you've been doing in the first quarter. Hai-chan's influence will last for most of this quarter, but don't count on it completely. I need one of you to act as a trigger for me."   

"A trigger for what?" Wakamatsu replies, narrowing his eyes. The foreign student hasn't spoken a word during the game so far, a feat that the team hadn't known to be possible for the normally friendly girl. While it is obvious that she was deeply disturbed by something, the blond and the rest of the first-string players are clueless as to what it is.   

"I need one of you to trigger Hai-chan's Zone. Since no one on the other team seems capable of entering it, we'll have to use the second trigger. One of you will have to get either yourself or someone else to tell Hai-chan that it's impossible for her to do something that'll lead to our win." The pinkette glances at Alex in guilt. "I don't like using it, but this is the only other option we have."   

"Why do we need her in the Zone at all?" a second string player asks. His face is writ large with impatience. Unused to being benched, the second-year student is most certainly disgruntled. "If we keep doing this-"  

"If we keep doing this," Momoi interrupts, "things will not go quite according to plan. A comeback is certainly still possible. If you want a surefire win, you'll do this."    

"-chan... Hai-chan?" For a moment, I'm completely sure that Momoi is calling my name. "Alex!" Hearing my first name, though, without the usual honorific, startles me into awareness.   

I look up, startled. "Can you keep their attention for the first half of this quarter?" I sense the stares of the first-string players rather than turn and stare back at them. I turn my gaze to the court and nod a little, irritated that I zoned out. "Please continue to do so." I nod again before returning to the court with the rest of the players.   

The second quarter is uneventful, with the usual plays by Sakurai and Wakamatsu, Imayoshi and Susa. I avoid receiving the ball while I continue to grab attention. I'm trying to draw the others away from the team. "Touou's timeout!" I turn to look at Momoi in surprise before joining the others.   

"Hai-chan, are you okay?" Momoi asks, examining my face and coming altogether too close. "You're overworking that." This skill is technically a rip-off of Kuroko's Misdirection Overflow, only it lasts much longer on me since I'm not normally as invisible as he is. I scowl and pin her with a glare.   

"Okay, okay." She says sheepishly, pulling herself away. "No need to get angry." I huff and shift awkwardly from foot to foot, wishing that we weren't all huddled up like this.  

"If you're so grumpy, maybe you should get off the court." Imayoshi says suddenly. I glare daggers at the taller third year and nearly snarl at him. "It's obvious you aren't suited to basketball. You can't outdo us."   

"Four-eyes..." I hiss, almost lunging at him. "You're about to make the biggest mistake of your life." For a moment, the dark-haired point guard gives me a strange smile and I clench my hands into fists.   

"You can't outdo us. You can't even keep up." My vision tints red.   

"Like hell I can't!" I reply furiously. "Keep the ball coming my way and I'll show you. Momoi, I'm not going to use it anymore, so forget about it." I stare at the squinting eyes that hide behind glasses. "I'll make you eat your words."   

"Doubt it." He sings. I glare again.  

"Keep that up and I'll punch you." The rest of the game passes in such a blur that I can't remember most of it. What I can remember disgusts me, and when the buzzer sounds at the end of the game, I try my hardest not to look at the scoreboard. _195-22._

I'm furious. How could I let myself be manipulated like that again? How could I just forget about teamwork and not let the other team even have a chance to compete? Disgust washes over my features as I change out of my uniform and back into my usual attire. _It's Saturday, thank god. Where is Daiki? Probably at an arcade. Maybe I'll just go home and sleep. Daiki can let himself in. I wonder when his parents will take him back._

I walk out of the locker room and out the school, not waiting for the debrief that's sure to follow the game. "Hai-chan, where are you going?" Momoi calls, staring at me past the other players. I curl my lip in disgust.   

"Home. Where else? I did what you wanted. What else could you possibly want from me now?" My knuckles have gone white with the force of my grip on my backpack.   

"Hai-chan..." For a moment, Momoi looks hurt. "Don't be like that... it was for the team!"   

"You lied to me." I say flatly. "This really is just another Teiko. Bye, Momoi." I shove my way out of the gym and almost sprint off school grounds.   

_"I'll show you why you always need to win. Succeed or perish."_ My eyes widen slightly. Where's Daiki when you actually need him? _"Losing isn't an option for you. If you want to play, you'll play by my rules."_

Even Momoi would do.  

_"The point in winning is to crush your enemies. If you don't crush them, you haven't won."_ I want to go home. I want to hide under the covers. _"Want me to teach you what happens if you lose?"_

"Alex?" _I'm so gone._ Off I go, losing my backpack in an effort to run faster than normal. Where's the Zone when you need it? I just want to go home. I want to run and hide and never go to school again. I don't want to compete. I want to quit sports. I sprint home, ignoring traffic and nearly getting hit by cars and bikes four times when I forget that pedestrians aren't supposed to be crossing the intersection. Terror speeds me forward, faster and faster than I thought possible.   

"A... Alex! Stop running, dammit!" I only run faster at those words until I trip over the threshold of my apartment and fall face-first onto the floor. "Alex..." It's probably Daiki behind me, or Momoi or another Miracle. I slip into my bedroom and burrow under the thick blanket over my futon, shivering despite the heat outside.   

"Alex? What's wrong?"   

"What do you want?" I ask, starting to feel drowsy.   

"Kuroko saw you leave and wanted to chase after you, but he got caught up in something, so I came instead." I frown slightly.   

"Kagami?" The covers over my head can’t muffle my surprise. "You followed me?"   

"Yeah. I did." He says. "Are you feeling okay?"   

"Fine." I squeak. "Daiki will probably be back soon. I'm fine."   

"Why were you running?" I close my eyes.   

"Doesn't matter." I murmur. "It's fine." _Don't you dare let me down, Alex!_ I don't want to be alone, but I also don't want a near-stranger staying in my apartment.   

"Oi, Alex, you left your front door open!" Daiki calls, more than likely coming in and shutting the door simultaneously. When I don't answer, Daiki's footsteps pause. "Alex?"   

"In here." I call, burrowing further until I'm just a burrito of loneliness. The two aces are glaring daggers at each other as my head pops out of the top of my tunnel of cozy. "Daiki, meet Kagami Taiga. He plays for Seirin. Kagami, this is-"  

"Aomine Daiki." Daiki finishes, practically purring his name. "What are you doing here?"   

"Kuroko saw her run and had me go after her since he was caught up in something."   

"Satsuki." Daiki says with irritation. "How was the practice match?" This question is directed at me.   

"Horrible." I say, burrowing until my head is no longer visible.   

"Oh?"  

"We won." I say quietly. "We won and it was horrible. The looks on their faces... they didn't even fight it! They sat there and took it and gave up! That wasn't a game... that could never be a game..." I shudder. "When was the last time we played in a game? A real one?"   

Daiki doesn't answer. Instead, he nearly kicks Kagami out of the apartment with a message for Kuroko and sighs. "Do you see? There's no use practicing when all you do is get stronger. Nobody's going to fill the gap, Alex. It's already impossible." I close my eyes tightly.  

"I just want to compete. I haven't played a real game since I got here." I pop my head out in time to catch a strange expression crossing Daiki's face. "You _were_ right, Daiki. You were right and I really wish you weren't. I wish you were wrong. I wish you were so wrong that I was shocked."   

"Yeah." Daiki says. "I wish I was wrong, too." We sit in silence for a while. "Isn't your blanket suffocating you?" He finally asks.   

"Yes." I reply sheepishly. "But it's so warm!" Daiki tears off my blanket in an effort to keep me from completely suffocating. I gasp for air. "I'm hungry." I say, trying to breach the tense silence. "Daiki, make me foooood!"   

"No." He says flatly, blue eyes smirking. "Make it yourself, lazy."   

"But _Daiki_!" I whine, "I'm hungry!"  

"Sucks to be you." He snickers unsympathetically. I roll out of bed, barely managing to skirt around the tall boy. I punch his arm halfheartedly.   

"Nobody ever makes me food." I grumble. "You don't get any if I make it." Daiki's eyes widen momentarily before he smirks again. He knows me well enough to realize I always give him my food after an intense round of pleads and promised favors. 

I offer him a slight smile before stepping forward and nearly falling. I grab the doorframe immediately to try saving my face from crashing into the floor. "She made you use the Zone today?" Daiki hisses, pulling me upright.   

"It's not like she knows the consequences." I reply testily. My legs wobble. "I never _did_ tell her."   

"Akashi never let you use the Zone for long periods of time. Just how long were you in it?" I attempt to wriggle free of the bluenette’s gaze. It's nearly viselike, and sharper than any blade.   

"Maybe half a game?" I reply. "I lose track of time easily." Daiki groans and smacks the back of my head, which sends me teetering and him into a fit of apologies.   

"Sit down." Daiki says in irritation. I place myself on the couch, listening to him grumble in the kitchen.   

I like listening to the sounds of Daiki working. It's actually comforting. It reminds me that I'm not alone here. I doze off for a long time, sometimes caught between sleep and wakefulness.   

"Oi, baka..." he sits next to me. "I'm done. Let's eat." I give a hum in response, trying to tell him I'll get up in a minute. "Geez, sometimes I wonder how you ever took care of yourself in middle school." I snort slightly and pull myself into awareness.   

"Fooood." I groan, stretching as much as my stiff limbs will let me. "Thanks, Daiki." We eat in silence, something slightly unusual for the two of us. I'm too tired to start up any sort of conversation, and Daiki looks deep in thought.   

"I don't know when my parents will let me back in..." he says suddenly, startling me out of my mindless actions. I give him my full attention. "I know this place isn't really meant for two people, and I don't want to inconvenience you." I frown considerably.   

"Daiki, I don't mind you staying here. Actually, I like it. A lot. It's like I finally have someone to go home to." Our faces turn red and we both look away.   

"Idiot. Don't say embarrassing things like that!" Daiki says. I go back to eating. "But it's not like I don't understand what you mean."   

"I like it when you stay here." I say quietly. My face burns red afterward, but I don't retract my statement. I go back to eating my food in silence. My phone explodes into life beside me, making me nearly fall out of my chair. 

"Hello?" I answer, irritation dripping from my words. 

"Ah, Hai-chan! I ran into your brother today!" I freeze, gripping my chopsticks a little too tightly in my left hand. "He was on his way to the airport with your parents. He said to tell you something, but he said it in English and I don't understand it." 

Daiki gives me a strange glance as my teeth audibly grind against each other. "Go ahead and tell me what it is." 

" _You're never coming home._ "


	7. Chapter Seven

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A gentle reminder that PG-13 does encompass hints at sex and swearing. The latter is relevant to this chapter.

Momoi's words bounce around in my head for the better part of a minute as my chopsticks snap within my grasp. I drop my phone subconsciously and start swearing loudly in English, over and over until I'm yelling at the top of my lungs. "Oi, oi!" Daiki says, picking up my phone and trying to talk with a barely coherent Momoi. "What did you tell her, Satsuki?"

Her voice prattles off the phrase once again as I storm through the apartment, trying to vent without resorting to violence. My anger knows no bounds. The look in Daiki's eyes tells me that he also doesn't understand the meaning of my brother's words, but he still looks as pissed as I feel. He hangs up while I accidentally flip over the coffee table in the living room. "Calm down, you idiot! You're going to break something!" He says vehemently, looking torn.

"I'll calm down when I'm dead!" I hiss, pinning the tan player with a furious glare. "That brat! That brat and his sister and his mother and father!" I let out a yell of fury and go back to pacing, grinding out profanities once again.

"What did he tell you?" I let my gaze rake over Daiki furiously before my lip curls in cruel amusement.

"Like it really matters. I'll set him straight. I'll set all of them straight!" Really, I shouldn't be this angry, but I can't help it. What does a middle school student think he can do to keep me out of the country? What does he think he can do to keep me here? "Who do they think they are, giving Momoi messages? If they want to talk, they should say it to my face!" Shouldn't I be sad? Surprised? _Hurt. Angry. Frustrated. Annoyed. Irritated. Wounded._

"Alex, what did he say?" Daiki says. His voice is somehow lower than before, softer and gentler. His gaze is darker too, but instead of stone, it reminds me of a never-ending ocean. I blow my bangs out from over my eyes.

"It's fine." I mutter angrily. "It's fine. I'll calm down in a little bit." My pacing slows slightly. _He's kidding. That brat always liked to rile me up. It's not like he can actually do anything..._ I take a deep breath and sigh steadily.

"Look, you idiot, it's not good to bottle things up like that! Just tell me already!" Daiki replies, his face burning slightly. I blink in surprise.

"It's fi-"

"Like hell it is!"

"D-Daiki?" His eyes are dark, his expression grim. _Is he grinding his teeth?_

"It's really not fair..." Daiki's dark eyes rake over me passionately. "It's not fair that everybody's life sucks. It's not fair that my parents fight, and that your family corners you here. That I get kicked out, and that you can't get back home when you want to. I don't even do anything, and your family doesn't talk to you! So of course it matters!

"I'm sick of just watching you bite your tongue over and over and over again! How you swallow all this crap they send your way and you won't talk to anyone about it! Jesus, Alex, what's wrong with you?" Daiki's outburst surprises me, and for a moment, I almost feel scared. My body stiffens and freezes. "You just keep on taking all this stuff and you won't talk and you won't even fight back! How much do you think you can take?"

I open my mouth to say something, to say anything at all, but nothing comes out except for an unusually strangled noise. I bite my tongue and look down, unsure of what to do. I want to apologize, but I also want to yell. I want to stay, and I want to run. _What do I do?_

My chest constricts painfully before my mouth makes my decision for me. "What does it matter what I do, Daiki? What does it matter if I fight it or if I take it? It's all the same either way! It won't stop no matter what I do! I can't run away from it, and you can't get into a fistfight with a string of words, so what the hell am I supposed to do?" I reply sharply, trying to subdue my glaring. "Nobody asks for stuff like this!"

"Nobody's supposed to take stuff like this!" He replies in an equally sharp tone. "You're like a damn doormat! You just let everyone walk all over you!"

"What am I supposed to do, slap them and get sued? Get in a fight and get deported?" I hiss.

"Why don't you just get Japanese citizenship?" He says, throwing his hands up. "Then half your problems will disappear!"

"I can't do that without _their_ help! Unless I'm somehow put up for adoption and then naturalized, there's no way I can do that!" I reply testily. "I can't _make_ someone disown me or put me up for adoption, so let it go!" I huff in irritation, grinding my teeth. "I've already looked this stuff up before. There isn't anything I can do until I'm twenty."

The look on Daiki's face is pretty priceless. "You've actually thought of this stuff?" He asks, frowning. I nod with irritation.

"Of course I have. Otherwise I would've moved back by now. There's no need for me to stay here if I don't like living here." I sit down on the coach unceremoniously and stare at the upturned coffee table. _I should probably fix that... maybe later._ Daiki huffs and sits down next to me.

"Idiot." he says flatly, looking straight ahead.

"Stubborn." I huff back, glaring at the floor.

On Monday, when school starts up again, Daiki drags me to the gym even though neither of us have our practice clothes. I left mine by mistake; he left his on purpose. "Hai-chan!" Momoi calls in surprise, her voice resounding loudly. "What happened on Saturday? You sounded really angry!"

"That's because I _am_ angry!" I reply furiously, grinding my teeth.

"Don't you mean you _were_ angry?" She asks, tilting her head in confusion. I shake mine vehemently.

"I'm furious. I'm _still_ angry." I reply in a growl. "How did you even come across the brat?"

"The brat?" Momoi's eyes widen in confusion.

"Yes, the brat! He looks almost exactly like me, except male! The brat, my brother!" Momoi's eyes widen again.

"Hey, hey, don't yell." Daiki says, patting my head. I jab him violently in the side.

"He showed up after the match and-"

"Does he even speak Japanese?" I ask furiously. "God, why do I have to deal with these people?"

"He used a translator machine thing. He said he was leaving for the airport and to tell you that. He left me with these and said all the paperwork was done." A big orange envelope rests in Momoi's hands, and I recoil from her like she's the plague itself.

"I don't want to see it." I hiss furiously. "How did he even know I was going here? I haven't talked to any of them in months, and that was when I was still planning on Seirin." I take the envelope less than gracefully and rifle through the papers with irritation. _Notice of Disownment_ is typed neatly across the top of the paper. I rip through the envelope, my eyes wide and fearful as I read through the pretty, florid words and assorted documents. "Fuck!" An assortment of different swears tumble from my lips, half Japanese, half English. _Renouncement of Citizenship._

"That brat!" I thunder, dropping the papers. "I'll find him if it's the last thing I do!" The only thing keeping me from storming out the gym and hunting down a certain quartet of people is the pair that keeps me pinned to the wall as I yell more and more profanities. "I'll hunt him down! I'll teach him a lesson! I won't take any more of their shit!"

"Hey, what're these papers?" Sakurai asks, picking up the crumpled documents.

"Drop them or die!" I thunder at the shy boy, completely unapologetic. "Don't touch those fucking sheets of paper!" He promptly drops them, apologizing so vehemently and frequently that he runs out of breath and scurries away.

"Wow, you've got a set of lungs." Imayoshi says pleasantly. "And such a short temper~! I wonder what these papers are." His eyes widen slightly as he skims them. "Hm, I can't understand most of it. There are lots of complicated words they haven't taught us yet..." I rip myself free of Momoi and Daiki to snatch the papers out of his grip, crumbling them slightly in my furious grasp.

"They're none of your business, you nosy fucker!" I snarl. _Citizenship. Disownment. Expulsion._

"Hai-chan, what do those papers say?" Momoi asks gently. "I didn't mean to give you anything that would upset you so much." My lips curl slightly into a cruel, belittling snarl.

"The only people capable of doing this are _them."_ I hiss, shaking in rage. "You couldn't do this to me even if you _tried_." My blood is boiling over in rage. I feel like the embodiment of violence, unable to escape the use of my fists to harm another person. "I'll kill them." I growl, unable to tear myself free of the papers, reading them over and over even though their words are etched into my eyes, into my memory, scorched into the center of my chest.

"Give me these." Momoi says, prying my hand loose as Daiki drags me away to the far side of the gym.

"Calm down, Alex." Daiki says flatly, whacking the top of my head. I slap him in return, unable to contain my fury.

"Don't tell me to calm down!" I yell. "I'll do whatever I want!" He grabs my hands, still somehow calm, and narrows his eyes.

"What did they say?" A full ten minutes pass before I calm down. My insides feel completely empty, with just a burning coal of hatred residing inside. I shake again, but not from rage. _Despair._

"I don't know how they got it..." I murmur, pulling away so I can lean against the wall. I slide down and tug my knees to my chest. "How could they just do that? I mean, I understand that I wasn't really part of the family anymore, but we were bound by blood... don't blood ties mean anything?" I beg, looking up with pleading eyes. "Isn't family bound by the blood we share?" Daiki sighs.

"What did they do?" He asks, crouching in front of me.

"I got disowned." I say emptily. "Fucking _disowned_. I don't know how, but my citizenship was also renounced. I don't have a family. I don't even have a country to belong to!" I grab my hair and tug on it viciously. "Tell me it's a dream. Tell me it's a joke. Anything. Tell me anything. Lie to me. I don't care."

"Alex..." Daiki's voice is unusually soft. "Family isn't defined by the blood you share." I look up at him through my teary eyes, trying hard not to scream and cry. "Your family is made up of the people you let into your heart." I choke slightly, wishing I could hit someone. "Momoi!" Daiki goes over to talk to the pinkette as I clutch at my hair, tugging and biting my lip.

"U-Um..."

"I'm sorry I yelled at you." I say, looking up at Sakurai. "I'm really sorry. You don't have to forgive me. I... I'm just angry. It was wrong of me to take any of it out on you. I'm so, so sorry." Sakurai gives me this helpless look, his eyes wide.

"S-Sorry!" I laugh slightly.

"No, _I'm_ sorry, Sakurai. You don't need to apologize to me for anything." I sit there for a while, staring at Daiki and Satsuki talking to each other anxiously before I stand. "I'm going home. Please tell Imayoshi that I apologize for not practicing today... and for swearing at him. I'm not sorry for yelling at that four-eyed sadist." Sakurai gulps in a helpless fashion. "See ya."

Satsuki and Daiki's conversation stutters to a halt as I pick up the papers scattered on the floor along with the remnants of the formerly pristine orange envelope. Slipping the wrinkled papers into my backpack, I haul it over my shoulder and gulp anxiously. "I'm going home." I say quietly, avoiding the disgusting pity in Satsuki's eyes. "See you later."

The walk off school grounds takes so much longer than usual. It takes much less time to find Daiki walking beside me as I turn down the street. "I'm sorry." I say quietly. "Go do whatever you want."

Daiki remains unusually quiet beside me, saying nothing. For a while, I'm sure there's something wrong with Daiki. He's not normally this silent. I walk into my apartment in silence and change out of my school uniform. "Alex! Come with me. We're going somewhere." Daiki shouts.

He storms into my room as I'm tugging on my shirt. "Out, Daiki. This makes four times." The usual _umph_ and amused fury doesn't make it into my words. "Learn to knock."

"Good, you're dressed!" Daiki says. "Now, we're going." Daiki's hand roughly grabs my own and drags me out the door. He has a bat in one hand and my keys tangled around his long fingers.

"Daiki! Let me go, Daiki!" I say forcefully. "Daiki!" The blue-haired wonder doesn't respond at all as he drags me through the labyrinth of streets. Of course, it receives many strange stares.

How often does anyone see a tall Japanese boy with blue hair carrying a heavy softball bat while dragging a foreign student through the streets of Tokyo as she hisses, "Daiki, let go of me" to him? Hell, if it weren’t me being dragged across town, _I'd_ record this.

After another five minutes, I stop attempting resistance and let him lead me to wherever it is I'm going. Hopefully, smashing yakuzas' windshields. And no, I don't have a death wish. Smashing things amuses me as long as it doesn't hurt anyone.

"Daiki..." My voice finally bears notes of irritation.

"We're here." He says, dragging me into a tall building and up two flights of stairs.

"Hai-chan!" I start at the voice of someone I haven't seen in a long time. "Hai-chan, Hai-chan!" I stumble as Mizuki's arms are thrown around my neck.

"Mizuki?" My eyes are all sorts of wide and surprised. A familiar short figure, and a taller, lankier one wave behind her. "Haruna? Kagome?"

"Hai-chan, do you even use a phone anymore? All my calls go straight to voicemail!" Haruna whines sweetly. I struggle to smile.

"Ah, sorry. I lost the charger for a while and haven't checked my voicemail yet." I reply sheepishly. "My bad."

"We've been waiting for you." Kagome says with a smile. "It's your turn!" She points to the batting cage in front of her. "We all have our own and have gone a few rounds." I have to borrow a helmet, but with my bat and a grateful look at Daiki, I step in.

My time lasts for half an hour, the longest I've been in here for a while. My hitting isn't any worse than before, but it has much more _umph_ , more passion and violence and power to it than the last time I was here. _Daiki just gave me a way to vent... Daiki... have you always been like this?_ My chest constricts as soon as my time is up.

I owe Daiki for this. He gave me a way to vent violently. He gave me an opportunity to feel better, to release all my anger. What can I do to repay such a debt? Thoughts swirl in my head as I bid my former teammates goodbye and walk side by side with Daiki, my bat resting casually over my shoulder. "Do I look like a hoodlum like this?" I ask, referring to the fact that I'm carrying a bat. "'Cause I don't feel like getting arrested. Not now, not ever." Daiki laughs, a rough, charming noise that sets my fears at ease.

"Sure." He replies easily, arms shoved in his pockets. "You look terrifying. All 167 centimeters of you." I huff in mock annoyance, glaring at him playfully.

"It's not my fault I'm short. You're 192 centimeters for crying out loud! That's fricking tall!" I reply teasingly. It takes me a while to do that math in my head. _He's almost a foot taller than me... when did I get so short?!_ I smile vaguely in amusement, trying hard not to snicker at our height difference.

"Nah, it's pretty standard for basketball." Daiki says bluntly. I facepalm in irritation. "You're just short. You're lucky you've got good legs." Our faces both burn as we realize just how out of place that statement sounds. "A-Ah not that I-I've-"

"Of c-course you haven't-t-"

"I mean it's n-not like I-I"

"Yeah!"

"Yeah!" We both sweatdrop with a faint sense of relief as the moment passes.

"The way to a girl's heart is usually through flattery, you know~!" I say jokingly, bumping him with a faint smile.

"Really? I thought it was through buying her things." He replies in an equally teasing manner.

"No, no, first you buy her lots of shiny things, _then_ you drown her in flattery." I say cheekily.

"Oh~? But that doesn't always work." Daiki says with a roll of his eyes. "What do I do then?"

"Oh, you treat them like an animal in bed." I say, carefully choosing such misleading words. "Wrap them in a blanket, give them food, and pet them." Daiki stops and stares at me in shock before he guffaws. I chuckle in equal amusement.

"What if this person's more like a cat?" He snickers.

"Hm..." I reply, feigning my seriousness. "I suppose you could always just act like a normal person?" We stare at each other for a moment.

"Nope!" We say in unison, grinning.

"Ah, to find someone of equal weirdness." I say with a sigh. "Preferably one that will feed you. And cuddles. Cuddles are nice." Daiki snickers beside me, ruffling my hair. I swat his hand away lightheartedly. _Daiki always puts me in a good mood at the end of the day._


	8. Chapter Eight

"Alex, get up, ya lazy piece of-" Daiki's attempt at "peacefully" waking me ends as I toss my beloved pillow at him and go back to attempting sleep. "Alex..." He growls my name, replacing his formerly 'gentle' tone. I shiver slightly in response, closing my eyes tightly and hugging my futon for all I'm worth. Apparently, I'm not worth enough. Daiki carries me off the mattress. "Look." He says, pointing at me. "Food." The offending finger then points to a plateful of food. Suspicious, I search for my chopsticks, only to remember I snapped the last pair in a fit of anger.

"Um... chopsticks?" Daiki pauses mid-bite to stare at me as I rummage through the kitchen. "Broke them. Definitely not good. Buy another? Gotta have a spare _somewhere_." Daiki's over so often that he has a set of chopsticks just for himself, but I only have one set for me, and grind out my frustration as I look for any of the ones I pick up from fast-food joints.

In the end, I do find another set of chopsticks, although they're supposedly single-use only. Aomine Daiki is a surprisingly good cook. I mean, he's a total idiot 99% of the time, basketball aside, and he sleeps through class, but Daiki's no joke when it comes to food. _That boy sure can cook._ My tongue rejoices. I really like Daiki's cooking. It's some of the best I've ever had. The trouble is actually coercing him into cooking, and later, into cleaning up. Well, not exactly _coercing._ More like... _persuading_ him. I snicker slightly at the thought before gorging myself past hunger.

"You're going to sleep during class if you eat too much." Daiki notes offhandedly, on his second bowl of this semi-unrecognizable dish. I shrug.

"Isn't it supposed to be flattering if someone likes your food?" I reply with one eyebrow raised. "Either way, it doesn't really matter. I already know this lesson." He raises an eyebrow in slight disbelief.

"Yeah, but I don't, and I always use your notes." He replies. "You _know_ I can't take good notes and that I can't focus during class." A whine enters his voice, amusing me in his childishness.

"Then I suggest you learn, Daiki. In college, you do you expect to get any degree for work? You can probably get in using basketball, but how do you plan to study properly?" The bluenette stares at me in surprise before giving me a dunce-like smile.

"What're you talking about? You can take notes for me~!" He replies childishly. I roll my eyes.

"Aomine Daiki, you know full well that I'm not planning on pursuing the same line of work that you are." After playing more basketball, Daiki will probably want to be a cop. I'm not really into crime and such, although I fully appreciate the work that police do. I'm more into translation. Daiki smiles at me, startling me out of my thoughts.

"You could always translate for the police." He suggests, waving his chopsticks around. "International law or something like that." I laugh, my gaze softening.

"Yeah, maybe." I say, unwilling to dismiss his suggestion. "I'm probably no good with law, but... it seems interesting enough. Maybe. For now, I have more serious things to take care of."

Daiki and I sigh silently before I clean up after the two of us and get ready for school. "You know you don't have to go today." Daiki says as I lock the door behind us. I nod slightly.

"Yeah." I reply with a sigh. "I know... but I should probably go anyway. After all, you can't focus during class at all. You always sleep, you blockhead." Daiki laughs sheepishly as we walk in the increasingly frigid morning air. "Geez, how do you plan to graduate high school if neither Momoi nor I are in your classes?"

Daiki snorts. "They'll put one of you in my class." He replies flatly. "Otherwise they'll have to worry about my grades. They already know that either you or Satsuki always give me notes and help me study. I don't think they really care as long as you two are helping me."

I roll my eyes in response. "Geez, Daiki. That's really not the way to get through high school." I reply easily, watching the assortment of students file into school, all looking grumpy, sleepy, or disturbed in some matter. Unease eats away at my insides, chased by a sense of foreboding. Gnawing on my lower lip, I go to my locker and change my shoes for class before meeting up with Daiki again to go to class. 

School passes in a semi-terrifying blur. I take two sets of notes, copying my work during our breaks and throughout lunch. As usual, Daiki sleeps during most of our classes and doesn't bother to pay attention while he's awake, most likely daydreaming about his perfect opponent or going professional. I have more realistic dreams. I'll never be able to pro. Gender aside, I simply don't have the height that professionals do, although I can jump as high as they can. My short height puts me at a disadvantage.

"Oi, skip practice today." Daiki says flatly as I head toward the gym the first-string players usually play in. I blink in surprise.

"Why?" I respond, frowning considerably.

"It's no use for you to practice. You'll make your shots, and you always end up putting in 110%. The better you get, the wider the gap you make." He replies. My eyebrow twitches in irritation.

"Play one on one with me." I suggest, walking into the gym. "I'm itching to play you." Daiki stares at me in surprise as I grin at him playfully. "I'll give you a good game. Besides, when's the last time you actually got one of your shots in against me?"

Daiki's eyebrow twitches in irritation as I flounce into the locker room. I'm instantly met with Wakamatsu's girlish scream and fly out, my face red from lack of air as I howl with laughter. "Oh my god." I choke out to the blurry figure of Daiki. Tears of laughter stream down my cheeks. "You shoulda seen his face, dude! Like seriously! He turned so _red_."

"Stop laughing!" Wakamatsu screams through the door.

"I'll laugh about this until the day I die!" I scream back, hitting the door for emphasis. "Your scream, dude! You need to work on that!"

"Don't just randomly walk into a locker room full of guys!" He shrieks in return. I roar with laughter again.

"Dude, seriously, I can't believe you're that _shy_." When my laughter finally dies down, Wakamatsu dares to brave the outside world. I burst into laughter as he pierces me with a glare, sniggering violently as I try to stifle the noise I'm making.

"Seriously!" He whines, stomping childishly. His overdramatic eye-roll clues me in to his amusement.

"I can't wait to hear about what happens when this happens with you and your girlfriend or your wife." I snicker.

"You shoulda seen Sakurai!" Wakamatsu sniggers, his eyes crinkled in amusement. "He turned so many shades of red after you left and apologized a thousand times!" We snicker in the corner of the gym until Momoi smacks me with a paper fan.

"Don't be angry, Satsuki-chan~!" I whine playfully. "You know you find it funny, too!" Momoi only sighs in frustration, no doubt questioning my sanity for the umpteenth time.

"Sure, sure, Hai-chan." She replies patiently.

"C'mon, Daiki~!" I whine after leaving the pinkette and blond. "Play a game with me. _Against_ me." The bluenette takes a full twenty minutes to convince.

"Fine, fine, you child!" He finally exclaims. "But just one game! No more!" I nod enthusiastically before leaving to change into gym clothes. Daiki follows suit, no doubt having talked with Satsuki about something. When I reappear, the two are talking seriously, something unusual for the two childhood friends. I hum in interest before adjusting the brace around my ankle. I take my matches with Daiki very seriously. Playing against him requires me to put in most of my energy, and being concerned about the state of my body gets in the way of that. We usually play until one of us can't take any more.

"Ready to get beat?" Daiki hisses playfully, lacing up his shoes.

"As if I'll lose to an overly-tall boy with blue hair." I snort. "I'll lose when you pass a class on your own." Daiki laughs. I can't help but notice that the first-string players haven't started warming up for practice, but it doesn't bother me. "Satsuki, give me a basketball. A _good_ one."

Surprisingly, it's Susa and not Satsuki who does as I say, but I'm thankful nonetheless. "Streetball?" I ask with a malevolent grin. "Full court?"

"Nothing else is worth my time. First to score wins." Daiki replies, an equally vicious grin stretching across his face. I narrow my eyes. There's no way I'll lose to him. He'll have to give it his all. We have Imayoshi toss the ball up for us, and I jump as high as possible to snatch the ball out of the air. I barely manage to get it before Daiki does. His outrageously long arms are putting me at yet another disadvantage. I dash down the court, trying to keep Daiki off my back. _Not in the Zone yet? I'll still beat you!_

I almost make the shot, although Daiki somehow manages to steal it out of thin air. Furious, I keep pace with him, blocking his would-be lay-up and flying down the court as fast as possible. There's just the one thing I dislike about one-on-one. I can't call fouls on Daiki, and while the same applies to him, we both know the game stops as soon as one of us draws blood or collapses. He smashes into my back, and I slam into his side, vying for control of the ball. I nearly trip, he nearly stumbles. _I can't believe we're using violence so early on._

As soon as Daiki enters his Zone, mine slips over me with ease. One of the things I like best about Daiki is that he competes with every fiber in his body. He practically breathes just to beat others. I used to hate competition. Now, I'm dying for it. My mind instantly clears, and I can see everyone and everything. Every twitching of his muscles, every breath he takes, how long he can keep this up. Nothing is hidden from me. _Nothing can stop me!_

Daiki and I go head to head again, but this time the balance has been tipped. There's nothing he can do that I can't anticipate. My plans change as my plays improve. Daiki can't stop me, just as I can't stop him. For every shot he takes, I block. For every would-be basket, I'm met with his jump. I growl out furious groans and continue, sweat dripping down my face. _Ten minutes. 2/3 of a quarter, and I can win. I can beat Daiki._

I'm about to finally get my basket nine minutes later when Daiki slams into me. I can't tell if it was on purpose or by accident, but it knocks me flat onto my side with my ankle giving way in the most unforgiving way possible. A sickening jolt runs up my leg before a scream rips past my gritted teeth. I'm effectively thrust deeper into my Zone. My hands grip my ankle tightly. "Satsuki!" I yell. "Give me my tape. _Now._ " I can see the way she looks at me, that strange mixture of fear and pity, before giving me the roll of white athletic tape.

I wrap my ankle tightly, refusing the hand she extends to help me up, and instead throwing the tape straight into my bag by the sidelines from my place near the basket. My mind is going into overdrive, processing things instantaneously and categorizing them, using all my senses to map out what to do next. I take the ball from Daiki and work my way down the court aggressively. _Twenty seconds and I will have maxed him out!_ Somehow, in the midst of Daiki's intense playing and the weakness in my legs, I manage to dunk the ball in.

Unfortunately, due to my significant lack of height, I have to hang onto the hoop in order to balance myself out for my fall. I land on one foot rather than two, and cringe as soon as I stand. Daiki and I have a serious staring contest as soon as he catches my gaze. "I never did like that Zone of yours." I grit my teeth.

"Yours is friggin' scary." I hiss in response. "Jesus, Daiki." We're awkwardly quiet for a few minutes. "Dude, can you carry me? My ankle isn't working."

Daiki's eyes go comically wide for a moment. "How many times have I told you to pay attention to that damn leg of yours? You're going to break it, I swear!" He rants for the better part of ten minutes. "How stupid do you have to be not to realize tha-"

"My ankle hurts because I've been standing so long." I say flatly, interrupting the livid boy. "Carry me." Daiki's face slowly reddens with irritation before he somehow manages to calm down.

"Of all the ways to..." He sighs and bites off the end of his sentence. "Yeah, yeah, I'll carry you." I give a whoop of excitement. Daiki's piggyback rides are seriously awesome! He's super comfy. Tall people are the best at carrying others, in my opinion.

"It's not like I _want_ it to stop working." I reply evenly, remembering the rather ruthless shove I'd received only a few minutes earlier. "There are things beyond my control, too." Daiki stops for a moment as we near my backpack.

"Oi, don't tell me that I pushed you again..." I don't say anything in response to his half-finished sentence, instead reaching over his shoulder to pat Satsuki on the head.

"Dude, you're so small from here! I wish I was always this tall!" I exclaim giddily. Satsuki looks up at me with big pink eyes. "Do you always look this cute? Geez, I'm surprised you aren't dating anyone right now." The pinkette's eyes swim with mirth before Daiki lets me down gently.

"I got you some ice." Satsuki says more seriously. "Let me take a look at it." I instantly stiffen and straighten.

"It's fine. No worse that what I've gotten before. All I need is a little ice." I say, trying my hardest not to look at Daiki. I smile slightly. "I'm hungry~! Satsuki-chaaaan, do you have any bento? I forgot mine..."

"No, sorry, Hai-chan." I sit down and pull my backpack closer to me, trying to chat more amiably.

"It's totally fine. Hey, if I'm calling you Satsuki, you can at least drop the '-chan', ya know? You can call me Alex if you want to." I reply, rifling through my backpack anxiously. "Where did I put it...? I swear it was in here..." My backpack is entirely devoid of any of my extra braces and usual wraps.

"You're looking for this?" I grow rigid at Daiki's low voice. Looking up, I can see one of my many braces dangling from his fingers. "Aren't you already wearing a brace?" My lips thin into a flat, unamused line.

"Daiki, please give me my brace." I don't notice how gingerly Satsuki wraps the ice around my ankle, or how Wakamatsu's voice lowers. I pretend to ignore Imayoshi's softening expression and Sakurai's pitying glance. "Daiki."

"You think you can keep playing like that? You're going to break your leg!" Daiki says flatly, his eyes narrowed. I surge forward, trying not to stumble.

"Give it to me, Daiki." I hiss, hand outstretched. "You're making me angry."

"You're going to wreck that leg of yours until you can't play any sports!"

"I hit that point last year!" I yell furiously. "Remember that month I didn't show up at school? That was me spending all my time in P.T., trying to walk properly!" Daiki recoils. "And that time over the summer where I didn't practice? I was getting more braces and learning how to properly wrap this stupid leg so I could finally do _something_!"

Daiki is dead silent. "I'm back, and I can play just as well as before." I hiss. "Give me my goddamn brace so I don't have to crawl home, Daiki."

"Why don't you just quit?" He finally asks. I freeze. I can't move, even if I want to. My heart stutters and blood roars in my ears.

"Quit?" I ask, tilting my head jerkily. "Quit. Sorry, I don't know that word. All that word leads to is being stuck in the past. Quit? How cute." I snatch the brace out of his hands. "I'll quit when I'm dead." I shove the brace on roughly under the ice, cringing at the pain it causes me and cursing my unruly temper.

"Alex... I didn't mean it like that." I growl in irritation.

"Then what _did_ you mean, Aomine?" Daiki cringes. When he doesn't speak, I pick up my backpack and walk home. "See you tomorrow, Satsuki." I don't make it all that far, to be honest. As soon as I get past the classrooms, my vision blurs. It stings and leaves trails of moisture dripping down my face as I slide down the wall.

"Alex..." _Why don't you just quit?_

"Why?" I reply. "Why would you ever ask me that? Why would you ask me to _quit_?"

"I really didn't mean it like that." Daiki sighs, sitting next to me. "Although I doubt either of us would mind if you would quit crying right now." I laugh slightly, wiping at my eyes.

"Yeah, you're right." I reply, sniffing slightly.

"I didn't mean quit as in you stop playing. I know you wouldn't willingly do that... although your ankle would probably feel better." I give Daiki a warning as I narrow my eyes. "I meant quit as in... Playing the way you do. You just let people abuse you whenever you play." I shrug.

"Maybe I'm a masochist." I reply flatly, my lips curving slightly. We sit in silence for a while longer.

"C'mon, shortie. I'm carrying you home." Daiki announces.

"Wa... really?"


	9. Chapter Nine

"Hai-chan." I jolt upward, startled out of my half-sleep on a park bench. I suppose it really is rather dangerous for me to sleep out here, but Daiki's annoying and Satsuki won't stop talking. Forgetting to look for the voice that startled me out of my sleep, I lie down again and attempt resting once more. "Hai-chan." My eyebrow twitches in annoyance.

"Yeeeesss?" I reply, hoping my annoyance drips like venom.

"It's dangerous to sleep on park benches." I crack one eye open, and low and behold, there's Kuroko, staring at me with his usual placid expression.

"What's your point?" I reply, shifting away from him. "I already know that." Kuroko sighs, a long, drawn out, exasperated sound.

"Hai-chan, don't be difficult." My eye opens again at that statement.

"You're as painfully blunt as ever." I say with irritation.

"You're just as lazy." My eyebrow twitches once more. Silence follows, and I naïvely assume that Kuroko has walked away. He has not, and I only come to realize this when he pokes me forcefully in the ribs. I squeal and fall off the bench.

"How cruel!" I whine pathetically, attempting to tug at his near-nonexistent heartstrings. "Kuroko-kun that hurt!" Kuroko simply looks at me flatly. "Fine, fine, Kuroko. I get it."

"Why are you here anyway?" Kuroko asks as I pull myself upright and walk side by side with the short bluenette.

"Ah, Satsuki and Daiki won't stop talking to me. This was the only place I could think of where I could hide for a bit." I reply calmly. "And you? It's unlike you to simply walk through this park." Kuroko is quiet.

"I wanted some peace. Things are busy at school." I nod for a few moments, gazing around placidly. The days, admittedly, are shortening drastically, but the sky is still pretty light. Trees are rustling softly and a gentle wind blows my hair about sweetly. I sigh softly.

"Back home we don't have a variety of seasons like Japan does." I say suddenly, watching colors stretch across the dusking sky. Kuroko looks at me in surprise. "I mean, the rest of the country probably does, but my hometown doesn't. It's always sunny and fairly warm. Boring."

"It sounds pleasant." Kuroko says quietly. I laugh slightly in response.

"Yeah, sometimes. It meant I could play sports year-round outdoors, but it also meant that almost every day was always the same routine. There is such a thing as too much of a good thing." I reply quietly.

"You're talkative today."

"Just with you." We lapse into a more comfortable silence as street lights flicker on, casting strange shadows across the pavement as people walk by. "Ah, I'll part ways with you here. See ya, Kuroko." I reply, a hand raised in farewell.

"You too, Hai-chan." He responds, nodding. I turn down the street and walk past the usual bustling shops, listening to the laughter that surrounds me. Sometimes I can catch glimpses of conversations I don't fully understand, and other times I catch simply single words. I sigh silently. _I still have a long way to go before I'm fluent, huh?_

Without a second thought, I walk into the nearest convenience store and buy at least an armful of sweets, along with a week's worth of bentos for both Daiki and I. My wallet stings by the time I leave, but the minty-fresh gum in my mouth fixes everything. Well... almost everything. Worry runs through my blood like currents in the ocean. I try to ignore it. _Drowning won't help anything._

"Where've you been?" Daiki asks the instant I walk through the front door. He practically shoots up from the couch, moving faster than usual as he approaches me.

"Oh, I'm doing well, Daiki. And you?" I respond, shifting my hold on the relatively heavy plastic bags. "It's chilly outside. I wish I'd brought a jacket."

"I spent two hours looking for you!" Daiki hisses irritably, grabbing a few bags from me. His fingers are frigid as they graze over mine. "You didn't answer your phone! Where were you?" I blink at the unusually annoyed bluenette.

"I went to clear my head." I reply coolly. "It didn't work as well as I'd hoped."

"Why did you buy all this?" Daiki asks with a rough sigh, sounding unusually surly.

"I find it irritating to make bentos all the time, so I bought some so I'd have a bit of a break." Daiki falls silent as he helps me place the bento inside the fridge.

"I can always crash somewhere else, Alex..." He starts. I cut him off abruptly with a sharp glance.

"I'm not telling you to leave, Daiki. That isn't what I meant." I respond, blowing hair out of my eyes. "I don't usually make food. When you're at home and it's just me, I always end up ordering take-out or eating at Maiji Burger or something. It's a nice change of pace to actually make food, even if it's usually pretty simple.”

"Besides," I add, glancing at the taller bluenette, "I like helping my friends. You're my friend... aren't you? I don't turn my back on my friends... Especially..." I frown suddenly glancing around. "Where's my candy?"

"Oh, you mean these?" Daiki drawls, lazily picking up the bag and raising it over my head.

"Yep. Gimme~!" I reply, jumping pathetically in an effort to grab the bag from his long arms. "Candy, candy!"

"Didn't you get these for Atsushi? There are quite a few of them, hm?" I jump higher, my fingers brushing the bottom of the bag ever so slightly.

"I like candy!" I reply "They're mine, although I was thinking of sharing until this happened." Daiki gives me a sinister grin as I jump a little bit higher.

"Sweet, sour, salty, but never spicy or bitter, huh?" Daiki grins manically. "What happens when you eat spicy food?" He leans forward as an unidentifiable expression spreads across his face. I'm about to reply when he pops something ridiculously spicy _and_ bitter into my open mouth. My jaws snap shut instantly. My quest for sweets is dropped as I surge forward, rushing for some water before attempting to spit out whatever the hell this is.

"No, you don't." Daiki says, clamping his hand over my mouth firmly. My burning mouth is momentarily forgotten as surprise floods my body. Then the burning heat and strong surge of bitterness comes surging back and I lunch forward. "This is my revenge. I had to go and look for you. You weren't answering your phone, and I had no idea where you were." I attempt to bite Daiki's hand, but my jaw refuses to work.

With my eyes watering, I continue to try to spit out this food from Hell. It doesn't really work since my mouth can't open properly. It's too big to swallow like a pill, and even if I wanted to, I can't swallow pills dry. I gag on the bitterness, and my mouth waters from the heat. Eventually, the stupid thing is small enough to swallow and I down it, feeling it scorch my throat on its way down to my roiling stomach. Daiki's grip loosens, and I turn on the tap as fast as I can before drinking greedily from it, trying to sort the disgust coating my tongue. My eyes are burning intensely enough for tears to form, but not fall.

"Aomine Daiki..." I growl, turning to glare at him. It's then that I realize we're hardly a few inches from each other. I take as much of a step back as the space between the sink and me will allow, but it isn't much. The bluenette looks at me with this unidentifiable expression. My mouth is burning still, but it's been subdued to a mild burn that I can ignore for a while longer. "...Daiki?"

Daiki's gaze is unusually potent right now. Dark and angry and worried and confused and maybe even a little bit scared. For a moment, all the different emotions in his eyes leave me absolutely breathless. "That was kind of cruel." I say quietly, trying to read his reaction. Daiki's gaze changes ever so slightly, but I can't tell how.

"Next time, don't let m- us worry like that." Daiki says lowly. I nod my head absentmindedly and drop my gaze, my mind racing through a million different thoughts. Luckily, a loud knocking at my door rudely interrupts our semi-awkward silence. It takes some agility to escape my cramped space between Daiki and the sink to reach the door.

"Who's there?" I ask, pausing just behind the door.

"Hai-chan! You're back!" My door flies open and whacks me in the face forcefully. I stumble backward and clutch my painful nose. "Hai-chan?"

"Satsuki." I groan, raising my head to look her in the eye. "Did you ever think that I was maybe, perhaps, right at the door?" Venom practically smothers my speech as I rub my face awkwardly.

"Did I hit you again?" She asks desperately, her eyes comically wide. I respond with a glare. Her eyes widen even further -something that should be impossible- once my hands leave my face. "Y-Y-Your nose!" I glare further.

"What about my nose?" I hiss angrily. Pain pulsates across my face. "Ow... ow, ow ow ow..." My hands fly up to cradle my nose once more. "Geez, Satsuki! How on earth did you pack so much punch into opening a door?"

"Your nose is bleeding!" Satsuki finally exclaims, as I taste iron on my lips.

"Is that so?" I reply flatly, a growl rising in my throat. My temper raises its rather hideous head as I stumble to the kitchen. The pain radiating across my nose and cheekbones makes tears form in my eyes.

"Satsuki? Alex?" Daiki pops his head out of the kitchen as I run into the edge of an end table and drop several serious swears.

"Ice pack." I croak hoarsely as Satsuki hovers helplessly about me, worrying enough for the two of us. "Ice. Need ice." Daiki doesn't hesitate to grab a dishtowel and one of my many ice packs.

"Here." He says gruffly, practically shoving them into my hands. I place the ice gingerly over my still-bleeding nose and flinch at the coolness that combats the heat of my face. "How did you manage this one?"

"I slammed the door open and she was right behind it!" Satsuki says in a huge rush of breath. "Oh no, should we take you to a clinic? Is it broken? Does it hurt? Do you need more ice? Can you breathe? Is it swollen?"

"It hurts like hell!" I reply sharply, "And no, I can't breathe. I don't know if it's broken, and this much ice is pushing my limits already!"

"H-Hai-chan..." Satsuki says gently. I try my hardest not to glare at the worried pinkette.

"Look, I don't know what to do. I'm not good with facial injuries if they're on my own face." I pull away the ice. "What do you recommend?"

"We're going." She says instantly. "Daiki-"

"You broke it. You take her." He says instantly. My head pounds painfully. The two continue to bicker for another ten minutes. When they show no signs of stopping, I pull out my phone.

" _Hello_?"

"Imayoshi? It's Hai. Can you take me to a clinic?" The two childhood friends are yelling now.

 _"Is that_ -"

"Satsuki and Daiki."

" _Right. I'll be there in a few_." Imayoshi hangs up quickly. The feeling in my face is surging in and out of existence where the ice pack is.

True to his word, Imayoshi only takes a few minutes to show up. Mindful of the door, I grab a jacket and slam the door shut behind me to announce my departure. With the way Satsuki and Daiki are fighting, they probably didn't even hear it.

"Why are they fighting?" Imayoshi asks suddenly.

"Satsuki wants me to go to a clinic. Daiki doesn't want to take me." I reply hoarsely.

"For? You sound and look like shit, by the way."

"We think Satsuki broke my nose." I reply tersely. "And thank you. You really brightened up my day. Hooray."

"Hope you don't mind some company." Imayoshi says. Wakamatsu and Sakurai are downstairs, leaning in the doorway of my apartment building. I press my ice pack a little more firmly to my nose.

"Doesn't matter to me." I reply flatly.

"H-Hai-san! There's blood on your shirt!" Sakurai exclaims.

"My nose is bleeding." I reply easily.

"Then what's the use of the ice pack?" Wakamatsu asks. I bite back a stiff growl.

"To reduce swelling." I answer with irritation.

"Did you break your nose?" I swear that boy only knows how to yell.

"I don't know yet." I snarl. "Excuse my bad mood. My face hurts like a bitch and two of my closest friends, one of whom is responsible for this, are too busy yelling to even tell me which direction the nearest clinic is. I'm not a good conversational partner right now." Wakamatsu opens his damn mouth again only to silence himself after wicked glares given by both Imayoshi and me.

I get dizzy halfway to the clinic and unfortunately have Wakamatsu, the loud-mouthed buffoon, carry me the rest of the way. I can't really recall if they ran after that since I start to become a little out of it. I end up filling out some paperwork about my medical history, but much of the kanji is unfamiliar and I keep bleeding on the paper by accident. Sakurai fills the paper out for me as the nearest nurse gives me something to slow the bleeding.

It takes us a long time for me to finally see a doctor. He's a rather disgruntled looking man with comically slanted eyes. The boys are somehow allowed in the room with us. "Let's take a look." The doctor says with a sigh, a frown creasing his otherwise calm face. I pull away the ice pack and whatever the hell this bandage like stuff is. His eyes widen comically.

"What did you do, get in a fight and have the shit beaten out of you?" The good man exclaims in a panic.

"My friend slammed a door into my face by accident." I reply drowsily. "She's very excitable."

The man tugs on a pair of rubber or latex gloves and nears me. They smell faintly of rubber. "I'm going to feel the area. Tell me if it hurts." I wince when he feels about my cheekbones, but it isn't too bad. It's another story when he actually touches my nose. I cry out and swat his hand away, covering my nose as I lean forward.

I don't quite hear what he says after that since my eyes are stinging and my nose won't stop stabbing me with daggers of pain. "Look, sweetie, did you get into a fight?" The man asks yet again. I shake my head once more.

"I told you! My friend accidentally hit me with a door!" I reply in a strained voice.

"I need you to sit up, okay? You said you have difficulty breathing, and your nose is still bleeding. I need to check the inside." It takes all my willpower to allow the doctor to examine my nose again. Lots of words begin to pass over my head again, so the doctor addresses Imayoshi and the other two starters instead of me in rapid Japanese.

After a few minutes, the doctor, who has turned out to be very gentle indeed, spreads an unusually icy gel over my nose and under my eyes. I hiss at the temperature difference and nearly flinch. Then, without warning, he realigns my nose. I yelp in surprise and pain as he does so, my eyes watering violently.

I'm given a pill that I down without questioning and allow the doctor to place enough gauze in my nose to crush all hope of breathing. Then he places this bandage-like brace over the bridge of my nose. Surprisingly, it isn't bulky and terribly ugly. He gives me another ice pack, hands me a lollipop, and addresses Imayoshi whilst giving the captain some slip of paper.

"Can we go home?" I ask sleepily, stifling a yawn before sticking the lollipop in my mouth. It's very sweet, probably some sort of cherry or strawberry.

"In a little bit." Imayoshi replies as we approach the waiting room once again. "We're waiting for some medicine."

"I wanna go home." I respond, sinking into the uncomfortable chairs once more. "Sleepy."

"You're rather childish, aren't you?" He sounds amused.

"Well your personality seems to be suffering greatly for all your maturity." I sound irritated. My phone rings. "Hello?" I sound sort of drunk, to be honest.

" _Alex! Where are you_?"

"Huh? Daiki?"

 _"Alex, tell me where you are!_ " I yawn sleepily.

"I'm with Imayoshi and Wakamatsu and Sakurai." I answer, sinking lower. "I'm sleepy."

 _"Alex, are you in a clinic_?"

"Yeah. Imayoshi says we're waiting for some medicine." I respond.

" _Let me talk to him_." I offer Imayoshi my phone.

"Daiki wants to talk to you." I say as he raises an eyebrow.

"I would've thought your phone would be more girly." Wakamatsu comments as Imayoshi takes my phone. I shrug.

"I don't really have a need for girly things." Imayoshi's conversation sounds rather barbed, but that's the only thing I can tell from his tone of voice. I don't brother trying to understand any of his actual words. It's too much work right now.

"Imayoshi." Wakamatsu says after a few minutes. "They just called us over the loudspeaker."

Imayoshi hangs up and gives me my phone after a few more moments. "Hai, stay here with Sakurai." I nod and look at the apologetic brunette beside me.

"Sorry to have dragged you guys out here." I say when the duo returns. "I didn't mean to ruin your night like this."

"It's fine." Imayoshi says with a sigh. "It probably would've been worse if Aomine and Momoi took you, or if you hadn't gone at all." I nod slightly and fail to suppress a yawn.

I do walk part of the way home, I promise. Unfortunately, it's only about a block or so. Wakamatsu offers to carry me the rest of the way, and I let him. Between the warmth of his back and the streaking lights about us, I end up dozing off several times, much to my chagrin. We reach my apartment after another fifteen minutes.

"Alex!" Satsuki practically explodes from my apartment building, almost slamming the door into my face yet again. My eyes widen before Imayoshi stops the door.

"Satsuki..." I say, trying to control my temper. "Have you learned nothing?" The pinkette flushes in embarrassment.

"So what was wrong with your nose?" She opens the door much more reasonably.

"Oh it's definitely broken." Imayoshi says pleasantly. "He realigned it and prescribed some pain medication."

"What about basketball?" I ask, tugging on the edge of his shirt.

"No practice for a few days." I release a sigh of relief.

"There's another practice game in a few days." Satsuki murmurs. "We'd like you to play."

I grin slightly. "Then why don't we plan on me playing? I'll tell you beforehand if I don't feel up to it." Satsuki looks at me dubiously before nodding.

"I _am_ sorry about your nose." She replies.

"Yeah, I am, too." I mutter, glancing away. "I'm tired. Thanks for going with me, guys." Satsuki opens the doors little wider so I can slip past her. I'm sure that Daiki has left or gone to sleep, but am somehow pleasantly surprised. He stands in the doorway, arms crossed, a frown marring his face.

"You could've said something." Daiki says after a few heartbeats. His eyes look kind of dangerous.

"You were yelling and wouldn't have heard me." I reply easily. "Besides, it's done." Daiki grumbles something I don't quite catch before Satsuki bounces up to us.

"Ah, Imayoshi left me with the doctor's orders and your meds. You took one there, right?" I nod.

"I think it makes me drowsy." I murmur, pushing past Daiki.

"It says here that it'll make you sleepy. I'll notify your teachers, okay? Take them directly before you eat, and only with water. Come to practice like usual, but you can watch or nap or whatever, okay?" Satsuki sounds a lot like an older sister.

"Yeah, yeah." I mutter. "I wanna sleep."

"Eat dinner first. There are some leftovers in the fridge. I'll reheat some." Daiki sounds unusually compliant.

"But sleep..."

"Eat and then you can sleep."

"...Fine." I comply, but only because Daiki's being pushy. I slouch at the counter that serves as my table and rest my head on the cool surface.

"Hai-chan, I'll leave your meds on the counter by your toaster. See you!" I groan a reply and lapse into silence. Eventually, I begin to nod off into dreamland.

"Alex." I crack open on eye. "If you don't eat this, I'll steal your food for the next week."

"Hurry up." I whine childishly, flopping backward. "Hungry. Sleepy." Daiki only laughs before my food is placed before me. The take-out teriyaki we'd had last night lies before me. "Yum." I say with a grin. "This is food." I have to fend off Daiki's chopsticks a couple times when he takes more than a few bites of my food, but I end up laughing each time he takes food faster than I can snatch it back. _Daiki..._


	10. Chapter Ten

My face feels pretty swell after I ice it and take some much needed pain pills. The swelling has gone down a bit, but apparently still needs some serious icing. Unfortunately, my thoughts on drowsy pain pills remain the same. They're a bane to my existence. I struggle to take notes since teachers' voices somehow gain the ability to lull me into a sleepy stupor if I'm not extra careful. I sigh for the umpteenth time during history and give the board a baleful glare. I really need a nap. _Seriously._ At least I have a doctor's note for P.E., so I can probably sleep during that class, and directly after finishing my lunch.   

Apparently the responsibility of keeping me awake and semi-functional during class has fallen onto Daiki's shoulders. There could literally be no worse choice for that matter. Have you seen him? I swear he sleep during each and every minute of class, only to wake up for breaks and snacks. At least he doesn't snore. _That_ would be humiliating. Daiki's having plenty of fun doing this, though. Each time I show signs of sleeping, he tosses a ball of paper at my head or pokes me in the back with a very sharp, very sneaky pencil. Luckily, I was somehow granted a total of five minutes of sleep when the teacher went on a tangent about daimyos or something.   

The bell for lunch rings loud enough to wake me out of my path down _I-wish-I-was-sleeping_ lane. The effectiveness of the pain pills had worn off about ten minutes ago, and I don't have an ice pack with me. Daiki stabs me with a pencil when I don't show any signs of movement. "Ouch, Daiki! I get it!" I hiss as students start to file out of the classroom. I get my stuff together and glance back at him. "Where do you want to eat lunch? In here?" Satsuki, who flounces in here without a care in the world, somehow makes our decision.   

"Let's eat on the rooftop!" The pinkette says excitedly. I feel a bit surprised that Satsuki would suggest the roof, but it's an interesting idea, so I agree to it. Daiki, apparently, could not care less. I grab my bento and a nasty white pill along with my water bottle before Satsuki practically drags me out the door and up several flights of stairs.   

The air is rather blissfully cool up here, but I know that the usual weather will return with a vengeance as summer sets in sooner or later. We take a seat along the fenced rooftop and bicker a bit about why I apparently get the better seat in the corner while Daiki has to "suffer" with the single fence behind him. I offer him no answer and simply open my bento, my mouth already watering. Just as I'm about to eat, Daiki takes away both my food and my chopsticks. "Wha-" My hopes and dreams crumble slightly as I recall the doctor's instructions. "Yeah, yeah, I get it." Down the pill goes, bitter and a little powdery, with a large mouthful of water in its wake. "Food, food, food!" I take back what's mine and start eating.   

I get through about half my bento before my stomach decides enough is enough and that this food is too good for me. I consume no more, more than a bit irritated at my upset stomach. Several gulps of water don't help, and I look at my pleading bento sadly. I drop into sleep before I have a chance to try shoving a few more mouthfuls down my throat.   

I don't know how much time passes, but apparently it's "enough." Satsuki has to shake me for several minutes to get me to wake up properly. I'm not pleased that my sleep has been disturbed, but I contain my temper since we all know that it's necessary. "You didn't finish your bento." Satsuki notes as I close the scavenged container.   

"I lost my appetite. Maybe I should go looking for it." I say with a sigh. I throw the box away with a semi-wistful expression. "Is it time for class?"  

 "Hm? Yeah, but I can't wake Dai-chan." I blink in surprise.   

"Well, he did keep me awake all morning. I can't really say I'm surprised." I reply tiredly. "I don't think either of us will make it through the afternoon." Satsuki smiles at me with her chime-like laughter.   

"Might as well wake him up so he can get to class." She responds with an amused smile. We spend another few minutes waking Daiki from his slumber. Daiki's a lot like a panther, I think. He has this aura of a wild animal, this ridiculously intense presence that minimizes mine and everyone else around him. He stretches like a cat, too. Slow and sure and somehow incredibly relaxed, but still predatory in every way possible. I really don't know how it's possible.   

"Class already?" He asks drowsily, blue eyes still clouded with sleep.   

"Yep." I reply quietly. "Up for keeping me awake for another couple hours?" Daiki groans audibly and sighs.   

"You should just sleep through class like I do." He says roughly. I sigh.  

"Then we'll both fail all our classes and I won't get a job and I'll fail and you'll be responsible for me for the rest of my life that's a big responsibility you up for it?" The words all come out in a big rush. I would never knowingly say something like this. "Wow, meds really pack a punch." I say hurriedly. "Better get to class!" Satsuki disappeared the moment Daiki started stretching, so it's just us on the rooftop. Daiki stares at me openly and shamelessly for a few minutes.   

Our staring contest lasts until the warning bell, when we both jump with a start and fly down the halls into our seats. Now that everything is more settled, my face reddens slightly at the words that somehow slipped from my mouth earlier. _How could I say that?_

The rest of the day passes with Daiki poking me awake and my notes switching from Japanese to English so it's easier for me to write. My phone explodes to life, vibrating furiously the moment the teacher leaves the room, so I'm saved that tragedy. I answer it on my way down to the gym. "Hello?"  

" _Do... you speak English?"_ I frown intensely.   

" _Yes. Who is this?"_ Satsuki, who is directly beside me as I open the doors to the gym, frowns up a storm at my rough voice.   

" _Ah. It's... It's me."_ The nervous male voice on the other end of the phone doesn't sound familiar.   

" _Could you be more specific?"_ I reply, a scowl marring my face. " _I don't recognize your voice or your number."_

 _"I suppose it's been a while. My name's Josh."_ I stiffen with remarkable speed.   

 _"Josh. It's been a couple years."_ Satsuki comes to interrupt me, but I hold a hand up. _"What do you want?"_

 _"Your friend, the redhead, gave me this number after I asked him for it. I heard about what you did- how do you think we felt when we learned about that?"_ I leave the gym immediately, heading for a courtyard.   

 _"What I did? What is that, exactly?"_ Poison drips from my tongue as I shift my weight.   

 _"You suddenly decided to stay in Japan, forever! Your family's been going on and on about how you won't speak to them and how your change of heart was so sudden. Honestly, why would you ever leave this place for Japan?"_ I choke on my anger.   

" _If you'll bother listening to me, you'll know that I didn't choose to do so. I was suddenly mailed something about renouncement of citizenship and being disowned. I have nothing to do with that group of people over where you are."_

_"You're lying..."_

_"I'm not."_ My lip curls in disgust. _"Goodbye, Josh."_ I hang up before the boy has another chance to say something that'll irritate me further and walk back to the gym back as calmly as I can.   

"Who was that?" Satsuki asks curiously as I slip my phone into my backpack. I almost don't answer the cheerful pinkette.  

"That was Josh." I reply easily. "The one who visited in my second year at Teiko." Her eyes widen slightly.   

"Oh. What did he want from you?" My lip curls in disgust once more.   

"Nothing important." I reply flatly. "He just wanted to say hello." Satsuki gives me an uncertain frown before she sighs.  

"You don't have to be here, if you don't want to." She says calmly. I smile slightly.   

"I wouldn't show up for something I could avoid." I reply with a softening expression. "I don't mind showing up to practice. I'm just unhappy that I can't practice properly." There are many more things that I'm unhappy about, but now is not the time to dwell on them. I'll save that for late nights and takeout when I can't escape myself.   

There's this raised edge to the gym, hinting that it doubles as an auditorium or at least as something for storage. That's where I make my new abode, doing a bit of homework while I keep my eye on practice. I'd take basketball over homework any day. The boys take a break halfway through practice and get something to eat or drink. I continue working on my homework for a few minutes more.   

Eventually, I put the schoolwork away and take out an especially squishy softball, throwing it easily against the wall well above Sakurai's head and catching it casually as it bounces back to me. "The softball team was really disappointed." Satsuki says as she sits beside me. "Said you were wasting your talent." I smile wanly.   

"I dislike conflicts in my schedule. That would require me to prioritize." Imayoshi stifles laughter beside Sakurai as I raise an eyebrow at him threateningly. "Besides, they'd have to move around existing players and give me control of most team plays. Both the coaches and the players would dislike that."  

"Oh?" Satsuki says. I nod.   

"I'm a first year and a foreigner. It would hurt their flimsy pride." I grind out. "Plus, I can't say I miss getting injured every game. I could do without dislocating joints and getting bruised and cut by idiots who can't see beyond the next play." Satsuki frowns.   

"Sometimes you really remind me of Aomine." I toss a smirk in the pinkette's direction.   

"What Daiki is in basketball, I am in softball. It's just the way things are." I reply flatly, continuing to toss and catch. "I learned to play right handed after a few years."  

"I thought you were right handed." Satsuki says with a rather serious frown. I toss the ball with my left hand, catching it just as easily despite the doubled speed.   

"I'm right handed when I want to be. I like being a lefty more, but then things get easy."   

"That explains why you always look like you're going to eat left handed." Daiki says, stealing some squid-shaped sausage from Sakurai's bento.   

"Don't take other peoples' food." I reply flatly, throwing the ball at him left handed. The bluenette barely manages to duck in time. I catch the ball again and resume my previous routine. "If you keep staring, I'll guarantee you'll get hit this time. I never miss." Daiki and I lock gazes for a few tense moments before he huffs and glances away. I go back to throwing.   

Wakamatsu must really have some sort of death wish. He goes directly from being relaxed to lecturing Daiki in less than a minute. I'm surprised he doesn't get Daiki's reasoning, but the blond did strike me as a bit slow. "Violence is unnecessary here." I say coolly as Wakamatsu receives a knee to the gut. "Cut that out, Daiki. He's your teammate." My softball pegs the bluenette squarely in the back of the head before bouncing back. I get a glare in return.   

"I don't need teammates." He snarls.   

"Well you have them anyway. Happy birthday, merry Christmas, happy new year, Valentines Day, Easter, and Fourth of July." I reply frostily. "People are not here to be abused."  

"I always hated it when you used eyes like his." Daiki grumbles. "That one's an Emperor, but you're a demon." An unhappy, rather angry smirk cuts across my face to hide the way I almost wince.   

"Go elsewhere before I really lose my temper." I say with a glare. "Don't abuse other human beings." A wicked grin threatens to cut across my face once more as I continue bouncing my softball. "Besides, it's not like I don't understand your point. I feel the same way." Daiki and I exchange knowing looks before I go back to bouncing a bit faster. "I'm hungry." 

My swift change in moods used to throw Daiki off, but he's come to just accept them. Apparently I go from  _Wow-I-want-cuddles-and-hugs-and-food_ to  _I-am-the-dark-lord-Satan_  and back pretty rapidly. I don't have the heart to tell him about the third  _I'm-fangirling-so-hard-right-now_ that happens when I watch anime. Fortunately, my moods still throw Satsuki off sometimes, and my new teammates. I laugh at their astounded faces and continue bouncing at a relaxed pace. 

"It's your fault for not finishing that bento you ate earlier." Daiki snorts, picking up his skin mag. I hadn't noticed it earlier, but I glance away as soon as I do.

"Yeah, well I lost my appetite then. I can't really force myself to eat when I end up sleeping." I reply languidly. "Was it you who finished off that bento?" Daiki shrugs. 

"Coulda been Satsuki." 

"Satsuki asks."

"Coulda asked. You were sleeping."

"Like hell it was Satsuki!" I reply with pseudo anger. A more genuine cracks across my face slightly as I accidentally release the ball a bit too late. Imayoshi freezes as my softball passes just a hair before his glasses. I laugh slightly before examining Daiki. "You're taking off, right? I'm out of soy sauce and if you could get some beef I'd be suuuuuper grateful!" Daiki raises an eyebrow. " _Pretty please?"_

"Fine, fine." He says, glancing away. If I didn't know any better, I'd say he looks a bit flushed.

"Oh! Hamburger buns! Pretty pleeeeease! I'll pay you back!" Daiki sighs and walks out. Satsuki looks at me in surprise. 

"That was actually rather impressive." Imayoshi says after a few minutes. "I didn't know that was actually humanly possible." I blink.

"What? Getting Daiki to buy things? Nah, that much is easy. The hard part is getting him to wake up in the morning without kicking him off his futon." I reply. Imayoshi stares at me. "He stays over frequently. I don't see how it's surprising." His mouth forms this incredible "O" of astonishment, then of realization. 

"Hai-chan, you're way too adjusted to Daiki." Satsuki says pityingly. A strange look suddenly crosses her face and stays there as the pinkette examines me from head to toe. Then she grins wickedly. "I ship it." I blink in surprise.

"Wha- No, no, no, Satsuki! We're seriously only friends! Don't you think I'd know if it was any other way?" I reply hastily as I slide away from the overly clever manager. "Geez..." I rub the back of my neck for a few moments. 

"You're incredibly slow on the uptake." Satsuki says with big, pink eyes. My temper flashes across my face.

"I'm fairly intelligent, thank you. This  _is_ my third language." I say with great irritation. Satsuki gives me a strange look. 

"You're trilingual?" She practically screeches. 

"Yes." I reply flatly. "It's been fairly helpful, actually. Also very confusing." 

"Wait, if this isn't your second language, what is?" Pink eyes much too close to me. 

"Ah, Chinese." I reply, trying to get a bit more personal space. "Mandarin Chinese." Wide pink eyes, unblinking in their examination of me.

"So you're really taking that dream of yours seriously?" She asks easily, leaning back now. 

"What's the use in having it if I don't have something to chase after?" I reply flatly. "It isn't supposed to be impossible, you know. It just takes a lot of hard work." 

"I think your academics are making your understanding of relationships and flirting suffer terribly." Satsuki says as the rest of the team gets back to practice. I raise an eyebrow in mock amusement. "You really don't get it." I roll my eyes once more and stretch. 

"Tell me about the next practice game, Satsuki. I'm interested. Who might we be playing?" For once, Satsuki is rather unhappy in her response. 

"Before you say anything, know that I tried my hardest to get us out of it. In the end, it wasn't my choice." My eyes narrow in suspicion. I have a faint idea of whom we might be playing, and if I'm correct, it'll be messy. 

"It's  _them,_ isn't it?" I reply flatly, trying to control my tone so Satsuki doesn't think my anger is directed at her. The pinkette only nods miserably. I sigh loudly, blowing my bangs out of my eyes. "That's really unfortunate." 

"Yeah." She says dejectedly. I clap my hands together.

"Don't tell Daiki we're playing." I say firmly as the coach approaches us. "Let him skip this game. I'll play for him." 

"Alex!" 

"I'm small, so I can get away faster. You should know better than anyone that I know how to take a beating." I reply evenly. "I can handle this. If the team suffers, I'll change the way I'm playing. We won't use the Zone or any of my observation until it becomes necessary. Hopefully, until the second half. We both know what he's famous for. He's smart..." 

"Alex, what you're asking for is really dangerous! I can't morally form a strategy around that." I narrow my eyes. 

"Think of it as a personal favor. I'm sorry, Satsuki, but if you want to limit the injuries here, you'll have to hand this one over to me." Satsuki looks a bit upset. 

"You're going to get yourself sent to a hospital." She says vehemently, shaking me back and forth forcefully. 

"It's nothing I can't handle. Do you remember how I played in Teiko for the softball team? Give me some faith, and I'll play like that for you. I'm not you, so it won't be as good, but I can bring you a win." 

"I don't want to!" Satsuki says hopelessly. I give her a tight smile. 

"You don't have a choice." 


	11. Chapter Eleven

I can't remember the last time I was nervous for any sort of sport. I can't recall how long ago it was that I couldn't eat, couldn't breathe, and couldn’t speak properly. I can't remember when the last time I'd gotten this unnerved was, or how long it lasted. I can't remember the feeling of worrying about defeat. I can't remember how to cope with my anxiety right now. "Alex, are you okay?" My head is resting firmly in my hands. I'm half afraid that it'll fall off from all the spinning thoughts that reside in the murky depths of my mind.

"Yes." I reply in not-so-fluent Japanese. "Perfectly fine." My heart is thundering. My blood is racing. I don't want to lose this match, no matter what. I also don't want my teammates to suffer, and I don't want to recall what it's like to become a human punching bag once more. So why is it, with just a few minutes until the start of the game, that I'm shaking like a leaf? Why do I feel dizzy and worried? Why am I toying with the idea of running away? This team isn't better than we are. This team is inferior in every way possible. My chest constricts as I draw in a sudden breath.

"Alex, your Japanese is seriously suffering." Imayoshi says beside me as I begin assessing the other team more seriously. My mind is speeding at a million miles per hour.

"Too bad." I say with another anxious sigh. "You remember what we talked about?" The captain sighs and nods. "Remember to tell me if it comes to that."

"I don't like that you're doing this." Satsuki says anxiously beside me. However scared she may be, it isn't as bad as how I feel. "How did you get Aomine-kun to not come?" I snort.

"That didn't take any effort. I told him that this team was weak, and that I was only going so I could practice dunks." I say as I collect myself. Now isn't the time to be afraid. Now is the time to pull myself together and remember that I'm good at what I do. "Daiki went right back to sleep. He won't wake until the game is nearly over, so he shouldn't even show."

My hands curl into fists as my fingers shake. "I hope nobody gets shipped off." I mutter. I've always hated underhanded playing, even though I've tolerated it from other teams. "Anyway, no matter what happens, don't take me off the court if you can help it. If I get an injury, slap a Band-Aid or a brace on that bad boy and we'll be good to go." I look at Satsuki more firmly. "I'm dead serious, Satsuki. Only take me off if I break something. Bruises and bleeding don't matter to me."

"Fine." Satsuki says tightly. "But remember what you promised. We're using _those_ in the second half." I frown as I watch the other team practice. I take a few deep breaths and nod confidently. I can feel my anxiety melting away as I get my head set on straight. I adjust my ponytail and take the bobby pins that are clinging hopefully onto my shirt into my hand.

"This seems like single bobby pin problem." I say firmly, clipping my bangs to the side. "Wouldn't you say so, Satsuki?"

"I'd give it a two." She says. I don't see the other team's coach, and frown.

"That sounds a bit generous." I say, pulling my bangs free and pinning them out of my face with two bobby pins. "But it sounds about right for what I'm going to do." Wakamatsu gives me a strange look as I stretch my arms out. "Man, I miss my softball. I feel like bouncing something until the game starts."

It's more than a bit surprising to find Imayoshi messing with my softball as he tosses it in the air and watches it bounce. "This isn't what you guys usually play with, right?" He says, tossing it back to me. I catch it with a smirk.

"Nah. This one's really bouncy, like a tennis ball. I wanted to be able to throw it against something and have it bounce back to me without too much trouble." I reply with a grin, bouncing it against the ground. "I had to adjust the weight, though. Filled it with some sand and such." For a moment, Imayoshi almost looks impressed. Then he just goes back to his usual, smug expression. I toss the ball absentmindedly as I study the other team a bit more.

"You have their stats, right? You can assign marks and such. Don't give any plays. Let us play at will." I say after a few more minutes. "I don't want anything given away if we can help it." Satsuki gives a noise of affirmation as a wicked grin splits across my face. "I hope we crush them." Something unfamiliar boils in my chest as I glance back to Satsuki.

"Well," she says with a tired sigh, "they didn't tease you the way they did for nothing, you know."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Wakamatsu nearly bellows. He really doesn't know how to use his 'inside voice'.

"The Chinese believe in dragons." I say with a wicked look on my face. "You all believe in demons."

"Both teams, please have your players line up!" I sigh, adjust my ponytail once more, and give Satsuki an uneasy glance which we both share for a few heartbeats. Then my game face slides on with practiced ease. _To have to go against this guy right from the get-go... This will be harder than I let on. Let's hope nobody gets sent to the hospital today._

My eyes glide over the power guard as I stand opposite him, ready for tipoff as the familiar boy grins down at me. "Been a while, Hai-chan." I stifle a snarl of fury as I get ready for the jump.

"Not long enough, Hanamiya." I reply back evenly, narrowing.

"How does your ankle feel? Sore?" A smirk curls my lip cruelly.

"Better than ever." I reply with a grin.

"Never did like it when you smiled." I bounce up to snatch the ball from thin air and dart past Hanamiya and his longhaired friend. It takes a few moments for Sakurai to catch up, but he shoots a three-pointer in my stead. I turn in time to see Imayoshi receive a strong jab to the rib, and Sakurai a particularly hard stomp on the foot. My temper flares slightly.

It takes all my concentration just to play for myself, dodging stray elbows and particularly volatile knees. It takes all my concentration to ignore the grunts of pain I'm hearing. This will continue, I'm sure, but my ability to ignore it won't. I'm already seeing everything, wondering absentmindedly how I can wreak havoc as I shoot a two-pointer and avoid a blow to the head. My anger is rising slowly, but I'm able to keep it down for now. "How does it feel to know that they're taking blows for you?" Hanamiya says as I screen him.

I don't answer him, and receive a jab to the neck before darting to steal the ball. My fingers are itching to strangle Hanamiya by the time the first quarter is done. My next job during our two-minute break is to assess how everyone is fairing. It's about as well as I had expected. The boys aren't used to such rough play, and Sakurai and Imayoshi seem to be targeted the most so far. I grit my teeth. "Calm down, Alex." Satsuki says as I glance at Hanamiya. "If you lose your temper, it all goes down the drain."

"I'll have to adjust the way I play again." I say, running scenarios through my head. "But I can't cover everyone very well." I glance at Satsuki. "I need their attention. Do something that'll grab at least Hanamiya's attention. I want him to think I've lost my temper already." Apparently, the pinkette was already thinking along the same lines. She doesn't need to be told twice, but my temper almost comes through at her actions.

Pain explodes in my cheek as my head turns, the sharp noise of a slap echoing through my head. I glare at the floor when I turn back. "That was harder than I anticipated." I say, gritting my teeth and covering my surprised expression with anger.

"Sorry, but it did get Hanamiya's attention. He looks rather happy." I gulp down some water.

"Now I just need to catch _all_ of his attention." I say, rubbing my sore cheek. "You can't lose your temper. It'll make you rely on simple plays, and he can read those without any effort at all." Imayoshi and Sakurai look pretty bad. "I can get them off your back, but if I do so, you cannot complain whatsoever. Complain and I'll personally whoop your ass."

"You're not-"

"I am." I reply coolly. "Don't you remember?" A sly grin cuts across my face for a fraction of a second. "Don't get angry and don't complain." The two-minute break is over in just a few more heartbeats as my teammates stare at me with unreadable expressions.

It doesn't take long for my will to take effect. Double screens are difficult even for me, but it gets worse when I get blows from both sides and feel like crumpling. My temper won't let me fall, and my patience will only let me endure. I break free after a few more moments to aid in a pass before I get clipped rather forcefully in the back of my head. Over the next few minutes, my ribs receive rather forceful blows, and my knees and ankles are threatening to buckle. My head is tender to the touch when I rub the back of my head. My temper is wearing thin, but I promised to keep it contained, so I do so.

Hanamiya is a sadistic bastard. He has no reason to guide his teammates for a triple screen, something that shouldn't even be necessary with the way the others are playing, but he does so anyway. I don't know how much longer I can take the unnecessary punishment, but I keep my lips sealed and my temper buried under years of self-control. It takes me forever to get open again, and when I start to play more aggressively, Sakurai receives more blows than necessary. I go back to the way I'd played earlier in the quarter.

"Touou's time out!" The ref calls as I'm trapped in another double screen. I get hit in the back of the head as I get back to my team.

"Alex, if you continue to play like this, you'll completely destroy yourself. I know I said I'd trust you on this, but look at you!" I give the pinkette a blank stare. I notice vaguely that we're about the same height.

"It's going as predicted. There's no need to change anything until the end of the quarter." I reply flatly. My chest is starting to ache slightly, and pain is shooting up and down my limbs. "If we can keep our tempers in check, the game will be ours." Satsuki grits her teeth at my statement before grabbing my shoulder. Without thinking, I swat her hand away and step back. "Please don't touch me."

"Alex..." Satsuki grits her teeth once more as I give her a hard stare back, warning her to remain silent. "What would Daiki tell you?"

"I don't care." I hiss in return. "Let this continue. There's only another five minutes. I've had worse." Just like that, I somehow manage to convince Satsuki that she won't change my mind no matter what she tells me. My lip curls in dissatisfaction as I glance at the score. _We need more._ "If you guys can score more, I'll keep a couple of them in check."

Five minutes pass in excruciating laziness as I manage to keep three of the other team's players screening me. There's only five seconds left when one of them topples over on me, driving their elbow into my face as I'm crushed beneath them. I can't really recall whom it was who fell, other than a pair of dead eyes, but once the quarter ends, they still aren't up, and I'm dying to catch my breath. It takes Wakamatsu to finally shove him off as I gasp for breath and roll to the side, coughing up a storm.

It takes me a while longer to collect myself and stand unsteadily, my gaze locked with Hanamiya's. He's finally sealed his fate, and looks completely surprised when a rather roguish expression cross my face once I start to laugh, grinning rather toothily as I make my way back to the bench. "First half for data collection." I say with an impish expression once I sit down. "Second half to put their plan into effect."

"You're crazy, aren't you?" Wakamatsu says. "A masochist?" I give him a scathing glare.

"No, although they're both possibilities." I reply with a sigh. "Satsuki, have you come to your decision?" Satsuki looks more conflicted than I've ever seen her. "I can take it, if that's what you're worried about."

"But... he's the one who..."

"Yes, he is." I reply flatly, risking a glare. "But I am not in middle school, and I am not scared anymore. Last time that happened because I lost my temper and walked right into what I had coming. This time is different. I'm not scared of underhanded playing, and I am more than capable of bearing pain." My lips curve into a smile. "If he thinks he can squish me, he should already know I have a tenacious will."

"Very well. Can you continue as you are for the third quarter?" I nod firmly, drinking some water and wiping my face of sweat. "Please do so. We will save _that_ for the fourth quarter."

"Do we get to know what's going on?" Susa asks suddenly. "I mean, you're covered in bruises and you're still planning on playing?"

"I once played a nine inning softball game at catcher with a dislocated shoulder. I've gotten kicked with metal spikes and stepped on more times than I can count." I say firmly. "This is nothing I can't take. Don't underestimate me, please. The fourth quarter will bring them hell." I crack my knuckles.

"Then I suppose we'll finally get to see the Demon in action." Imayoshi muses, his eyes slanting slightly with interest. "Although you have a rather roundabout way of wreaking havoc."

"If you're going to lead someone on, it's best to do it properly." I reply easily, smirking. "For now, please score as much as you can. I can keep them busy for another ten minutes for you."

"Let's bandage what we can, then." Coach Harasawa has been unusually silent, allowing Satsuki and I to dictate the game as we wish. "You're of no use if you can't move." We ice the back of my head for as long as we can as my knees are taped and any little scrapes are cleaned. The third quarter starts after another six minutes, and I do my best to occupy the court with as much presence as possible, drawing Dead Eyes, Long Hair, and Carrot Top in the process.

I can absolutely promise you that elbows are the bane of my existence, right after pain medicine and metal cleats and a certain softball coach. Several whack me continuously as I search for ways to keep their attention. It doesn't take much. I'm pretty sure that all I need to do is breathe and they'll try gutting me with their elbows. Several times I wonder what will happen if I throw up on the court. It takes all my patience to remember not to hit them back and to not go after the ball.

After a few minutes, I have to escape the triple screen to avoid throwing up only to get squished by Hanamiya. I can't even begin to describe the sudden agony that flared from my ankle up as it jerked one way and then another as the taller male fell atop me. I have to force him off me as I tug my ankle a safe distance from him, grabbing it as tears blur my vision. "Time out!"

"Hai-chan!" Sakurai shakes me slightly as I curl into myself. "Hai-chan, are you okay?" I almost sob after hearing that.

"Brace." I squeak, fending off the urge to wail. "Satsuki knows where it is. I want both. _Now._ " I wipe my face before standing jerkily and trying my hardest not to cry again. "Satsuki!" I raise my voice to catch her attention and hold up two fingers. Her eyes widen before she dives into my bag and has Imayoshi practically toss me over his shoulder to get me to the bench.

It's already swelling when I take off my shoe, so I dunk it into some ice water and then slip it over my ankle. My second, more rigid brace, is one that I don't use often. It doesn't really inhibit my playing ability, but I don't normally need something like that. A trainer from the school tries to look at my ankle, but I tell them not quite so politely to buzz off. "Satsuki." I say quietly, rising to my feet. "It's now or never." I look at my teammates. "Sorry, but you'll have to fend for yourself for the rest of the game."

"Don't kill them." Satsuki says wearily. I crack a furious grin.

"No promises. I want to _crush_ them." I reply.

"Doubt you can." She jabs not so subtly. It does the trick either way, so I don't really care.

"Watch me." I say with a grin. "He's ideal prey." Two pain pills and I'm good as new, ready to work. Now all I have to do is not spill too much blood.


	12. Chapter Twelve

Hanamiya looks irritated when I walk onto the court once more. My lips curve into a hungry smile at his fury. "You should wear that expression more often." I say pleasantly. "It suits you _perfectly_." He drops several swears as I near, narrowing his eyes.  "I will crush you." He replies in a much more strained tone of voice.   

"Nobody can crush me." I reply with an eerie, chipper voice. "Welcome to Hell, Hanamiya Makoto. Allow me to show Kirisaki Daiichi what it means to mess with demons." He steps back, narrowing his eyes as the game resumes once more.   

_"Hanamiya likes passing. He can steal them." Satsuki says firmly. "The key to our success relies on us not passing much. That means we'll have to place all our faith in our individual playing ability."_

_"If he can't get the ball from you, and they don't touch you, you're almost good to go. Our playing ability is better than theirs. Individually, their skill is somewhat lacking. That's why they rely on Hanamiya so heavily. He dictates who to take out to better their odds, and then makes the other team angry so that they rely on simple, easy-to-read plays that he can easily intercept." I supply, looking at my four teammates seriously._

_"I did hear that a certain group of middle school students had a rather scary demon they liked to use." Imayoshi says with amusement. "Would you happen to know such a demon?" My lips curve into a smile as I glance away._

_"Isn't it natural for an Emperor to have some sort of power to command besides his own?" I reply deviously. "After all, it's no fun to do your own dirty work."_

The ball will always fall into my hands. I can see everything, and I see all the pieces falling into place as I dodge and scurry past the other players, jumping as high as possible and managing a three-pointer. A grin coats the bottom portion of my face. "Hai-chan! Lefty!"  

 "This'll be easy." I say with an indulgent grin. My mouth itches to say something, but I bite my tongue slightly. _If you have something to say, say it through basketball._ My playing style does a 180 as I shift to playing left-handed. _I haven't played like this in a long, long time. Ready to bleed all those points you somehow managed?_

The third quarter passes in a blur as I assess, adapt, and get the advantage. It doesn't take much to push Hanamiya's buttons, and hopefully I've pressed all the ones I can. _105-58._ We get another two-minute break. "Do you still want me playing left-handed?" I ask as I talk with Satsuki on the bench, watching, assessing Kirisaki Daiichi. Satsuki barely suppresses a grin.   

"Of course, Alex." She says craftily. "Didn't you want to crush them?" I snort.  

"I want to triple their score, but I doubt there's enough time left for that." I say with a sigh. "I may just have to shoot for doubling it with a few extra points for good measure. I mean, the guy's smart. Evil, but smart." His foul mood will only lead to more mistakes. "Do you think it's demeaning to take advantage of his bad mood? I mean, it's only going to get worse. Might as well use it."   

"I think he already knows you've been holding back all game. I don't see them winning." Satsuki murmurs. My lips quirk into another smile.  

"Imayoshi, should we double or triple the score?" I ask boredly. "I want it to sting, but I also want them to come back so I can crush them again."   

"You're a sadist, that's what you are." Wakamatsu says. I smile brightly.   

"Only for these guys." I reply cheerily. "They've really pissed me off. No amount of points is really going to soothe that." I remain silent for a while longer, waiting to get back into the game so I can finally crush the bejeesus out of this team.   

 _Thirty seconds to go. They won't catch up. What should I do?_ Some little, moral part of me tells me to let them at least have a go, but the rest of me screams a most definite "crush them." I decide to mess with these guys a bit more. I pass to Sakurai, watching as he gives me this cute little smile and shoots a buzzer beater. We line up after a while longer. _164-58._

"Not quite triple, huh?" I say with a sigh as we head back to the locker room. I go into one of the bathroom stalls to change so I don't have to wait for the guys to finish. I exit the locker room quickly, grateful it's a Saturday, and say goodbye to Satsuki and Coach Harasawa before heading home. _I'm glad Daiki didn't show. He'd probably yell at me._ My phone rings, and since I know this is Daiki, I answer. "Hello?"  

 "Your game over? I'm on my way to get you." I smile to myself.  

"Just finished. I'll wait for you outside the gym." I reply, scanning the street. "Hey, Daik-" I don't have a chance to finish my sentence. My phone is knocked most violently from my hand and I drop my gym bag as someone who _really should not still be here_ glares balefully at me.   

"You! People like you sicken me. I want to _crush_ you." Hanamiya's dark eyes are unusually angry, angrier than I've ever seen anyone. "I had it planned. _I had everything planned!_ " I step back only to find the wall directly behind me. I see no immediate escape routes.   

"Look, what do you want?" I hiss defensively, trying to find some distance to put between us.   "I want to crush you. Geniuses and prodigies don't matter once they break. They're just trash afterward." I grit my teeth at those words. "Obviously you learned nothing from last time. I can make you useless..."   

All air explodes from my lungs as pain makes my stomach implode. I gasp for air, eyes wide and looking to escape. My knees buckle after pain blossoms in my stomach once more. I didn't expect to get hit, or kicked, or to watch everything turn blurry as I try to protect my head. "Oi!" I could cry from hearing that one word. I really could. Things continue to dim for a while longer as I gasp for air and wish most vehemently that I hadn't been born. "You get away from her!"   

As sudden as the abuse began, it stops and I crumple completely, sobbing. "What's going on out here?" I tune most of what follows out, most of which is yelling and someone running away.   

"Hai-chan...." I shove the nearest body away from me, wishing I could bring my legs to move me so I can just run from everything. "Alex?" I do try to calm down, I promise. I try very, very hard to calm down and stop crying and pull myself together, but nothing works, no matter what I do or try. All I hear is more murmuring, my name, and Satsuki's girly voice.   

" _Alex._ " Why is it always my name in that strange English? "We're going to the infirmary, okay? I think it's still open. Can you stand?" I nod my head as best I can, grabbing the wall to use it to balance myself out. It doesn't work very well, I can tell you that much. My legs are frozen.   

"I can't make my legs move." I say hoarsely. "I can't make them move." I keep my eyes on the set of shoes in front of me. "I'm sorry. I'm really, really sorry."   

"Oi, you're going to turn into Sakurai if you keep saying that." Imayoshi says with irritation, which brings a bout of apologies from the chronically apologetic boy. I attempt laughing as I sit there, wondering what the hell is wrong with me.   

"Up we go." I let out a yelp as someone carries me, catching me off guard. I kind of go limp for a bit as I'm carried upright. My visit to infirmary turns into one to the clinic with the same gentle doctor, who looks most unhappy to see me here once again. As soon as I see him, and no, it isn't because of his face, I turn green.   

"Daiki." I mutter. "Gonna hurl." Daiki blinks at me before telling the doctor in slightly better terms. It's less than ten seconds when my breakfast decides to show its face again. Luckily, there's something to contain the mess. I can't really remember what happened after that. I see lots of lights and faces keep swirling and at some point I think I fell asleep. Lots of words are scattered everywhere. After a while, everything goes right to hell, and I'm out like a light.    

There's a strange beeping noise, one I don't think I've heard before. I feel nausea and my stomach hurts with every breath I take and I feel unusually sleepy. "Fuuuuuuck." I groan, attempting to peel my eyes open. It takes more effort than I'll ever admit to.   

"That wasn't very ladylike." The teasing voice is eerily familiar, and makes my lips twist into a half-assed smile before I lock eyes with the bluenette.   

"You're not very ladylike." I retort. "What's that annoying noise?"   

"Heart rate monitor."  

"Cute." I reply with more than a little venom. "Why am I he- never mind." I stare at the roof slightly.   

"I have to go get Satsuki to tell the nurse you woke up." Daiki says after a few minutes.   

"Okay." I say after a few heartbeats. He leaves in that relaxed way of his, as if he hasn't a care in the world. My lips curve in slight smile as I study him silently. I stare at the roof again, counting tiles and lights. There's something tight wrapped around my ribs and my ankle. My stomach is tolerable, but still irritating.   

"Hai-chan!" The pinkette explodes into the room, tailed worriedly by the nearest nurse. "How do you feel?"  

"Sleepy." I groan. "Kind of sore and stiff."   

"You gave us quite the scare." The nurse muses, giving me a gentle smile. "The doctor will be here in a few minutes." I nod slightly, trying my damnedest to stay awake.   

"It seems you'll live." I glance at the doorway and move to get up so I can see properly. "Don't bother sitting up. Won't feel good. I promise." I'm surprised to see Midorima here.   

I blink in shock. "Midorima..." I say in shock.   

"The others came by when you were sleeping. I dropped by since it's on my way home." Midorima says as he pushes his glasses up. "Hanamiya Makoto, right? We'll get him." I almost grimace at the mere mention of the devil boy's name. "Anyway, I need to go."   

"Thanks for dropping by." I reply. "Good luck in your games." The boy merely nods before bidding me goodbye and leaving. "Daiki-"  

"Jesus, Alex, you coulda gotten seriously injured! Do you even know what happened?" I freeze at Daiki's words as Satsuki helps me sit up properly. "You're lucky the nurse caught what was going on!"  My mouth opens and closes as I search for something to say. I'm saved, just barely, by the clinic doctor coming in.

"I've been told I can call you Hai-san. Is that correct?" the doctor says as he reads a clipboard.   

"Yes." I say anxiously.   

"You came here because a school nurse thought you may be suffering from shock and blunt abdominal trauma. She was correct in both assessments." The doctor says calmly. "You had some serious internal bleeding, which we drained surgically. We also found three broken ribs, a serious sprain in your ankle, and many bruises. How did you acquire these?" I sigh deeply.   

"We had this basketball match, and the other team was very rough in their playing style. I made one of their players angry, he found me after the game, and..." I frown. "I don't really remember the rest very well. I think he was kicking me?" The doctor assesses me silently.   

"You're very lucky that he was stopped when he was." I nod.   

"Yes. I am." I reply quietly. "Um... about the hospital bills... how many years do you think it will take me to pay them off?"   

"Actually," the doctor says with a smile, "your school has covered your bills because you were injured playing for them." My eyes grow wide from shock. "Is there an adult responsible for you?" I shake my head.   

"If there had to be one, probably Coach Harasawa or the Kurokos." I say with a sigh. The doctor nods once more and looks over his clipboard.   

"We'll let you go home in an hour or so. Is there someone who can take you home and take care of you?" He asks. I frown slightly.   

"I can." Daiki says suddenly, surprising me slightly. I offer him a warm, nervous smile. My heart races slightly.   

Somehow, the doctor’s face softens considerably. "Hai-chan, you're not allowed to do anything strenuous, including basketball and lifting things and running, for a month. Your stitches need to be cleaned twice a day. I strongly recommend you refrain from standing for long periods of time, twisting, turning, bending over, and stretching." He says firmly. "Your stomach has four incisions, so it'll be tender. Bruising is normal. Your ribs are cracked, and that ankle of yours is not to come out of the brace until I see you again."   

I start dozing off slight after that, so Daiki sets up another appointment for me and leaves to get my meds. "Hai-chan," Satsuki says, startling me awake. "We need to drive you home. Is it okay for my dad to pick us up?" I mumble something I hope sounds like "yes" and go back into my groggy half-sleep, humming slightly in satisfaction. Satsuki's father doesn't take long to get here. 

"Oi, Alex, time to get up." Daiki says some time later as I'm being discharged. I toss several unsavory choice words at him before going back to sleep. "I'll dump water on you." He threatens. I crack one eye open grumpily, hoping it shows how bad my mood is about to become. "Yeah, yeah, you're about as terrifying as a kitten. C'mon." The bed is warm, although I'm sure it took more than a few minutes for it to become that way. 

"I need to get dressed." I mutter with embarrassment. "I'm not going out in this. _I feel breezes where such things should not be felt_." Daiki, for once, shows a shred of decency and blushes like hell. 

"Um... Satsuki..." He glances almost helplessly at the pinkette before darting out of the room. Once he's gone, my face darkens as I blush heavily. 

"I get it." She says with a smile. "I won't look, but I'll help." It takes several minutes and a bit of struggling to get my pants on. My shirt and um, other underclothes, take a while longer as I raise my right arm in a rather uncomfortable fashion. It doesn't feel good at all when I do so, but the pain meds I'm on must be top-notch. I barely feel a thing after a while. 

"Make sure you cough and take deep breaths at least once per hour." The doctor says firmly as I limp my way out the door. "You'll be coming back in about four weeks. We'll take everything else from there." I nod, thank him, and walk with Daiki and Satsuki to Mr. Momoi's car. 

"Hai-chan!" He says with a smile. Satsuki's father has an unusually sunny disposition, something I really admire. "The way Satsuki was going on and on about you, the missus and I thought for sure you were on your way to kicking the bucket." I laugh breathlessly and hug him with one arm. 

"Don't think I would keel over and start pushing up daisies just because some brat lost his temper." I reply with an amused smile. "I'm not so fragilely built, ya know." We grow more somber after a few more minutes of joking around. I sit in the middle of the backseat, wedged comfortably between Daiki and Satsuki. 

"I'm serious when I say this though, Hai-chan." Mr. Momoi says with a very sober expression. "Your parents should be ashamed of themselves. From what I've heard, they haven't bothered to ask about what happened when we informed them of the, uh, incident." I attempt shrugging.

"At least I know how not to turn out." I reply with a sigh. "It is what it is, after all. I don't need them when I have Daiki and Satsuki beside me." I say the last bit with a smile and another little shrug of my shoulders, even though doubt is beginning to worm though my chest. Pink eyes look at me very seriously in the rearview mirror. 

Silence consumes the interior of the car as we drive through several winding routes to get to my apartment. "Think you can make it up all those stairs?" Mr. Momoi says with a rather amused, yet still concerned look on his face. 

"Well if I can't, I can use Daiki." I reply flatly. The bluenette slides a warning in the form of a glare from the corner of his eyes. "I think I'll manage." It takes another ten minutes, but I manage to convince the Momois that I will indeed survive for the remainder of the next four weeks without much hassle. They drive off only after seeing me enter my building, Daiki just a few feet in front of me. I do make it up the stairs, somehow, only to lie on my bed and stare at the cracks in my ceiling. 

"You're really very lucky, you know." Daiki says as he enters my room, some water sloshing out of the glass in his hand as he carelessly sits down on my bed, his back against the wall and his legs draped absentmindedly over mine. 

"I know." I answer. "Was it you who saw... him first?" The dark look that crosses Daiki's face confirms it. "Thank you for that." The bluenette stares at me in surprise for a few more moments. 

"Jeez, I can't let you out of my sight, can I?" I smile slightly.

"Perhaps."


	13. Chapter Thirteen

The sky is so very, very blue today. Bluer than Daiki's eyes and Kuroko's hair, brighter than the lights that shine down so relentlessly on the basketball courts below me, and more unusually at ease than the calm ocean near my old home. Flat, fluffy clouds twist into unconventional wisps and cotton candy shapes as some invisible wind pushes them across the sky. I'm definitely glad I agreed to come to the roof today. 

It's so silent up here, without a trace of the busy lives of the students who are no doubt hard at work somewhere on campus during their club activities. I'm pretty sure that Daiki's asleep beside me, like he doesn't sleep enough at home or during class. I'd look over at him, check to see how deeply he's asleep and maybe try to see what kind of expression Daiki makes when he sleeps, but I don't. Instead, I continue to stare at the sky and wish ruefully that I could feel at peace forever. 

"Hai-chan!" Satsuki says as her head pops up over the edge of the rooftop, most likely still on the ladder. I jerk with a start, breathing in a bit too sharply and nearly yelping at the sensation of my ribs expanding beyond what they deem acceptable. 

"Satsuki." I reply with a smile, watching how the pinkette rakes a somehow pleased gaze over the sleeping Daiki and my rather lazy body. She says nothing for a few moments, stepping over the edge of the rooftop and sitting down beside me. Without a word, she stretches out her legs and lets me rest my head in her lap. "The sky is pretty today." 

Satsuki doesn't really respond to that. She looks up to examine the sky, assessing it on her own. "It's a nice day today." She says with an unusually sweet tone of voice. "You haven't been coming to practice as often, Hai-chan. I was getting really worried about you. All you do is sit there looking pissed and bounce that ball of yours against the wall." I almost disregard her words completely, feeling a sense of relaxation set in. 

"The breeze is really nice, too. It isn't strong at all." I murmur. Then I look back up at Satsuki. "I'm just kind of irritated, that's all. I want to practice, but I can't. It's annoying." I stretch my fingers for a moment before sitting up carefully. "It's nice up here. I can see why Daiki's always out here." 

I gaze at the blue-haired prodigy from the corner of my eye, wondering if he's still asleep or faking. It's not like I'll call him out on it or anything. Daiki has his own behavioral rules. If he thinks he should fake sleeping, I won't stop him. When he fidgets his fingers slightly, I glance away and pretend I didn't see anything. After all, he really could be sleeping, and it's weird to watch sleeping people. "Did you come up here just to tell me that?" 

"Mm." Satsuki says, a noncommittal look on her face. I look at the pink-haired girl suspiciously. 

"What is it?" I ask with an exasperated sigh.  _So she did have an ulterior motive. Oh, well._ "I'm not lending you money." 

"That's not it at all!" Satsuki says with an almost indignant expression. "Coach Harasawa thought that it would be beneficial to have something the team does together for bonding, and I agreed to talk to the players about it. We haven't really decided on what we're going to do, so..."

"You want us off the roof so we can discuss this altogether?" I reply with a sigh, scratching my side absentmindedly. "Fine. I'll get down this time." 

"Um... Dai-chan..." Satsuki says as I sit up and she goes to wake him up. 

"Don't wanna." He replies flatly. 

"Keep up that attitude and I'll have you carry me down the ladder, lazy." I reply, peering down the ladder. "Saaaatsuki, I don't wanna move this much." 

"You're as lazy as ever." Satsuki says with a playful sigh. We grin at each other before I glance at Daiki. 

"C'mon, Daaaaiiiiiki." I say with a sigh. "There's a 90% chance you'll get free food out of this." Daiki's right eye opens lazily as he looks at me. It looks like he'll certainly say no, but I might as well try anyway. "Besides, you can probably manage to annoy almost everyone in first string just by showing up. Wakamatsu's always funny when he's annoyed." 

Daiki's eye slides shut as he sighs. "Fine." He grumbles unhappily. "Don't think you convinced me to go or something. I just changed my mind." I smile warmly at him. 

"Of course, Daiki." I say with a somewhat softened expression. Then my expression goes back to whatever it normally is. "Ugh, ladders." I'm the first to brave the ladder, going down slowly and feeling my sore muscles protest with every rung I descend. 

"Doing okay there, Hai-chan?" Satsuki asks as I near the bottom half of the ladder. 

"Perfect." I reply icily. "Perfectly fine. Swell. _Fantastic_. Have I ever mentioned that I don't like heights very much?" _This is why I don't like the gym roof._ Most of the way down passes with me practically praying to the ladder to hold me before my feet somehow slip. I yelp as my arms jerk my body painfully, and try to grab my foothold once more. Unfortunately, the ladder stops about a body length and a half from the ground. I had Daiki boost me up using a stool, but I can't see the stool below me, and falling from this height is not good for my ankle. "Satsuki, I can't get off the ladder. What happened to the thing that was below the ladder?"

"There wasn't anything there when I got here." Satsuki says, looking down from her position a few rungs above me. "Move to the side. I'll jump down and try to find something." I do move to the side until Satsuki passes me and drops awkwardly and goes to search for something.

"Satsuki!" I call, "Just tell me where-" The pinkette is gone, and the last rung appears to be at stomach level. My arms are burning. "Daiki?" The bluenette is undoubtedly still on the roof. "Daiki!" I shout his name a few more times, but he doesn't answer. " _Aomine Daiki!_ "  He still doesn't show any signs of popping into existence, where I can see him, so I shut my mouth and frown with irritation. Maybe I can go down rung by rung. 

That's how Satsuki finds me, hanging three or four feet off the ground, swaying slightly as I reach the last rung of the ladder. "Satsuki..." I glance at the pinkette. "Can I come down now?" 

"I couldn't find anything for you to step on." She says apologetically, "But I  _did_ get Wakamatsu, since he's tallest." I glance at the blond. 

"Sorry, Wakamatsu. I thought I left something to stand on." I say sheepishly, my face reddening. 

"Um... how do you wanna do this?" Wakamatsu asks, equally red faced. 

"I'd really recommend against grabbing my stomach or ribs, if that helps. Also, my arms are starting to hurt." I say as I try to adjust my grip once more. "I'm gonna drop in another minute." Wakamatsu goes into action after another few moments, carrying my legs over one arm and placing his other arm at my back. 

Wakamatsu sometimes surprises me, ya know? He acts loudmouthed and annoying and otherwise irritating, but he's also surprisingly intelligent and gentle and friendly. I could get along with him. He reminds me of the old Aomine and that Kagami kid. It's not like I actually dislike him at all. He just reminds me of the old Teiko, the one I originally joined, the one that I want to see once more. I know it's really a rather foolish wish, to ask for the past back so I can enjoy what I took for granted, but it's something I wish I'd held close. 

I thank the blond boy and roll my shoulders, trying to work out the kinks that have formed from not playing any sports within the last week. "Daiki, get down here! I'm not coming back up there." I holler, my eyes narrowing slightly. "If you're not down here in thirty seconds, you don't get dinner and I'll hide your futon." Daiki's head pops up over the edge of the roof. 

"Calm yourself, woman!" Daiki yells in response. "I'll be down in just a minute." I smile slightly back up at him. 

"That's about thirty seconds too long!" I reply teasingly. "Maybe I'll move your futon outside so it freezes overnight." The small shape of Daiki retreats and then climbs down the ladder. I try to exaggerate my impatience, but all it does is seem to amuse Daiki as he makes a show of dropping from the ladder. I roll my eyes. 

"Why do we have to go, anyway?" Daiki whines, throwing an arm around my shoulder carelessly as we walk toward the gym. 

"It's a team event. You're a member of Touou's basketball team, aren't you?" I reply patiently. "It's good to get along with your teammates, you know." Daiki's arm feels a little heavy as he leans on me to show his displeasure. I roll my eyes and continue to walk forward. "At least be civil with them, you know? It's not like they can ask us to make nice and play house together." 

Wakamatsu snorts behind us before guffawing. I turn slightly, as much as Daiki's arm allows, and give him a warm smile. Daiki huffs quietly beside me as I turn back around and attempt pulling away from him. "I'm hungry." Daiki groans as we enter the gym. I can feel my irritation welling up as I walk in. My current inability to play frustrates me. 

"Good for you." I reply with notes of annoyance lacing my voice. "Next time you can have part of my bento. It's not like I eat all of it anyway." Satsuki whacks the back of my head, making me lurch forward awkwardly. My foot stomps into the floor and my knee gives a bit before I push her with my side with equal force. I try to show her just how irritated she's made me. "Ow." 

"Sorry." Satsuki says as she giggles. "I didn't mean to hit you that hard." I think I can feel some sort of twitch coming on. Before it can manifest, Satsuki turns her attention to the team. "Anyway, Coach Harasawa has asked for all of you to spend some time together, just so we're sure nobody's going to cause problems amongst you. You can do pretty much anything." 

Wakamatsu, Daiki, and Susa all look at me expectantly, to which I raise an eyebrow and try to pull another vanishing act. It doesn't work all too well since I'm in plain view, but I do manage to dodge the full force of their gazes. "Imayoshi, what do you suggest?" I ask, trying to divert this unusual focus. 

"Hm." Imayoshi says, looking almost thoughtful. I try to see if I can read his thoughts from his expression, but Imayoshi has a rather smug, placid face most of the time. I haven't really seen him surprised or shocked or anything, so I'm not entirely sure he can make those expressions. "I'm pretty much broke right now." 

"Same." I say with a sigh. "So what can we do that isn't too expensive?" Imayoshi and I turn to Wakamatsu, looking at him expectantly before I hear a familiar stomach grumble. I blink in surprise and try not to glance at Daiki. "Why don't we just get something to eat? Pretty hard to mess that up. Sounds like some of us are hungry, anyway." 

"I have no objections." Imayoshi says. 

"Fine with me." Susa supplies. Daiki's in it for the food, so he votes for it as well. Wakamatsu and Sakurai end up agreeing with us after a few more moments. 

"So... where to?" 

Ten minutes later we stand outside a decent sized yakitori restaurant. The smell of grilled chicken is making my mouth water. "Well I'm down for it." I say to the expectant Wakamatsu. "Smells really good~!" 

Daiki places a hand on my head and ruffles my hair rather roughly despite my loud protests to it. "It's just food, Alex." He says with an amused expression. I roll my eyes and push his hand from my head. 

"There's no such thing as 'just food' in this world, Daiki!" I reply vehemently. "Well, unless it's sushi, spicy, or bitter." I mutter under my breath. Daiki then ruffles my hair again forcefully as I try to push his hand away. 

"If you overeat you'll get fat." Daiki says teasingly. I roll my eyes. 

"If I don't order more food than I can eat, you take so much that I'm still hungry!" I respond as I finally dodge his hand. 

"You eat too slow!"

"Keep your paws away from my food!" I end up laughing so much at the end of my sentence that my ribs ache and my words are broken. Daiki simply whacks my head and threatens to eat everything I order as we walk into the restaurant. 

The instant we're in, the smell of grilled meat wafts over me, making my stomach grumble loudly in anticipation of being filled. I haven't had the chance or the money to eat out for almost a year now, so this is a really nice change of pace. It's not like I don't work or something. I work most days after practice from 4 to 8, and on weekends from 12 to 4. Despite that, bills and rent and groceries do end up taking a good chunk of my salary. The rest of my money is in the bank (Satsuki's parents helped me set it up) or in my wallet for pocket money. 

We order pretty quickly, and I can barely sit still from excitement. I can almost taste the hot meat on my tongue, sliding down my throat, settling in my stomach. My lips curl up at the edges with an edgy sort of joy. We banter back and forth for a while. Imayoshi thinks that because I'm a frequent companion to Daiki that I must not be too intelligent. I'm working on trying to change his mind. I'm actually rather intelligent, you know? Daiki's not really  _stupid_ either. He just doesn't apply himself to anything other than basketball. 

"I don't believe it." Imayoshi says as I tell him that I recently received a great grade on my latest test. 

"Then we can both go talk to my teachers about my grades, since it concerns you  _so much_." I reply patiently, my lips curling into a smirk. "I might not be familiar with much kanji, but I know enough to get by in school without much hassle." 

"Fine. But prove you can read this." Imayoshi takes a napkin, pulls out a pen from god knows where, and writes a long, rather intimidating looking paragraph until the napkin is filled with lots of kanji and kana. Then he hands it to me. "Then I want you to translate it." 

Daiki laughs beside me, leaning back in his seat. "You'll have to try harder than that." He says to Imayoshi as I read the words aloud, take my napkin, and translate it almost instantaneously. I hand it back to him for inspection. 

"My translation is correct." I say when he raises an eyebrow. "I'm a native English speaker. I know what I'm doing when it comes to English." My eyes narrow as he reads over the translation. 

"Do this one." He takes the back of the napkin and writes more. Handing it back to me, I can tell that this translation will be more difficult. It takes me a while longer to go over this series of words. 

"I don't recognize this kanji." I say, pointing at it as I look up at Imayoshi. "What is it?" 

"Hesitation." I go back to my translation, dodging a few plates of grilled meat and Daiki's chopsticks. 

"You just like making my life difficult." I say, finishing up and passing the napkin back. "You better hope I didn't just do your homework or something." Imayoshi just smiles at me with exaggerated innocence. I roll my eyes and eat my meal, smiling at the taste of good food. 

"Speaking of homework-" Daiki starts. 

"No." I say flatly. "Do it yourself."

"But Alex, you like doing English  _anyway_." I roll my eyes. 

"But then you didn't earn your grade, did you? It's not like I won't help you." I reply with a closed-eyed smile. 

"But... effort... I don't get it." He says flatly. I blink. 

"It's English. It's not as difficult as you think." I reply. 

" _You food eat fast."_ Daiki says in a monotone. I blink for a second. 

"Was... was that even English?" Susa asks with a rather confused expression. 

" _You eat food fast."_ I say. "Be more careful about your sentence structure." Daiki rolls his eyes. I laugh at his  _I'm-so-done-with-you_ expression. "Besides, we both know I do most of your homework every time I say I'll help, so don't complain too much, Daiki." The blue-haired dunce huffs in embarrassment and looks away. 

"Fine, fine." he says sheepishly. I give him an amused smile and continue eating. 

"Why are you taking English if you already speak it?" Wakamatsu asks, waving his chopsticks around in the air. I fend of Daiki's pilfering chopsticks. 

"It's a required class. For me, it's just an easy grade. I get to speak English for part of the day, so it isn't so bad since I don't get to speak it any time else." I reply. "Plus I sometimes tutor kids during lunch, so more English for me." 

"Speaking of tutoring." Imayoshi says. "Some of us have a failing grade in English. We're going to need to get those grades up if we want to keep playing basketball." 

"So, tutoring?" I reply. "I don't normally do it for free, but I'll help. We're teammates after all." 


	14. Chapter Fourteen

Daiki taps his pencil impatiently against the open textbook, sometimes pausing to gnaw absentmindedly on the much-abused eraser. His blue eyes are scanning the page with a rather empty, sleepy gaze. He nods slightly, eyes closing, before I snap his book shut before him as noisily and obnoxiously as possible. The blue-haired teen wakes with a start, eyes startled and still slightly cloudy. "Daiki, go to bed if you're going to sleep." I say flatly as he looks up. "It's no use studying if you can't stay awake for longer than ten minutes at a time."

"Gonna fail though." He groans, stretching lethargically. "Gotta stay in school." I sigh.

"Then at least try to stay awake! Drink some coffee or something!" I reply heatedly, going back to my math homework. "Anyway, move onto something else for a while. You can get back to that when you finish something else." Daiki yawns loudly, licking his lips afterward and getting up slowly.

"I'm gonna order dinner." He says as he scratches his head. "Want yakisoba?"

"Yes, please." I reply, working my way through a way too intense problem. "Order some meat or veggie dish. I'll share it with you."

"Sure." Daiki says, flipping open his cell and dialing the number. He places the order as I finish the exceptionally frustrating worksheet. I try not to yawn.

"When are the other idiots coming over?" Daiki asks, sitting back down to attempt his homework once more.

"Sometime this week." I reply absently. "Didn't really specify when. Probably tomorrow or Thursday."

"Hm." Daiki replies, tapping his pencil once more. We sit in silence a while longer as I finish my assignments and leave to get a drink from the kitchen. "Alex, can I use your notes?"

"Go ahead. Your copies are probably right behind mine. If you don't see them just copy it yourself." I answer, sipping my water. The doorbell rings, and my stomach growls in response.

"I got it." Daiki says after a few heartbeats. The sound of paper falling and hasty shuffling amuse me as Daiki probably gratefully puts off doing his homework a while longer. The door opens before the doorbell rings once more. "Oh." is all I hear afterward, cuing me to take a look.

"Daiki?" I call, popping my head out of the kitchen. "Is that the food?"

"I wish." He replies, slamming the door. It opens a few seconds later to reveal the first-string regulars. I sigh in disappointment.

"And here I was hoping for food." I groan unhappily. "At least send a warning before showing up suddenly!" Imayoshi only laughs at my flustered reply.

"What, no parents here?" Wakamatsu asks he enters.

"They live overseas." I reply testily. "Not that it's really any of your business anyway." I sigh once more. "I hope you all ate earlier, because Daiki and I only ordered enough takeout to feed ourselves."

"Ouch." Imayoshi says with amusement. "Not too keen on company, are you?"

"You're the one who showed up unannounced. If you'd told me you guys were coming today, I would've adjusted my plans." I reply with irritation. "It can't be helped anyway."

The doorbell rings once more, and I look to Daiki. "Nope. That's all yours." Daiki says, holding up his hands. I give him an unimpressed look before walking to the door.

"If this is the food, I'm eating your share." I reply, opening the door. There stands a rather unusual sight. "What are you doing here?" I ask with a bewildered look. "And how on earth do you know where I live?"

Here stands the hotheaded Kagami Taiga with his shadow right beside him. "Kagami is failing English." Kuroko says flatly.

"Oi! Don't say it so bluntly!" Kagami practically shrieks in humiliation. I laugh.

"I don't tutor for free, ya know." I reply, leaning against the doorframe with my arms crossed. "Got anything of equal value?" Then I blink. "How the hell are you failing English when you lived in America?" The words come out as a screech of shock.

"I could get by with just speaking!" He replies with equal volume.

"What the actual- oh, is that for me?" My lips curve into an overjoyed smile as Kuroko holds up a vanilla shake.

"Yes. Please keep Kagami from failing." I sigh and move aside.

"Fine, fine." I reply with amusement. "I suppose this is adequate payment. Inside we go."

I look around with a sigh. "My apartment is too small for this..." I whine unhappily, taking a long, slow sip of my shake. "I expect payments for future tutoring. Break anything and you pay for it! Also, bring me yummy snacks." I give the six intruders and Daiki a cat-like smile.

The doorbell rings once more. "Daiki." I say flatly. "I will literally fight you. Your turn."

"Your apartment."

"I will _fight_ you."

"Don't wanna."

"You haven't paid me for all the notes I keep taking for you."

"Do it yourself." My aura darkens threateningly.

"If I open the door, I will place your futon on the balcony next time it rains and I'll let you sleep on it outside." My grin comes out more menacing than cheerful.

Daiki springs up. "I'm answering it because I chose to." He huffs red faced.

"Keep telling yourself that." Wakamatsu mutters just loudly enough for him to hear. I laugh while Daiki glares. Then he moves in that relaxed way of his, walking gracefully toward the door. Of course, even though Daiki's movements are graceful, everything else about him generally is _not_. I'm talking about not with a capital 'n'. Screw that, it's a not in all caps.

"Oh, it's actually food. We've been waiting _forever_." Daiki whines childishly. Knowing him, his rather happy, yet disappointed expression looks like he has a plan to kill the poor delivery person.

"Sorry!" The rather anxious looking delivery boy says. "W-We... at the restaurant... traffic... accident... extra...." I pop up beside Daiki and try to soothe the frazzled man-child.

"Ah, don't worry about it." I say with a smile. I then elbow Daiki hard enough to make him fall. "Don't be rude to other people!" Daiki writhes around with exaggerated pain. "Daiiiiki you still have to pay. Give me your wallet." The overly anxious boy makes a beeline for the stairs once he exchanges my food for his money.

"Smells gooood." Daiki says, grabbing the takeout from my hands and clearing part of the living room table so we can sit and eat. I second him, grabbing our chopsticks and handing him his pair. Yes, I did buy new chopsticks. They probably won't break as easily as my last pair, since they're a little more expensive and better made. I jam some yakisoba in my mouth.

"So, tell me what I can do to help." I say around my food, scalding my tongue and flipping open my textbook. "If I can get Daiki a passing grade, I sure as hell can get you to pass, too."

"Oi!" Daiki elbows me roughly, making me wince in pain.

" _Ouch_ , Daiki." I hiss, rubbing my side. "Treat girls more gently, or you'll be alone forever." Daiki looks concerned for a while as I rub my side and grimace. Then I give him a smile, attempting to reassure him, and eat more yakisoba. "Kuroko, should I assume that Kagami is pretty much hopeless?"

"Yes." Kagami then glares at the smaller blue-haired boy.

"Oi!"

"Just the way I like them." I reply with a wicked grin. "You won't like it, but I'll whip you right into shape. For every answer on your next test that you get wrong, you have to..." I think for a few moments. "Actually, Daiki's pretty much taken up all my ideas." Daiki gives me a glare. "You have to buy me a burger for every answer you get wrong. Agreed?"

"Fine." Kagami says with a grimace. I beam at him.

"Actually, since you lived in America, you know how to _make_ burgers, right? Like, the good stuff?" Kagami narrows his eyes.

"...Yes." I grin and bounce happily.

"From what Kuroko tells me, you like burgers. Here's our deal. If you get less than a passing grade, you have to make me burgers whenever I want them until you receive a passing grade. If you somehow manage a passing grade, I'll make you something until your next exam. How's that?" Kagami's lips curve into a wicked smile.

"I won't lose!"

"Sure, sure." I reply, taking another mouthful of my wonderful yakisoba. "Let's get to work."

After an hour and a half, my poor students look a little more enlightened. "You can't put that here, Sakurai." I say, circling the word _interesting_. "That's like saying 'you interesting are' instead of 'you are interesting.' English can be difficult like that. It's subject-verb-adjective in this case." Then I turn to the much less hopeful Kagami and pray that he's faring better than the others.

I stare at his paper for a few minutes, reading over his homework before I sigh. "W-What?" Kagami asks, noting my rather oppressive silence. I continue reading the paper.

"K-Kagami." I say, staring at him. "I thought you weren't very bright." He looks kind of hopeful. "You led me on! I can't understand a word of this!" My lips quiver. "That's it. You're going to pass English even if it kills you! From now on, for every mistake you make, you owe me ten pushups with me sitting on you!" Kagami stares at me wide-eyed as Daiki snickers.

"Now, let me look at your paper, _Daiki_." I say with sinister gaze. The blue-haired prodigy instantly shuts up.

"I-I'm not done!" He replies hastily.

"That's okay. I'll make sure you haven't messed up yet." I reply in the same frosty tone. "After all, I've let you get away with hiding your paper from me for the last forty-five minutes." Daiki almost makes it out the door. Fortunately, my arm is as accurate as ever. His phone slams into the back of his head with record force.

The bluenette trips and falls face-first before I grab his collar and go through the effort of dragging him back to the living room. Daiki's fairly heavy for someone like me to drag around. I'm not even going to try to sound dignified about it. I mean, in the end, I just dragged him like he was a dead animal and flopped down onto the couch tiredly. "That did _not_ feel good. I'm sure your paper is fine." Of course, Daiki's brain lets me down once more. "Daiki..." I grow rather irritated. "Sometimes I wonder if you should really be in the same class as the rest of us." Daiki sighs. "Sorry, Daiki, but you have so many mistakes that I'm having a really hard time just reading through one sentence. Tell me what you're trying to write. We'll work on it."

And we do. It takes all my energy, but between Daiki and Kagami, I somehow manage to make their English a bit more improved. The other regulars left after another hour, hopefully somewhat improved, but I won't let these two leave until I can actually understand what's been written. We can work on speech another day.

When I can actually comprehend what's being written, we do manage to make some progress. The sentences get a little more complicated and reading improves. Kagami's listening and speaking are fine as they are, so I don't go over it with him. His writing is horrendous though. We're working on it, though. It shows some good signs of improvement.

After three hours of nothing but fixing English, we all agree to take a break. I reheat my abandoned yakisoba and finish it off, then take some of Daiki's stir-fry and grilled meat. He doesn't bother to tell me not to take any. Kagami's raiding my fridge, Kuroko is pretty much passed out, and Daiki and I are pretty worn. "Kuroko, if you're so tired why not crash here tonight? I'd feel bad if you walked home since it's so late." I say, feeling full and more than a little lazy.

Kuroko gives me a strange look before flopping back onto his back. "Just ask your parents. I'm sure they'll understand. It doesn't bother me if you stay- or you either, Kagami. It's dangerous to walk alone at night." I say more gently. In the end, Kuroko agrees to stay the night, and Kagami does as well since it's a way to walk to his house. We order a lot more takeout and soon my living room floor is littered with empty boxes, disposable chopsticks, and crumpled sheets of scratch paper.

"Try one more time, Kagami. Just do the practice sheet once more, and I'm sure you'll get it." I say with a groan, flopping onto the couch. "Daiki, you try, too..." I nod off for a bit, my face buried in the couch cushions as I wonder if I'm actually doing any good for the two slightly-below-average-intelligence players.

"I think I got it." Kagami and Daiki say after a while longer, when I'm just about to sleep.

"Huuuuh?" I reply drowsily. "Coooool. Why do I care again?" It takes a while longer to pry my eyes open and stare at the two rather confused boys. "Lemme see." I rub the sleep from my eyes and sit up, trying to shake off my drowsiness as I yawn widely and read over the papers. "Well, I can recognize it as English, for a start. Pretty fluent. You'll pass if you show work like this or better." I hand back their homework. "Do you have anything else?"

We continue working on homework well past ten, when Kuroko finally falls asleep. Somewhere between twelve and one, Daiki, Kagami, and I pass out.

_"How about I teach you what happens to losers?" Dark eyes, glaring down at me as I shudder and clench my hands into fists._

_"We didn't lose, so stop it! We won already!" I glare back, hardening myself for the fit of rage that's about to come. "There's no need to get violent! Just accept that this team was more difficult that the last!" Pain blossoms in my back as the intertwined wires of the chain-link fence presses against me forcefully._

_"We could've lost! There's no point in playing you if you're unable to make us win!" Dark eyes, burning with hatred and disgust. Fear sends tremors up and down my legs, making my fingers shake as I grip the fence in my scraped hands._

_"We won any way that you look at it! Stop yelling at me, and get your hands off me!" I hiss, pushing the taller figure away._

_"Who's going to stop me?_ You _? Your parents? Your teammates? Look at them. They're all here, just watching me." I stare at the rest of my team, all dressed in red and black and white, looking away as I try to meet their gaze with my own._

_"Why?" I ask, glancing down at the floor. "Why do you always do this? We won! We won this game!" Dark eyes, staring down at me with a gaze so cold it freezes me insides. Realization dawns across my face. My chest constricts, my heart stops, and my face falls. "So it's like that."_

_"It is exactly like that." Murmurs the taller figure, dressed in red and white and black and a sinister grin. "It has always been like that, and there's nothing you can do about it."_

_"Fine." I reply flatly. "I'll get your victories, but if you so much as touch a hair on anyone's head, I will do nothing but cause you losses in every aspect of your life. Do we have a deal?"_

_"Very well." Red and black and white and evil. Pain makes my stomach explode and my lungs release all air. "That's how we'll shake hands today. Don't forget your promise, Alex. After all, some pawns are a little difficult to replace, but it isn't completely impossible. I'll get a newer version of you if you ever fail me."_

_"I know that already." I hiss furiously, wishing I could cleat the larger girl with the hateful eyes. "But don't think I'm doing this for you."_

_Pain blooms across my face, throughout my limbs, inside my chest. "You'll always win as long as you play for me."_

I get up with my heart racing and a heavy weight squishing me rather uncomfortably into the floor, although it's nothing unbearable. I look around my dark apartment and vaguely wonder how everything turned out the way it did. I was never competitive for a very long time before I came to Japan. I was fine with winning or losing as long as I had fun playing whatever game had my complete and undivided attention. When things stopped being fun, winning became an unavoidable must.

"Go back to sleep." Daiki groans next to me, probably somehow disturbed by my movements. "C'mere." In my sleepy thoughtlessness, I don't really understand the ramifications of whatever crosses my mind. I groan and flop back onto the not-quite-so-soft floor and burrow between the two large bundles of warmth. "Better?"

I make some sort of groan that I hope tells him that yes, being surrounded by warmth is much better than sitting up with my heart racing and my thoughts beginning to spiral into a past I don't want to keep remembering. I'm content with being here and feeling secure and not thinking about yesterday or an hour ago or what will happen in five minutes. Just being here now is completely fine by me.

Of course, that changes the moment I wake the next morning. I know that I've probably missed most of today's classes, but that's not really what bothers me. I can see Kuroko completely passed out on the carpet by my feet. What's much more interesting, and somehow slightly disturbing, is the fact that I'm perfectly sandwiched between two warm people who can't even spell properly. _Oh, well._


	15. Chapter Fifteen

I sit there for a while, wondering how to get out of this predicament. I mean it's not that I'm in some uncomfortable position. Being nestled so comfortably between two very attractive males is pretty appealing, but I don't want to be  _caught_ in this position. I also don't want them catching each other like this, since it'll bring about yet another bout of frustration to the air. My stomach rumbles as a reminder that I need to eat, and these two boys will definitely eat more than both Kuroko and I combined. I squirm a little more and try to wriggle my way free from the two teens. It doesn't really work. In fact, I'd say it kinda backfires. I get bundled more tightly between the taller boys. 

"K-Kuroko." I say with a strained tone of voice. "Help me." The sleepy bluenette opens ice colored eyes to stare at me lazily. 

"No thanks." He replies, rolling to face away from me. I almost twitch in irritation. 

"Kuro-"

"Shut up, Alex." Daiki groans. I resist the urge to smack the much taller player and the shorter boy by my feet. I sit in silence for a while longer, scowling, before I finally decide enough is enough. 

" _Everybody up!"_ I yell, squirming and bolting upright with a surge of angry energy. Kagami wakes with a start, hitting his head violently against the underside of the table and making empty takeout boxes fall into Daiki's face. Some leftover soy sauce drips onto his cheek, and Daiki wipes at it sleepily, groaning in discomfort. Kagami's head then slams into the floor as he releases a yell. His arm, which had previously been draped across my stomach, punches Daiki, who yells and hits his head on the table as well. I escape while I still have the opportunity, and barely manage to keep Kuroko from receiving a rather powerful kick to the head. 

"Why is it so dangerous to wake up?" I groan mournfully, moving to pick up the takeout boxes and throw them away. As expected, not a single morsel of food has been spared, much to the dismay of my grumbling stomach. I sigh and toss away the boxes and wasted paper. When I come back, the two aces are glaring daggers at each other, sparks practically flying through the air. 

"You always have to yell in the morning, huh?" Kuroko says with a sigh as I laugh at his atrocious bedhead. 

"It's because you wouldn't help me." I groan in response. I get changed into my normal attire and yawn as I reemerge, watching the two players avoid each other. "Let's go get food. I'm hungry." 

"I'm broke." Daiki grumbles. I check my wallet. 

"I'm out. Cooking it is." I groan, pulling my hair into a ponytail. "Complain and I'll kick you off the balcony."

"You make a lot of threats for a kid who has trouble opening the cupboards." Kagami notes as I try to climb the counter in an effort to grab a measuring cup. 

"Silence, Bakagami." I reply with irritation. "I didn't choose my shortness." Daiki snickers loudly behind me. "Oh, you got something to say, sassy pants?" Daiki glances away as he and Kagami stifle laughter. "Fine. I see how it is. None of you get my all-American secondary specialty!" 

""But... I didn't do anything." Kuroko whines, retrieving the necessary ingredients I'll be using. 

"Well... fine. You get some. Bakagami and Ahomine can go hunt for pigeons." I reply, giving the snickering duo the evil eye. 

"You know you'll pretend to make extra and give me some anyway." Daiki says teasingly. I hit him with a spatula as roughly as possible. 

"Maybe I'll spit in your food." I hiss, mixing my batter. "Besides, these aren't so great. Edible enough, I suppose. My burgers are a lot better compared to these." The batter is poured into the hot skillet, and I go on to work, frying up a flurry of pancakes. The smell of cinnamon and chocolate fills the apartment as I continue working, feeling my stomach grumble loudly. 

I'm done quickly enough to avoid my legs hurting. "Daiki, you're on syrup duty. I have no idea where it went." I reply, plopping the hopefully adequate stack of breakfast on the table. "Kagami, I kind of assumed you eat about as much as Daiki, so hopefully it's enough. If you're still hungry, I'll make more." 

Daiki takes a while to find the syrup, but I can't blame him since I didn't know where it was, either. Luckily, the container is new and unopened, so we don't have to worry about how old it is. It can't be that old anyway, since I ate pancakes last month and got drenched in syrup shortly afterward. It's a very long story, and it makes me laugh every time I think about it, but the long and short of it is that Daiki and I had a very competitive food fight that I lost since I started licking the syrup off whatever parts of me I could reach and forgot that throwing pancakes was still fair game. Good times, good times. 

"No throwing syrup this time." I warn, narrowing my eyes playfully. Daiki snorts at the laughable comment and sits down clumsily, shaking the table as he grabs some sort of drink. I smile slightly and try to get the two similar players to get along with each other as time progresses. 

 

"I'm really, really sorry if we got you in trouble." I say, walking with Kuroko and Kagami to their school so I can explain why they're so incredibly late. Daiki went to the arcade, and I agreed to meet him there sometime later, so he's a complete no-show. "I forgot how nice this campus looks. I _so_ wish I coulda gone here." 

"Why did you transfer on the second day anyway?" Kagami asks as we walk past the stream of students. 

"Akashi transferred me. He apparently thought I should be on the Touou team. It's just as well, since Kuroko's playing style and mine are opposites." I reply, stretching my arms lazily. "Maaaan, I'm itching to play. I haven't been able to practice for a while now. I'm starting to get antsy." 

"Can you play now?" Kuroko asks. I give the short shadow a wicked grin. 

"Doc said I could play as long as I don't get injured. Since basketball is  _technically_ a no-contact sport he okayed it, although he was really unhappy doing so." I say with a grin. "I go back to practice tomorrow since I'm a little sore." Kagami's walking pretty far ahead of us, so we both have to hurry to catch up, jogging slightly so we don't fall too far behind him. 

The gym here seems just as hopeful as it was the first time I walked in here. "Bakagami! Why didn't you show up to school? You, too, Kuroko!" There stands Aida Riko, coach extraordinaire, and a most terrifying sight. I enter hesitantly, several meters behind Kuroko. 

"Sorry, Aida-san." I say politely. "They came to me for English tutoring last night, and we spent all last night and this morning working on it. They fell asleep in my living room, and my housemate and I didn't wake up until around noon." Aida's eyes soften somehow. 

"Well, if it's for academics..." I bow apologetically. 

"Sorry to inconvenience you." I say as my gaze drops to the floor. "It seemed really important, so..." 

"Y-You don't have to bow! You aren't used to doing so anyway, aren't you?" Aida says with this strange, anxious voice. I straighten up. 

"I've been here a while now. It doesn't bother me to bow to Japanese people when I have to." I reply smoothly. "If it were unnecessary or to someone I don't like, we would have issues." My eyes glide across the gym as I take note of the activity that buzzes about the gym. "Anyway, please don't blame Kuroko and Kagami. It's my fault that they didn't show up to class today." 

"S-Sure." Aida says. Then something rockets to me with shocking speed. I barely manage to track it and catch it. 

"You shouldn't throw things, Kagami." I say frostily, dribbling the ball absentmindedly. "I could've gotten hurt, you know." 

"Gotten hurt my ass." Kagami says with irritation. "You played with  _them,_ right? Why don't we see how we measure up?" 

"Hm? I came here to keep you out of trouble, not to play you." I say, passing the ball back to Kagami with more force than necessary. He stops the ball and rubs his hand. "Besides, I don't have my shoes or any clothes. If I had those, I would probably agree." Kuroko holds up an unusually familiar bag. 

"Here." I blink with surprise before scowling.

"Why do you have my gym bag?" 

"Kagami made me." I turn to the redhead. 

"You're getting on my nerves, Bakagami. I haven't played for about a month, so you're really kinda irritating me. Do you have anything of equal value?" My lips curve into a bitter smirk. "I can't afford to play for free today. I owe Daiki a match on some arcade game." 

"If I win, you play one on one with me for the next month." Kagami says. "You can decide what happens if I lose." 

"Seems about equal." I say, taking my bag and leaving to change. When I return, all my hair is up except for my overgrown bangs. "I'll warn you, though. I'm not going to be beaten by a boy who can't spell  _particularly_ correctly." I glance to Kuroko. "A two bobby problem?" Kuroko smiles. 

"I would give him three or four, Hai-chan. I wouldn't want you to underestimate him. Are you sure you should be playing? You're still recovering..." I give the small blue-haired boy a chilled look. 

"Do not tell me what I can and cannot do, Kuroko." I reply icily. I launch right into reading Kagami. "He's still not up to par with Daiki, but he'll do for today." I relent in putting in four bobby pins to keep my bangs back and lace up my shoes carefully. "You work with jumps, right? As great as that is for you and Daiki, I don't play the height game. Half court or full court, Kagami Taiga?" 

"Don't matter to me." Kagami says, moving toward the center of the court. 

"I haven't met such an excited person in a long time." I say, striding behind him purposefully. "Let's go full court. Hell, you can even have teams if you want. My blood is  _boiling_ with excitement." My lips widen in a larger, slightly terrifying grin. "I definitely won't lose to you now." 

The game starts without warning as Kagami tries to breeze past me. Luckily, my short height comes into play. I duck out of his line of sight, steal the ball, and race toward the opposite side of the court, fending off Kagami with relative ease. I give a jump, and even though Kagami soon rises higher than I can, I drop to the earth faster than he can and shoot from the opposite direction. "Yours." I pass him the bouncing ball. 

Kagami gives me a grin, his eyes narrowed. "I'll definitely beat you." My observation skills go into overdrive as I assess and manipulate, stealing and faking, running and chasing.  _Four jumps._

"It's clear what your limit is." I say flatly as I dribble and break away from Kagami. "You'll need to have more endurance if you want to beat either of us in this game." I manage a painful dunk. My chest is starting to ache from breathing hard, and sweat is dripping down the sides of my face. Bakagami isn't any better, to be honest. 

"You think you can beat me? I refuse to lose to someone shorter than Kuroko!" Kagami declares loudly. I steal the ball from him and make him chase me. I eventually win our game to 21 at the score of 21-10. 

Red eyes, staring at me widely with an expression I detest most in this world. "Don't look at me like that." I say with irritation. "You wanted a game, so I gave you one. Daiki would've taken this to another level since he's been waiting longer than I have." 

Red eyes, staring at me with that clouded gaze. "Kagami..." Red eyes are narrowing in frustration. "You have a nice look in your eyes. I hope we play you formally." Red eyes are looking ashamed. I don't know what to do. "Kagami..."  _What do I do?_ I know I'll act impulsively, without thinking, and of course, I'll do something stupid. I kneel in front of him. "Look at me." 

Red eyes staring at me with intensity I've never seen before; he doesn't move from his position on the bench. "That was probably my favorite game of one on one. Games with Daiki are like I have to keep up or eat dust, or like I have to beat him or I won't be good enough anymore. They're always desperate, hopeless, endless games that neither of us every win because we always hurt ourselves one way or another. 

"Sometimes it's because he accidentally shoves me too hard, or because I'll trip him by accident and he'll fall and we'll stop. We always end up hurting each other. This game with you was much more fun. I didn't have to think that if I lose I'll end up being left behind, or that you might somehow magically rebreak my ribs or make me run so hard my legs collapse. I played the game this time because it was so much fun to see someone who loves playing. I don't want anyone to take that from you, okay? I don't think I've ever seen someone so passionate about basketball like you since Daiki walked away from games and Akashi snapped." 

Red eyes are widening and staring at me with shock. "I never played this game because it's fun. I wish I'd gotten into the game because I love it. Instead, I did something stupid and played basketball to get back at the coaches that used me, and the teammates that left me when I took injuries for them. I got tired of having to dictate everyone's every move so they could get all the victories they expected. I did something stupid and joined Teiko's team so I could finally be the worst at something and have to push myself once more.

"Kuroko could probably go on for hours about all the mistakes I made, and how I was always angry and I never wanted to play. I was an absolutely horrible teammate to have, and I'm ashamed of that. I regret joining basketball every time I think of all those things I did because of my anger and my poor sportsmanship and my lack of skill and my poor determination. 

"I don't know how you got into basketball. I don't know if you struggled, or if it was easy for you. I don't know if you always played this game, or if you picked it up recently like Kise. I don't know if this game has always been fun for you, and I don't know if you've ever thought of quitting, like I always did. What I do know, though, is that you have fun  _now_. The way you play basketball reminds me of Daiki when he loved to play. There was always this huge smile, this brightness in his eyes. Daiki is only like me in the sense that he got tired of being good at something. He hasn't faced good opposition for so long that Daiki can no longer remember what it's like to play desperately, like I end up doing. He doesn't know how it feels to struggle to win, or what it's like to give something your all." 

Red eyes are bright and alive and eager to compete. "I don't know you at all, Kagami. I know your written English sucks, and I know your teammates like you. I know Kuroko has faith in your abilities, and I know that you're loudmouthed and easily irritated and hotheaded. At the same time, Kagami, I think I know you very well. Playing with you is enough to tell me that you've practically poured your heart and soul into playing basketball. You're sincere and honest and maybe a little too easy to read, but you've got a lot of potential that I'd absolutely love to see in a game. You're somehow rough and gentle at the same time, and you're insanely stubborn when you refuse to give up." 

Red eyes are smirking with cocky confidence. "Don't think I'll let you beat me so easily just because of one game of one on one, Heights." For some reason, finally hearing my last name spoken fully sends me over the moon with joy. My chest feels unusually warm and fuzzy, a most un-Alex-like sensation. "We're going to beat you at Inter High, and you can just watch us take first place." I stand toe to toe with the tall ace, grinning up at his nearly arrogant, slightly childish happiness. I resist the urge to hug him. 

"Don't say things like that easily, Kagami." I say with a grin. "I might just hold ya to it and get my hopes up." 

"I'll guarantee it for you, if you want." He says with an equally wide grin. "Since I lost, you better tell me what you want before I challenge you again." I pause for a few minutes, thinking and pacing thoughtfully as Kagami eyes me. "What should I ask from you? Can't be easy, otherwise it'll be too boring. Need something interesting..." My eyes widen as I realize that my answer is right before my eyes. I switch to English instantly. 

 _"Taiga Kagami, are you sure you want to know what I want?"_ The redhead gives me a predatory smile. 

 _"I lost, didn't I? Besides, I got a feeling this'll be good."_ He replies. I grin. 

" _I have two things I want you to do. If you want to beat us, you need more practice. I'll play one on one with you, but not because I'm pitying you. I like playing you. You give me something to look forward to."_ The redhead nods, narrowing his eyes as Aida looks at us with a frown marring her brow. 

 _"What's the second part?"_ I grin and whisper in Kagami's ear, watching as his eyes widen and a smirk cuts across his face.  _"Oh? I thought that was already decided."_

" _Do your best."_ I say with a grin.  _"I can play you on Saturdays. Give me your phone."_ The redhead looks at me suspiciously before handing it over. Japanese phones are the weirdest things ever. I mean it in the nicest way possible, but I hate flip phones. They just make me angry since I don't see the purpose in wasting all that energy just to answer a call. I type in my number under my name, writing it in English since katakana is annoying and I like the way the letters look. I send a fast text to myself, close the phone, and give it back. 

"Aida-san, tell me if you play Kirisaki Daiichi." I say with narrowed eyes. "We just played them recently. I'd like to see how they play once more." Kuroko looks a little startled. 

"Are they the ones responsible for...?" I nod my head. 

"That Hanamiya sent me straight to the hospital afterward." I say with a rather pissed expression. "He's the only reason I haven't been playing recently, and it totally pisses me off just thinking about it." I turn back to Kagami. "I gotta go since Daiki's waiting. Don't disappoint me, okay?" I give the taller boy a grin, say goodbye to Kuroko, and leave.  _I'm counting on you._


	16. Chapter Sixteen

The arcade is incredibly noisy when I walk in, as it usually is. The sounds of fake gunshots and electronic whines intermingle with the yells of excited students and the sighs of weary adults. The lights from various machines cast strange shadows on their respective players' faces, giving them an overly-mask-like appearance that looks unusually unnatural. The windows are all blooming with light that doesn't reach deeper than a few feet from the glass itself due to the obnoxious mash of moving bodies. Some strange crappy rock plays from the ceiling.

I always end up getting lost in the arcade. Daiki might be tall, and if he were with me I'd be able to follow him with ease, but I'm shorter than many of the people who frequent this place. The scent of fast food and sweat taints the air. It's time for the afternoon rush, I suppose, when students file in to drain their wallets of their money. Daiki's a pretty frequent customer here on weekdays, although he doesn't like this place on the weekends. He claims it's because all the girls come in with their boyfriends and make the place reek of cheap perfume, but I think it's because we always get separated until I'm hopelessly lost or because I'm always at work when he'd rather go here. It's not really any of my business.

"Hey, girl! Got a few spare tokens?" I turn to the offensive voice, eyeing the man who looks to be a bit too old for the crowd here. My lips twitch into a scowl.

"No." I reply politely. "I'm not here to play. I have no tokens." The man gives me a disbelieving look.

"Nobody comes here without the intention of playing." He says dubiously, coming a few steps closer. I face him a little more. He's definitely shorter than Daiki, but still taller than me, with broad shoulders and long legs. I narrow my eyes slightly.

"I do." I say flatly. "Excuse me." I dip my head and push my way into the crowd again, weaving between some slightly buzzed adults and a few hyper teens. I scan the crowd for Daiki, knowing he'll be somewhere since it has that racing game he's so fond of. Unfortunately, my search is interrupted once a hand grabs my wrist. My head snaps about fast enough to cause whiplash. I'm almost certain it's Daiki- until the unwelcomed face of the older man comes into view once I rake my gaze up the unwelcomed arm. "Please let go."

"You have a few tokens. Give me one." The delusional man insists, gripping my wrist in his painfully tight grasp. I try to tug my arm free. My gaze darkens with rage.

"I do not. Let me go. I'm becoming very angry." My eyes are narrower now, slanted with fury and darkened with irritation. The group of students behind me mutters about how they can't focus properly on their game. I resist the urge to call Daiki and instead glare at the guy who just _won't stop asking for things I don't have._ My temper threatens to flare.

"All I want is _one_ token!" He says loudly, causing several heads to turn and a flurry of disgusted whispers to follow after. My lip curls in distaste.

"I don't have any tokens, man. Go buy yourself some more. I would've given you one by now if I had any on me." The man grumbles something I don't catch before lurching toward me. My eyes widen rapidly before I drive myself through the crowd, texting a hurried message to Daiki. _By the racing games. Strange man won't leave._

My phone doesn’t inform me of any replies as I continue to try to shake this guy. Just as I'm just about sure he's ready to drag me back to the games I'd just left, I run straight into a tall male. More specifically, one with blue hair and rather irritated eyes. _Aomine Daiki._ He looks really irritated, actually.

"Someone's bothering you?" Daiki asks, glancing down at me. I turn and point at the startled looking man. "What do you want?"

The man opens and closes his mouth like a fish out of water; his eyes are round in surprise and his brow is drawing into a frown. "Token." he squeaks. His voice has raised several octaves, and I can't keep a thread of amusement from curling in my stomach. Daiki looks at me.

"I don't have any! I told him that twice!" I say determinedly. "He won't believe me."

"She doesn't have any." Daiki tells the man, glaring down at him. "How about you leave her alone?" Daiki's "suggestion" is more of an order with no wiggle room. I would personally recommend not pissing the blue-haired prodigy off. His temper is nothing short of _terrifying._ The man grimaces and nods.

"Of course. My apologies." He says suddenly, his demeanor changing completely in a matter of seconds. My eyes narrow in irritation before I look away and risk a glance at Daiki. What I see actually shocks me this time around. Daiki looks completely livid. Angry, narrow eyes with burning coals instead of blue. A frown so intense it puts all his previous ones to shame. Daiki looks like he's on his way to a grade A temper tantrum, and judging by the audible grinding of his teeth, it's gonna get messy if he doesn't calm down.

"Daiki." I say quietly, "Let's go, okay?" The bluenette appears not to have heard me. "Daiki?" I tug on the hem of his shirt carefully, trying not to risk any unintentional damage to my face. With a huff, the tall boy grabs my wrist, turns on his heel, and storms away, dragging me with him as I struggle to keep up. "D-Daiki..."

For such an angry expression, Daiki's grip is surprisingly gentle. Sure, it's firm and doesn't let me escape, but it isn't tight enough to hurt at all, or twist my skin uncomfortably. _I guess he's grown a bit._ "You really just attract trouble, don't you?" Daiki says, glancing back at me as we continue forward. I shift uncomfortably.

"It's not like I mean to. I stand out here since I'm not Japanese." I reply, glancing away. Daiki's sigh is audible even in the din of the arcade.

"Be more careful, Alex." A feeling of embarrassment creeps over me with incredible speed, making my face redden.

"Sorry."

"Stop apologizing."

"Sorry."

"Alex!"

"Sor-" Daiki spins around faster than I can track and clamps a hand over my mouth, looking both amused and annoyed. My face reddens even more as he leans closer to me.

" _Seriously_ , Alex." Then Daiki flicks my forehead and I jolt backward, rubbing the offended spot.

"Fine, fine. I get it." I reply with embarrassment. I try to get my face to return to a normal color. "That guy was really persistent though..."

"That guy was a creep that kept staring at your boobs." Daiki says flatly, dragging me at a more humane pace. I feel my cheeks flush once more. My mind races for something to say, but my tongue won't form the words. I say nothing and listen to the buzz of afternoon life. The noises of the arcade push the encounter to the back of my mind.

"You looked really pissed back there." I say carefully, wondering if broaching the subject is conversational suicide.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He says, raising an eyebrow. I frown up at the tanned boy.

"Why _would_ you be?" I say with a slight scowl. "It's not like he was staring at you. Are you pissed because I probably ruined your game?" Daiki stares at me with shock written all over his face. Then he laughs, a low, rough, happy sound.

"You're really an idiot sometimes." He says, wiping tears from his eyes. "I am _never_ letting you live that down." I look at him in confusion before rolling my eyes.

"Whatever." I mutter, glancing away. My cheeks redden once more, irritating me. Daiki laughs once more before grinning down at me. "What do you wanna do?"

Daiki looks thoughtful. "Have you eaten?" I shake my head. "Let's grab something, then." My lips curve into a smile.

"Sure." Daiki's hand slips onto my wrist again as I walk beside him once more. "Have you been here long? Sorry if I kept you waiting."

"Nah, I got a game in just before I got your text." Daiki replies, glancing at me. "You look like you just played."

"Kagami asked for one on one. It took longer than expected." I respond, stifling a yawn. "It got interesting for a while, but I got bored in the end, like always." Daiki glances at me with a strange look on his face.

"Why bother playing?" Daiki asks, his voice tight with something rather dark and rough. I sigh.

"I saw how excited he was and couldn't help it." I reply with hooded eyes. "He has potential... but I don't know if he'll tap into it." I can't help the disappointment that taints my words. Daiki glances at me with yet another strange look on his face. Silence pursues us for a while longer.

I grab a burger and a soda from the arcade snack bar and join Daiki at the tall tables with their fancy-schmancy swivel chairs that don't adjust properly. My stomach rumbles appreciatively. "Anyway," Daiki says with amusement as I sip my altogether too icy drink, "you still have your bobby pins in." I blink with surprise before laughing.

"How did I forget to take them out?" I say with equal amusement, pulling out the bobby pins and my ponytail carefully.

"Four." Daiki stares at the number of pins. "He was a four-pin problem?" My lips curve into a smile.

"Yeah, before he tired out. After than he dropped down to a two-pin problem." I clip the pins to my shirt collar. "That determination of his almost makes him a five-pin problem." Daiki sits back and smirks lazily.

"Now I want to test him out." Daiki says with an interested gleam in his eyes. "Of course, it's your first game coming back from what, a month without moving much? Your standards are skewed." I sigh.

"Yeah, they are. I got tired too easily, so I need to take up running again. Before he would probably be a three-pin problem." I say with a sigh. "Oh, well. I'll get back into the groove of things pretty quick. I always do." Daiki nods slightly, wincing visibly.

"Anyway, you didn't have any problems coming over here?" I shake my head a couple times, wondering why Daiki's acting out of character to this degree.

"Did ya wanna play any games?" I ask, balling up the wrapper my burger came in and continuing to sip my drink. "You normally play a few, don't you?" Daiki shrugs.

"I'm not really interested in playing any games today." He says lazily. "The people are really annoying today." I give the bluenette a small smile.

"You always find them annoying." I reply easily, laughing slightly.

"Fine. _More annoying than usual."_ Daiki corrects, giving me an amused glare. "It's boring, though, when it's like this." I nod my head slightly, scanning the arcade for anything that might capture our interest.

"Hey, aren't those games supposed to be impossible?" I ask, pointing at a crane game. "I don't think I've ever seen someone actually get anything out of those stupid things." Daiki follows the direction I'm pointing in and gives me a crooked smirk.

"Ready for a challenge?"  

"Look- dude no- I'm- done! I'm so done!" I yell, kicking the side of the machine as I drop the stupid stuffed animal for what feels like the millionth time. I grind my teeth and try to suppress an angry growl. "It takes my money and promises me the damn thing before dropping it _right_ before I get it!" Daiki laughs sadistically behind me.

"Outta the way, short stuff. Time to let a professional play." I swallow my irritation and bang my head against the glass.

"Fine. You do it." I throw my hands up in the air and walk away a couple steps before coming back to observe Daiki's so-called 'playing skills.' His first try goes as anticipated. The claw reaches down to grab an especially interesting stuffed animal I don't recognize, and gives us false hope as it whines its way over to the drop area. Halfway there, the animal slips, falling awkwardly onto the other toys as it smiles at us creepily. Daiki curses.

The second try is a near-perfect repeat of the first, only we get slightly closer to the drop area. The third try is a complete and utter failure as the crane fails to pick anything up. The fourth try is by far my favorite. Up goes a yet another animal, this time a bear. The crane grasps it firmly, whirring and whining with hidden malice as it approaches the drop zone. The bear makes it halfway over the barrier. _Halfway._ Half the bear is tangled in some stuffed octopus, and the other half reaches over into the abyss. We both groan and swear at the machine in response.

We're down to our last hundred yen when we try for the last time. "Don't fail me now." I warn, rubbing the coin between my palms. "This is the last of my money." Daiki nods.

"Same here." He says with a groan, pushing the coin into the slot forcefully. "Gotta get it this time." I watch Daiki's turn with every fiber in my body. Down goes the crane claw, three-pronged and rubber tipped. It picks up a rather adorable animal this time, but the smudging of the thick glass doesn't let me see what it is very clearly. Up it goes, dangling precariously from the grasp of the machine. A tail and two hind legs swing from side to side.

When I look at Daiki for the first time in three tries, I see nothing but concentration. _He must really want to get this, huh?_ My lips curve slightly in a smile at his strange boyish determination. I go back to watching the crane. I cross my fingers on one hand and watch as the small, slightly squished animal almost drops. It barely manages to cling to the crane. My eyes flicker between the animal itself and the mirror behind it that holds Daiki's reflection. I haven't seen Daiki look this determined since the last time we played one-on-one. It's really an expression I enjoy. Intensity suits Daiki better than anyone else.

I'm shocked, very, very, _very_ shocked, when the bundle of fur drops neatly into the drop box and doesn't hang itself on the edge to taunt us. My eyes widen, and my mouth forms an "O" of astonishment. I look at Daiki in awe. "You got it!" I say excitedly. "You actually got it!" The blue-haired wunderkind crouches to retrieve the animal toy and pulls out a very fuzzy, very huggable black cat. We both look at it in surprise for a few minutes.

"For you." He says, thrusting it into my hands. The taller boy looks away and turns beet red. My face flushes with equal vigor.

"T-Thanks." I try to keep from hiding my face behind my hands as I clutch the black cat to my chest. I glance up at Daiki bashfully. "It's adorable." My cheeks flame once more.

"Sure." He replies. "It's warm in here, don't you think?" I smile anxiously.

"Now that you mention it, I agree." I reply with ease. Daiki nods for a few seconds before grasping my wrist once more.

"Outside. Let's go outside." I nod again as he leads me through the larger throngs of people, keeping me from getting lost. We somehow manage to escape the clutches of the crowd. The air is cool and welcoming when I step outside. I take a few deep breaths, drinking in the scent of car exhaust and city parks.

"Heights." A voice says, with shocking amounts of surprise. I nearly jump out of my skin at the sound of Kagami's voice.

"Kagami!" I reply with surprise, turning to look at the taller redhead with shock. "What are you doing here?"

"I have to walk down this street to get home." He supplies. I frown slightly and peer down the street.

"Really? Where do you live?" Kagami rattles off an address pretty quickly, so it takes me a few minutes to understand. "Wha-" Daiki suddenly scowls at the redhead, who scowls back with equal vigor. "Kagami, you literally live one apartment down from me." We stare at each other with wide eyes.

"Wow. Okay." He says after a few moments. "Are you going home? I'll walk with you." I glance at Daiki.

"Sorry, Alex and I are gonna shoot some hoops." The bluenette says suddenly, tossing an arm around my shoulders. I don't bother to point out that we don't have a ball with us, and that we're completely out of cash once more.

"With what?" Kagami asks, raising a pronged eyebrow curiously. "You gonna shoot pebbles or something?" Daiki just stares at Kagami.

"Alex, let's g-" My leg does it's cute little _I think I'll just collapse on you_ thing as a resounding crack sounds from my ankle. I flinch. "Was that...?"

"Yes." I say instantly, shifting all my weight to one foot as Daiki grabs the back of my shirt in an attempt to keep me from falling. "Landed funny during one on one. Forgot to stretch." Daiki sighs.

"C'mon." He says, crouching down. "Let's go." I crawl onto Daiki's back and hook my legs around his waist with my arms about his neck.

"Sorry, Daiki." I say with a long-suffering sigh. "I guess I went overboard during one on one today." Daiki grumbles something about me playing stupid games with idiots before I hiss a warning in his ear to be polite. Kagami glances at me with a frown on his face.

"What's wrong? Did you hurt yourself, or...?" I laugh slightly.

"I hurt my ankle a while back, and it hasn't really been the same since. When I overwork myself or don't care for it properly, it likes to give out and make me look stupid." I say with some more laughter and a rather self-deprecating smile. "Gets a good laugh, though, when it's timed right."

"I don't see how it's so funny." Kagami says with a scowl. "Didn't that hurt?" I shrug one shoulder as Daiki begins to walk, Kagami remaining side by side with him.

"Sometimes. Depends on what I did." I reply with a frown. "This one did just a little bit, since I think I got it when I landed from a jump or something." Kagami gives me a critical glance. "Don't look at me like that." I say, hiding my face in the side of Daiki's neck. "It's not like it's broken or something." Kagami doesn't reply.


	17. Chapter Seventeen

My chest constricts as I hiss in pain. The couch has never felt so comfortable, not even when I've pulled all-nighters or come crawling home with bruises blooming across my skin. Daiki ties an ice pack around my ankle in place with an old dishrag. "Sorry." He mutters, lifting my legs and placing them in his lap. "You really shouldn't be so careless." I wince slightly and cover my eyes with my arm. 

"I got excited. I should've thought it through some more." I say with a sigh. Kagami didn't try to get into my apartment tonight, something I'm grateful for. I hate pain, but more than that, I hate people seeing me in pain. Gentle hands rest against my shins. "It'll be fine in just a little bit." 

"Liar." Daiki mutters, reclining deeper into the couch as I breathe as evenly as possible. "Just admit it isn't okay." I clench my jaw for a minute.

"What makes you think that I haven't already admitted that?" I thought it was obvious. With a sigh, I yawn widely. "I wanna play." Daiki snorts. 

"The only time you actually end up playing is when we go at it." Daiki says with an irritated tone of voice. "Besides, it would be stupid for you to play when you couldn't walk home by yourself." 

"I could've done it!" I say indignantly. "You didn't put me down even after I said it was fine!" The bluenette sighs loudly as I sit up and flip so my head rests in his lap. "It's fine, though, since you're comfy." He then snorts in amusement. It's always like this with Daiki- relaxed and teasing and sometimes unusually intense, but everything's open, shared. There's no point in beating around the bush since Daiki's an obtuse idiot and I don't understand idioms well. If we have something to say, it's best just to say it straight out. 

Daiki's fingers grab a strand of my hair and twist it for a few minutes as I watch him silently. "At least you know one of your neighbors." He says after a few minutes more, releasing the strands to pick new ones to twist. I smile slightly.

"Yeah, I guess. I wonder how he never noticed earlier, since he's been in here for tutoring..." I reply. "It doesn't matter, I guess." Daiki responds with a grunt, although I have no idea what it's supposed to mean. I run my fingers over the black toy's head, messing with the ears using my fingertips. I fall asleep in Daiki's lap. 

I wake up in bed, and just in time to slam my alarm off with great violence. It gives a cracked groan of agony before shutting up promptly. With bleary eyes, I roll out of bed and shake Daiki awake. His futon is usually right next to my bed since I don't have an extra room, and I trust Daiki not to pull anything while I'm sleeping. I'm usually a light sleeper anyway. "Daiki... school. Gotta get up, yeah?" I say drowsily, rubbing my eyes. 

Daiki's eyes are glazed over with sleep. He gives me this strange look, no doubt due to his sleepiness, and tugs me to him. "Five minutes." He groans, nestling his head against my neck. "You're warm." I sigh and don't bother struggling free. Daiki's grip is vice-like, as always. 

"I was just sleeping. Of course I'm warm." I reply, trying not to fall asleep again. "We need to get to school, Daiki. We missed all our classes yesterday." 

"So? It's not like we can't spare five minutes." I frown slightly at the bigger boy. 

"Five minutes. That's it." I say with a groan. "But just five." Daiki doesn't reply and instead opts to snore against the side of my neck. I wriggle a bit until I'm more comfortable. Five minutes pass by more slowly than I thought they would, but they pass in time. I squirm free and shake Daiki again. "C'mon, Daiki. Time for school." 

In the end, we arrive with barely two minutes to spare. We're lucky we made it at all, actually. The two of us ran like hell whenever we'd normally walk. My chest is heaving as I try to catch my breath. I slump into my seat with a heavy sigh. "We made it." I say as I continue to wheeze, trying to not sound like I'm dying. "That's the fastest I've ever run to school in my life." 

"Yeah." Daiki says, panting behind me. "Never wanna do that again. Not worth the extra five minutes." I pretend to get offended at Daiki's smug look. Class starts without a hitch. The school day passes with excruciating slowness as I continually glance at the clock every thirty seconds. It seems like practice will never come around again. 

 

"What? What do you mean I'm not allowed to practice?" I say furiously, resisting the urge to stop my foot childishly. "It's fine if I play! Why?" The pinkette stares at me with blank pink eyes, glancing down at her clipboard. 

"We've decided it's best for you not to play until Interhigh, which is coming very, very,  _very_ soon." Satsuki says evenly. "We want you to be in tip-top shape, so we're eliminating any chances of you getting yet another injury by keeping you out of practice." 

"You  _do_ realize I'm fully capable of keeping myself healthy, right?" I snarl, standing chest-to-chest with the pinkette. "I can play, and I fully intend to." Pink eyes stare at me without wavering. 

"You will not be playing until Interhigh." She says firmly, frowning. 

"I did not come in here to be told not to practice by my own manager." The words come out much more venomously than I'd intended, but at least she gets the point and narrows her eyes. 

"Hai-chan... We’re not denying you this because you did something wrong. It's not a punishment. We want you to stay healthy." I can feel my eyebrow twitch in frustration. 

"I came here to play. Hell, I was  _sent_ here to play. What makes you think Akashi would approve of this?" The pinkette drops her gaze. "Akashi told me to play, and I intend to do so." It's pretty low of me to bring up Akashi and try to use him against Satsuki. It's lower than low. I shouldn't be doing it, yet I am. Desperation runs through my blood like a poison I can't get rid of. 

"Akashi does not go to this school. He isn't your captain anymore. You don't have to play for him, or by his rules. I, however, am still your manager. I think it's best for this team if you don't play until the games at Interhigh." The silence in the gym is so intense you could hear a pin drop. The tension is so thick you could cut it with a knife, take a chunk of it, and literally sell it. My eyes narrow significantly. 

"Akashi may not go here, and he may not be my captain at this point in time, but he is the reason I began playing this stupid game, and is the reason I continue to play. You're my manager, and there is no mistaking that. You always have been. I don't doubt your ability to make decisions, and I don't think your thinking is generally flawed, but you're making a mistake in keeping me from practicing." I reply, watching pink eyes widen. "I am not Japanese, so I did not grow up thinking I should go with the flow. I have no issue with going against your wishes or being blunt. I am not Kuroko, who is selfless and a team player. I am not Murasakibara, who you can order fairly easily. I am not easily bribed, like Daiki. I am not as patient or logical as Midorima, and I cannot influence things the way Akashi does.

"Remember that while you managed those Miracles, it was not you who managed me. The only person I take orders from is Akashi. You cannot order me to stop doing something, and you cannot bribe me into doing it. I will not listen to your logic, and saying it's for the team no longer has a meaning to me. Do not think that you can deal with me the same way you dealt with the others in the past." 

"I've never said you were like the others, Hai-chan, but dealing with you is getting more and more difficult. You listened to me back then, but you won't listen to me now? I don't understand why you're questioning this, or why you won't understand why I'm doing this. This team wants to win. You not playing is the best way to do so, since you've been out of commission for a while now." Satsuki says, narrowing her eyes as my temper flares. "If you won't listen to your own manager, whom will you listen to?" 

"Why don't you try listening to yourself, Satsuki? You're telling a player who hasn't touched a basketball in a long time to continue to let their skills rust until the next game or whenever Interhigh is. Can you not see how backward your logic is?" 

"You always ignore all the factors I'm taking into account. Stress yourself too much, and you won't be able to play properly. Does that not worry you?" I try to subdue my temper once more.

"I am more than capable of dealing with stress, thank you very much. Your vote of confidence is greatly appreciated." I reply icily. "Thank you very much for underestimating me. This always happens. It just brings great bouts of joy into my life. I'm so happy I could dance." 

"Hai-chan..." 

"See you later, Momoi-san. I won't play, just like you want." I exit the gym in a rage, heading for where they keep the athletic equipment so I can use the treadmills. It doesn't take long for me to change and set the treadmill to a brisk pace so I can stomp my rage into the rubber surface below me. 

_I just want to play. Is that so bad? Is that so much to ask? To play? Daiki doesn't play, Satsuki won't let me, and I only play with Kagami once a week. I want to practice... I want a challenge. I want to get tired and lose and feel motivated and defeated at the same time. What can I do? I doubt Seirin will beat us at Inter High, if they make it in, but... I'd kind of like them to, so I have an actual goal I'm trying to achieve._

"Alex? What're you doing in here? I thought you went to _practice."_  Daiki practically spits the word out like it's some sort of poison. I run a little faster. 

"Momoi told me not to practice until Inter High, whenever that is, so I'm doing this." I reply frigidly. 

"Geez, don't get your panties in a knot." Daiki says with an amused sigh, leaning against the machine on my left. "It's not like practice would help you anyway, you know." I shoot the bluenette a very unappreciative glare. 

"Doesn't mean I don't wanna go. I'm tired of lazing about doing nothing. I wanna play..." Daiki rolls his eyes. 

"What about that Kagami guy? He seemed to amuse you." The rude prodigy suggests, crossing his arms over his chest. 

"If I play him more than once a week I doubt he'll be able to practice properly." I say with irritation. 

"Give me your phone." Daiki says with a scowl, snatching it from my gym bag. 

"D-Daiki! Don't go on my phone, you idiot! What do you plan on doing?" I reply indignantly. "That's rude!" 

"Eh, you actually have his number?" Daiki says with surprise as he clicks around on my phone. I glare at him. 

"He gave it to me after I played him." I say as I continue running at a fast-paced jog. Daiki continues to click, so I have to assume he's texting someone. "Who are you messaging?" 

"The redheaded idiot." Daiki replies testily. "Hopefully he'll amuse you long enough to keep you from killing Satsuki." 

"Give me that, you stupid blueberry." I say with irritation. I look through my sent box to find what is likely a very offensive message. Instead, it's surprisingly normal.  _Up for a game of one-on-one? -Hai_. I glance at Daiki. "At least you're capable of texting like a normal person." Daiki yawns and chucks my empty water bottle into the trashcan across the room with practiced ease. 

My phone vibrates in my hand.  _Yeah, what time? -Kagami._ I almost drop the damn thing in an attempt to not fall off the treadmill. "Gimme that." Daiki says, snatching it from my hand. "You're going to kill yourself if you try texting and running. You're no good at multitasking like that." I puff my cheeks out in irritation. "This okay?"  _As soon as you're out of practice. I'll meet you at Seirin. -Hai._

"Yeah, thanks." I say with a sigh. "Don't you wanna play?" 

"It's not fun if we both play with the same toy." Daiki says with a roll of his eyes. "I'll mess with him later. I don't see what Tetsu thinks is so great about him." I resist the urge to tell Daiki he'd see it if he wasn't so blind. 

"He's fun to play." I say with failing breath. "It's fun to mess around and see how he reacts." Blue eyes latch onto my face as I continue running. 

"You better get going if you wanna play with your new toy." I slow the treadmill so I can cool down my muscles and not suffer from stiffness. 

"You can't call people toys, Daiki." I scold, looking at him with a half-assed attempt at a severe expression. "They don't exist just for amusement." 

Daiki shrugs. "When it comes to basketball, they're all just toys. They're worth is determined by how much they can amuse me." I almost feel like slugging the guy, but instead finish off my second water bottle and toss it in the trash. 

"Maybe Kagami will amuse you." I say. "Maybe not  _now_ , but later he will. I'm sure of it." The bluenette rolls his eyes with disbelief once moreas my phone vibrates.  _Practice is over in an hour or so. You sure? It's pretty far from Touou. -Kagami._ I laugh a little at that. 

 _I could use a jog. See ya there. -Hai._ "See ya, Daiki. I hope he doesn't disappoint today." With a wave and a promise to grab some takeout on the way home, I start jogging for Seirin. Of course, it takes longer than anticipated to jog all the way to Seirin. I end up taking a whole bunch of shortcuts and crossing through alleys I'd normally avoid, but as soon as I start to flat out sprint, I know I shouldn't be _too_ late. Of course, it would've been best to not be late at all, but a mere five minutes is okay, right? Especially when I'm running like hell, right? I suppose it is, because Kagami's just getting out onto the street as I round the corner and slow to a jog. 

"Kagami!" I call, waving slightly as my jog slows to a walk. "Sorry I'm late. It took a little longer than I thought it would. My bad." Kagami looks both amused and slightly miffed, but it looks like I haven't done any harm. 

"Don't worry about it. I just got out of practice, so you aren't late at all." He replies. "Did you seriously jog the whole way?" I laugh with embarrassment. 

"Actually, I did my jogging in the gym earlier, so I sprinted instead..." I reply sheepishly. "I haven't done any cardio workouts in a long time." 

"Oi, don't tire yourself out before we even start!" Kagami says, ruffling my hair roughly. I yelp and swat the hand away as best I can. 

"I won't, I won't!" I reply, dodging the hand. "Oh, hey Kuroko!" The familiar blue-haired shadow startles the bejesus out of Kagami, who grows very irritated. 

"I-Idiot! You're going to give me heart attack!" Kagami says with every ounce of annoyance possible. 

"Hello, Hai-chan." Kuroko says, completely ignoring the babbling dunce beside him. "You're going to play again today?" I nod eagerly. 

"Yep! I'm going to play Kagami as soon as we get to the nearest court!" I reply with a smile. "Satsuki won't let me practice, so I decided I'd play one on one games." I send a silent thank you to Daiki, wherever the hell he is. Probably at another arcade, or reading the skin mags he hides in my room when he thinks I don't notice. I smile wider. 

"Let's get going." Kagami says impatiently, tapping my arm. I glance at the redhead and nod. 

"Of course." I supply easily. I look to Kuroko to see if he'll tag along, but he seems to be thinking of other things. "Every time I remember you speak English I keep wanting to call you by your first name. It's so weird to call everyone by their last name..." Kagami laughs.

"It took me a while to adjust to the way people do things in America, and when I came back here I had to adjust again." Kagami says with amusement. "When are you going back?" I shift uneasily and clear my throat to ease my perpetual awkwardness. 

"Ah... I don't think I  _can_ go back, to be honest." I reply sheepishly. "I got disowned for some reason, and then my citizenship got revoked. I don't actually belong to a country right now... I guess I'm hoping to apply here." Kagami looks surprised. 

"How did that even happen?" I scratch the back of my head. 

"My family and I aren't on good terms. I've been here since seventh grade, I think, on an exchange program. Once eighth grade hit and I wasn't showing any signs of wanting to come back, I guess it was the last straw." I answer, glancing up and down the street as we cross an intersection. "I suppose I don't really feel like a part of the family anymore. Just a person who shares their last name and some genes." 

Kagami gives me a look that I recognize all too well. "Oi, don't think I'm unhappy or anything. Everything's the same as it's always been, so don't look at me like that." I say testily, walking toward the streetball courts and taking the basketball from Kagami. "I hate it when people look at me like that." 


	18. Chapter Eighteen

Red eyes with the intensity of a wild animal. A muscular frame that has more than enough power to block my shots if I get careless. A temper that'll burst if I make light of his abilities. The desire to compete, to win and continue winning.

Sweat dripping down the side of his face, falling to the ground as he takes a step. His chest colliding with my side as I try to keep the ball away. Long arms that reach for what I cannot release. Heavy breathing that forces his chest to rise and fall rapidly. Determination oozing from every pore in his body. I grit my teeth. There has to be a way for me to escape the corner I've been pushed into. It doesn't make me very happy, but I begin to observe and note things in an effort to escape. I never was originally a basketball player.

I bounce the ball awkwardly out of his reach, and out of mine, before sliding past the tall redhead and snatching the ball back. I barely manage to shoot before Kagami's right back at it again, pushing the limits of my aching legs. I don't want to lose. Not here. Not now. Not to anyone. I might not be going all out, but I'm still tired. I shouldn't have run as much as I did, especially if I wanted to play today. I hadn't been planning to see Kagami again until Saturday, but this is fine with me. It's a good opportunity to push the limits of my physical abilities.

My heart is racing now as adrenaline builds in my blood. There's no way I'm going to lose to Kagami. If I can hold my own effectively against Daiki, I can sure as hell beat this redhead who hasn't even gotten into the Zone yet. I'm not infallible. I'm tired, and sore, and weary, but I'm more than ready to push this body beyond the limit to win, even if this is only a friendly match. Somehow, the red in Kagami's eyes tells me that he knows this, too. I always did dislike my competitive streak.

Kagami changes his stance slightly. I don't know if it's a conscious decision or not, but it's to my benefit. It's a little awkward, not at all natural, and too low for him to run properly. "Going lower won't help you." I say with narrowed eyes. "This is my territory. Games of height pose no challenge to me." Kagami's eyes widen as I race past him, dodging the awkward stretch of his arms with ease. I manage another basket.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Kagami asks as I double over slightly. My chest feels strange, and I can't identify what it is that I'm feeling. I nod my head.

"Of course." I reply, standing upright once more and giving the redhead an even stare. "Why wouldn't I be? I'm just playing basketball with you." Kagami gives me a doubtful glance before grabbing the ball from where it's rolled away.

"Let's take a break for a bit." Kagami suggests, narrowing his eyes slightly. I don't want to stop playing. I want to kick and claw and bite my way to another basket, but the aching of my lungs and the unsteady beating of my heart tell me that it's time to take a break. I grimace and look away.

"Fine, if that's what you want." I reply icily. Kagami gives a snort of amusement before grabbing the water bottles I'd taken from the nearest convenience store. He downs at least a quarter of it in a single gulp before screwing the lid back on and settling down onto the bench. I hesitantly join him, a sigh struggling to push past my lips. The sigh loses force and dissipates as I look up to watch the sky. After a while, I sip my water, breathing deeply as I calm back down.

I don't know why I suddenly got worked up. Maybe it was because I thought I might lose, even if it's a foolish fear. This is, or at least was, a friendly game of one on one. I can't use Kagami as a way to vent, even if it's him who makes me angry. I sigh silently in defeat, wondering if I should apologize to Kagami and Satsuki, and try to make it up to both of them somehow. I understand why she pulled me out of practice, although the logic is twisted and backward in every way I think about it. Satsuki is just worried about me, and all I did was throw that right back at her face, along with all my pent up frustration.

"You calmed down yet?" Kagami asks, downing yet another mouthful of tepid water. I turn to Kagami.

"Yeah, sorry. I don't know why I lost my temper, so I'm sorry if it seems like I took it out on you." I reply, stretching leisurely. "I got my head screwed on right, now. It won't happen again." Red eyes look at me with a calculating glint, narrowed and wondering if I should be believed. "You still wanna play?" Kagami's lips curl into a smile.

"Yeah, but I gotta get my homework done. The seniors will kill me if I fail any of my classes." I laugh with amusement.

"Understandable." I say with a grin. "I gotta make sure Daiki doesn't fail, or Satsuki really _will_ kill him this quarter. I'm kinda tired anyway. Let's call it a game for now." Kagami gives me a grin before standing with ease. I remain on the bench, watching him wearily.

"Oi, wanna go to Maiji Burger?" He asks, glancing down at me before awkwardly looking around the empty court. My eyes widen as I look up at the tall redhead. For a moment, I wonder if he's always looked this way- tall and bashful and predatory.

"Sure." I say after a heartbeat or two. "I'd love to." Kagami turns back to me as if startled before he grins once more and extends a hand to me. I grasp it gingerly, feeling the many years' worth of calluses on his hands rub against my wrist and palm. _It's warm... and gentle._ His grip is easy and firm, and somehow, trustworthy and reassuring. He pulls me up with ease.

The end of my ponytail swishes against the nape of my neck as I bounce up and down slightly. I grab my jacket and my backpack before gulping down some water. "Hey, Kagami, how'd you meet Kuroko?" I ask, slipping the jacket on before I have the chance to get chilled. "You two seem pretty close. Your teamwork is really amazing."

"Hm? Oh, through basketball." Kagami replies. "He's also in my class." I nod slightly, my lips curling into a smile.

"I thought so." I respond lightheartedly. "I'm glad you two get along. You're well suited for each other." Kagami gives me a strange glance as we continue to walk down the street. The sound of my shoes is silent compared to Kagami's footsteps. After a while, I notice that the distance between us has gradually becomes smaller and smaller, to a point where our arms will just barely brush past each other. My face is warm as I blush slightly at the sudden realization.

We walk into Maiji Burger chatting about how different teams are doing in the NBA and in baseball, which Kagami doesn't seem as interested about. His interest is piqued, though, when I mention that I can't swim but have been meaning to learn how. "I'll teach you, if you want."

"Really?" I ask in surprise, my eyes widening. Kagami nods a few times before ordering his meal. I order after him and move to pay, but he stops me.

"Ah, I got this." Kagami says, paying for my meal. I look at him in shock.

"T-Thanks." I say with surprise. I don't notice the unusual way the cashier looks at us, or the giggle she emits before she gives Kagami the receipt and hands me my meal. I take the food and follow him to the tables beside the windows.

For a while, all here is around us is the sound of other people chattering and crappy background music. Kagami is preoccupied with eating his million burgers, while my one is more than enough to grab my attention. My usual shake is replaced by a soda this time, which is probably best. Shakes make me feel sluggish afterward, and it's like liquid ice cream trickling into my stomach. Soda is much more water-like, so I don't get as lethargic. "So you really can't swim?" Kagami asks in surprise.

I nearly choke on a mouthful of french fries before I can breathe again. "Yeah." I say, trying not to wheeze from my short-lived dance with death. "I never liked water. I'd like to learn just so it's one less stupid way to die."

Kagami laughs in that unusually rough way of his before grinning. "Is that so? Well, I know the best way to do that." I raise an eyebrow in question before finishing off my burger before it gets cold.

"Really? I'll have to take your word for it." I reply with a smirk. "How would you know something like that anyway? I never took you for the swimming type." Kagami gives me another of his signature grins.

"I surfed when I was in LA." I blink in surprise.

"No way!" I reply with a grin. "For real? In the ocean?" Kagami nods proudly. "That sounds awesome!"

"Oi, you're from California, too. Didn't you swim in the ocean?" I laugh awkwardly before scratching the back of my head.

"I'm afraid of water." I say. "Actually, it's more like I'm afraid of the ocean and big bodies of water. I feel like I'm going to drown just by walking in the shallow parts." Kagami's eyes widen slightly.

"For real?" He asks, leaning slightly closer. I nod my head.

"Yeah, but don't tell Daiki! He doesn't know and I don't want him to make fun of me for it..." I reply hastily. "He might do something stupid, like dump water on my bed or throw me into a pool or take me to that river near the subway station..." Kagami's face tells me something is amiss.

"What is it?" I ask, narrowing my eyes. "Did I say something, or-"

"You're coming with me." Kagami says as I reach for another over salted fry. Just as I move to stuff the small fragment of heaven into my mouth, Kagami snatches the rest of the carton and holds it high above my head. I blink with surprise.

"You should know that games of height are useless. I can jump as high as I want." I reply with a scowl. "Give me back my fries." Kagami gives me a boyish grin before darting from sight. With a growl pushing past my lips, I give chase, eyes narrowed in irritation. My stomach gives a grumble of hunger as I pick up my speed. I finally catch sight of Kagami's red hair as I turn left. I hope to god he hasn't dropped my fries, because he'll owe me a few meals if he has.

For all my running earlier today, I'm surprisingly energetic. Not enough to want to catch up to Kagami right away, but enough to maintain a good pace behind him, slowly gaining ground. It takes me a few minutes more to get within grabbing distance, and another step to _not_ fall head over heels as he makes a sharp right that nearly sends me crashing into a wall. He dashes indoors, and I have no choice but to follow the dimwit inside.

I dart down the hallway, toward a door with kanji I can't read, only to find myself in a rapidly darkening room. There's some shimmery stuff near the center that doesn't look too good, so I stick to the dark cement beneath my feet. "Kagami?" I call, listening intently. "You in here? This place is kinda creepy..." A crash from behind me nearly makes me jump right out of my skin. "K-Kagami?"

My eyes adjust barely enough for me to see that the cement is flat and there are windows up near the roof. I can see a few benches well enough to not bump into them. The faint scent of fries barely reaches my nose. "Kagami, this isn't funny anymore." I say nervously. "I can't see at all..."

A few scuffling noises sound on the opposite side of the room. I move a little closer, and shiver as cool air rises from below. "K-Kagami, enough already... I-I'm going to leave!" For a moment, just the smallest moment, I hear an intake of breath behind me. Before I can turn around, however, I'm slammed into the shimmering substance I can now definitively call _water_.

Needless to say, I scream on impact. Bubbles escape my mouth before I clamp it shut and stiffen. _Water everywhere. I can't hear... I can't see... I can't breathe! How am I supposed to get to the top when all I can feel is this water sloshing past my fingers? I'm sinking! S-i-n-k-i-n-g! Kagami! Kagami, help me!_

For a moment, my heart feels like it's stopping as my feet tap the bottom of the pool. _I wish I could swim._ After a few heartbeats, I push up from the bottom, trying to reach the surface as I open my eyes slightly. The chlorine makes them burn and tear up as I look at my shimmering reflection. Then my head breaks the surface as my body tries to go limp, and I cough out mouthful after mouthful of water, my chest aching and my eyes burning as air finally hits my face.

I get pushed under water a few times as I try to tread water. It doesn't really work all that well, but I somehow manage to keep my nose out of the water as my lungs cease to burn. My limbs are tired from doing this, and after another handful of moments, they simply stop working. I slip under water for longer than my oxygen holds out. _It's kind of peaceful down here. Sorry..._

I have no idea what happened next, but one moment I'm thinking I'm going to actually drown, and the next I'm clinging onto Kagami with all my strength as I gasp for air. "Kaga...mi!" I choke out, my arms thrown about his neck and my legs wrapped around his waist. "Kagami..."

"Sorry, Alex." Kagami says as he stands in the water. "I didn't think you'd tire out like that. My bad."

"You i-idiot!" I say. "I didn't tell Daiki because he'd do something exactly like this, except he'd probably let me drown for a while longer." I can't fix this burning hunger for air. "I really... thought..." There's the longest silence as I try to finish my sentence, but I can't even finish the thought itself.

"I'm sorry." Kagami says as I rest my head on his shoulder. I shiver slightly as his breath ghosts over the back of my neck. All I can hear is my raspy breathing and the sloshing of the water on the pool's sides. "Will you try something?" I shake my head, holding onto the redheaded idiot tightly. "Just let go of me with your legs. You can still hold onto me with your arms, okay?"

I don't move for a long time as I summon the courage to release the silent boy. The water calms, my breathing slows, and I'm assured of the air that fills my lungs. Slowly, I let go of the redhead's waist and let my legs dangle toward the bottom of the pool. My toes brush his shins ever so slightly. "See? It's not so bad, is it, Alex?" Kagami says in a gentler tone of voice. I don't say anything, but I also don't pull my legs back up to his waist.

I know my fear of water is irrational. I know that if push came to shove I'd be able to reach something to cling to, but it doesn't make the feeling any better. Water is always too cold against my skin, slimy and unwanted, and it makes me lose track of what I'm touching and where parts of me are. It's stupid to be afraid of water. Yes, it can drown me, but it won't seep out of the ground just to crush me. Well, it won't in most cases.

My fear of water came when I was about five, I think. At least, that's what my parents told me. Before we moved out to California, we lived somewhere in Washington near a big river that I used to play in all the time. After a particularly heavy snow during winter, spring apparently melted ice in the mountains a little too quickly. We had a flash flood one day, and I had my typical bad luck and got swept away for a couple miles. I don't remember much of it other than water crushing me against trees and a couple rocks and the mud that filled my mouth, but I got caught in a tree and was lucky enough to be found after half a day.

Every since then all water has seemed slimy and suffocating, cold and cruel and unwanted as images of dark water whirling things away flash in the back of my head. "Alex?" Kagami says with concern, his arms wrapped around my waist. "Alex, are you okay?" I nod my head slightly as I grip him tighter. I think my arms might break if I hold Kagami any closer, but he isn't complaining. "I think that's enough this time. Next time I'll do it properly. I was taught to swim the right way, but a few of my friends were taught by pushing them into a pool and refusing to help them until they could swim out themselves. I thought it might work, but..."

I laugh slightly, refusing to budge as Kagami sloshes toward the edge of the pool. He lifts me up and places me on the edge of the pool before dragging himself out of the water. I try my best to help him out as I retract my legs from the water and wring my hair out. "I think it's the thought that counts." I say, glancing at him for a moment before trying to dry my shirt out a little. "At least, that sort of thing applies to you... it's a good thing I hav-" I scowl.

"We forgot them at Maiji." Kagami says dejectedly. I nod, water running down my face from my dripping bangs.

"Yep." Something warm and dry hits me in the head.

"Here. You can wear my jacket. Maiji isn't that far, so we can get our stuff and go home." I look at Kagami in surprise.

"But you-"

"Don't worry about it." Kagami says. "Just put it on." Hesitantly, I slip my arms into the sleeves of Kagami's jacket. It's too big and hangs off me awkwardly in various places, but it's warm and will keep the wind out.

"Thank you." I say, my face flushing.

"Don't mention it."


	19. Chapter Nineteen

My body shivers as cold air gusts past my legs. Kagami's jacket is a blessing in this weather. It would be cool enough if the wind wasn't here, but now it's just chilly. I can barely imagine how cold Kagami must be with no jacket. He's just as thoroughly soaked as I am. At least it's a good view. Kagami's shirt seems a little big on him, so it hides all the shapes underneath, but with his shirt soaked, I can get a decent view of what lies underneath. Yeah, yeah, call me what you will, but it's not like you wouldn't see it too, if you could.

"Kagami, are you sure you don't want your jacket? It's really cold out. You'll get sick." I say hesitantly, my arms bundled around my waist.

"Yeah. We're pretty close already, aren't we?" Kagami replies as the familiar signpost at the end of our block comes into view.

"I'm gonna feel guilty if you get sick because of me." I respond as we continue walking. Kagami shrugs.

"If I get sick then you're the one who brings me food." He says. "Sound fair?" I glance at the cheekily grinning redhead.

"Sure." I say with a half sigh. The wind isn't letting up at all, and Kagami's been kind enough to carry my backpack with his. Although I told him repeatedly that I could carry it myself and quickly change in Maiji's bathroom, he'd refused and basically ordered me to bathe at his place or mine so I could go straight into warm clothes. To be honest, his logic seems ridiculously backward, but I'm not going to fight with the guy who's lending me his jacket while he freezes his ass off.

I lean against Kagami suddenly, startling him. "What?" He asks, his red eyes unusually wide. I give him a smile.

"You look cold and won't take your jacket back, so I'm sharing some of my warmth with you." I try to hide the darkening color of my cheeks. Kagami doesn't really say anything in response, but he presses back slightly so I know that it isn't entirely unwanted. Kagami's side is really warm. I can feel heat from his skin seeping through the sides of the jacket.

As it turns out, Kagami ends up coming up to my apartment. As I enter the door, I call out Daiki's name, wondering why the apartment is so dark and if he's already eaten. After going through every room, I can say he isn't home. "I wonder where he went." I say with confusion as I scratch my head. "He's normally here." Kagami picks up a piece of paper from the kitchen counter.

"This is for you." He says, holding it out in my direction. I look at the paper dubiously. _Yo, Alex! Satsuki's parents invited me over for the weekend, so I won't be home until Sunday night! Text me if anything comes up. -Daiki_

To be honest, I'm surprised that Daiki didn't call me to tell me he'd be taking off. On the one hand, he's his own person and I'm not in charge of him, but on the other he's also my friend and housemate. I can't decide whether to be amused or to be a little miffed. In the end, I just choose to let it go and move on. "Well that answers things. You can take a bath first, since you lent me your jacket. Bathroom's at the end of the hall." I say to Kagami. He looks like he's going to protest, but must've thought twice about it since he walks down the hall.

I look through the cupboards to see if I have anything powdery to mix into hot water, but I haven't had things like that for quite a while. There's instant ramen, so I put some hot water to boil and put two containers down on the counter. It still hasn't come to a boil when Kagami comes out in a pair of my brother's old sweats and an oversized shirt. How do I have my brother's sweats you ask? I took them before I left. He's a tall boy. _Much_ taller than I am. Plus they're extra comfy.

"I can put your clothes through the dryer with mine." I say, noting the way Kagami looks at his still soaked clothing. "I'll take 'em after I get out." Kagami looks like he's about to say something, likely a rebuke for staying in these clothes for so long, but he's silent as he glances at the stove.

"Boiling water?"

"I can't think of anything to eat, so I'm making instant ramen." I reply to his questioning gaze. "It's better than nothing, so..." Kagami chuckles.

"Get changed and leave food to me. I got this." He says, brushing past me.

"Don't blow up my kitchen." I warn. Kagami laughs amusedly behind me as I continue down the hall, grabbing another towel and marching into the bathroom. The water is still hot and slightly steamy as I slip into it. Here, where I can feel the bottom and rest without the water moving or my head slipping under, the water is welcome. Knots in my shoulders loosen, and the soreness of my legs starts to ease. My wet hair clings to the side of my face as I push my bangs back and away from my face. "Mmmm."

I don't know how long I stay in the water, but it's more than long enough to return warmth and energy to my limbs. It's also enough to make me drowsy and lethargic. The water cools to a tepid warmth as I continue to soak. "Oi, Alex, are you okay?" Kagami calls through the door. He knocks a few times, startling me into alertness.

"Hm?" I reply sleepily. "Is that you, Kagami?" I sound a little, uh, buzzed, I suppose.

"Are you okay? You might've been in there too long..." Kagami says once more. I make some noise of affirmation. "Oi, if you're not out in another two minutes I'm gonna come in and get you." He warns. I snicker from the tub and cast my gaze toward the door. Who is he to think that he can tell me when to get out of the bathtub? After another minute, I get out and put on an oversized shirt and some shorts before attempting to dry my hair. It doesn't work.

"Alex?" Kagami says after the promised period of time.

"Hm?" I respond, trying to wake myself up. "Don't worry, I got out and I'm pretty much dressed." Kagami opens the door hesitantly.

"Hey, don't tell me you're _that_ tired." He says as he notes how I've flopped onto the floor and refused to budge. I offer him a series of swears in English, to which he laughs amusedly. "C'mon. You gotta eat before you go to sleep or you won't feel good tomorrow." With a roll of my eyes, I flop from my back to my stomach.

"Don't wanna move." I reply with a scowl. Kagami does try reasoning with me, I'll give him that much. Reasoning and reasoning and reasoning until I almost fall asleep. I guess he eventually has enough of his own reasoning, because he just shuts up, slings me over his shoulder rather haphazardly, and walks straight to the living room.

" _You should just eat and go to bed._ " Kagami says as I switch on the TV and grab a bowl of the somehow still steaming food in front of me.

" _You're probably right."_ I reply easily. A yawn parts my lips before I stare in surprise at the item before me. " _You actually made this? I'm seriously impressed."_ I know I had a burger just before we took at unfortunate dip in the pool, but this is seriously _impressive._ I'm not even kidding. My mouth waters and my eyes widen. " _Are you an angel or something?"_

 _"Shut up and eat your burger."_ Kagami replies as his cheeks turn red. I grin at him and take an enormous bite from the deliciousness before me. I swear, in my fifteen years of life, I have never, ever, _ever_ had a burger this great. _"You're a wonderful person."_ I say around my mouthful of food. Kagami just gives me a sly grin before eating his own food. I'm 110% grateful that there's no pepper anywhere in this.

"So are you really going to stick around here?" Kagami asks as I take his empty plate and rinse it in the sink. We're both full to bursting, and yawns interrupt my activities every few minutes.

"Hm? Why wouldn't I?" I reply with a frown. "I can't go back anyway. I don't think I can use my passport anymore." Kagami scratches his head.

"I don't get how you got into this situation." He replies. I shrug.

"Neither do I, to be honest." Bubbles fly as I wash the dishes. "It's done, and I can't really fix it, so it's best to just move on." The redhead raises an eyebrow.

"You're not carrying a grudge?" I laugh loudly, racking the plates to dry.

"I am." I say quietly. "But it's not something you act on, you know? We were never really friendly for the past few years, so it's not really a big difference." I silently note the unusually deep look in Kagami's eyes. The way he leans against the counter, and the way his brows furrow into a scowl. "I like it better here, anyway. It's not like I remember a ton from the States anyway."

"Who lets a sixth grader live in another country?" Kagami asks, staring at me in shock. I shrug.

"I stayed with a host family for a while. Kuroko's, actually. I got my own place the third year I was here." I reply. Kagami raises an eyebrow. "How else do you think I got used to him?" Kagami laughs loudly once more. "I guess they sent me here because they trusted I wouldn't do anything stupid. I did plan to go back, but I kept getting attached to living here, and I made too many friends, and I just got in too deep. I really just couldn't bring myself to go home."

A towel hits my head, startling me out of the daydream I was about to delve into. "Hm?" It's then that hands over the towel roughly start to rub it against my hair, to which I respond by yelping and trying to dodge the hands. I raise the edge of the towel and stare at Kagami in shock.

"You're going to get sick if you sleep with wet hair, idiot." He says. "Sit down and lemme dry it. You're obviously incapable of taking care of yourself." I make several starts at sentences to protest what he's said, but my sleepy mind doesn't form anything coherent. I sit down on the floor, in between Kagami's legs as he reclines against the sofa.

The hands that dry my hair are now much gentler as Kagami dries my hair as best he can with my formerly discarded towel. It no longer drips onto everything and is now just very, very damp. I vaguely wonder how dry he'll get it before he gives up or I fall asleep. I probably should've mentioned this to the dunce-like redhead, but I fall asleep when people play with my hair, especially around my scalp. I've always been that way, I guess, but only found out after Kuroko's mom played with my hair several times, each resulting in me sleeping within ten minutes.

"Kagami, I'm gonna fall asleep if you keep doing that." I say drowsily, slouching forward. Kagami makes no movement to stop, and no sound to indicate he's heard me. "Kagami, did ya hear? I'm gonna fall asleep..."

"Yeah, I heard." Kagami says nonchalantly. Since his legs are bent, I lean against his knee.

"I'm gonna sleep, Kagami." I groan, his kneecap pushing awkwardly into my cheekbone. "What'll you do then?" Kagami gives a noncommittal noise and keeps wicking the water out of my hair. "Mmm... do you think I could call you Taiga? Or would that be too personal?" Kagami just laughs behind me. "I'm not good at judging those things." I sound drunk, I think. Out of it. Maybe even a little crazy.

"You're actually going to fall asleep, aren't you?" Kagami replies fluidly. "I didn't think you were actually serious." I laugh a little, trying to wake myself up a bit more.

"Mm, yeah. Kuroko's mom didn't think I was serious, either." I answer. "I should probably drop by some time to check in with them." Without thinking, I lean back and use Kagami as a recliner of sorts. He tenses below me, suddenly stiff and remarkably less comfortable than Daiki. When he realizes I have no weird motives for him, Kagami relaxes. In this way, he's actually more comfortable than Daiki is. Although about the same size, Kagami has a warmer feel than Daiki and his more distant personality.

I do my best not to wriggle and squirm to find a slightly more comfortable position. I doubt it would make us friends if I started squirming around the bashful boy. "Mm, maybe I should start playing again." I mutter to the roof. "I kinda miss that game."

"What game?" Kagami asks. His even breathing makes my head rise and fall at the rate he's breathing. "Basketball?"

I shake my head. "Nah, I can play that with you and Daiki and any of the Miracles. I wanna plaaaay." Kagami moves slightly beneath me.

"What was that sport you talked about... the one for that scholarship?" I nod slightly.

"Yeah. I've been practicing and had live pitching and stuff, but it's been a while since I had a permanent team I practiced with. My old teammates are all playing for their schools, and the teams I play for aren't dynamic." I grumble, mostly to myself.

"Why didn't you play for your high school?" Kagami asks. I shrug slightly.

"Balancing two sports and school and work is a lot of stress. I barely managed it during middle school." I answer. "But it's not like I don't have a little more time now. I could probably squeeze it in somewhere." I can almost sense Kagami's frown before he speaks.

"Wouldn't you end up missing practice a lot?" I shrug.

"Coach and Satsuki don't want me practicing until Interhigh. It's not like they wanted me at practice before either. They just let Daiki and I do whatever we want. It isn't much fun." I say with irritation. "It wouldn't kill me to play again. I can always quit if it gets to be too much."  Kagami is silent behind me, one hand still somehow massaging my scalp. I feel liquid, like I'm melting like butter against him. I couldn't stand if I wanted to. 

"Is it something you like to play?" Kagami asks after a few minutes of silence. I shrug.

"I used to. I don't really feel anything when I practice." I reply carefully. "I don't know if I like it anymore. I don't  _dis_ like it." Somehow, my chest begins to feel empty, hollow. It's as if I don't have the heart to pick it up again, and disgust wells up in its place. "Maybe it's a bad idea." 

The next morning I walk into the Athletic Offices, searching among the small offices for the name plaque of the man I'm supposed to meet. I'm surprised at the unusual lack of female coaches, but there's nothing I can do about it. "Would you be Hai-chan?" A voice says smoothly behind me. I turn slightly. 

"Yes, that would be me." I reply fluidly, watching the man carefully. He's pretty young for a coach, with shaggy looking hair and calm eyes. I can see him assessing me somehow, as if he's calculating my worth. 

"My name's Watanabe Kousuke. I'm head coach for the softball team." My eyes narrow slightly and I face the taller man fully. 

"Nice to meet you." I say politely. "Momoi-san told me that you might be interested in having me play for Touou's team? I thought I might look into it." Watanabe gives me a small grin. 

"Really? That's great. I saw you play at Teiko. Would you still be interested in catching for us?" I blink in surprise. I thought he'd be more wary of me. Doesn't he know that I dictated everyone's movements? That I wasn't against playing rough with others? 

"U-Uh, if you'll have me, I guess. I'd need to talk this over a bit more with the basketball coach..." I answer as I scratch the back of my head bashfully. "I know it's kind of late to join another sport, so I apologize..." 

"Don't worry about it." Watanabe says kindly. "Tell me who your coach is, and we'll work things out over the weekend." With surprise, I tell him Coach's name, and he promises to get back to me later today. 

"See you!" I say, waving as I leave the room. I ended up emailing this guy last night after Momoi send me a text about him. He agreed to meet with me, something that kind of surprises me. "Thanks for your time!" 

"See you Monday!" Watanabe responds with a smile. I walk off school grounds with a smile itching to slice my face in two. I want to laugh, to giggle, to squeal and scream and dance with excitement. I don't have anything to do this weekend. Daiki and Satsuki are off in vacationland. Kuroko and Kagami will probably also have things to do today, and I don't want to infringe on them any more than I already have.

"What am I going to do with myself?" I grumble unhappily as I walk toward home. 

"Haicchi!" My body stiffens at the oncoming storm... no, the oncoming train wreck. "Haicchi~!" I almost topple forward at the bubbling boy beside me. 

"Kise? What're you doing here?" I ask with wide eyes. The blond winks at me playfully. 

"C'mon, Haicchi!" He grabs my hand and drags me quickly in the opposite direction. 

"Oi, Ryouta where do you think you're taking me?!" I exclaim with various amounts of terror. The blushing blond grins at me. 

"You'll see, Haicchi~!" 


	20. Chapter Twenty

I really wish I knew how it turned out this way. Kise's dragged me into a bland, yet somehow slightly adorable coffee shop to grab a drink. The brick interior holds pictures of people long gone and stories retold. "Haicchi, here you go."

The bubbly blond sits himself down with grace at the other side of the table, mirrored aviators shielding his eyes and probably part of his identity as he sips his equally hot drink. "Why did you call me out here, anyway?" I ask, tasting a blend of coffee and chocolate glide over my tongue. _At least this'll keep me awake._ Kise doesn't take off his shades, which makes it difficult to make eye contact or see what direction he's looking in.

"Is it bad to hang out with your old teammates once in a while-ssu?" Kise asks with an open, innocent expression. "I haven't seen you since I played Kurokocchi..." I glance away, embarrassed.

"I guess not...but we weren't exactly buddy-buddy at Teiko, Kise." I reply with a placid expression. Kise merely raises a shoulder in response, as if to say it couldn't be helped.

"That's true." Kise says with his hands resting beneath his chin. "But we aren't teammates anymore, so there's no reason for us to let something like that bother you. We don't even go to the same school anymore, Haicchi." My eyes narrow slightly as I begin to grow suspicious of the blonde's motives.

"It doesn't bother me." I reply cautiously. "Being on any team with you, or against you, hasn't bothered me at all." The blond runs a hand through his hair, looking more than a little distressed. "So what is it that you want from me? You wouldn't just pop up out of the blue just to have a drink with me." Kise sighs, a long, tired, exasperated sigh that almost leaves my ears ringing.

"Momoicchi said that Aominecchi has been acting strange-ssu." Kise says with a sigh. "And that _you're_ acting weird, too." I raise an eyebrow in response.

"Because Satsuki is so well aware of my every movement?" I reply mistrustfully. "Things like that aren't any of her business." Kise's body stiffens as if from shock as he removes his sunglasses and wipes them clean with a strange little clothe. His gold eyes look molten from this angle as he looks back up at me.

"Haicchi, Aominecchi's worried, too. Is everything okay at home?" I stiffen this time, pausing mid-sip to stare at the blond boy wide-eyed.

"Kise-kun, that isn't your business." I say frostily. "And there's no need for you to feel like it is." Kise's eyes narrow significantly.

"Aominecchi's dense enough to believe you when you have an expression like that-ssu." Kise says calmly. "But I know enough about acting to realize all you do is try to fool us-ssu." I look at Kise with narrowed eyes, a scowl attempting to draw my eyebrows closer.

I glance at my phone, willing it to ring, but find the screen black and blank as usual. "Kise, I don't recall asking for your opinion." I say more calmly. "If I have problems, those problems are my own." Kise frowns, an expression that doesn't really suit him.

"Kurokocchi said you'd say something like that." He replies with a sigh. "Look, Haicchi... I don't know what's going on, and I don't know if I can help you. But, I guess part of what I want to say is that you shouldn't handle things that bother you so deeply by yourself." I almost sigh again, but hold myself back. I don't want to rude, although that probably isn't why it's so easy to check the sigh back. Kise doesn't have a way with words, and he's a terrible flirt, but Kise shows sincerity and heart toward those he calls his friends, and I don't want to tread on that. I'm more than grateful for it.

"Is that all you need to say?" I ask calmly, drinking more of this bittersweet drink. "Honestly, Kise, things like this-"

"Just... hear me out-ssu." Kise says desperately. "Look, we all know you definitely didn't play basketball because you liked it. You played it because you wanted a challenge, like me, but also because it made someone angry. You played it because someone said you couldn't.

We also know, very well now, that the only person you ever take orders from is Akashicchi and sometimes Momoicchi, but you never listen to the rest of us all. Look, Haicchi... we're just trying to get you to understand that you shouldn't play if you don't want to, and that it... it's okay to trust us, you know? We've known you for what, three years-ssu? Almost four? It's okay to lean on us, you know... we aren't like... _them_ , okay?"

My body is stiff and cold and unmoving as a breeze gusts in through the open doors. I want to speak, but I'm afraid my voice will tremble. I'm unlucky, yes, but I'm not weak. "I understand what you're trying to tell me, Kise." I say after a few minutes. "Let me tell you this: I don't do anything I don't _want_ to do. I haven't regretted my decision to play basketball. Yes, maybe I started playing for all the wrong reasons, but... it was a good experience. I learned from it." After a few more breaths, I continue.

"I do know who you are and aren't like. I've always known. I've always been able to distinguish who is my friend, and who is not. It's not like I don't trust you guys... at least, I don't think that's it. I just don't want to be a burden, I guess. But if there's something bothering me, something serious, I _will_ tell someone, okay? I'm not so stupid as to take on something that'll completely overwhelm me." Kise shakes his head slightly.

"You always say stuff like that, but you never act on it, Haicchi! Whatever's bothering you now... you should share it! Aominecchi is worried, and you know how he is! Momoicchi is worried, too!" Kise's voice is a little louder than usual, stronger, and more forceful. I lean back from the table as he leans forward.

"I understand that, Kise. I'm worrying them, and I honestly don't mean to. There's nothing wro-"

"There is." Kise's gold eyes are bright and alive and intelligent and all knowing. "Even Akashicchi has realized it. He wants to order you to tell us everything since Momoicchi and Aominecchi have told him what they can without treading on your privacy, but we barely managed to negotiate for this." The golden-haired model leans closer as I shrink slightly into my chair. "It won't be like _that_. You know we'd never do that. Haicchi..."

I stare at the dark, steaming liquid, watching caution and mistrust flash across my reflection. I glance away before I attempt looking at my eyes. Looking to Kise once more, I steel my nerves and sigh. "I know, Kise..." I reply tiredly. "I know you guys would never do that to me." What am I referring to? It can wait. There's no need to rush this. "I just... don't really understand what I'm supposed to do."

"Do? Just tell us-ssu." Kise chirps in his usual way. I roll my eyes.

"That's not what I meant, Kise." I say more hesitantly. "I know what the problem is. I've accepted it. I don't know how to solve it, or what someone is supposed to do when something like this happens to them." Kise's eyes widen dramatically.

"It's a boy, right?" Kise's eyes warm and he looks mischievous. I shake my head after reading his face, disappointed when the expression fades to concern. "Then.... _them?"_ He guesses. I fidget in silence, hoping he'll take a hint and drop the subject altogether. When I look up again, Kise's eyes look flat and cold. His face is stiff, although I can't tell if he's angry or uncomfortable.

"U-Um, Kise, it's really no big deal... Sorry it bothered you-" Kise grabs my face with his hands before I can finish my sentence. "W-What are you doing?" My eyes widen as Kise comes a bit too close. "Kise?"

"You should've told us sooner, you idiot!" He says urgently. "You're seriously coming with me!" That's also how I became the first random person to be dragged kicking and screaming after a to-die-for model. Yes, you heard me. Kise's good looks aren't enough to make me follow him wherever he wants to go. I mentally make a list of all the possible ways I can cause the golden-haired teen to suffer.

It's really no use to fight against Kise's strong grip. After all the times he's dragged me around during middle school, I should really know better. Of course, I'm doomed to make the same mistakes over and over until I die. I stop struggling after a couple blocks and allow him to lead me. "Where are we going?" I ask wearily, narrowing my eyes. The blond glances back at me for a couple seconds.

"Hm? To meet up with the others, of course." He replies in a chipper tone of voice. "Originally I was just going to wheedle information out of you, but it won't work on something like this, you know-ssu?" I try my best not to glare at the model.

"So it's like that." I respond flatly. "I should've known." Kise laughs nervously.

"Anyway, I was really surprised when you called me by my first name. You haven't done that since... hm... For a while now-ssu." He says. I shake my head.

"I learned that it's kind of rude and way personal here. At home it's usually rude to call someone by just his or her last name. The culture difference threw me off." I say with a shrug. Kise laughs.

"I kinda missed it. You kinda made the team seem a little closer when you called us by our first names." I raise an eyebrow.

"Then do you _want_ me to call you Ryouta?" I ask cheekily, my lips curving into a nearly strained smile. Kise laughs loudly, grinning back at me as we turn a corner and walk into a diner of some sort. Kise finally lets go of my arm and allows it to drop back to my side. All appears normal here, save the intense, dark tension in one of the corners. My stomach drops into my shoes as I notice the rainbow already seated there. "I shoulda known." I mutter grumpily.

My hair stands out among the Miracles. While their hair all seems somehow unnatural in their various rainbow colors, mine is the most normal at a chestnut brown. Their eyes all match their hair, save Akashi's heterochromatic eyes, while mine don't. My eyes are actually blue. They're lighter than Daiki's, and darker than Kuroko's, but not by much.

Under Akashi's heavy gaze, I pull a seat alongside Kise and sit down stiffly. "Alex." He greets, nodding slightly. It took me a long time to actually get Akashi's respect. Back then, in middle school, it meant the world to me. All I'd ever wanted was to be acknowledged and respected. Now, although I'm happy to still have his respect, it doesn't mean as much as it used to.

"Akashi." I reply politely, doing my best to sound natural. "It's been a while, hasn't it?" Red and gold stare deep into my eyes, the weight of their gaze as heavy as ever. I remain straight, tall, and confident under it. Akashi's eyes soften every so slightly, a sign of his approval.

"It has." He says. "Do you know why all of us are here?" My eyes narrow.

"I'd assume it's because everyone was summoned. If you mean the reason behind that, I cannot say." I answer.

 _"I heard something's been bothering you."_ He says in near-perfect English.

 _"Well, you aren't wrong. Your English is as good as ever, Akashi."_ I respond.

"So Haichin has been acting strange lately, I heard." Murasakibara says in that lazy way of his. "And Minechin wouldn't share." I send a silent thank you to Daiki.

"Is that so?" I reply, laughing awkwardly.

"Yes." Kuroko responds. I glance over to him. "The same strange as back _then_." I stiffen in my seat, my muscles going rigid and my brain telling me to bolt before it's too late.

"I see." I say. "I'll have to correct that."

"Haicchi, we just want to know what's wrong-ssu." Kise says. I glance at him.

"My problems are my own. I'll handle them my own way." I reply firmly. "There's no need to worry."

"It's been three years. Why don't you just go home?" Akashi asks bluntly. I flinch.

"I...can't." I answer him carefully. "It isn't possible."

"You don't have any money-ssu?" Kise guesses.

"N-Not quite." I say, squirming slightly. "Money for a plane ticket isn't the issue at this point."

"You think they won't let you come home, nanodayo?" Midorima guesses.

"Ah, that's not quite it. It's fine, really!" I respond hastily, waving my hands around a little too much. "Just forget about it."

"Is it a problem with your passport?" I stiffen at Kuroko's words.

"Perhaps. I'm not sure I can use it anymore." I reply.

"Did it expire?"

"No."

"Then what's the problem with it?" Akashi asks. I fidget for another minute.

"There's an issue with my, um... my citizenship." I say quietly.

"What kind of issue-ssu?" Kise asks. I squirm. I should've gotten the hell out of here earlier, before all these questions appeared.

"It's been renounced, hasn't it?" Akashi asks. Somehow, his voice almost seems gentle. My head shoots up at his words. "And I'm sure you had some other wonderful news along with it?" I nod hesitantly.

"How did you know?" I ask quietly.

"You were disowned. " Midorima suddenly states. I stiffen once more.

"Haichin's parents are mean." Murasakibara says with boredom. I resist the urge to grind my teeth.

"You'll be deported if you're found out, Alex." Akashi says carefully.

"I know." I say with a grimace. "I don't know what to do." Silence falls over the table. I want to fill the void with laughter, but how am I supposed to do that when I can't even bring myself to smile?

Kise taps away at his phone for a while before showing me an article. There's a hopeful look on his face, one I admire. I read it hesitantly. It isn't anything new, and somehow reinforces my sense of helplessness. "Okay. But how am I supposed to do that, Kise? I'm still a minor."

Kise is silent for a long time. Long enough for Akashi to take the phone from me, read it, and pass it around. I wriggle in my seat uncomfortably. "Leave that to me." Akashi says after a few minutes. "You need that in name only." I stare at the redhead in shock.

"Akashi..." I don't know what to say. A simple thank you won't be enough to express my gratitude.

"Don't worry about it,” he says with a bored expression. Kise's phone is returned to him without issue.

"Hai-chan? What're you doing here?" a familiar voice asks. I turn in time for Mizuki, my favorite teammate, to grin and flounce toward me. She's wearing an apron and holding a notepad.

"You work here?" My voice holds an equal amount of surprise. "What a coincidence. I'm just talking with a few old teammates." Mizuki's eyes scan them nervously.

"They have a scary atmosphere." She whispers. I laugh.

"I'm sure." I reply. "You're playing for your school, right?" Mizuki nods.

"Yep! I have a question, Hai-chan..." Mizuki anxious twists a lock of dark hair. I tilt my head slightly.

"Go for it." I say, my eyes slanting in anticipation.

"Haruna is friends with this Touou outfielder and she mentioned that the team just got a new catcher, but nobody's met her yet." I recline in the chair and watch Mizuki carefully.

"Is that so?" I ask, a smirk playing at the corners of my mouth. "How interesting."

"Is it you? Hai-chan, are you really going to play again?" The desperate notes in her voice make me wonder if she's happy or sad.

"And if I am?" I ask, my eyes narrowing slightly.

"Well, I'm happy, but I don't want to play against you..." She says. I laugh.

"Ah, neither do I. You're my favorite pitcher, after all. Playing against you would be rather cruel." _For you, anyway_. Mizuki shift awkwardly from foot to foot.

"Ah, yeah." She says, eyes downcast. Regret and pity pool in my stomach.

"I saw your game last week." I say, watching carefully as her eyes widen and brighten. "You're improved quite a bit. I'm impressed." She looks happy now. "You have a lot of tells. Make sure you work with your catcher on that." An embarrassed blush rises to her cheeks. "Other than that, your pitches looked beautiful. When you play me, I hope you throw me plenty of them. Especially that drop."

"B-But you can't hit a drop!" Mizuki exclaims. I grin widely and begin to smirk.

"I thought you knew me better, Mizuki. I can hit a drop." Wide, surprised eyes. "I can hit anything I want to hit." Dark eyes watching as another girl, this one taller and slightly wider, appears beside her. I note the bruises around her ankles and sigh. "Is this your new catcher?" Mizuki nods.

"Is she bothering you, Mizuki?" The girl asks. Mizuki shakes her head.

"Tomoe-chan, this is Hai-chan, my previous catcher." Mizuki says.

"That one everyone called a demon?"

"Hey, hey, you might hurt my feelings if you say that to my face." I say teasingly. "Alex Heights." I hold my hand out for a handshake.

"Makoto Tomoe." She says, staring at my hand like its a piece of god knows what. I hide my irritation and retract my hand.

"Hai-chan isn't a demon, Tomoe-chan." Mizuki says. "She's the best catcher I've ever seen." My chest feels warm at Mizuki's praise, but I don't let it show.

"Anyway, I should get going." I say, rising. "I'll see you guys later, since it seems like I'm unwanted here." I actually frequent this place on weekends. It's one of my favorite places to be. "Tell Manager-san I said hello~!"

"Alex, I expect you to keep up." Akashi's statement isn't anything unexpected. I laugh and glance at him.

"Of course, Emperor."


	21. Chapter Twenty-One

My understanding of the universe is pretty basic. I don't believe in fate, but I do believe in everything working together to form a bigger picture. I don't care about the reason behind the sun crossing the sky, or that we're all made of little particles. I think it's more fun to leave some things as mysteries that need unraveling. That same reasoning applies to human logic, I suppose. I'm not interested in how someone did something, but I'm interested in _why_. I don't care if doing certain things is possible; I want to know how many other people are wishing for those things. That's why, although it's no surprise that Coach Harasawa and Coach Watanabe managed to work out my schedule completely, I'm still curious as to why they'd go so far for me.

"Whatcha holdin'?" Satsuki asks as I look at the printed calendar in my hands. I'm in the middle of transferring these dates onto my iPod so it can remind me when they come up, and I can post this in my planner or on my fridge.

"A schedule." I say, finishing the last two dates and putting my iPod away. "Did you want to look at it?" Satsuki shakes her head, her eyes closing as she smiles.

"Nope! If it's important, you can tell me about it later. I was just wondering what it was that made you finally smile for the first time in a month." I glance up at the pinkette in surprise.

"I have too smiled this month!" I reply vehemently. Satsuki shakes her head.

"Nope! This is the first smile I've seen out of you since-" _since my brother gave you that envelope?_ Satsuki's eyes seem tired.

"Don't tell me I worried you..." I say with a frown. Satsuki just offers me a smile. "Gee, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to. Everything's gonna work itself out, so don't stress." Satsuki laughs.

"I should be saying that to _you_." She replies pleasantly. "So why are you so happy?" I gnaw on my lip.

"Promise not to get angry?" I reply, glancing up at her hopefully. She nods. "I kinda checked out that softball coach you texted to me and I maybe talked with him and he possibly talked to Coach Harasawa whom then may have come up with a schedule so I might possibly play both softball and basketball." Satsuki's eyes are wide, pink, surprised. Then they return to normal.

"Was Akashi-kun okay with that?" She asks, tilting her head. I nod.

"Akashi just told me to keep up. I've done it before. I can balance school and work." Satsuki just smiles at me.

"Well, that's good." She replies. "What about... in middle school Akashi always got concerned when you had games because you'd get hurt so often. Can you cut down on those this time around?" I look up at the pinkette.

"For sure. It's not like I haven't played at all between middle school and now. I've improved a bit, ya know!" I say playfully, holding the schedule out to her. "Take a look. I should be there for every game." Satsuki laughs lightly before taking it from me and looking over it.

"Are you sure that you can actually balance work and school with this schedule? It looks a little brutal..." She replies. I scratch the back of my head and shrug.

"The coaches made it. I did tell them I have work after practice so I can't stay late, but if they think I can do this, I'll do it. I'm not one to disappoint." I reply cheekily. Satsuki just sighs and shakes her head.

"And if you've bitten off more than you can chew?" She asks with a single slender eyebrow raised. I shrug.

"Then I'll come out and say it." I reply flatly. "If I cannot do both sports, if I cannot balance school with work, sports with academics, I will choose one over the other." Satsuki frowns slightly. "I don't know what I'll decide, but I'll definitely think it through carefully."

"Yo, Alex!" Daiki says as he enters the classroom. "I dropped by your place and there was a weird cologne or something. You trying a new perfume or something?" I frown slightly.

"No." My eyes widen with realization. "Actually, Kagami was over for a bit when you were gone. It might've been his." Daiki frowns slightly.

"That dimwit was in ou- your apartment?" I do catch Daiki's rapid amendment.

"Just for a little while. I fell into a pool and he just walked home with me and made sure everything was okay." I feel kind of bad for twisting the truth, but one night doesn't mean anything. We both fell asleep in the living room, I woke up first, and Kagami was out the door by noon.

"You fell into a pool?" Daiki's eyes are wide, shocked, maybe even a little mortified. "What happened?" I try to think of a way to smudge the truth without lying.

"It was an accident. Someone bumped into me and there was a pool and water and I just sort of fell in." I reply.

"Bumped into you, or pushed you in?" Daiki asks, his eyes narrowed as he leans against my desk. I try my best not to shift awkwardly. I don't like to lie.

"They literally just ran into me, okay?" I answer a little too snappily. "It's done with, anyway. I got pulled out of the pool and everything's fine now." _Water rushing over me. Bubbles brushing my face. I can't see._ Daiki leans in a little too close and stares at me intensely. The blue of his eyes seems darker than usual today. Dark, and deep, and searching for answers I'm not giving.

"You need to learn to swim." Daiki says, standing and stretching before he takes his seat behind me. "Unless you enjoy having near-death experiences." I fidget in my seat before stretching out my legs before me.

"Yeah, I'm working on it." I say cheerlessly.

"So what's with the paper?" He asks, leaning forward to peer over my shoulder at it. "Softball? You're playing _that_ again?" I nod.

"Yeah. It's not like I'm dropping basketball or anything. I'm just going to do both." I reply. "Besides, the coach seems nice and I heard the players all have good attitudes, so what's to lose?" Daiki pulls a face.

"Ugh, that means one of us has to make sure you don't get yourself killed, like you almost did last year." He groans, leaning back once more as I turn in my seat to face him. I hide my irked expression.

"I'm more than capable of taking care of myself, Daiki. Nobody has to worry about it. A few bruises won't kill me, ya know. I'm not an amateur." I reply coolly, my eyes narrowed. Daiki gives me a most dubious glance before shrugging.

"Whatever. Do what you like." He replies. I hide an amused glance.

"I would have done it regardless of your opinion, you know." Blue eyes regard me with a calculating gaze.

"Yeah. I know." _I wonder if Kagami is actually willing to teach me?_  

Basketball activities pass in their usual blur. "Nice work today." I call as I head toward the gym doors.

"Hai-chan, you aren't changing clothes?" Satsuki asks as I shoulder my bag and tighten my shoes. I shake my head.

"Nah, I promised someone I'd help 'em out. Changing into a cute lil' skirt and blouse ain't gonna cut it for what I gotta do. I'll see you guys tomorrow." I'm about to bounce out when Imayoshi calls my name. I look to him in response.

"You and I need to talk after practice tomorrow, got it?" He calls, adjusting his glasses. I nod.

"Sure thing, Shouichi!" I reply. "I gotta bounce-"

"Hai-chan!" Satsuki says at what is probably top volume. "You can't do that anymore! You're in high school now!" I stare at her in surprise.

"What did I do?" I ask with confusion, hesitating as I open the door and get a faceful of frigid air.

"You can't just call people by their first names, Hai-chan!" I blink in surprise.

"But I call you and Daiki and the others by your first names." I reply with further hesitation. "It's normal to do that."

"We've been over this, Hai-chan." Satsuki says with a long-suffering sigh. "It might be normal at home for you, but here it's really personal! Plus the others and I are closer to you, so it's okay with them, but you still aren't particularly close with-"

"Satsuki, let me tell you something. Imayoshi took me to a doctor. Wakamatsu's carried me several times. Sakurai filled out my medical history form completely on his own. I can't think of many things more personal than that." I reply. "If they tell me they're uncomfortable with me calling them on a first-name basis, then I'll stop. Frankly, I don't particularly like the name 'Hai', but I use it because for some reason 'Heights' is ridiculously difficult for Japanese speakers. I don't even dream of anyone besides Daiki and Seijuurou calling me Alex."

"So, what did Alex do this time?" Daiki says as he enters the gym, a bored expression on his face as he leans against the doorframe.

"Aomine-kun!" Satsuki says urgently. "Hai-chan's going back to calling people by their first names again!" Daiki raises an eyebrow at me before shrugging.

"Okay." He replies. "So?" Satsuki nearly face-faults. I shift from foot to foot.

"I'm gonna be laaaate, Satsuki. Or would you prefer Momoi?" Satsuki gives me a rough sigh.

"Fine, fine. Go ahead and leave." I don't waste another minute before brushing past Daiki and telling him I'll probably get home a little late and then taking off. My phone buzzes awkwardly in my hand. _Yo, you ready? You don't have to do it if you don't want to. -Kagami_

 _I said I wanted to, didn't I? I can't back out now. -Hai_ The streets pass in a dizzying blur as I make my way through the usual throngs of people toward Maiji Burger, my so-called meeting spot. _Sorry if I'm late. Satsuki yelled at me for calling someone by their first name. -Hai_

 _You call people by their first name? -Kagami_ I narrowly dodge being run over by several groups of teenagers.

 _I suppose that now's not a good time to tell you I do, and that I pretty much call you Taiga in my head. -Hai_ I finally find myself under the giant Maiji Burger sigh, a little ways away from the door, as Kagami jogs toward me. "So you're sure?" He asks, tilting his head. I nod several times.

"As long as you don't push me in again." I say half-jokingly. Kagami offers me a grin.

"Sure. I won't push you in this time." He replies fluidly as I start walking to cut down on the distance a little more. "We're going to the same place." I nod a few times, stepping beside him and walking to match his pace. The walk to the pool is a silent one, where my stomach flutters anxiously and my palms begin to sweat.

The inside of the building is better lit this time around, and while I can just barely recognize the kanji on the door, I can't seem to pronounce it correctly. "In we go." Kagami says, pushing me through the door once I start to balk. I keep my mouth clamped shut so I don't say anything I'd otherwise regret, but I don't manage to keep myself moving forward. I stumble into the awaiting room. "Right." Kagami says, crossing his arms and staring at the intimidating pool of water. "You got a bathing suit on under that, or do you need to go change?" I glance away.

"I have it on under." I respond as I shift from foot to foot. Kagami nods before pulling off his shirt and jacket and leaving them tossed over his bag. I slip out of my basketball clothes and fold them neatly on my backpack. "So..."

"Let's just try walking in, okay?" Kagami says, noting the dubious way I glance at the water. "Just walk down the steps and try and get waist-deep. You don't need to go any further." I nod and begin to tiptoe my way into the pool.

The water seems as slimy and repulsive as always, gliding past me in a way that almost reminds me of snakes and other scaly creatures. The water is clear though. It distorts the way my feet look. It's also more than a little cold, and makes chills run up and down my arms as the water embraces my torso. I don't let my arms dip into the water. "See? It's not so bad." Kagami says as he sloshes in next to me. His rough movements cause a wave of water to splash against my upper back. Cool air makes me shiver.

"If you say so. " I mumble unhappily. Kagami grabs my arm and tugs me closer to the deep end.

"Let's go a little further." He says. The water rises to mid-chest, and my heart starts to race. I can still stand with my head well above the water, which I make myself believe is a good thing, but the slickness of the water is making my skin crawl. "Just a little more." The water is now up to my shoulders, and I try to lock myself in place.

"T-This is far enough." I say, my voice sounding more panicked than I'd like. "L-Let's just stop he-here." Red eyes stare at me intensely, their gaze narrowed as if guessing what thoughts are racing through my head. At least my body has adjusted to the temperature of the water. I don't feel cold anymore, but that doesn't really make the water any more pleasant than before. I push down the urge to extract myself from the pool.

"Okay." Kagami says gently. "This is far enough for now. I thought you'd stop earlier." I glance away from him and try to suppress the heat rising to my face.

"It's not like I didn't want to." I mutter. It feels strange, to be weightless in water. I can only seem to move in slow motion. My every movement is met with resistance on the water's behalf. "But I... don't want to go any deeper."

"Okay." Kagami says. "Before you learn to swim, you actually need to be comfortable being in water. Why don't you try ducking your head under? You can stand here, so it should be okay." I study the redhead's face, looking for any trace of doubt or any lack of confidence.

"S-Sure." I do try to bring myself to duck my head under water. I gnaw on my lower lip, staring down at my not-so-firmly placed feet, and try to work up the courage to dip below the surface. It doesn't work. It _really_ doesn't work. All that changes is that instead of me staring at the edge of the pool or Kagami, I'm now staring at the surface of the water and feeling repulsed by the idea of it covering my head, even momentarily. Five minutes seem to pass this way. "I can't." I say, refusing to look at the previously confident redhead. "I can't do it."

"You can." He responds. Kagami moves a little closer to me. "Try it." I shake my head. I can't do it, I don't want to. I don't want something that can actually kill me to keep me from breathing. I'm not willing to flirt with death this time around. "Watch." Kagami says. I turn my gaze on him and watch as I dip below the surface of the pool without so much as a second's hesitation. He stays there for a while, a few seconds, before coming back up and looking at me. Dark strands of hair cling to his forehead.

I bite my lip a little harder. "Kagami, I _can't_." I say quietly. "I can't make myself do it." Kagami examines my face.

"Do you trust me?" He asks suddenly, grabbing my face in his hands. My eyes go wide with surprise.

"W-What?" I ask, unable to move. My body tenses. The warmth of his hands feels wonderful against my skin, and the roughness of his hands somehow feels comforting.

"Do you trust me?" He asks. I nod. "Say it."

"I trust you." I whisper, startled by the intensity of his gaze.

"Again."

"I trust you." Kagami nods.

"Good. Now, you gotta trust me, okay? You're not going to like this." All I can focus on is the red of Kagami's eyes, the way they look so focused and determined and confident, but somehow underneath all I can see is a little bit of fear and a lot of confusion. The frown that pulls at his brow looks like one of concern. " _Trust me, okay? I won't let anything happen to you."_

"Okay." I whisper. " _Okay_." His face nears mine until his forehead rests against mine.

"Close your eyes." I do as I'm told, closing my eyes nervously as the water reaches higher and higher, stopping at my chin.

"Kagami..." I say nervously, wanting to pull away from him. "The water..."

"Keep your eyes closed, Alex." Kagami says. The heat of his skin spreads across my upper face. My breath shudders past my lips. "Just trust me." We slide down lower and lower, until the water is just below my nose and I can barely breathe. "Take a deep breath through your nose." I'll be obedient this time around, but only because I can't name anyone else who'd go to such lengths for me. I take the deepest breath possible.

Down, down we go, until the water is almost at the top of my head. Then, with just another inch, the water is over my head. For a moment, everything seems like it'll be okay. Then I start to think.


	22. Chapter Twenty-Two

For a moment, all I can feel is the touch of Kagami's skin, the way his hands are holding my face and the way his forehead seems to anchor me in place. The cold of the water seems to climb up my body, causing a shudder to run down my spine and cause me to grab Kagami's wrists like a lifeline. For a moment, I manage to ignore the slick substance that encases me from all angles. I keep my eyes closed. My hair brushes against my fingers. Then the realization that I'm underwater, unable to breathe, floods my senses.

The cool that surrounds me is off-putting, the weightlessness absurd, and the substance that could fill my lungs and end me terrifying. My grip on Kagami's wrists tightens, and I'm sure it's painful to him. I try to pull away as my lungs begin to burn and tears build behind my closed eyes. _Kagami, let me go up. I don't wanna be here anymore._ Kagami doesn't let me out of his grip, no matter how many times I try to pull his hands away from me. My lungs are burning, burning, burning, and I'm sure I'm going to drown here.

The redhead then shocks me. His lips brush against mine before he blows air into my lungs. Surprise makes me go rigid in his hands as I freeze. My body relaxes against my will, content with the oxygen it's been given for the time being. My panic hasn't diminished in the slightest, but it somehow seems a little more controllable. I don't feel like running and hiding. All I want is to get out of the pool. My grip on Kagami's wrists lessens ever so slightly. When I'm about to run out of air once more, and bubbles escape my lungs, Kagami gives me more air.

Not once does he allow me to pull myself out of the water. Logically, I understand what he's doing, but that doesn't mean I want to follow through with it. I tap his wrist once more, hoping he'll understand and let me out, but Kagami doesn't budge an inch. I get another lungful of air instead. My hands stray from his wrists and hold his hands instead, not pulling them away but keeping them in place. I guess if it's with him, I don't mind being like this, even if I hate it.

Then, after another eternity and two more breaths, Kagami lets me go. My head breaks the surface of the water without hesitation. Even though I've had more than enough air, I take a number of deep breaths and try to brush my hair out of my face so I can see properly. I'm on my own, standing here, without anything physical to keep me anchored in place. My previously contained panic breaks free. Somehow, despite the overwhelming sense of unease and imminent doom, I manage to stay in place, frozen, unmoving.

"Alex?" My eyes lock with Kagami's for just a moment. Before I'm even aware of my movements, my arms are wrapped around his neck and my face is buried into his shoulder. Shudders rip down my spine before I realize I'm blubbering nonsense in English and that half the words probably don't even exist. "I can't understand you." What is it that I'm trying to say? All I know is that I'm very happy to still be breathing. Kagami remains silent and still against me. My nonsense eventually trails into silence.

"Kagami." I breathe, feeling the warmth of his skin combat the coolness of mine. The redhead shifts slightly, his arms wrapping around my torso as I continue to clutch him tighter.

"What is it?" He asks. His voice sounds different somehow. I can't place the change, but it leaves my heart racing.

"I'm not dead." I murmur. "Not dead." One of Kagami's hands is now cradling the back of my head, while the other seems to keep me bound to him.

"That's right. You're fine." Kagami says gently. I nod into his shoulder. I don't feel like ever letting go. I just want to stay here, like this, forever.

"Thank you." I say quietly, watching the surface of the water as it reflects the overhead lights.

"Look at me." He says, moving his hand to the back of my neck. His thumb rubs small circles against it. I look at the redhead hesitantly, trying to read his expression. I can't identify it, and that somehow makes me anxious. "You did real well today, got it?"

I nod slightly, wondering where this is going as he reads my face. "Good." He says. "Can I try one more thing?" I'm sure even he can sense how my pulse nearly doubles, a feat that should be impossible. I still feel breathless, but I nod nonetheless.

"Okay." I say. "But only because it's you." Kagami gives me a wide grin.

"Perfect." I don't know how or why or when things got like this. I don't care how. I don't think about when. Why is a good question, but now irrelevant.

The only thing I can see is red. Red eyes watching me, red hair dripping water on my face. I can feel the water lapping at my shoulders as he moves us toward the edge of the pool. The way his hands feel rough against my neck and my waist. The sound of water is peaceful for once, and the chlorine smells subdued.

Out of all those things, however, just one matters. That which consumes me senses the most is not the feel of water or the sound of my ragged breathing. It isn't the sight of glazed red or the way Kagami's shampoo smells.

It's the taste of his lips as they press against mine. The uncertainty that makes his hold on me a little tighter. The way his eyes are half-opened and starting to show something I don't think I've ever felt. The feel of his chest against mine, the edge of the pool rough against my back, the motions of his body, all seem to trap me. I have no way to explain it.

My mind goes blank. My arms tighten around his shoulders. My eyes close. Kagami's chest presses against mine every time I try to breathe. I wonder what he's thinking, and I wonder what he'll do. Then, as suddenly as this began, it ends as he pulls his lips away from mine. "Please, please, tell me you felt it, too." Kagami groans as his forehead presses against mine. "I can't have been the only one."

Red, red, consuming my vision and leaving the taste of chlorine and mint behind on my lips. "Alex?" My chest is rising and falling rapidly as I try to catch my breath. I watch the way Kagami's eyes widen, I feel the way his grip loosens, and I hear the way his breath hitches. "I'm sorr-"

Kagami doesn't get to finish. I press against his lips for another kiss, swallowing his apology. Hopefully, he can understand what I feel, what I'm trying to show him. His arms wind tighter as I grip his hair. He almost seems frozen, shocked by what I've done. Then Kagami is back, demanding and passionate and forceful, taking all I have to give until I have to breathe. My heart is just about ready to burst from my chest. My lungs still ache for air, but it's an ache I can ignore.

Kagami is silent against me. I don't know whether it's from shock or anger or irritation or surprise. I can't tell what's he's thinking. I'd ask, but embarrassment silences my tongue and makes my face redden. I don't think I can look Kagami in the eye without turning a hundred shades of crimson and tripping over my words. Now that it's silent and everything is still, I'm becoming more and more aware of the water around me and the way it feels against my skin. I place my forehead against Kagami's shoulder and hope that the contact will block out what I sense from the water.

"Let's get you out of the water." Kagami says after a few heartbeats. His hands drop to my waist and he lifts me as high as he dares to place me on the edge of the pool. The tiles feel cold against my skin, making shivers race up and down my arms for a few moments. Kagami pulls himself out directly afterward, sitting beside me. I pull my legs from the water and onto the floor beside me.

"The tiles are cold." I murmur, standing and walking over to grab a towel. "Want yours?" Kagami looks at me and shakes his head.

"Nah, I'll get it myself." He says, standing and rooting through his bag. I towel off, hoping it hides the red that still paints my cheeks. My practice clothes, which are thankfully all dark colors today, are pulled over my damp swimsuit. My hair is still dripping across my shoulders and onto my face, but there's nothing I can do about it, no matter how much I attempt to towel dry it. "Gimme."

My towel is snatched promptly from my hands. Kagami's hair-drying movements are superior to mine. Within a few minutes and me almost falling asleep, he manages to turn it from dripping to damp. "Thanks." I say, smiling up at the taller redhead. He just grins at me before grabbing his bag.

"It's getting a little late, so let's go home." He replies. I nod, grab my backpack, and follow him out the door. I thought things would be more awkward, to be honest, but I'm not complaining. I know things probably won't stay this way, so it's best to enjoy the non-awkward phase of things while it lasts. We're out into the street before I've even realized it.

The walk home is silent for the most part. Kagami has something on his mind judging by the way his hands are fidgeting and the sighs he sounds. I want to let him think, but it seems like he's overthinking whatever this is. "What's on your mind?" I ask, tilting my head sideways. Kagami glances at me.

"Can I ask you something?" He replies, stopping at the street corner. I stop and look at him. He actually looks kind of sick.

"Go for it." I reply. Kagami fidgets a bit more, rubbing imaginary dust from his jacket and adjusting his grip on his bag.

"Go out with me." He says suddenly. my eyes widen.

"Come again?" I reply, my brow furrowing. I don't think I heard that right.

"Go out with me, Alex." He repeats. I open my mouth to reply when he cuts me off. "I know you don't know me very much and I know this seems really sudden but... what ever _that_ was... I want more of it. We have chemistry. Go out with me, Alex." My face flushes, making me feel warm against the crisp air.

"I know that came out of know where, but-"

"Kagami." I halt the redhead in his tracks before he has a chance to somehow embarrass himself. "At least let me answer, ya know?" Kagami's cheeks darken.

"Ah. Yeah." He responds, scratching the back of his head. "So..." This time my cheeks darken once more. 

"Please let me think about it, okay?." I say. Kagami nods and offers me a smile.  

"Oi, Alex." Daiki smacks the back of my head with a mutilated eraser as the teacher dismisses us for the end of the day. Startled, I jump in my seat, slamming my knee into the underside of the desk. A yelp escapes my mouth.

"What, Daiki?" I ask, rubbing the offended knee with a pained expression. "Was it really necessary for you to hit me with that?" I toss the eraser back to him with a long-suffering sigh. Daiki merely huffs.

"You've been spacing out all day." He mutters. "You sick or something?" I shake my head.

"Have I? I guess I just can't concentrate today." I reply, stretching my arms. The blue-haired wonder raises an eyebrow at me.

"You can't concentrate." He repeats, sounding incredulous. I raise an eyebrow in return.

"It would appear so." I say, packing up my things. "Shou- Imayoshi wanted to talk with me after practice today. I wonder what it's about." Daiki shrugs noncommittally and shoulders his backpack. "Anyway, it probably isn't too serious. He didn't look angry or anything." Another shrug from the blue-haired wonder. I begin to question his intelligence for the umpteenth time. 

"You gonna be home late?" He asks as we walk out the door. I'm heading toward the gym, and he's probably only joining me so he can steal some food from poor Sakurai's bento. I give a shrug in response. 

"I dunno. Depends on how much Imayoshi feels like talking. I shouldn't be. I don't plan to make any stops on the way home." I reply easily, pushing through the gym doors. "You just reminded me that I still need to tell him about the schedule, so thanks." Daiki merely grunts in acknowledgement and moves to take the little remaining food of Sakurai's bento. The little sausage octopi are his favorite, I think.

Practice passes by in an uncomfortable blur. Daiki leaves five minutes in to avoid Satsuki, and I can't seem to give practicing my all. I guess I'm just kind of tired. "Hai-chan, that's the third time you let yourself get screened for so long!" Satsuki says suddenly, causing me to snap my attention to her. Surprised, I'm about to reply when the ball collides with my head.

"Ow..." I groan, rubbing my head. "Satsuki, it's dangerous to distract people like that! That could've been my face!" The pinkette simply huffs and rolls her eyes.

"Honestly, Hai-chan, what's with you today? Are you sick?" She asks. "Does your ankle hurt? Your ribs?" I shake my head.

"Sorry, Satsuki." I say sheepishly. "I haven't been able to concentrate on anything all day." Re-lacing my shoes, I glance up at her before shrugging once more. "It's that redhead's fault." I mutter darkly.

"What?" She chirps, peering down at me.

"Nothing." I say, smiling as innocently as possible. "Just thinking about what might be distracting me." Satsuki gives me a rather skeptical glance before sighing. 

"Okay, Hai-chan. Just try to concentrate a little more, okay?" I nod. 

"Of course." I say cheerily. "I'll do my best." My playing improves to normal levels as I distance myself from the events of last night. We scrimmage against each other for the next twenty minutes before Coach Harasawa calls for the end of club activities. 

I wipe the sweat from my face against the bottom of my ancient tee. My bag is half unzipped, and most of the guys are already changing, so I can just shrug on my jacket and go home if necessary. "Oh, Sho- Imayoshi! You wanted to talk to me, yeah?" Imayoshi nods as he walks closer to me. 

"Yeah. I heard about your decision to join softball, and wanted to talk to you about it." He says. "I saw the schedule, too. I don't think that sort of thing is actually humanly possible." I rub the back of my neck in irritation. 

"I think I can, and apparently so do the coaches." I reply calmly. "I'd like to give it a try." Imayoshi shrugs. 

"As long as you show up to games. If you need to take days off, find time to do it. We don't need you injured, and having you sick or unable to play or falling behind in school are all situations we'd rather avoid." He remarks. "Do you understand?" I nod.

"Of course." My retort is nothing short of lippy, but I dislike others underestimating me. I'm not as fragile as they think. I'll do almost anything to meet expectations. For certain scissor-wielding demons of destruction and terror and possibly my death, I'll go to any length. Since Akashi definitely expects me to stay on top of things, I have no choice but to do so. "I'll do my best. If I start slacking off, tell me and I'll work harder." Imayoshi merely raises an eyebrow. 

"Alright. Well, good luck with that." He reciprocates. I nod. 

"Yeah. Thanks." I return, packing up my back. I'm out the door, more or less presentable, in another five minutes. I wonder vaguely if there's any food left in my fridge, or if I'll have to order takeout once more this week. Daiki will probably call if there's nothing in the fridge and I need to get something. Otherwise he'll order takeout or make do with whatever we have. 

My phone buzzes. "Hello?" I answer, adjusting my bag so I can talk and carry it at the same time. 

" _Alex, is this you?"_ I don't recognize the voice on the other end. 

" _Who's speaking?"_ I ask, raising an eyebrow as I continue to walk. 

" _It's Janine. Mom wants to talk to you."_ I raise both my eyebrows. 

" _Sorry, Janine. I'm not permitted to talk to that woman. Technically, she's not my mom."_ It's true, and I know it probably stings. The talking to my parents thing is also true. After I got upset during a phone call and nearly punched the living crap out of Kise, Akashi forbade me from taking their phone calls. " _I'll listen to you, if you want, but only for two minutes. Then I'm hanging up."_

A sigh sounds through the phone, like I'm the root cause of many, many problems. " _She wants me to stay with you for a while, Alex. Is that okay with you?"_ Shock causes me to freeze as I walk into my living room. 

 _"I don't have space for you, Janine. It's a one bedroom place that I'm sharing with a classmate."_ I can almost hear the curiosity in Janine's next question. 

 _"Is it a boy?"_ I laugh. 

 _"What does it matter? I don't have a place for you to stay, Janine. Even if you wanted to come over, I'd need to talk it over. Besides, what makes you think you can stay here?"_ Janine is silent for a while. 

 _"I have something you need."_ I raise an eyebrow in curiosity once more. Daiki gives me a strange look as I shift my weight to one foot. 

 _"What's that?"_ Janine sighs. 

 _"Let me stay for a while, and I'll get you your birth certificate."_ My lips curl into a smile. 

 _"That so? I'm sure something can be arranged, in that case."_ Janine sighs quietly.

 _"Get back to me with your answer."_ I nod and hang up.

"What was that about?" Daiki asks, cocking his head to one side. I give him an appraising glance for a few moments. 

"Janine says that if she stays here a while, she can give me my birth certificate. I need that." I answer. The blue-haired wunderkind sighs. 

"Better call Akashi." He groans. "We all know how that'll go." I shrug. 

"It's worth a try." I dial the dangerous redhead's number. 

" _Akashi here_." 


	23. Chapter Twenty-Three

Ten minutes finds me on the way to Kyoto despite my aching wallet, and about three hours earns me a place walking up the steps to Akashi Seijuurou's residence. It's a nice house, all in all. I wish I had one like it. It's bigger than the one I left in the States. I press the intercom. "Who is this?" A voice asks rather unceremoniously. I scratch the back of my head.

"Ah, my name's Alex Heights. I'm here to see Se- Akashi-kun." I reply, stumbling over my words.

"Please wait a moment." I nod despite knowing that the disembodied voice probably can't see me and wait outside the walled yard. My weight shifts from foot to foot anxiously before the intercom releases a static-like noise that scares the living daylights out of me. "I'll let you in. Please wait a moment." The voice says as it speaks again.

I hear hurried footsteps before the rather foreboding door opens for me and slip inside. Beside me is a rather petite woman who likely works for the Akashis. "Sorry for the trouble." I say, wringing my hands together. "I know it's late." The woman looks at me silently before turning and leading me to the door.

"Akashi-kun is waiting in the living room." She says as I follow her in and walk down the hall. Akashi's living room is surprisingly normal. Two couches and a couple armchairs, some pictures of him and a couple who appear to be his parents. I can hear some people moving around upstairs.

"Alex." Akashi says as I enter the living room hesitantly. "I hope your trip was pleasant." Akashi really isn't much for small talk.

"Aside from my wallet screaming in agony, it was fine, thank you." I say, still miffed that Akashi demanded I come to Kyoto. "I hope you realize that I have school tomorrow..." Akashi studies me.

"Yes. I am aware. The school has been informed that you will not be attending tomorrow due to a family matter." I raise an eyebrow.

"I see." I reply. Akashi continues to study me.

"Sit." I do so, although my movements let my anxiety show. "Explain to me what your sister said."

It takes me five minutes to give him the gist of our conversation. Akashi listens silently, taking everything in without comment and waiting patiently for me to finish. Throughout the one-sided story, Akashi remains still, his eyes never leaving mine despite my nervous hand gestures and constant fidgeting. When I'm done, Akashi remains silent so long that I wonder if I've done something I need to apologize for. "I understand the situation now." Akashi says after a few minutes. "Your birth certificate is something that we need with you. It seems you'll have no choice but to house her." I grimace.

"Daiki is staying with me right now." I comment. "I won't have any place for her to stay. Two's plenty. Three will be very hard to fit..." Akashi raises an eyebrow.

"You will need to house her. Do you understand that, Alex? It isn't a suggestion. I am telling you that you must accept housing her in return for the certificate." I sigh roughly.

"I know." I mutter unhappily. "She... she wanted me to talk to my mother. Apparently she had something to say to me?"

"Did you speak with her?" Akashi's question is a dangerous one. Thankfully, this time the truth is the answer he's looking for.

"No. You told me not to, so I told Janine I would not be talking with my mother." I return, my hands clasped tightly in my lap. Akashi nods.

"Good." My chest feels lighter when I have Akashi's approval.

"Akashi-san..." Heterochromatic eyes look at me curiously. At Teiko, I always called everyone by their first name after joining the first string. Nobody seemed to mind, but Satsuki told me off about it once during the last practices, so I stopped.

"It's fine if you call the six of us by our first names, Alex. Nobody minded." Heat rises to my cheeks.

"I-I see." I reply. "In that case... Seijuurou, what should I do about the citizenship thing? I'm worried. What if the school finds out? Or the government? Sei, I'm _scared_." Red and gold, looking at me calmly.

"That's the second reason why I wanted you to come. My parents will be down shortly. Allow me to do all the explaining, to both you and them. They will have questions for you. Do your best to answer them. If you do not understand something, I will translate it." Ak- Seijuurou states with what seems like practiced ease. I nod, showing I'll accept and follow his orders.

Three pairs of footsteps sound from the stairs, two belonging to people with long strides, and a third to someone with short strides, possibly the woman who opened the door for me earlier. "Mother, Father," Seijuurou says calmly, "I would like you to meet Alex Heights, the person about whom I talked to you earlier."

The relatively average height couple are silent as I turn, stand, and bow to them. "Pleased to meet you." I say politely, glancing to Seijuurou for approval. His eyes state that I have met his expectations. I don't sit until his parents do. Sei's mother has bright locks of flame-colored hair and gold eyes. She's really a beautiful woman. His father is as handsome as his mother, with shorter red hair and red-orange eyes. Three pairs of fire-colored eyes watch me as I try not to fidget anxiously on the edge of my seat.

"I believe it would be best to discuss this fully with Alex present. Do you agree?" Sei says, turning to his parents.

"Yes." His father responds, looking at me carefully. Seijuurou's mother is silent a while longer before she stands, moves from the couch, and crouches in front of me. My eyes widen and I have to keep myself from leaning back. I resist the urge to run.

"Your name is Alex, right?" She asks. Her voice is gentle and sweet, unlike my own mother's. I nod my head. "How old are you, Alex?"

"S-Sixteen, ma'am." The pretty woman raises an eyebrow at my formality.

"Seijuurou, did you say something to scare her?" She asks with her eyebrow still raised curiously. Sei is silent.

"Sei didn't say anything." I tell her with notes of anxiety filling my voice. "I'm just bad with meeting new people." Gold eyes read me as intensely as they dare, and I do my best not to flinch and direct my gaze away.

"Don't be nervous. We're not going to hurt you, you know." Mrs. Akashi says pleasantly. I offer a nervous smile.

"My son seems to have explained the situation to us quite well earlier; however, I believe it would be best to hear it straight from you." Sei's father says as his wife sits beside me. I look at him calmly. "Please explain the situation as best you can." I nod and draw in a deep breath.

"It's really not that complicated a story, to be honest. Where would you like me to start?" I glance at Seijuurou this time, looking for approval to continue.

"Start at the beginning, before you came here." Sei orders. I clasp my hands together before nodding.

"Right." A sigh pushes through my nose before I continue. "I'm sure Sei's told you this, but I'm from the States. In what would be seventh grade, I qualified for a study abroad program that allowed students affiliated with my school to study at Teiko if they were proficient in Japanese. I was lucky that I could take the test, and even luckier that I actually passed.

"As soon as my results came back, my parents agreed to let me study in Japan for a year since I'd be staying with a host family and they felt I could take care of myself well enough. A month later, I began studying at Teiko. It took two months for me to adjust, and another couple weeks for the softball team to pick me up. My gear was shipped over here, and I took on odd jobs to make some spending money since my parents were more focused on my sister, Janine, who is three years younger than me, and my brother, Eric, who is two years younger than me.

"Maybe two months later, after I joined softball, I met Seijuurou. I joined basketball pretty quickly afterward. During that time, contact between my family and I became strained. The time difference and my constant club activities and jobs made it increasingly difficult for us to find time to talk to each other. We'd go weeks without sending emails, although I always responded as fast as possible.

"My second year at Teiko came around faster than we thought should be possible. We couldn't afford a ticket back for me, so my school and Teiko worked out something and I received a visa that allowed me to continue studying abroad. I got a scholarship, luckily. My parents were unhappy with my decision to stay. They thought I should be home since I'd spent my year abroad, but they also didn't do much when I asked for help. I guess they were scared that I wouldn't be their daughter anymore after I'd lived away from them for so long.

"My siblings began to forget things about me, like how I looked and spoke and acted. I became more like a cousin than a sister, and then I was considered more of a stranger. My parents stopped sending me updates. My friends no longer talked to me. I was lucky that I became friends, or at least teammates, with Seijuurou and the rest of the basketball players. It really helped." I take a deep breath, glancing at Sei. He nods for me to continue, a strange gleam in his eyes.

"It became very difficult for me to relate to things my family was going through. They were having trouble of some sort and wouldn't talk to me for months. I became increasingly estranged from them even though I made every effort to be available when they weren't busy so we could talk, so I could see how my brother and sister had changed.

"My sister no longer remembered me. I was just some far off relative living in another country. My brother became very angry at me, thinking I had run away from home and didn't want anything to do with anyone. Nobody believed a word I said. I stopped going out of my way to talk to them and became close with my host family. My third year at Teiko went by with two emails from my sister and a video call from my brother accusing me of running away and never planning to come home. My parents stopped trying to bring me home." My voice is starting to shake, and it disgusts me.

"I started to reply more and more slowly to anything that had to do with my family. My sister didn't want to talk, and my brother didn't want me home. I found out later that the four of them had visited Japan at least six times during my time at Teiko. They never once told me, even when they stayed within a few kilometers of me.

"I didn't hear from them again until two months ago, I think. My family was somehow in Japan again, despite never telling me anything. They found our old manager, Satsuki, and my brother gave her a message and an envelope to give to me." My eyes are burning, and I rub them furiously to stop the sensation. "My brother's message translates to 'You're never coming home.' I was really angry. He couldn't even say that to my face... he went out of his way to say it to someone who was completely uninvolved. The envelope had... I don't know how to say it... um..." I look to Seijuurou. "How do you say _disownment papers_ and a _notice of revoked citizenship_?" Sei translates the sentence for his parents.

"Afterward one of my friends called me for the first time in two years to tell me he was shocked and disgusted by my decision to abandon my right to be American, even though I had no say in the matter." My heart stutters anxiously. "Look, Mr. and Mrs. Akashi, I know you might not believe me. I know that this sounds far-fetched, but... as soon as the government and my school finds out that I'm no longer a citizen of the U.S. and that I've been disowned, they're either going to deport me to who knows where or they're going to put me into foster care. I don't know what to do, or who to tell, so I went to Sei." My face is an open book. It always has been, and it probably always will be. "I'm very sorry to disrupt your evening with something that probably doesn't concern you and has nothing to do with you, but... I'm really, really sorry. I'm at the end of my rope."

Seijuurou looks at me with approval. "You've done enough, Alex." He says kindly. "You've gotten much more fluent." I almost smile at the redhead's praise.

"Thank you, Seijuurou." I murmur. My eyes are still burning, but I do my best to rein my unruly emotions. I've always hated wearing my heart on my sleeve.

"There are two ways in which a minor can become a citizen." Sei's father says, crossing his arms. "The first is to have one of their parents become a citizen. Seeing as you technically have none-" I flinch forcefully at that. "-it will not work for you." I sigh, disappointment coating my tongue like bitter medicine. "The second method is more complicated. You've lived here four years, I'm sure your behavior has been fine, and you have an income of your own. Your lack of citizenship actually works to your advantage. It isn't impossible for you to be naturalized."

Seijuurou looks at his father in earnest, his concentration something fierce. "What can I do to become naturalized?"

"The problem actually lies with your age. You need to be twenty-one to be naturalized on your own. You will need to be adopted." I gnaw my lip anxiously.

"I see." I murmur, frowning at the floor. I nearly start when Sei's mother rubs small circles on my back. Unlike Sei's eyes, his mother's are gentler. His father's tend to be more calculating, but not in a bad way.

"This is what I wished to discuss more fully." Seijuurou states. "Technically, Alex needs to be adopted in name only. However, it will, I'm sure, require her birth certificate. That's where the problem lies." I stiffen slightly.

"My sister claims that she will send me my birth certificate if she can stay in my apartment." I say. "I don't know how sincere she was when she said it."

"Actually, it won't." Mrs. Akashi says. My eyes widen with surprise. "Because you've been both disowned and had your citizenship revoked-" My eyes sting and my heart slams against my ribs. "-your birth certificate will no longer be valid. It should actually be destroyed by now, which means that if you are adopted, a new one will be given to you." I frown slightly.

"I see. I think I understand so far." Sei and his parents talk more, but as soon as the words start to go over my head, Seijuurou and I both know I'm pretty much done for the evening. It's 10 at night, the trains have probably stopped, and Daiki will be left to fend for himself tomorrow. I don't recall much else from that night except falling asleep against Seijuurou's mom and many worried whispers that make me stir from the darkness that enclosed my consciousness.

When I wake, I don't recognize where I am. In my haziness, my heart starts to race and panic climbs up my throat until I have a strong running whimper escaping my lips. My hands cover my ears and my eyes shut tight. _"You can't run now! Don't you think it's a waste? You're going to lose all your talent with just a little pressure." Undeniable pain spreads through my ankle and my shoulder, my wrist and my knee._

 _"Stop it! I didn't do anything to you!" Laughter echoes in my ears._ The blanket around me seems suffocating, and my lungs want more and more air until I'm gasping for breath.

"Morn-" My knees are pressed against my chest and I can't seem to curl up tight enough. My head is starting to pound, and my joints ache painfully. "Alex?" I think Sei's mother is here.

"It hurts." I squeak, shuddering. "It _hurts_." I don't know when or how, but Seijuurou is next to me in a matter of seconds.

"Alex." I flinch away from him and try to escape from the sheets tangled around my legs. My body hits the floor with a painful thud and my head collides with the nightstand. A yelp flies past my lips despite the way I clench my jaw as tightly as possible. "Alex, look at me."

For a minute, for a few heartbeats, for several ragged breaths, I mistake the eyes unique to Seijuurou for the dark eyes of the one who terrified me in the past. Sei's eyes are light and fiery. Those eyes were dark and unfeeling. I freeze in place. "Alex, it's just me. Seijuurou. The one you thought you saw is not here anymore. We got rid of him, remember?" I want to cry. I want to apologize for mixing up Akashi with the only other player who'd ever scared me.

"I'm sorry." I say helplessly. "I'm sorry." Seijuurou looks at me with surprise hidden in his eyes as I sit up and pull myself out of what was probably a ridiculous daydream. "I'm so, so sorry. I know he isn't here. I know he's been gone a while. I don't know why I'm like this." I blubber apologies for as long as Seijuurou allows me before I start crying and tire myself out once more.

"Go back to sleep, Alex." He says quietly. "Who do you want to take you home?" I'm not sure if Sei hears me at all, but I pass along the name "Aomine" before falling asleep once more.


	24. Chapter Twenty-Four

Daiki is there when I wake up again, although I think it's unnecessary. "I'll call you when we have something more for you." Seijuurou says as Daiki practically lifts me out of bed. I struggle somewhat and ask to be put down. My request is instantly denied.

"Okay." I reply, resting my head on Daiki's shoulder. I guess I'm lucky that I'm getting a piggyback ride today. Normally I'd never get one. "Thanks a bunch, Sei." I get no response from the redhead other than a slightly curt nod and the door _not_ hitting me as we walk out. All in all, no injuries to be listed.

Daiki is unusually silent today. Silent and kind of nervous, it seems. "What happened?" He finally asks, refusing to let me down even when we arrive at the train station. I raise an eyebrow.

"I explained things to Seijuurou's parents. We were trying to think of a way to keep me in the country." I respond fluidly. Daiki hums in understanding. I can feel it through the side of his neck, where my cheek rests.

"Wanna tell me what's going on between you and Seirin's ace?" Daiki's tone of voice is dangerous. Very, _very_ dangerous.

"You mean Kagami? He's teaching me how to swim." I say.

"Isn't there _something else_ you'd like to tell me?" I frown.

"What do you mean?" I ask.

"He asked you out. He _kissed_ you." Daiki growls as we sit at the empty end of the train car.

"To be fair, I kinda kissed him, too." I reply sheepishly.

"Why?" Dark blue eyes that hide so much fury my insides feel like liquefying. I give the bluenette the evenest stare possible.

"I was... testing something." I say honestly. The blue-haired boy raises an eyebrow. "I wanted to see if I have any feelings for him."

Daiki is silent beside me, a frown marring his face. "So what did you decide?" I shake my head.

"I have feelings for someone else. I got whom they were directed to confused." I reply. The eyebrow rises higher. "What, you want to know who?"

"Obviously, you idiot." Daiki says roughly.

"Promise not to laugh?" I hope to God I'm not making a mistake. This can either go really well or very poorly. Daiki snorts and nods. "Well he's waaaay too tall and he's always asleep in class and constantly skips out on club activities. He acts scary and intimidating, but he's also very gentle and caring and sometimes even sweet. He can also be really stupid sometimes..." I scratch the back of my head. "I like him. Very much. He usually does the right thing and can put me back in line, but he's really relaxed and lazy at the same time."

"Huh." Daiki says with an unimpressed expression. "I'll probably hate him." I raise an eyebrow.

"You _are_ an idiot." I say as my face threatens to flush. "Daiki, lean forward." He looks like he's about to protest, but Touou's ace does as asked. "Don't move." He doesn't.

My heart races and my palms threaten to sweat. Hesitantly, I place my lips over Daiki's and kiss him quickly before pulling back. At least, I _try_ to pull back. Daiki grabs the back of my head and pulls to him once more. Daiki tastes like hunger and lust all rolled up into the sweetest candy possible, one I'd never share with anyone.

Kagami was right to say we have chemistry, but the sort of chemistry I have with him could never compare to my chemistry with Daiki. Daiki has always been there. Even when I started playing, Daiki would come up to me after practice and show me things Akashi and Kuroko could not or had not showed me. I'm not a visual learner, but after watching him and having him help me practice, I would eventually catch on. He was somehow there after every injury, after the calls from my family, after my coaches yelled at me.

He stayed after when Akashi tripled my training menu or made sure I could read my homework when Akashi just told me to study. I'm indebted to him, just as I am to Tetsuya and Seijuurou, but that can't be helped. Daiki has always been a constant, and while I wish he hadn't changed from that boy who loved to play with every ounce of his being, that boy isn't gone. Daiki is Daiki no matter how he changes. All he needs is motivation.

My hand goes up to grab his sleeve as Daiki's presence devours me. I will give and give until I have nothing left. I can't breathe, but I don't mind. All I taste is hunger and satisfaction. I almost feel like I can taste the thoughts running through his head. My heart feels like exploding, and my chest feels like it's a puddle of warmth. Daiki makes me melt in every way possible. A short, quiet noise escapes my throat before I remember where we are. My face flushes crimson before Daiki pulls away. I breathe hard to catch my breath. "Daiki..."

"You're an idiot." He says, pulling my head to rest against his chest. "Ya shoulda kissed _me_ first." My face heats up further, but I make no comment. I try to hide my flushed face in Daiki's shirt.

"Going to Kyoto and back is expensive." I groan. "I'll have to work overtime." Daiki snickers quietly above me. His fingers are tangled in my hair, but I don't mind, even though it irritates me when he accidentally jerks his hand away from my scalp.

"You better tell that red-haired dumbass you're not gonna date him." Daiki growls. He pushes the armrest up and practically tugs me into his lap. "You're mine now." My face turns red from embarrassment, and I'm very thankful that there's nobody in the third seat of our little row.

"Daiki, you're too loud." I mutter, leaning against him bashfully. Daiki makes a rumbling noise that I just barely recognize as his attempt at stifling his laughter. "I'll tell him as soon as we get back." Daiki rumbles once more, although this time it isn't laughter, but approval.

I fall asleep during the train ride even though I try my best not to. Daiki only bothers to wake me up after we get back to Tokyo. Yay, power nap. The air here seems hotter than the air of Kyoto to a point where I can't help but grumble unhappily. I dislike hot weather to an extreme. Cold weather is more my forte. My phone buzzes before I get a chance to complain to Daiki. "Hello?" The blue-haired wonder gives me a curious glance.

"Hai-chan! Did something happen?" I laugh sheepishly at Satsuki's concern.

"I was summoned by Seijuurou." I say, fanning myself against the humid weather. Admittedly, it isn't that hot, but I still dislike the temperature difference. "I ended up staying the night. Is there something you needed?" I hear muffled chatter at the other end of the line before she talks to me again.

"I'm going to find Tetsu-kun and Seirin to get some more data. Wanna come?" Surprised, my eyes widen almost comically.

"Sure..." I say, scratching my head. "I guess I wouldn't mind going with you." Satsuki giggles on the other end.

"Come up by school and we'll go together." She replies. I nod slowly before realizing she can't see me.

"Right. I'll be there soon. I think I'm fairly close already." I hang up and look to Daiki. "Satsuki's gonna go see Tetsuya, and I'm going with her. Wanna come along?" The wunderkind shakes his head.

"Got better things to do." I nod.

"Well, while I'm over there I might as well give Kagami my answer. Wanna meet up later?" Daiki looks a little awkward, glancing anywhere but at me, before he shrugs.

"Sure. I'm gonna go to the arcade, if ya wanna go there." I offer the prodigy a grin.

"Sure." I reply. "See ya later!" It takes me a few minutes to find my way, and another ten to get pretty close to school. Another five find me at the gate, and an additional two bring me to Satsuki.

"Ready to go?" She asks. Shorts and a jacket hide what I can barely recognize as a bathing suit.

"You look ready to swim there, Satsuki. Where exactly are we going?" The pinkette gives me a wide grin.

"To see Tetsu-kun, of course! They have a pool practice today." I try to hide the paling of my face before nodding.

"Of course." I reply, offering her a smile. "Let's get going, shall we?" We take the bus as close as it'll get us to a gym I don't recognize. The kanji has the name Aida somewhere in it, so I assume Seirin's manager is somehow connected to it. Probably an aunt or uncle. Maybe her parents, judging by the way she'd assessed me during my short-lived Seirin days.

"We're here~!" Satsuki squeals. "I bet Tetsu-kun looks cute in swim trunks." I do my best not to face palm and look at her in amusement.

"I bet that's the real reason you're here." I say teasingly. "You just want to see Tetsuya shirtless." Satsuki giggles and smacks my arm, yet surprisingly, doesn't really deny it. It doesn't take much time to actually get into the poolroom, although it does take a little more courage on my part than I'd like to admit. Hey, hey, at least I went in, right? Besides, it's not like I'm going to swim.

It's a nice pool, that's for sure. And the guys swimming in it? Not bad by my standards. What? I can look, can't I? They're near impossible to avoid. Satsuki bounces off to make her dramatic introductions while I trail behind lackadaisically, wishing I could just go home. I wanna sleep. I want Daiki to order me takeout. I'm about to make this known when a pleasant ball of fur barks at me. "Whoa, a dog!" I squeal, crouching down to pet it. Bright blue eyes remind me significantly of a certain shadow. Said shadow glances to me. "Hello, Hai-chan." Tetsuya says, nodding to me. I offer him a grin.

"Long time no see, Tetsuya!" I say with a grin. "You're looking well." He nods.

"I heard that you were summoned." The phrase leaves anyone listening, including a particular redhead, frowning in confusion.

"Ah, yeah. I got summoned. I just came back, actually." I confirm, offering a more tempered smile. The puppy whines before I scratch behind his ears gently. "This your dog?" Tetsuya shrugs.

"The team shares him, but he tends to stay with me most often." I nod several times before bopping the dog on the nose and standing.

Satsuki, of course, decides that it's the prime time to press up against Tetsuya, so I make my way closer to Kagami. I'm not exactly sure this is the ideal setting, but this needs to be done. "How're you doing, Kagami?" I ask. Kagami just sort of shrugs.

"Not too bad." I nod.

"I have my answer for you, if you'd like to hear it." Kagami nods and looks at me expectantly. "Sorry, but my answer is no. You were right when you said we have chemistry. I know it's there, but there's someone who I've been thinking of for a long time.

"I won't deny that you're a wonderful guy who I'd love to date, but this person has been with me through thick and thin. He's always looked after me, he's always been there for me, and I... We have a lot of chemistry together. We get along. We understand each other.

"I really like you, Kagami, but this person means the world to me." My face is more than slightly crimson. "I'd still like to be friends with you, if that's okay."

Kagami is silent for a while, mulling over my words I suspect. Then he grins. "I'm still your friend, but don't get me wrong, I have no intention of backing down." He says cheekily. "I'm taking you as soon as you're free." I have no idea how to respond to that.

Luckily, I'm saved from making a reply by Tetsuya's dog scaring the living crap out of me. Unluckily, in doing this, I fall into the pool. I wish I had time to scream before the water closes over me. I nearly swallow water before a loud crash sounds above me.

I can feel the bottom of the pool pressing against me as I try to push off it. Then a pair, no, two pairs of hands grab me and tug me to the surface. I gasp for air and grab whoever is on front of me tightly so I don't sink again.

My heart is racing faster than should ever be possible. "Idiot!" I can faintly hear Daiki's voice. "I told you not to go near pools! You shoulda told me there was one here!" Is he in front of me? Even here? In the pool?

I'm literally hauled out of the water and roughly toweled off. Dark blue staring at me, staring _into_ me. "Alex?" I don't know why I'm out of breath. My heart seems like it'll burst from my chest. "Alex..."

"Daiki?" I blink my eyes back into focus and stare at the bluenette with shock. "What are you doing here?" Daiki looks concerned. The cool air of the indoor pool causes me to shiver suddenly before I realize what's going on fully. The urge to scan everything around me is overwhelming and not easily controlled. I give in to the urge.

"Alex, look at me." I ignore the bluenette and scan the rest of the area around the lip of the pool, searching for puddles of water. "Alex." Daiki's being annoying, overusing my name like that. The biggest puddle is next to me, I guess. The rest seems safe, but the tiles don't look as safe as something rougher would. "Look at me, Alex."

"Knock it off, Daiki." I mutter, finding several more puddles. I can't tell what the people behind me are doing, but they seem to be caught up in their own problems. _I should pay him more attention._

" _Alex._ Look at me." Daiki's hands grab my face and turn my head toward him, limiting my view of the area around me. My eyes stray from his face. "No, at _me_. Look me in the eye, Alex. Look right at me." Hesitantly, I look back at Daiki and look him in the eye. Everything becomes blue. "Don't look away." I don't.

Being this close to Daiki makes my face heat up with a blush. His hands are warmer than my skin, and I note that he isn't dry himself. "Why are you wet?" I want to study the rest of him, to see if his clothes are as wet as his hair, but the blue-haired prodigy won't allow me to break eye contact. I can only assume that he somehow jumped into the pool, which explains his hair and why _two_ pairs of hands hauled me out of the water.

"You idiot." Daiki mutters, pushing my hair out of my face so it spikes awkwardly to the side instead. "Don't stand so close to the edge of the pool. You can't swim to save your life." I mutter something that attempts to waive his worries, but all it does is make him sigh.

"Sorry." I mumble. "The dog startled me and I reacted without thinking."

"Sorry about that." Tetsuya says, making his presence the focus of my attention. "Nigou does that sometimes." I grin at the short boy.

"It's fine. It's my fault for standing so close to the pool." I reply, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly. I stand after another minute, waving off the hand extended to me. "I should get home." Satsuki suddenly snatches my attention from the calm bluenette by pressing up against me to offer me a hug. My surprise must be evident.

"That was scary, Hai-chan!" The pinkette exclaims, her face pressed cheek to cheek with mine. "You fell in and _sunk_ like a rock!" I laugh from embarrassment.

"Sorry, Satsuki." I turn and bow to the brown-haired manager. "And sorry, Aida-san. It seems we interrupted your practice a bit too much. It was nice to see you, though, Kagami, Tetsuya. I hope we play each other soon." Satsuki grabs my hand to tug me toward the door while Daiki sheds his jacket and shoves me into it a little roughly. We make our way onto the street at a leisurely pace.

"I wanna go home." I say quietly, ignoring the stares I'm getting from the people passing by. I don't really blame them. I'm soaking wet, dripping water all over the pavement, as Daiki leads me home.

"Be patient." Daiki replies. Satsuki soon parts ways with us to head home. "You told him, right?" Dark blue glancing back at me with what appears to be concern. I nod my head.

"Yeah, right before I fell in." I answer. The breeze makes goose bumps rise along my limbs despite the warmth of Daiki's jacket. I study him more thoroughly. He must be absolutely freezing now that I have his jacket. Daiki's just as wet as I am. "Do you want your jacket back?" He shakes his head. "You look cold."

The bluenette fixes me with a steely gaze that softens after several heartbeats. "Keep it on. You'll catch a cold, you idiot." He mutters, pulling me closer to him. I try to share my warmth by pressing against his side. "We're almost there anyway." I hum in response. It would probably injure his pride if I gave the jacket back at this point, and it's cold at this point anyway, so I accept Daiki's selflessness. It's not like he's always this way anyway, so it's an unusual and not entirely unwanted change of pace. I hope we get home soon. 


	25. Chapter Twenty-Five

My personality is flexible. It always has been, and it probably always will be. My morals are not so easily bent, but I'm not going to say it's impossible. I've done my fair share of misdeeds, and I won't shy away from that. Among all the things I've done, all the things I'm not proud of, there is one that stands out above the rest, and it eats at me whenever I think about it. 

I have a lot of pride as a person. That's both a cultural thing and a personality trait. It may not come across quite as often as it does with people like Daiki and Seijuurou and Shintarou, but it's an integral part of how I function. I have limits. Part of the reason I'm stuck here is likely because I'm too proud to admit my wrongdoings and apologize to my family for not trying to communicate harder. Part of the reason I'm still here is because people like Tetsuya and Daiki and Ryouta and Satsuki all helped me keep it together before I had a chance to come completely undone. I am a proud person, and that's not something I can deny.

In all my years that I can remember, there's only been one person I haven't defied. Seijuurou has always seemed like something I cannot overcome. His word has always seemed final, and because he's always helped me when I've been desperate, I've allowed it to be final. This, however, must come to an end. I know that if I want to continue to be the person I'd like to be, I can't have a person who is the only authority in my life. The only one who should be making my decisions is I. The only one who can tell me what to do is I. This, however, is a problem. I depend on Sei when things are rougher than they should be, and that's a weakness I'll have to overcome. In order to grow, I must isolate myself from him. No, isolating myself isn't the answer. All I need to do is defy him. 

I'm not a person who is defiant to authoritative figures, but this needs doing. Not just for my sake, but for Sei's as well. He needs to know as well that I'm not someone who will bend to his will anymore. To do that, I'll have to release the flexibility of my personality once more. I'll have to return to the stubborn person I was before. I'm not looking forward to the consequences, but it's necessary. It has to be. 

That, at least, was what I thought up until this moment. Red and gold drilling holes into me once more as I stay standing on Touou's basketball court. "I won't let you play, even if it means injuring you." He says, eyes narrowed in fury as I cross my arms over my chest. Satsuki is somewhere behind me, with the rest of the team. I'm lucky I'm still standing. 

"I'll play, even if you do that." I say stubbornly, my knees locking to keep me from turning tail. I keep my back stiff and straight so I don't submit to the urge to bow and apologize. I bite my lip to keep it from quivering. "I'll play against Seirin, and that's final. You can't tell me what to do anymore, Seijuurou. I don't play for you. I play for Touou." I keep myself from naming anyone. If I do that, Sei could go after them. 

I can hear his scissors snipping open and closed even from here. My heart is racing. My lungs feel like they've been deprived of air. It's like I'm under water once more, or facing Hanamiya, or even worse, Haizaki. My hands curl into fists. "You like your teammates that much, huh? What if I take them from you?" He asks, eyes narrowing further. 

"I won't let you. You cannot touch my teammates, past or present." I return, finally flattening the quiver in my voice. "They are mine. Not yours." 

"This isn't like you, Alex. You know that this will have some serious consequences, don't you?"  _Run, run, run, run, run!_

"Yes." What am I even doing, defying this boy? This boy who pulled me from a coach who'd only used me like a toy.  "I'm not afraid of them. You can't tell me what to do forever, you know. I have my own life." Seijuurou only raises an eyebrow.

"Do you remember when you told me that you'd allow me three wishes that go against yours?" My eyes widen. "I do have one left, you know." 

Sei's first wish was that I quit softball. I did it willingly. I had no drive to play at that point. His second was my transfer from Seirin to Touou. I didn't know enough to go against it. He does have a third, and if he uses it here, things will turn ugly.

"I do remember. You're lucky I even allowed the second to happen." I hiss furiously. "I'm not a toy, Seijuurou. I do not break after the third. You cannot play that way." Red and gold glowering at me furiously, like blood and liquid metal. My personality is going to seriously suffer for doing this. 

"H-Hai-chan, I think it's best to do as he says." Satsuki says behind me. My body stiffens. 

"Satsuki, I do hope you realize that I'm going to lose my temper if you say anything more." I hiss, turning to glare at the pinkette. I turn back to Seijuurou in time for Daiki to walk in. 

"What's this?" He asks. "Akashi?" Seijuurou ignores him. 

"Don't think I don't know what's going on between you and Daiki." Seijuurou says. "It would be a shame if something happened to him." My hands curl into fists. 

"I won't allow you to." I say angrily. "I'm playing, and I won't let you stop me. You can't make my decisions for me anymore, Sei. I won't let you. I don't want to follow your orders anymore." What's that gleam in his eye? The way he's looking at me sends shivers down my spine. 

Seijuurou is not a bad guy. To be honest, I think he has a God-complex, but that doesn't really matter. "Is that so?" He asks, his voice sounding more dangerous than usual. I nod vehemently, my jaw clenched. My heart is going to beat straight out of my chest. I'm scared. I'm scared for Imayoshi and Sakurai, for Wakamatsu and Susa, for Daiki and Satsuki. I'm scared for Kagami and Tetsuya, for Shintarou and Atsushi and Ryouta. I'll accept my fate.

"It's hard to take you seriously when you look like you're about to do as I say, Alex." I'm sweating bullets here. I grit my teeth. "I'll forgive you if you apologize and promise not to defy me again."

"I don't  _care_." I say as loudly as I dare. "I'm not going to do as you say anymore. I've done it up until now because I've owed you so much, but this is coming to an end. We no longer attend the same school or play for the same team. You aren't my captain anymore, Seijuurou." There are many things I want to tell the dragon-like Sei, but not all of them will come out. 

"I've done as you said in the past. I quit softball because you asked me to, not because I didn't want to play. I forgot what teamwork was like after that. I wonder if that's what you were aiming for? I switched school because you asked me to, even though every cell in my body wanted to stay at Seirin. I never wanted to go to Touou. I wanted to play _with_ Tetsuya, not against him. I wanted to be able to experience teamwork again, and have fun when we won. Do you even know what victory feels like, Seijuurou? It's normal to you, but to me, it used to be something you celebrate with teammates, something that made you feel like dancing and singing and screaming your happiness out to everyone who'll listen. 

"I wonder what it feels like now, aside from just a fact, an occurrence, that happens when we play. I wanted to struggle. I wanted to feel competition once more, but you took that away from me, Seijuurou. Why did you do that to me? As grateful as I am to have met everyone on this team, to have been able to play with Daiki and to see Satsuki as my manager once more, I regret ever setting foot in this school. 

"I owe you plenty. I owe you respect and my thanks and lots of things that I'm not sure I know how to repay, but I'm trying to do my best here. I don't owe you obedience, Seijuurou. I don't owe you the right to order me around like a pet or a soldier. I'm not a toy. You have plenty of good advice, and you're usually correct, but you don't know what's best for me like I do. I'm telling you as someone who respects you greatly that I won't follow your orders anymore. I'm done." God, I want to run. I want to run and bow and apologize, but then all my words would be for nothing. 

I'm doing my best to stay in place, to stay tall and keep my head up and look Seijuurou in the eye. I can do this. "Maybe you have grown a little since we last met." He says. Acknowledgement from Sei? That's practically unheard of, with the current him and all. "You can even look me in the eye this time. I'll allow it. Your defiance is not excused. Your training menu should be tripled." 

"Sorry, but we don't work that way here." Imayoshi says flatly. "I'm in charge, not you. Hai's training menu will remain the same as always." I could actually cry. The last time I tried to defy Seijuurou, I had no one to back me up. I was alone, and later subservient. It took me a long time to get over that one. Is it really different this time around? 

"You can't really expect her to still let you order her around, Akashi." Daiki says suddenly. The brunt of Sei's gaze remains on me, although he spares a second to send the bluenette a frigid glare that would make a grown man run and hide. I don't think I can take much more of this sort of intensity. I'm bad at being yelled at, and I hate arguing. I promise myself that this is necessary. I breathe in deeply and soften the sigh that tries to press past my lips. 

"Seijuurou, I'd like to think of the two of us as friends; however, if you continue to order me around or if you'll disrespect me, I don't want to be around you. I don't think you're a bad person. Your thinking is generally correct and I have yet to see you lose a single shogi match, which I'm not sure is possible, but I won't let you dictate my future anymore. I'll allow you your third wish, but you cannot use it on anything that has to do with my teammates. I will play." Red and gold are drilling holes into me. 

"I see." He says after a few minutes. There's something in his gaze that I can't quite understand, but it doesn't look like anything bad. "Playing aside, there is one more thing to discuss." I raise an eyebrow. "Two, actually. Your sister should stay where she is. Having her stay with you will reap you no rewards. If anything, her request to stay with you should've made you suspicious." I was already thinking along those same lines, so this comes as no surprise. "Secondly, my parents wish to give you their answer. This weekend is fine." I nod, relief flooding my chest. It doesn't seem like I'll be the victim of a murder today.

Sei's voice is somehow less demanding, not that anyone else would really seem to notice. I suppose it's just me who would. "You should know that I'm always right. Playing against Seirin will not help you." I stretch my fingers slightly by my sides. 

"It might not help me, but I want to see what kind of team Seirin's become. Tetsu won't let me down." Seijuurou merely raises an eyebrow. 

"There are always consequences for actions like those." He states. "That match will not be enjoyable."  He then turns to walk out. I shudder slightly as he reaches the door. Seijuurou looks back at me once more. "You should take heed of this, though. Don't think that just because you've defied me once means you'll be able to another time. I'm not your enemy, Alex." The redhead then leaves calmly, silently, fluidly. My knees stop locking and buckle completely. 

"Alex!" I wave Daiki off as he crouches next to me. "Oi, don't just scare me like that." I try to crack a smile and laugh what's happened off, but even someone like me would never be able to do that. 

I've always prided myself on standing up after I've fallen down. It's a skill I think comes in handy, and it's important to my character as a person. Knowing I can get back up after falling down is what's spurred me forward all this time. Knowing hardship passes and there are better times ahead motivates me to roll out of bed every day, so I can work a little harder and go a little farther and get a little better. 

I want to think that I've gotten just a little closer to where I want to be. I want to think that life has gotten just a little easier. If I can stand up to Sei, then I can stand up to anyone. I'm not going to bend under his will any further than I already have. Things have gone far enough. Then a sudden realization hits me like a ton of bricks. I've quite literally just told my team that I never wanted to play for them, that I've never wanted to play with them. I've thrown all their kindness so far back into their faces, and I don't know what I can say to make up for that. I wonder anxiously if they're angry at me, but correct myself. 

If my team is angry, so be it. I wanted to be enrolled at Seirin, and that's simply how things are. Yes, there are times when I've regretted being here with every fiber of my being, but I've never once thought that these people were bad to play with. Yes, Imayoshi's personality is insufferable at times, and yes, Wakamatsu has no idea how to stop yelling. Yes, Daiki has attitude issues, and yes, Sakurai is too apologetic for his own good, and yes, maybe Susa doesn't talk to me all that much, but these people are all great to have as friends. Just having Imayoshi stand up for me after I said what I did astounds me. 

I stand up after another few minutes, stretching my arms and legs. "H-Hai-chan!" Satsuki throws herself at me, and I struggle to keep from being knocked over. My eyes are wide with surprise, probably wider than they've ever been before. 

"S-Satsuki? What's wrong? Did I do something?" Her arms are so tight around me that I can hardly breathe. 

"I'm really sorry!" She exclaims, squeezing me tightly. "I forgot about all that. I remembered last time and I didn't want you to see the same consequences." Pink hair keeps air from reaching my nose, but I choose not to comment on it. 

"Is that so?" I ask. "Next time have a little faith, okay? I'm not the same person I was from last time. I like to think I've grown a little, ya know." Satsuki laughs breathlessly in my ear as I coil my arms around her. "But thanks for worrying. It means a lot to me, ya know?" Eventually, Satsuki relinquishes me from her vice-like grip so I can actually breathe. 

"I'm sorry if I've offended any of you." I say, bowing to the Touou players. "But that's how I feel, and how I've felt. I won't apologize for saying any of it. I hope it doesn't make you see me any differently." Then I turn to Imayoshi and bow a little deeper. "And thank you for saying what you did." I right myself.  "Nobody's ever said something like that to Seijuurou when I've argued with him before. I... I really, really appreciate it." 

Imayoshi doesn't really say anything for a while. He just watches me, like I've presented him with an interesting opportunity. "What kind of captain would let another captain tell them how to run their team?" He replies at long last. "I don't have any intention of letting someone that short and cocky tell me how to train my teammates, especially one who just barges in and intimidates one of my _kohais_." 

I raise an eyebrow at the comment, but I don't attempt reprimanding him for belittling me to his  _kohai_ , which is  _technically_ correct. "Still... thank you." I say, offering him a smile. "I'm grateful." A rather large hand grabs the top of my head and ruffles my hair rather violently. 

"Stop thanking people already, Alex." Daiki growls. "It's really not like you." I try swatting his hand away between my breathless laughter, but it doesn't do much good. 

"Daiki, are you just jealous 'cause I saved you for last?" The bluenette doesn't answer, instead opting to jab my side and make me squeal in surprise. I continue to dodge his hands and grin at him. "Seriously though, thanks, Daiki." I'm about to bow when the bluenette flicks my forehead, surprising me. I rub the offended spot gingerly and pout at the taller boy. "That was  _mean_ , Daiki. I was saying thanks and you hit my forehead? I'm offended!" Daiki rolls his eyes. 

"You shouldn't thank people for being decent human beings, you idiot." He mutters, ruffling my hair once more. I stick my tongue out at him. 

"Where Sei's concerned, it takes more than a decent human being to do something like what you guys did." I mutter. Daiki merely rolls his eyes.


	26. Chapter Twenty-Six

There are a few things that surpass the comfort of my futon. One is Tetsuya's bed, which is fluffy and wonderful and warm (I promise I found that out by accident and not by being a complete weirdo). Another is the hugs that Ryouta and Atsushi gave me on a daily basis. But that which surpasses all of those is what I'm experiencing now. The tall, grumpy, ill-mannered Daiki provides all the comfort I need.

My head rests against his chest as I sit between his legs, reclining against him as the TV prattles on and on about a new drama. I wonder if Daiki can feel the way my heartbeat is steady and unafraid. I wonder if he knows that I can tell his pulse is just a little faster than normal. Daiki rests his chin on the top of my head and wraps his arms around me. I make a noise of contentment, relaxing the tension that keeps me alert.

We have unexpected rain today, and it roars against the windowpanes, screaming across my balcony. I'm just glad to be inside. Twenty minutes ago Daiki and I stumbled through the door, dripping all across my floors. I'm still half-soaked, trying to suppress the shivers that race down my spine. "Go take a bath." Daiki mutters as I burrow into him more thoroughly. I make a dying animal noise that hopefully voices my displeasure in all ways possible. "Take it," He groans as I cling to him. "or I'll go in and take one _with_ you."

I groan loudly. "Daiki, you're so mean to me." It takes me a long while to shuffle to the bedroom, stripping off my socks and my jacket and half my shirt before grabbing my sleepwear and a towel.

"Your shirt is see-through, Alex!" Daiki calls as I waltz into the bathroom.

"Thanks for mentioning it earlier, Daiki!" I hiss through the door, irritation threatening to make me snap at him. I don't like moving when I'm cold. I'd rather just curl up against him and steal his body heat, but that's apparently not an option.

The water of the shower is nothing short of scalding as it washes over my head. It's good like this, I think. It brings a sense of warmth flowing back into my veins. The air seems increasingly cool around me. As I towel off, the mirror only offers me a blurred mixture of colors instead of my reflections. I look down hesitantly as I towel off, mainly to dry my legs, but notice the four short lines that are very pink and very bold. I wince visibly before slipping into my sleepwear.

"Daiki, you can shower now and stuff." I say as I open the door, a cloud of steam exploding into the hall in my wake. Daiki merely raises an eyebrow, staring at me and my steam in what I'll pretend is wonder.

"How could you even breathe with that much steam?" He asks as I wrap the towel around my hair and slump into the sofa. I shrug.

"I didn't really notice it." I say sheepishly. Daiki vanishes into the bathroom with some clothes and _hopefully_ a towel before I turn the TV on again. Channel surfing is not one of my strong points, but boredom drives me to pursue it. My stomach rumbles, so I try to decide whether to cook or order takeout. The latter seems much more promising, and much faster, so I order takeout and write a note to myself as a reminder to apologize to my boss for all my missed days of work since joining basketball. 

 

Today I'm not at basketball practice. This is one of my many future softball-days, and being introduced to so many new people with new names that I haven't entirely memorized is a little stressful. Coach Wantanabe is much more relaxed than my previous coach, and he actually teaches and gives feedback, instead of screaming at me. 

My throw downs aren't quite as good as they used to be, but there isn't much to improve. After a few throws, I'm back in the swing of things, watching how my new teammates interact with each other. They all seem friendly and sweet, like Mizuki and Haruna and Kagome were. Thankfully, they're also very much relaxed. Not in a bad way, mind you. Teiko girls tended to play because they wanted to say they did or because they wanted to win. Touou girls still want to win, it's probably what holds this team together in some ways, but they also know how to joke around and have fun. I haven't been a part of a team like this in a few years. 

"Hai-chan! Is it okay if I call you that?" This pitcher is sweet. Sweet and gentle, but tough as nails. 

"Sure." I supply, shrugging casually as I slap on my chest protector. I'm not hoping for a starting position. I'm just hoping for a chance to play. I trust this coach not to overwork me, especially since Coach Harasawa isn't cutting me any slack. Oh well. It can't really be helped either way. "Sorry, I can't remember names well. Would you remind me of yours?" 

"My name's Hayashi Honoka." She says. Hayashi's a pretty girl, that's for sure. I'm almost jealous. I almost call her by her first name as she grins at me, but manage to keep my mouth shut. Practice seems especially easy, but I guess that's because nobody's trying to drive their teammates out of their positions. I can only hope that the previous catcher won't be angry with me for using her position. 

I'll be the first to admit that these girls have exceeded my expectations. They're all talented from what I can see, and they work together well. "Hai-chan, you're up." Coach Wantanabe says, motioning to the machine. I shed my gear, grab my helmet, gloves, and bat, and move to measure up at the plate so I can take batting practice. 

If this coach knows anything about me, he'll realize that I can, and will, place hit on demand. I'm almost certain he knows, especially since he merely points in a direction and feeds me the ball. I adjust my swing accordingly. 

The ball will always go where I want it. Whether it's hitting, throwing, pitching, or fielding, I can dictate the movements of where it'll go with miniscule adjustments. It's something that I learned at Teiko, after working my ass off for several summers. My predictions of where hits will go are fairly accurate. I don't hit for long, just long enough for Wantanabe to get a good idea of my skill level, before I return to catching, and later, moving around to other positions. 

Catching is my primary position. It has been for several years, and I wouldn't give anything to change that. Reality says, however, that I am a utility player. I've played every position, and I like to think I've mastered each one. I don't have the height for first, but I can catch, and I can jump, and I can stretch. Third base makes use of my arm fairly well. Outfield as well. 

Practice goes on for another hour or so before Coach calls it a day and we're left to clean up the field. "Hai-chan, come over here, will you?" He calls as I help pack up team gear. I nod and jog over, watching and reading his expression carefully. The last thing I need is to piss him off, especially since this team seems like one I could fully enjoy. "What did you think of practice?" 

I raise an eyebrow in confusion. "I'm not sure I understand your question." I say in return, my eyes slightly narrowed. "Could you rephrase it?" 

"Sure." Coach replies, laughing slightly. "How was your first practice?" My eyes seem a little wide for this question. Nobody's asked me that in three years. 

"It was fun." As they tumble from my mouth, the words seem shy but confident. "I'm glad I could come." He offers me a smile in return. 

"Good." I'm not sure what he was looking for, but it seems he's found it. I go back to helping pick up gear and clearing the field with the others. My gear goes in the shed with everyone else's, something that almost surprises me. 

"Hai-chaaan!" A familiar voice comes blaring from across the field, followed swiftly by a resounding, "Satsuki, stay off the damn field!" Hayashi raises an eyebrow at me, glancing at the no doubt infamous duo that lies in wait for me. With everything away, I'm free to change and meet up with the blue- and pink-haired duo. 

"Daiki? Satsuki? What're ya doin' here?" I ask, coming closer to the fence so we can talk at a normal conversational level. 

"I wanted to see how you were doing!" The pinkette chirps, her hands grabbing the fence. "You're done, right? Daiki wouldn't stop comp-" 

"Shut up, Satsuki." Daiki growls, squeezing the top of her head gently. I raise an eyebrow but make no comment. 

"Yeah, we're done. I'll change and be out in a couple minutes." It takes me around five minutes to change back into my uniform and meet the arguing pair out in front of the lockers. "He causing you trouble, Satsuki?" I say teasingly. 

Satsuki giggles and waves me over. "Ne, ne, Akashi-kun wanted to talk to you." She says cheerfully. "He didn't sound as scary as usual." Either something real good is about to happen, or I'm about to get murdered. Probably the latter. 

I dial Sei's number reluctantly, walking with the two club members out of school and down to the nearest convenience store so I can stock up on snacks for the next week or two and escape the nighttime air. "Akashi." Sei's voice is calm, like always, but not intimidating. I raise an eyebrow. 

"It's Alex. I heard you wanted to speak with me..." 

"Yes." He says calmly. "It's been a while since you had that game with Kirisaki Daiichi." I nod slightly. 

"Yes. A while now." I confirm, paying for my snacks and thanking the cashier. "Did you have a question?" 

"I want you to tell me what happened with Hanamiya Makoto." My body tenses. I hold onto my bag more tightly. "After the Haizaki incident, I won't let this one slide." My eyes narrow at the sentence. 

"I don't want to talk about it." I reply icily. "And I didn't need a reminder of that time."  _Dark eyes dark eyes dark eyes._

"What happened with Hanamiya Makoto, Alex?" Sei's always been unusually persistent in these sorts of things. "You ended up in the hospital again. We're not letting this slide. I couldn't get anything out of Satsuki and Daiki because nobody but you was there." I bite back a venomous reply and glare hatefully at a man who won't stop staring at Satsuki. 

"I don't want to discuss this, Seijuurou. It's done, it's over, and it won't happen again." Daiki's giving me a strange look, like I've said something completely out of character. I give him a rather sour expression in return before turning my attention back to where I'm walking. 

" _Alex. It is important that I know."_ Sei's English startles me, as it always does. " _This will not slide. I will find out the truth whether you like it or not."_ I grit my teeth furiously and try my best not to think of various ways to kill the short redhead. 

 _"I said I don't want to talk about it, Seijuurou. You should respect that."_ Ah, my boss is going to kill me. According to my schedule, I'll be late for my first shift this weekend. I'll have to call and tell her tomorrow morning, or after school. Whenever I have time should be fine. It isn't Friday quite yet, so hopefully she won't be mad as long as I tell her ahead of time. Sei growls into the phone. 

" _I won't say a word to anyone else."_ By 'anyone else', Sei mainly means the rest of his beloved Miracles. My teeth are probably grinding audibly by now. 

 _"I will tell it once, and I will never tell it to you again after that. Is that clear, Sei? This isn't something I want to remember."_ I hear a noise of approval on the other end, followed by the rustling of paper and a popping noise. If I'm not mistaken, it seems like Sei's about to take notes. 

"Begin." Sei commands, clearing his throat slightly. I sigh loudly. 

"Yeah, fine." I mutter. " _We'd just played Kirisaki Daiichi-"_ I accidentally catch Daiki's attention. " _-and all throughout the game he'd been kind of violent. He even had me triple screened for at least a full quarter. Daiki wasn't there, so of course he wouldn't be able to tell you anything. Almost all my teammates got injured or hit several times throughout the game._

_"In the end we won, but that was only after Satsuki and I changed our playing strategy so I was doing mostly offense with limited defense and screening. Hanamiya and one of his teammates both fell on me on two different occasions, one of which was responsible for my ankle._

_"After the game was when that incident happened. I'd called Daiki 'cuz I was getting ready to head home. He wasn't here yet when Hanamiya knocked my phone from my hand. I don't know if he heard anything I'd said, or if Daiki could hear what was going on over the phone, but Hanamiya was really... he was pissed._

_"He blamed me for his team losing, and he said he'd make certain players trash by 'breaking' them. I don't know how it started, but all I know is that something, probably his fist, hit my stomach, and I was doubled over. Somehow I ended up on the ground and he just kept kicking me over and over again until Daiki came rushing in and I think the team came out when they heard the weird noises. We went to the nurse, and then the hospital, and that's the long and the short of it."_  We cross the street carefully. 

"Thank you." Sei says. I hear scratching noises from the other end. "Did the doctor ask you if you wanted to press charges?" I raise an eyebrow. 

"I was pretty out of it." I say, scratching my head as I try to think back. "I can't recall him asking, but then again I wouldn't really know. What would I do that for?" 

"Assault. Plus it could compensate your school for the bills they paid. You're lucky they covered that." I nod. 

"I know. It's not a bad idea, but I don't want to see him again." Sei must have a strange look on his face. 

"This won't slide. I think it's best to do this." I nearly run into a guy on a bike, who barely dodges me. 

"Can we continue this another time? I almost got run over by a bike. I'll think about it." To be honest, I'm not against pressing charges. That brat deserves to be punished for what he did, but I have other things to think about first. 

"Hai-chan!" Satsuki chirps, holding me half a popsicle. "Want some?" I laugh slightly. 

"Sure, Satsuki." I reply with a smile, taking my half of the cherry-flavored ice. "You really like cherry, don't you?" She nods enthusiastically, almost completely absorbed in what must be a flooding of her favorite flavor. 

The air has grown chilled, but it isn't ridiculously cold. Uncomfortable? Maybe a little, but tolerable. It probably doesn't help that my jacket's at home and my skirt is a little short. It would be better if there weren't any breeze, but the slight gusts that blow through fan warmer air across my face. It isn't unwelcome. 

Of course, deciding to succumb to the temptation of a popsicle wasn't in my best interests. My lips feel frozen after a while and I can no longer feel my tongue. I'm half afraid that if I talk, I'll bite off my tongue and won't notice. The fear is unwarranted, but it exists nonetheless. Soon all I'm left with is the popsicle stick, which I'm about to toss into the trash when Satsuki stops me. "Wait, wait, check the back! Maybe you've won something!" I raise an eyebrow as she speaks.

Although I'm half tempted to humor her, I'm positive that there's nothing on it, and even if I did win, we're too far from the store for me to be willing to go back and get anything. "What did yours say?" I ask, trying to delay the inevitable. Satsuki will get what she wants sooner or later, so I might was well attempt to prolong the time until she does.

The pinkette gives me a look of surprise before offering me her popsicle stick in her open palm. I take it from her, hoping I'm not touching the part that was actually in her mouth. Flipping the thing over doesn't offer me any clues, so I check the part beneath my hand. "There's nothing on this one." I say in surprise, my eyes widening slightly while I feign innocence. The pinkette rolls her eyes at me comically. 

"Of course not, Hai-chan!" Satsuki says. "You have the other half! It'll only be on one half or the other, not both, ya know!" I offer her a grin and polish off the other segment of the popsicle stick. 

"Of course, Satsuki. How could I forget?" Daiki rolls his eyes beside me. He knows I just don't wanna share the status of our popsicle with the pinkette. 

"Just finish your damn popsicle before I take it from you." Daiki says, whacking the back of my head none too gently. I let out an indignant yelp before glaring at him. 

"Rude." I shoot back. "Don't hit girls, Daiki." The bluenette rolls his eyes again. With the popsicle finished, I place it in my palm, letters up. In black ink, the status of our popsicle is glaringly obvious.  **Loser.**


	27. Chapter Twenty-Seven

Sei's parents are not what I imagined them to be. I mean as people, ya know? I though they'd be far more intimidating than Sei himself, so I'm left wondering how he got to be the way he is. "We have the paperwork done, so all you need to do is sign." Mr. Akashi says, pushing formal looking paper toward me. "We've filed a suit with your government for a new birth certificate." I nod.

"Do I need to do anything else?" I ask, signing after carefully reading the paper over. Sei shakes his head as his parents confirm that things are almost all completely settled.

My hands feel clumsy as soon as I pull them back. "I don't know how to thank you." I say after another minute. "I don't know if there are any words I can use that will show you how grateful I am. Even if I were to say it in English, there are no words strong enough." I stand straight and bow as low as I can. "Thank you, very, very much. I'm incredibly grateful."

All is silent before I upright myself. The look on the Akashis' faces is incredible, really. It's as if they've never seen someone bow so low, although I'm sure they probably have. "Hai..." Mrs. Akashi looks completely stunned.

Bowing as low as I did is, admittedly, rare. Westerners aren't exactly famed for their bowing, either. I suppose it doesn't help that I have a lot of pride as a person, and so my bows are sparsely given.

"You better call me Mom now, got it?" The tall redheaded woman says as she smothers me in a hug so tight I find it hard to breathe. My body stiffens with shock, and I don't know what to do with myself.

"Y-Yes." I say with surprise. After a few moments, I raise my arms to hug her back loosely. My arms eventually hold her tighter. I wonder if she knows that all my emotions are playing across my face, even though her shoulders hide them from view.

When I'm allowed to pull away, my face is much more calm and collected. I'm about to address both Sei and his father when my phone bursts to life. It surprises me so much that I nearly jump straight out of my skin. At a nod from Sei, I open it and answer. "Hello?"

" _Alex_." It's been a while since this sort of anger has been directed toward me. " _You ignored our earlier calls_?" My face drains of blood.

 _"Who is this_?" My pulse is racing. My knees are starting to feel like Jell-O.

" _I thought I told you that your sister would be staying with you_." My mother, huh? " _Give me your address_." I try to calm my heart.

" _I don't want to. I'm not going to tell you_." Seijuurou looks like he's finally figured things out. " _I don't want to talk to you anymore_."

" _Don't hang up on me_!" Her voice shrieks so loudly that I'm sure even Sei's parents could hear it. " _I know you're living with a boy! I know you're probably sleeping with him. You are, aren't you? I didn't raise you to be like this! You damn_ -" Sei plucks the phone from my hand.

" _I don't think you have permission to speak to Alex that way_." Seijuurou's voice sends shivers down my spine as I watch him, half concerned, half afraid. " _After all, she's no longer your daughter_."

I can hear her voice screaming something, half of them swears, before Sei closes the phone. "You need a new number."

"I'm sorry." I say somewhat lamely. "I didn't realize she had my number. I don't remember giving it to her."

"She's very eloquent, isn't she?" I do my best not to flinch at the statement. "Why are you so different from her?" I pause a moment.

"My dad's a very gentle person. I think I'm more like him. He never really talked much." I frown. "But staying with Tetsuya and his family probably shaped how I am." I grin. "His parents are nice, like yours."

After a few moments I shake my head and sigh quietly. "My mother is... different from how she was." Silence permeates throughout the room for a few moments before a heavy hand lands on my head.

"Listen now. That is your mother." Another hand points to Sei's mom. "That is your brother." A finger points to Seijuurou. "And I am now your father. Understood?"

I wonder if he can see how surprised I am. I wonder if he sees how much speech like that means to me, and how he's made my insides feel warmer than they have in years. "Yes." I say after another heartbeat. "I understand."

"Say 'yes, father.'" Mr. Akashi says. He says it gently, though. Like my own dad would've.

"Yes, father."  

My apartment seems a little brighter when I get home. Daiki sits across the couch, sleep, with the TV blaring and all the lights on. "Daiki..." I call over the sound of tinny laughter.

He doesn't make much of a response, other than to groan and squirm slightly. I turn off a couple lights after slipping off my shoes and shedding my jacket. It takes me another minute to find the remote so I can lower the volume.

"Daiki." I say softly. "Don't sleep on the couch."

The blue-haired wonder groans and opens his eyes lazily. "You're back, Alex." I nod.

"Yep. I'm home." I say with a grin. "You shouldn't sleep on the couch. You'll get stiff."

"C'mere." Daiki extends an arm toward me and gives me a beckoning motion with his fingers. I drop my backpack and move toward him.

When I'm within arms reach, he grabs me by the wrist and tugs forward, sending me flying. I land rather unceremoniously on top of the lounging teen. I wonder if he can see how surprised I am. Heat rises to my cheeks.

"Daiki?" My voice sounds more surprised than I actually am. Cool air brushes past my skin from the open window.

"Be quiet." Daiki groans. His hand comes up and presses my face against his chest. My body feels like it's on fire. At least Daiki is comfortable. More comfortable than my futon and the couch combined.

"Daiki?" The boy shushes me. His hand rests on my head, occasionally stroking my head or playing with strands of my unruly hair.

"Just stay like this." He mutters. I hum in response. Even though this is comfortable, I'll have to get up eventually so I can eat. My stomach is empty and incredibly hungry.

I squirm a little, trying to find a more comfortable position. Daiki groans unhappily, shifting beneath me as I move up closer to the back of the couch, and higher up his chest.

The bluenette groans slightly when I accidentally grind against him. "Sorry." I murmur, kissing the underside of his jaw. "I didn't mean to bother you."

"Idiot." Daiki growls. Within a few moments, I'm trapped between Daiki and the couch, his arms on either side of my head.

"Daiki?" My voice sounds breathy, like I've lost the ability to retain air. Dark blue is staring into me intensely. I almost forget to breathe. The boy makes a strange noise above me, almost a growling noise, which sounds like music to my ears.

I don't know how it starts, but I can't seem to find my breath. Daiki is demanding and aggressive as he kisses me, but I don't mind. My body feels alight and alert as heat floods me. My hands are busy gripping the bluenette's short hair.

Daiki's hands are everywhere and nowhere it seems. They rarely stay in one place, but they never stray where they're unwanted. I want to pull him closer, so I do. "Daiki..." His name slips from my lips without my consent.

The wunderkind leaves my lips for my jaw, and then my neck. I make a slightly strangled noise as he reaches the underside of my jaw. Daiki makes a noise of what almost sounds like approval before nipping at the skin and moving down further.

I can't help but gasp when he reaches my collarbone, or moan when he goes just below my jaw. " _Daiki_..." I tug at his hair as he bites down on the crook of my neck. Daiki hums, and I wonder thoughtlessly if he's drawn blood.

Daiki then kisses the spot more gently and bites down on it again. What's he aiming at? It feels kind of uncomfortable and almost painful, but it doesn't bother me much. "Mine." Daiki growls. I pull the bluenette back up to my lips. "Mine." He says once more. 

I make a noise of affirmation. "Yours." I murmur. Daiki's hair is soft and slippery between my fingers. It's almost sort of strange, how although Daiki leaves his weight on my legs, he's careful not to crush me. He's more thoughtful than I give him credit for. "Dai-"

The door slams open suddenly, giving me a heart attack. My heart is hammering against my chest. Keeping a hand on my chest to keep me down and out of sight, Daiki raises his head above the arm of the couch to glare at the person who's bothered to enter without knocking. "What are you doing here?" He growls. I'm more then curious as to who is at the door, but it might be better not to ask. 

"Wow, I knew you two were close, but I didn't think it was like  _that_." My face darkens with embarrassment. 

"What  _are_ you doing here?" I ask, wincing as my voice almost rises an octave. 

"English test tomorrow." I groan and hide my face with my hands. 

"You couldn't call? Or even tell me earlier?" 

"Weeeellll...." 

"Alex, I think you should know the whole first string is here." Susa says flatly. I can't see him, but I wonder if he knows my face is a million shades of red right now. 

"Right. First string. In my apartment. For no reason." My brain isn't functioning properly right now. "There's no way that all four of you have an English test tomorrow." 

It takes me ten minutes to pull myself together. My face is still a little flushed when I come back from chastising myself on the balcony, but my shirt and hair are more properly placed. "Tell me what you want to work on." I say with a dissatisfied groan. Honestly, have they never heard of knocking? Or calling ahead of time? 

"Listening." Imayoshi gives me a sheet of paper with the dialogue written in slightly messy handwriting, but it's nothing that I can't read. 

"Fine." I answer. "Get out a paper or something. I'll read it as soon as you're ready." When I have the okay, I start reading. " _Mike and Sarah are going to the mall today. Mike is nervous. He hasn't seen Sarah in four years, but he's also excited. Sarah is taller than she was four years ago. Her hair is shorter, above her shoulders. Her face is longer, and she seems thinner than she used to be._

 _"Mike hasn't changed much. He's very tall now, much taller than Sarah, but he looks the same. Mike's hair is a little darker, and a little longer. He's not as thin as he used to be."_ I glance up at the duo that scrawls their answers rapidly. "Would you like me to repeat the dialogue?" Imayoshi shakes his head, although Susa nods. I read it one more time at a normal speaking speed. 

"Do this part." Susa says, pointing to the bottom part. 

"You two are  _so_ buying me food for doing this." I say with a groan. "Rejoinder, Lesson Fourteen, part B. Speaker One:  _'Kelly, how far is it from here to Los Angeles by car?'_

Speaker Two: _"a. You have a car?'; b. 'I can drive you there!'; c. 'You should go by plane.'; d. 'About four hours.'"_ I look up at the third-years. "Do you need me to repeat anything?" They shake their heads, and we move on along down the sheet. I'm asked to correct grammar, pronunciation, and sentence structure for the next hour. Wakamatsu and Sakurai watch some NBA game that's on the TV. 

"I'm telling you Susa, if you don't put  _quickly_  before or after  _ran_ in this sentence, it makes less sense!" I say after ten minutes of arguing with him. "He quickly ran, or he ran quickly both make sense, but 'he ran after quickly the thief.' makes no sense! You can say 'he ran after the thief quickly.' though, if you really wanted to." 

Susa sighs and rereads the sentence before moving the placement of "quickly." I sigh with frustration, running a hand through my hair and blowing my bangs out of my eyes. "How much more do you two have?" Imayoshi glances over his work. 

"I'm done. Susa?" Susa nods in agreement, leaving me with relief flooding my veins.  _They can finally leave._ "As payment, I'll ask my mom for an extra bento for you. How's that?" I give Imayoshi a suspicious look. 

"Yeah, that'll do. Thanks." I say in response. Even if the four-eyed sadist did get me sick, it would be bad for the team, too. He isn't the sort of person to do something to his teammates. Not intentionally, anyway. After a half an hour, though, my teammates haven't left yet, and Daiki seems a little agitated. 

"Yo, if you guys aren't gonna feed us, we're gonna have 'ta ask you to leave." I say, a yawn tugging at me. 

"I gotta get going anyway." Wakamatsu says. "Sakurai, you live near me, right? Let's go together." 

"Sure!" Sakurai supplies. Both boys say their goodbyes, with Susa following close behind. Imayoshi lingers at the door. 

"Look, I understand how it is between boys and girls and you two," He says, tugging on his shoes and picking up his bag, "and I'm warning you as your captain that while I'm not going to interfere or tell you what to do, I don't want whatever you guys have going affecting how you play. Keep any of your issues off the court. Am I understood?" 

Daiki gives a huff of annoyance while I offer a gentler smile. "Yeah, we get it." I reply. "The only thing that's important on the court is basketball." Imayoshi gives us a nod and slips out, closing the door and saying good night. I'm locking the door when I sense Daiki behind me. 

"Aomine Daiki, what do you think you're doing?" I ask with an eyebrow raised as I turn around. The bluenette looks intense once more. "I'm hungry. Have you eaten already?" Daiki rolls his eyes and moves out of my way. "That's not really an answer, ya know." 

I heat up leftovers from a couple nights ago. Gyouza is wonderful no matter how often I have it. Dumplings in general are a serious weakness of mine, along with any sort of grilled meat, noodles, and pizza. Being the generous person I am (not) I offer Daiki some. He just picks up the dumplings from my plate, leaving me pouting. I eat and send him an unamused glance. "Did ya do anything today?" I ask. 

"Got some food. A few drinks. They're in the fridge. Why were you out so late?" I'm still stunned that Daiki had the ability to put things in the fridge instead of leaving them on the counter like he usually does. 

"I was in Kyoto. Sei summoned me again, so I met with his parents and stuff. We're sorting everything out." I say. "But I think I might be able to become a citizen soon, so I'm excited." Daiki looks surprised, even happy. He allows me a few minutes to eat without stealing more of my food. 

"That's good." He says pleasantly. I nod and give him a grin. 

"I won't get kicked out of the country, so I'm pretty happy." I try not to let my smile melt at the next sentence. "My mom called though. It wasn't... good." Daiki raises an eyebrow once more. 

"She sounded really angry. I don't know what I did wrong." I say. My appetite is suddenly lost as I stare at the half-eaten plate. "I did everything I could, ya know? I did everything she said and I never talked back and all I got was swearing and yelling in return. What did I do wrong, Daiki?" 

Daiki is chewing almost thoughtfully. It surprises me that he's taking this seriously. "It's not your fault, ya know? Not everyone's meant to have kids." He says finally. "Don't get down on yourself, idiot." His hand reaches over to muss my hair roughly. I blink at him in shock, unable to react to his statement properly. 

Another piece of gyouza makes its way into my mouth as I chew thoughtlessly, wondering if the problem is she or I. I can't really tell at this point. I've been gone so long that I don't really know what she's like anymore. I know she's angrier, older, and likes me far less than she did initially, but that's the gist of all I know. "Stop worrying, you idiot." Daiki says suddenly, stuffing three gyouza into my mouth in rapid succession. I can only blink in surprise and try not to choke at the overstuffing of my mouth. 

It takes me a while longer to chew, swallow, and breathe, before I shove the remaining gyouza into Daiki's mouth until he makes a noise and ducks away from me. "You look dumber than I do!" I say teasingly. "Don't talk with your mouth full!" I add as he makes a muffled sentence. I've angered the demon, and it shows. Daiki sprays me with water, I throw an empty can at him, and it all escalates until I'm somehow covered in suds and soy sauce, and Daiki looks like he had a trashcan dumped on him. 

Not a bad day, all in all. 


	28. Chapter Twenty-Eight

_My chest aches as I slip from the locker room, unnoticed as always. Shintarou promised to make sure my stuff doesn't get moved, but he'll probably forget. Seijuurou is more likely to keep track of my belongings. I'm half ashamed of relying on these kids, these near-strangers, but it's not something I can help. I'm required to meet someone right now, and it doesn't help that I can't let the others know, even though I want their advice. "I thought I was going to have to drag you out." A voice calls icily as I round the corner of the hallway, searching for the exit. My body stiffens against my will._

_"Haizaki." I say frostily. "What do you want with me?" I do my best to keep my face calm and collected, like always, but Haizaki has terrified me since he wouldn't take my "no" for a no. The feel of his hands on my skin still sends shudders down my spine and makes me itch to bathe myself in bleach._

_"Quit the basketball team." He says flatly. "You can't play. I won't let you. You and that blond kid- neither of you should play! I'm going to get my spot back!" My pulse is racing._

_"I refuse. I want to play." I don't see what's used to push the air from my lungs, but I suddenly can't breathe. The hand around my throat is getting tighter and tighter, and my ankle is bending in ways it shouldn't be. "St--"_

_"Shhh. Everything will stop in a few minutes." My nails lacerate my throat as I try to pry his hand away. My ankle is nothing but pain, and my knee is threatening to collapse in ways unnatural. My scream is lodged in my throat, unable to escape. The sudden flair of agony from my ankle confirms that it's been broken. "Stop moving, you stupid-"_

_"Oi! What do you think you're doing?" A voice calls. Daiki? My mind is hazy and I can't see anymore. Warmth trickles down from my neck, and my skin burns where my nails have clawed._

_"Hai-chan!" What are they doing here? They'll just get hurt! I can't breathe, I can't think, I can't feel. Everything is starting to slip when the purple-type giant picks up the ashen-haired teen like a doll. I can hear something snipping in the background, and two pairs of hands helping me to my feet, even though I know they won't hold me._

_"Haicchi, is this where you went off to-ssu? You should've said something!" If only the blond knew why I was here._

_"Ryouta, Shintarou, Tetsuya, take Alex back to the locker room. Daiki, Atsushi, and I will take care of this one." Sei's voice is as frigid and commanding as his personality allows. Two red eyes assess my blank and somewhat stunned expression. I wonder why everything is starting to feel cold. "Ryouta, call an ambulance."_

_I'm being carried and it hurts and I still can't breathe, but I know enough to realize that Teiko is somehow protecting me, and that this is dangerous for them. I try to cough up a warning, but my throat won't make any noise._

_I can't see anything after a while. I just want to doze off and go home and ask my parents what's for dinner. Unfortunately, none of that works out for me. When I next see things, I'm sitting in a hospital bed, wondering where I am and how I got here. The heart monitor goes crazy as I try to escape the clutches of the IV, but needles and blood have never been things I've handled all that well._

_"Look at me, Alex." Red eyes. Yes, I see red eyes that won't let everything slip away from me. "You're fine. You're in the hospital. In a few minutes, the nurse is going to come in, probably with the doctor. You need to calm down. Do you understand?" I nod. "If I had known you were going to see that... person, I would not have let you leave. Why didn't you say anything?"_

_"Couldn't." I croak. "Didn't want teammates to get hurt." Sei's eyes widen comically._

_"Explain your reasoning." We're interrupted by the nurse and the doctor that follows him in. I'm allowed to go home, that's good, but I'll only be a burden to Tetsuya's parents. When the nurse and doctor leave, I do my best to explain myself._

_"Didn't want you guys to get hurt." It hurts when I speak. "You're my teammates. Teammates are people who have your back. You've helped me a lot."_

_Seijuurou sighs. "You're loyal to a fault, Alex." He says with a sigh. "How's this. Don't worry about us, do you understand me? I can do that. Do as I say, and I won't let anything like this happen to you again." Sei's eyes look honest and promising. "Do we have a deal?"_

_I nod my head. "Yes."_

My head hurts when I get up, and I can't for the life of me figure out why. It's got nothing to do with how I've slept. I feel heavy and tired, like I'm tied to a ball and chain and haven't slept at all. My body aches in ways that should be illegal, even though I'm not uncomfortable and I haven't done anything strenuous. I don't want to go to school today. 

It's then that I realize light is streaming directly into my eyes, a signal that I've overslept. I bolt upright, panic sending my heart into a frenzy. "Daiki, we overslept!" The bluenette peers up at me from tapping away at his phone, lounging on his futon. 

"It's Saturday, idiot." I blink in surprise. 

"I see." I reply. I then thump back onto my bed, my head throbbing. I try to stifle the light, but the pillow offers limited coverage, and my blanket could suffocate me. I sigh with frustration. "Daiki, do we have any painkillers?" I hear a shuffling noise and then silence. 

"No." I groan and curl into myself. "What's wrong?" Pulling the blanket over my head, I do my best to stop offending my muscles. 

"Nothing." I reply. It feels like barbs are being placed under my skin, ripping at my muscle and shredding at my skin. My stomach is threatening to relinquish its contents, and my heartbeat pounds in time with my head. I'm starting to break a sweat. 

"Alex." Daiki's voice is low and suspicious. I do my best not to shudder. 

"Yes?" My voice sounds strange, strangled, smothered, like my vocal cords are beginning to stop working. 

"Tell me what's wrong." Doesn't he know I don't take orders? My insides feel like they're quivering, like they're shivering. 

"Nothing. I'm just tired and had a little bit of a headache, that's all." I'll indulge Daiki this time, if that's what he wants. The edge of my bed dips a bit, likely from Daiki's weight. I'm tired now. All I want is to sleep this strange sensation away, so it's like it never happened. That's it- all I need to do is sleep, and everything will work itself out. Sleep sounds like a blessing. 

"You're not sick, right?" The bluenette asks. I shake my head. 

"Of course not. I don't catch things easily." I reply, flipping over so my head is buried in my pillow and the light is kept from my eyes. This sensation isn't entirely new to me. I've had it once or twice before, but this time it's worse. I can't make myself pass out, even as time flies by and the blue wunderkind doesn't move. 

"I'll be back in ten minutes. Don't go anywhere." Daiki says after another twenty. I make a muffled groan that I hope shows him I have no intention of going  _anywhere_ right now. Within a few more minutes, and after the sound of the apartment door closing, I manage to drift into a hazy half-sleep that leaves me feeling like I'm floating. My body feels heavy, but my head feels light. It's like part of me is going to float away. 

I don't know how long that lasts. I don't know how I manage to get to the bathroom in time to throw up. I don't know how I try getting back into bed only to trip over the floor. I don't know how I do it, but I make myself hurt all the worse and all I have for company are creaking wood floors and glaring white walls. My chest contracts as I pull myself together and stumble back toward my bed. My heart is racing. My body hurts and hurts and hurts. 

"You idiot!" I hear Daiki's rather outraged voice behind me. Surprised, I practically jump out of my skin before glancing back at him. 

"I had to go to the bathroom. I didn't go anywhere. I'm going back to bed." The blue-haired boy groans before he practically shoves me onto the much closer, slightly less comfortable couch. 

"Sit.  _Don't move._ Get it?" I give Daiki an unimpressed glare before sinking into the cushions and staring up at the ceiling. "Swallow." He surprises me by presenting me with a circular white pill and a glass of water. I'm half suspicious half grateful, so I thank him and down it without saying anything. The water chases the taste of medicine down my throat. Within a few minutes, my eyes are too heavy to keep open and the sensations under my skin feel like they aren't happening to me. 

"Daiki, what did you give me?" My head is getting too heavy to hold up.

"It's supposed to help you sleep, so you can sleep this off." He says, reading off the bottle. "I won't leave or do anything, so relax." It's much easier said than done in my case, but I don't have much of a choice. I drop into a drug-induced slumber.

Waking is not as easy as falling asleep. At first, I don't feel anything. I'm barely aware that any time has actually passed, and my body is a mass of weight that I can't imagine moving. My chest rises and falls, that much I can feel, but I can't help but disassociate it from myself. It doesn't feel real, like I have to breathe at all. 

I can just barely hear noises next. The TV is murmuring quietly and Daiki drops swears and a few interesting comments now and then. I can hear a few birds from outside and the creaking of the walkway outside. Daiki laughs at something the television comments on. 

I start to feel real after a while. The massive weight is now much more similar to limbs that simply refuse to move. The familiar feeling of laziness and sleep transform more fully into a dull drowsiness. Unfortunately, as sensation returns, so does the rest of me. My body doesn't hurt as much as it did when I went to sleep, but it's only barely tolerable. I'd never be able to play in this condition, and that worries me. 

I try to catch Daiki's attention, but my body refuses to move. Can I speak? I make a low humming noise to push past my haziness and manage to turn onto my side. The couch feels soft, and Daiki's lap is a nice pillow. "Hm? You awake yet?" I groan this time. My headache, although dulled, still hurts, and my limbs are painfully stiff. At least the urge to hurl has passed. 

"Daiki." I say. At least, I hope it sounds like 'Daiki'. My words are slurred like those of a drunkard's, and it's all Daiki's fault. At least he smells good. The scent of clean laundry and a little sweat and grass and dirt mingles pleasantly, with an underlying darkness. I'm on my stomach before I know it, sprawled all across Daiki's lap in whatever way seems most comfortable. He doesn't really have any complaints other than his usual moaning and groaning, and contents himself with using my back as a tray of sorts. I feel a circular shape, likely a plate, resting at mid-back. It's warm, and feels nice.

"Feel any better?" The words barely register with me, but that's fine. I'm content with simply staying here, feeling warm and loved as long fingers mess around with my hair. I make a noise that I hope sounds similar to something to affirm his statement, but the meaning is likely lost. Even though the bluenette is more than fluent in my groaning sleep-speak, this is on a whole new level. 

"Stiff." I groan. "It huuuuurts." Daiki makes a noise of interest, although his attention is likely focused on whatever program he's watching. I shift slightly and content myself with receiving the attention I have. At least I can get myself to speak more clearly. It would be nice, though, if this stiffness remained as numbed as my tongue, and as reluctant as the movement of my limbs. 

"Probably a bad idea to take another one." The blue-haired boy says, shifting slightly. 

"Are you using me as a table, Daiki?" I ask as my eyes comply in opening. The body below me stiffens before relaxing. 

"How angry would you be if I said yes?" 

"Not at all, unless you happened to spill something on me." Daiki shifts underneath me slightly. It's like this that the first string finds us. They have plenty of questions, however I can only respond with a single one. 

"Since when has it been okay for you four to just  _barge on in_ without a single knock!" I exclaim. My brain still feels like it isn't fully functional, but it's okay. I don't really mind all that much. It helps keep the embarrassment down. 

"This is getting seriously concerning. First he's eating your face, now he's using you as a table." Wakamatsu's comment sends heat racing to my cheeks. 

"You should just _shut up_." I groan, trying to hide my face into the couch cushions. My pulse is tripping over itself as my embarrassment rises. A person sniggers, one who could only be Imayoshi, since that boy seems to get off on my frequent humiliation in front of the first string players. Murder crosses my mind for a few moments. 

"What're you doin' here?" Daiki finally asks. I want to sit up. I want to sit up and scavenge for the remains of my dignity, but my body isn't being the most compliant it's ever been. I resist the urge to roll off the couch and humiliate myself further. 

It's dark outside, and I've stopped listening to the boys' conversation. It's a little sad that we can't see the stars from out here. The streetlamps and house lights and headlights from cars all drown the sky is a bath of brightness, leaving the stars to be smothered in their own darkness. 

My body finally complies in moving properly. I sit up (Daiki thankfully moved his food off of me), and attempt stretching properly. My arms feel stabs of pain, my legs feel like folding, and my stomach isn't very pleased with me. Dark blue eyes watch me carefully as I stand a little shakily and go to raid the fridge. I haven't eaten all day, and although I'm not hungry, it still seems like a good idea to have something in my stomach. Maybe something spongy, I think. Nothing all that complicated. I don't want to throw up again. 

Our fridge, unfortunately, is looking more than a little barren. The only thing remotely spongy is some deep-fried tofu, which I'm not keen on eating, and a piece of cake. Neither of those seem like good ideas, nor do they appear all that fresh. "Bread on counter." Daiki calls from the living room as I close the fridge with disappointment. 

I wonder if Daiki knew what I was looking for to begin with, or if he's just guessing. At least the counter is still clean, something that the bluenette struggles with. I can't count how many times he's left dishes or open bottles or leftovers on here, or refused to clean up some of his none-too-frequent spills. It's all good, though. I understand. Cleaning is a hassle, but Mr. Messy has been making better efforts lately. 

My thoughts are happy once I find that Daiki's managed to get some really fluffy looking white bread. I have nothing against whole wheat or anything- it's just that I prefer the fluffier, lighter texture of white bread. It's like a cloud in my mouth. 

At first I only eat a slice to test the waters, to see if I can keep food down. When that proves successful, I eat more. Three slices are more than enough to keep me from feeling hungry, although I'm starting to feel heavy and overly full. "I'm going to bed." I say, waving a hand to Daiki. "Keep it down." 

"Yeah, yeah." The blue-haired wonder replies without looking at me. Hopefully, our teammates will go home soon, and I won't have to listen do them chattering away. Why are they here anyway? Is this their new hangout? I'd rather go to an arcade or a basketball court or a public park or a mall. My apartment isn't large enough to keep this up for a long period of time. Oh, well. It can't really be helped right now. I'll be patient. 

The noise from the living room simmers down after ten minutes, when I'm slipping under the covers and drawing the blinds so that the light won't murder my eyes once it's daytime again. Daiki was right when he said that sleeping this off would be helpful. I feel better than I did this morning, and I didn't have to do anything other than sleep. Thoughts of how my homework lies neglected and how I'm much too glad I have this weekend off from work rattle about my brain, making it a little harder to sleep than it should be. I fall asleep as the lights in the living room dim down. 


	29. Chapter Twenty-Nine

Interhigh is starting today. The smell of sweat and rubber and wax taints the air around me as I warm up with the rest of Touou's team, but I'm not feeling especially happy today. Our opponents are tall and intimidating and they keep jeering at me with eyes that make me especially uncomfortable. I can't decide whether to shrink into myself or punch them in the face, and neither of those options are particularly helpful in any way.

Wakamatsu's complaining yet again about Daiki's frequent absence. Although distracted, I do my best to pay him proper attention, all the attention I can afford, as I stretch my arms out more thoroughly. "Just be happy he's showing up at all." I say with a sigh as the blond groans with frustration. "There's nothing any of us can do to make him appear more."

I warm up in less time than the others do even though I take longer to stretch out. The opposing team, some no-name from who knows where, looks like a bunch of convicts. It's rude of me to say so, to even phrase such a sentence in such a way, but I have no other method for describing them. If looks could kill, I'd probably be dead by now. Who knows? Hopefully I won't be by the end of the game. I just want to win this, nice and easy, no emotions involved and no difficulty.

From the looks of things, Daiki won't get here until the second half. I don't know what he's doing, but he's probably waiting for them to warm up properly so he'll have something to play with. If that's the case, I'll get the first half and he'll get the second. If, on the off chance he shows up within the next ten minutes, he'll get the first half and I'll get the second. I feel pity for the other team, but not enough to make me ignore their stares.

"Alex, why are they staring at you like that?" Daiki's voice surprises me as I spin to face him.

"Daiki!" I say in surprise, my mouth splitting into a grin. "You actually showed up!" The bluenette scratches the back of his head awkwardly as he dribbles a basketball carelessly.

"You didn't answer my question." He states flatly, watching Touou warm up with disinterested eyes. I shrug.

"I don't know. They've been doing it for a while now. I just want to win." Daiki sends the taller players rather evil-looking glares, ones I've never really seen before. They're enough to send chills racing down my spine.

I think there's some unspoken rule that Daiki and I can never be on the court at the same time. I don't really blame them for that, although it annoys me. Their logic makes sense. There's no game if we both are on the court, just the two of us competing with each other. It kind of makes my chest ache.

As expected, Daiki is the first to play the court. He doesn't look all that excited. If anything, it looks like Daiki just wants to get this quarter over with. I'm guessing he won't stay in for much longer than that.

It's always captivating to watch Daiki play. Whether he knows it or not, his movements on the court take my breath away. All I see are fluid steps. Everything flows gracefully into the next. Predatory. Daiki is predatory. Daiki is overwhelming and powerful and seemingly all consuming. I can't look away. 

I could probably watch him play all day and never once look away. Unfortunately, when the bluenette glances at me before continuing down his path of destruction, I know this is when I'll have to. I'm not up for watching spirits crumble or determination fade into hopelessness. This is why I'm always second on the court. My job isn't necessarily to help us win, especially since it's usually a given, but rather to build the team up just for the sake of breaking them down again. I hate my job the most out of all the things I've done. 

The two-minute break between the first and second quarters starts when I look back up. "So, the plan is for Hai-chan to come in after halftime. Any objections?" Yeah, me, but I can't say anything. I don't have that right. 

"I don't want to play anymore." Daiki says suddenly, looking at the scoreboard with disinterest. "They aren't good enough to be my opponents." 

"Daiki." I hiss furiously. "You don't just say that about other people! That's rude." Blue eyes glare daggers at me, but I meet them evenly. 

"They won't even be enough to challenge you, idiot. Look at them. There's no way for you to build them up again." He points at the other team. 

Why is it always me that has to witness the destruction of hopes and dreams? I get that the score is horrible to play against, but... it kills me inside to watch them stand tall only to fall, never to get up. My chest feels empty and dark. "Hai-chan, we're putting you in this quarter." I barely manage to acknowledge Satsuki's command. 

"Daiki..." I say when I glance back at him. "Don't say something like that around me again. I won't forgive you." I can hear Satsuki telling him off, and Imayoshi is trying to tell me something, but I'm practically dead to anything outside myself. My chest is heaving with effort and anger. 

"Heights!" I'm shocked into awareness as Imayoshi drops his hand on my head. "Let them get a few. Got it?" I glance up at him angrily.

"I know how to do this better than you do. I'll have them fixed by the end of the quarter." I reply as I knock his hand from the top of my head. For the first two minutes, I do nothing. Don't get me wrong, I'm moving and it looks like I'm putting in some sort of effort, but in all honesty, I'm just following the ball. My heart is sinking. 

We do let them shoot. They get fifteen points consecutively until Satsuki barks out another order. "Hai-chan! Time to get to work." I raise an eyebrow at the order. Don't we usually wait a bit longer? The second half is when we damage them most. I sigh, push my bangs to the side, and draw in a deep breath. "What's she doing?" 

The tall boy beside Susa looks a little too interested in my movements, and it sets me on edge. I'll just avoid him, work on moving past his teammates. I disappear from view, sprinting down the court toward the opposite hoop and waiting for my teammates to catch up. It's more fun when everyone's involved, and not just myself. We take back the lost points easily. 

"I bet you can't beat Aomine's record." My eyebrow raises in what I hope shows my vast and uncontainable irritation. 

"Why does it matter?" I reply angrily. It's hard to resist the Zone as it tries to wash over me. My mind is clearing and my observation is going into overdrive. I can't not focus, and I can't relax anymore. Not like this. My chest is beginning to feel dark and brooding. I must be crazy- I'm the only person I know who'd ever fight the Zone. 

It's embarrassing, though. Daiki can always tell what goes on in the Zone, especially since he can force his way in, but it doesn't work like that for me. My body trembles with the urge to play until I break. My Zone is too dangerous to use. My sense of self flies out the window, chased by any sense of self-preservation. I can only hold it off, just barely, and someone as dense as the bluenette is the only one who can tell. 

Daiki whispers something to Satsuki, who starts arguing with him. I can't pay them any attention. I'm trying to build these guys up, but every fiber in my body is screaming a resounding "no." I won't last long like this. I hate the Zone, I hate this game, and right now, I really hate Imayoshi. 

The emotions that plague me are fading. My eyes are tracking movements I no longer care to see. My breathing evens, my body stands erect and ready, and my skin hungers for the feel of the ball. All is replaced by a sense of calm urgency, an all-consuming desire to crush the boys before me. Consequences? Who cares about things like that? The end justifies the means, right? 

I want to push this feeling away. I want to keep my head, my sense of self. I don't want another injury. We can't all get what we ask for. I can keep the Zone in check as I manipulate passes toward Sakurai, but not all goes as planned. I turn in place, only to see a wall of solid green before me. The green does in fact turn out to be a jersey, a rather unflattering one, worn by someone taller than Daiki and Wakamatsu. My eyes widen, and I'm glad I don't have the ball. Unfortunately, boys are idiots. This one picks me up, right in the middle of the game, where everyone can see. I struggle as much as possible, although it doesn't help. 

"Oi!" Daiki's voice resounds across the court, drawing attention to my rather uncomfortable predicament. My skin crawls. Wakamatsu's voice soon chase's Daiki's as he crosses over and starts to yell. 

"Put her down! Who do you think you are, picking up a girl like that?" The blond sounds angry, and it doesn't help that Sakurai's gone into clutch mode, Imayoshi is actually widening his eyes, and Susa is looking irritated. 

The boy holding me laughs as I try to kick him away. "You shouldn't be playing. You're too short, plus you're a girl. What do you think you're doing here? Is your school really that desperate? Maybe we overestimated Touou Gakuen." He says, eyes narrowing malevolently. "If you keep doing that, I might just drop you." 

Somehow, the threat of being dropped quite violently doesn't really seem like much of a threat. I can take a beating. I know how to keep myself going. As promised, I drop like a stone to the rather unforgiving wood floor, skidding back across the waxed floor. My wrist hurts from acting as a buffer for my fall. I'm lucky it's my right- we have a better chance of winning when I don't use that hand. 

The Zone is clawing at my throat. The player is penalized, ejected from the game. My mouth splits into a hungry snarl. "Give me the ball." I say to Imayoshi, my eyes darkening as I submit to the Zone. Forget sense of self and preservation. Forget consequences and injuries. I'm ready to make this team bleed. The world rushes by in a blur of green and black and orange and brown. 

I'm not an unforgiving player. I'm lenient and usually very optimistic and kind of supportive, but I don't have the patience for any of that today. Call me the Ice Queen or a Demon or whatever floats your boat. I'm not going to focus on anything but the destruction of the other team. I don't care if it means nine injuries and a broken jaw. I'm ready to paint the floor red and stain the air with iron. I'm not a very good sportsman. 

The rest of the second quarter passes by so fast that I don't remember much of it at all. My heart is calm, my mind is rational, and my body is easily commanded. I only return to reality for a while when halftime comes about. A heavy hand ruffles my hair, and I smack it away with nothing but irritation playing across my face. "What's got your panties in a knot?" Daiki asks, bored as usual, staring at his nails before making eye contact with me. 

He freezes then, staring at me, before I huff angrily and glare at the court in front of me. "Satsuki." I can vaguely hear Daiki talking seriously before it's time to get back onto the court. I can't help but try to find some other way to vent this unusual anger. I don't know what's wrong, but all it's doing is making me play harder. I doubt there's anything seriously wrong with it. Things start to slip from me once more. I'm sinking deeper and deeper. It feels like I'm drowning. I won't be coming out for a long time, it seems. 

Things don't seem to matter anymore. My universe is centered around a round, orange ball that's too bouncy for its own good. My eyes sting when sweat drips into them, and my skin is starting to become overly damp. I'm going to burn out if this game doesn't get paced accordingly. My heart beats a steady, calm rhythm. Something's amiss, but that can be easily ignored. Nothing will get by me. 

Offense has always been my domain, even if I've played all over. Aggressive is my middle name, and competitive blood flows through my veins. I'm not afraid of playing hard, playing rough, playing dirty. All of that can easily be avoided, and all it takes is a blow to someone's spirit. I've already gotten that far. I don't need to watch the scoreboard or the clock. The scent of sweat propels me forward, the squeak of shoes on the court drives me. 

Sei's going to be angry. He hates my Zone almost as much as I do, but we've never held back from using it. If using it is what it takes to win, by all means, use the damn thing. Thoughts I try to form are silenced as I continue onward. The third quarter passes by in a blur, just like the quarter before it. A two-minute break is awarded. "How the hell did you get out of being triple-teamed?" Susa asks as I thump down on the bench. 

Triple-teamed? I don't think that happened, but whatever. I'd answer, but the game is consuming all my thoughts. I can't go back to think, I have to move forward and destroy our opponents. Winning is everything. Losers always fail, they're always wrong. Sei's mantra has saved us on more than one occasion, and I'm more than willing to comply with it. Sei's been right many times. I'll place my faith in him. 

The faint thought that Tetsuya would be disappointed in my thinking almost snaps me out of the Zone, but realizing this is what it takes to win brushes the instant aside. I have to win. I need to win. There's no way we'll continue if we lose here. We have to continue, we need to win Interhigh. I want to play against Kagami and Tetsuya. I want to play against Seijuurou. I want to play Ryouta and Shintarou and Atsushi. I won't let a stupid little team like this one stop us. 

"-ai! Hai!" I glance slightly at the voice that repeats my name like a broken record. "Time to go back out." They won't be pulling me out? That's good, especially since my blood is boiling and my temper's rising and my body's ready to burst into action. I won't be content until this team grovels or gives up, especially after picking me up. It won't take long either way. Sei taught me how to play, taught me how to think, how to act. I'll put everything on the line this time. My teammates are capable of picking up any slack I leave behind. I'll trust them this time.

My heart trips for the first time all game. My breath hitches. I don't know what just happened, but something didn't like it. The fourth quarter is almost completely smooth sailing. My heart starts tripping more often. My movements are slowing ever so slightly. We only have two minutes left. I will play until I break. 

I think, in some weird, twisted way, I do break. My thoughts run rampant, all focused on not losing this one game. We're nowhere close to losing. My eyes are looking for patterns. The other team has given up. What am I supposed to do? I'm sinking too far into the Zone, and it feels like I'm the only one who knows this. Can Daiki read this far into the Zone? His ability with it is astounding, but he has his limits as well. My pulse is racing. Sweat is dripping down the side of my face. I can't help but take huge, heaving breaths every once in a while. What am I to do? I can't escape the Zone no matter how hard I struggle to reach normality. I always lose. 

Why is nobody bothering to stop me? Why do I have to torment myself with the faces of defeat and the knowledge that the only one who ever challenges me is Daiki? Why can't I give up right now, go home, get some sleep, stop hurting? Why do I put up with being used in this way? Why can't my captain pull me out, my manager bench me? Why do I need to see this every time I play? 

I wonder if I hate this game. I wonder if it makes me gnash my teeth and snarl at others. I wonder what good basketball has ever done me, and why I'm even bothering to play anymore. I wonder if my thoughts are painted across my face, and if they're plain as day to those who watch. I wonder if Kagami or Tetsuya or Seijuurou or even Daiki are disappointed in me. I wonder why it matters. 

The game is called soon enough, and all I can focus on is why I have to win. Why can't I go home? Why can't I lose? Why does my Zone overwhelm me? Someone's speaking to me, but my Zone only filters all the noise out. I wonder why I'm always stuck like this. 


	30. Chapter Thirty

I don't know how to get out of the Zone. For the others, there has always been a set time limit, something like 10 or 15 minutes, maybe even 20, but such a thing does not exist for me. I remain in the Zone until I can be extracted from it. The longest time I've ever been in the Zone was a maximum of two hours, with Seijuurou present and worrying. I hope he's here, because this is promising to be my longest Zone submersion yet. I don't want things to remain this way, but it seems there's nothing I can do.

I know what the others look like in the Zone, although I've only ever seen Ryouta and Daiki enter into it. Their faces used to scare me. Nothing could be seen of their personalities other than determination and a ridiculous sense of calm. I don't know if I mimic any of those, but I hope I don't have the overly intense, nearly blank look in my eyes that they have. Sometimes their eyes hid flames, other times they were as blank as a could be. I wonder, faintly, if I have the same eyes that they always have.

I don't know how I've been snapped out of the Zone in the past. It's much worse when I struggle with the Zone, like it's trying to overcompensate or it's getting revenge or making up for lost time. When I enter it willingly, I'm usually able to glide out of it, but only after we're done playing. All I can focus on, however, are thoughts of what my next play is going to be.

My body is getting heavy and tired. At this rate, the Zone will wear me out before I can be dragged out of it. I don't think I'll be coming back for a while. My ability to recognize that we're no longer playing is flickering in and out of existence.

My feet move without my consent. Am I being led away? Probably. I don't ever seem to be able to function off the court in this state. What should my next play be? How can I dodge screens more efficiently? Everything and nothing simmers in the back burners of my mind. I want to know where the ball is. The ball? Why am I looking for it? The damn thing is right in front of me. Why does Daiki have it? Why is he opposing me? Does it matter? No. It doesn't. I will play until I break. I will be victorious. They'd all want nothing less of me.

Why is Daiki walking closer? Spinning the ball on his finger so casually, it seems he's taunting me. Doesn't he know I have a temper? What's this? He's just handing me the ball, pointing at a hoop I've never seen in my life before, shrugging and standing in front of me. "Come and get me." He says. I think that's what he's saying. Does it matter anymore? No. Time to play until I break.

I'm ready to go, ready to pounce, ready to run, when it seems I've reached a critical limit. My face contorts, my knees buckle, and my chest begins to heave. I can't move. I can't make myself stop moving, I can't make myself continue moving. What is at fault? I haven't broken yet, so why am I frozen like this? "Come back, Alex." Daiki's voice seems disembodied, floating about within my skull. "Time to come back." What if I don't want to? I want to play. I want to break. I want to win.

Why are tears dripping down my face? Why is Daiki shielding me from view? Why am I grabbing onto his jersey like some lost child? A faint noise reaches my ears, and I can barely recognize the sound of sobbing. I'm sure it's from me. "C'mon, Alex. A little further and you'll be out." I can feel a breeze now, the feel of rough concrete beneath my legs. My head rests against a chest, and a jersey is held in my white-knuckled grip. "There ya go. Took you long enough."

I'm not a pretty crier. When stuff like this happens, everything comes out. I guess it's like I'm unleashing everything on an emotional level to compensate for my physical exhaustion. Everything I've felt since my last time stuck in the Zone surges forward, making me something of a wreck. I think my heart is breaking. "I hate it." I repeat the phrase so many times that it could possibly become my new catch-phrase. Luckily, we're all saved from that atrocity.

"I know." Daiki murmurs, silencing me. "You hate it. I know. You always do." Is it bad that I almost miss the Zone? There's no such thing as emotion there. There's nothing but clear, rational thought, and the drive, passion, ability to conquer and consume. But here, here I am stuck, caught in between a sense of security and screaming fragility. "You'll feel better. You always do."

Yeah, that was then, but what about now? I wonder if everything is really the same. I do my best to silence myself, to stop my strange reaction to returning to reality. "I'm sorry." I murmur. "I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with me." The bluenette says nothing in response. He only runs his fingers though my hair, gently and slowly, until I wipe my face and pull away.

"We're going home. Satsuki can tell us anything she has to say later." I nod sleepily. The blue-haired wonder grabs my hand, pulls me up, and walks toward the exit. I'm just happy that my apartment is ridiculously close. Long, skilled fingers intertwine with my own, leading me gently, but rather relentlessly, as Daiki's strides are much longer than my own.

The walk home is deathly silent. The silence seems stifling, suffocating, smothering. I want to say something, anything, everything, but my mouth won't move and I'm doing nothing but yawning. Daiki is left to navigate by himself, something usually ill advised in most cases.

My body is stiff and sore, unwilling to comply to commands without voicing violent protests. My ankle is sending throbs of pain up the sides of my legs. I hope we don't have too much farther to walk, because I won't be able to hold out much longer. Yawns are spilling from my lips, and my eyes are watery. I'm like a toddler in need of a nap.

My chest feels lighter than before, but I still feel unhappy. "Another block and we'll be there." Daiki grumbles as he helps me dodge an angry cyclist. I kinda just want to take a nap right here on the sidewalk. The fact that the Zone drains all your energy is no lie. It's ends up being a serious problem for me, and there's nothing I can do but sleep it off and eat something with a ton of calories. Sei actually used to be in charge of making sure I got my energy back in time for our next game or practice. I got plenty of sleep on those days, and more food than I wanted to eat.

It's not all bad, though. Daiki is softer than usual today. It's as though some sort of switch has flipped, and he's gone into caretaker-mode. It's usually the other way around, I'd like to think, since he lives with me, but when the Zone is involved, Daiki is in charge. I don't really get it sometimes, but I have no reason to complain. Daiki knows what it takes to keep me going, so it's fine by me.

The walk up the stairs to my apartment is a little treacherous since someone upstairs probably spilled an enormous bucket of water, and my footing is more uncertain than usual. We both know piggyback rides up the stairs is a bad idea, so between Daiki's warm hand and the cool railing, I have most of the support I need. I just have to make sure I don't trip, fall, and hurt myself. Unfortunately, my footing is not as precisely picked as it normally would be. I slip several times, only to have Daiki pull me upright before I can fall backward or trip forward. Daiki's reliable like that. I'm glad he's with me.

"Ten more steps." Daiki warns as I continue forward. My thoughts have wound down to little things like how I'm hungrier than usual and that my leg hurts. I don't think of the homework I'll have to finish or the work I have tomorrow or how I might've forgotten to lock the door somehow. It's probably good that those thoughts have no room within the confines of my mind, especially since I'd just become stressed and grumpy, a mixture that usually leads to people getting hit with flying objects. I promise, it doesn't happen often, but it _does_ happen.

It feels like it takes longer than usual to get inside. The mere thought of staying awake longer than I have to sets me on edge, and makes my mouth spill a few more enormous yawns that I try to cover up, but fail at doing. "Go to sleep, Alex." Daiki says as he pries my ancient fridge open. Okay, it isn't all that old, but it sounds old since the door creaks when we open it. It usually cracks a few laughs when we actually manage to make some joke about it, but today is not one of those days. Daiki's looking for something with a ton of calories, and I'm looking for sweats and a tank top. He evidently finds what he's looking for before I do since he walks in as I'm redressing myself.

There's no blushing this time from either one of us, just a silent acceptance that our timing is as unfortunate as usual. I don't tell him to get out. He just sits himself down beside me as I slip my shirt on over my head.

There are certain foods that Seijuurou demands I keep at home. They're high calorie and usually pretty healthy, and he's practically forced all of us to know what to do with them. My so-called "demand foods" are mostly peanut butter, granola (which I'm starting to detest), and bananas. The only reason I still have them is for purposes like these. Daiki's got a couple of bananas, a jar of peanut butter, some bread, and a pack of chips, which is probably mostly for him.

I watch with disinterest as Daiki slices the bananas, puts them on a piece of bread, spreads peanut butter on another piece, and smacks them together for a sandwich that threatens to fall apart. He cuts in half carefully and offers it to me. I don't refuse, partly because I'm starving, and partly because Daiki making _anything_ is about as rare as naturally-occurring magenta hair.

The sandwich tastes fine, thanks, and does a decent job of filling the gaping hole I call my stomach. I'm practically force-fed three of them, until I groan that I can't eat anymore or I'll burst into a million pieces or I'll throw up. The bluenette gives up on feeding me. "C'mere." He says, slinging an arm around me and leaning my head against his chest. "Why'd you get stuck this time?"

I sigh as silently as I can before curling into his side, where warmth seeps into my cold skin. "It came too soon. I didn't want to go in, so I tried to stay out." Daiki huffs in amusement it seems.

"You're the only person I know who'd _ever_ not want to go into the Zone, ya know that?" He says, resting his chin on the top of my head. "You're insane. Completely crazy." I give an amused noise in response, smiling slightly into his shoulder.

"You're _just_ figuring that out? And here I thought you knew what you were getting into, Daiki." I say with equal amusement.

"Nah, I knew." Daiki replies fluidly, holding me a little closer. "I just wanted to make sure you knew that I knew." Sometimes Daiki seems adorable, ya know? Sweet and cute and funny. As much as I love that side of him, his more aggressive, dominating side is something I'd like to see more of. I won't say it aloud though. No, I'll never admit something like that. Daiki is Daiki, and I like him just the way he is. There's not a thing I'd change about him.

Leaning against Daiki is relaxing, to be honest. I feel safe and warm and comfortable with my arms wrapped around his neck, sitting in his lap, head against his shoulder, legs around his waist. Daiki is always comfortable, although I suppose that's just my opinion.

I can hear his heartbeat from here. It's slow, and steady, and reassuring in some strange way. I wonder if Daiki has ever heard my heartbeat, how it trips and races depending on what we're doing. I wonder if he notices how our hands feel against each other, or if our difference in height is now more pronounced to him. Daiki is normally oblivious to many things, so I'm not so sure he'd notice any of those things. I wouldn't really blame him. Maybe I'm just overly aware of this, like I am with almost everything else.

I'm glad that it's quiet. There's nowhere I'd rather be right now. Sitting in this silence allows me to quiet the thoughts that run rampant within my mind. It lets me slowly unwind the muscles that have grown taunt and uneasy across my shoulders and down my back. It lets my feelings simmer down to a quiet calm that blankets everything. Time doesn't have much sway anymore, and I'll just allow it to pass by at any pace it wishes. It doesn't really matter anyway. Today my time is limitless, and I'll use it to my advantage.

I can hear the birds outside. They're cheerful and sincere, like the laughter of children. They're singing, and it sounds nice today. I almost wish I was a bird, twittering happily day in and day out, without a care in the world. No school, no job, no sport, no people. Just daylight and flying and singing and eating. Hopping about and taking flight on whim, no longer having to be so harshly grounded to the earth.

Daiki sighs into my hair, a signal that our moment could be coming to an end. I'm sure he'll push me off, but instead he simply shifts in place, brings his arms under my legs, and carries me as he walks into the living room. He goes right for the sofa, thumping down, still holding into me. A click sounds to my left, the remote turning the television on, and the sounds of speaking drifts to me softly. I groan in response. "Turn it up a little." I murmur.

Daiki complies wordlessly. I can just barely catch the televised game from here. "Who's playing?" I ask, trying to turn my head around, but failing to do so.

"Rakuzan." My body stiffens. "It's going predictably."

"Rakuzan's victory is assured." I murmur. "Always has been, since Seijuurou is involved." Daiki makes a noise of affirmation.

It's easy to see why when you've played for the redhead. He has an incredibly efficient way of doing things, and he manages to do everything he wants with a very limited amount of risk. Sei is incredible. Everything is taken into account, everything is analyzed. His plans are easily adaptable, although that's almost never necessary. I'd be jealous of him if he hadn't taught Satsuki and given me tips and pointers. I don't want to play against him. That's probably the only time I'll slide into the Zone with absolutely no hesitation. Seijuurou is not one to be trifled with. I might actually break if I play him. 

The noises from the television aren't all that interesting. It's obvious enough that Rakuzan will win this with ease. Sei probably doesn't even have first-string players on the court, but reserve ones. He's always like that, saving the best for last. But who knows? Maybe he does have his regulars on the court, along with that new shadow I've heard bits and pieces about. I wonder if he's like Tetsuya, or if he's yet another twisted mind that will comply thoughtlessly with Sei's wishes. Oh, well. If it's Sei's team, it's sure to be good. 

Have I nothing to do today? I don't think I'm thinking straight. I have work tomorrow morning. I should get ready, take a shower, get going so that I can prepare for the next day. I should start my homework so my grades don't drop, and I should put my jersey in the hamper so I remember to wash it. All my thinking is generally for naught. Even though I tell myself I'll do it, the reality of the situation is that no matter how much I'd like to do these things, my body won't let me move like I want to. I'm stuck here, resting, which is probably what I should be doing anyway. I just don't like being useless like this. At least we don't have another game today, and our next game seems to be Sunday. We're lucky, I think. I'm fairly sure we've been given a by for tomorrow. My manager will be happy that I'm able to show up for work. 

My manager is too sweet for her own good. She lets me take time off for basketball and softball unquestioningly, allows me sick days, and still pays me slightly above minimum wage. I'm endlessly grateful for her unwavering support, and I wonder if she hasn't adopted me in her own way. I'm lucky to work for such a person, and I've no right to complain about work in the slightest. 

Daiki's supportive too, in his own way. Taking care of someone like me isn't very easy, and my moods flip at the turn of a dime depending on the day, something that I'm struggling to moderate. He's unchanging, and that makes him reliable. I smile into his shoulder. 


	31. Chapter Thirty-One

There's some commotion in the living room, and the only reason I'm even going to wander in is because I've just gotten off work, and I have a ton of leftover treats. I suppose it would be best to change out of my uniform as well.

"I'm home." I say as I slip off my shoes.

"Welcome back!" The sound of Mrs. Akashi's voice surprises me. I offer her a smile. "Where were you?"

"I was at work. I just got off my shift." I reply cheerfully. "I work at a sweets shop. Would you like any?" The pink cardboard box is placed on the table, opened to reveal an assortment of pastries. I'm very concerned as to how they got in. Perhaps Daiki answered the door? But there's blue hair no in sight. I wonder if Sei has a key of his own, someway or another.

"How did you get in?" I make sure the question is phrased as politely and peacefully as possible so I can mask my surprise to the best of my ability.

"I called Daiki." Sei replies. I raise an eyebrow.

"I'm surprised he'd even be awake." I respond, unclipping my nametag and tugging my hair out of its high ponytail. The redhead gives me a very noncommittal shrug. I bet he just terrified the bluenette. "Anyway, was there something you wanted to talk about?"

"Just checking in on you." Mrs. Akashi says pleasantly. "We saw your game on TV last night. It was a surprise for both of us." She's probably referencing her husband.

"It was on TV? Seijuurou's was on TV so I listened to that one, but I didn't think ours would be, too." I wonder if they think less of me for the way I played, for how I had to be led off the court.

"You fought it again." Sei's comment surprises me once more, but I don't deny the statement.

"Don't I normally do that?" I reply, sitting across from the Akashis. He shakes his head in disapproval.

"You got stuck again. I saw." I scratch the back of my head.

"Ah. That's unfortunate." I say, reaching over to steal a cookie and bite into it. Walnuts and chocolate mingle pleasantly across my tongue. "It worked itself out, though. It was a mistake, but it was rectified."

"New vocabulary? I'm glad you're still learning." Sei's father interrupts our conversation. I offer him a grin.

"I do my best to expand my known vocabulary. I have to, if I want to be fluent." The door opens suddenly, slamming against the wall and closing suddenly.

"I'mreallysorrybutjustbarewithme." Kagami's voice is familiar and rough and sort of strained. I hear barking outside.

"A dog." I say with a sigh. "Kagami-"

"C'mon out, Kagami-kun." Tetsuya's voice filters through the door. "I'm sure Hai-chan doesn't want you in there." The redhead gives me a most pitiful look, only to start glaring at what I assume is the bluenette, who I can hear emerging from my bedroom.

"Tetsuya, would you mind moving Nigou so that we can herd Kagami out?" I ask, sauntering toward the door. "I'd rather not keep him in here at the moment."

"Ah, just a minute." Comes the reply. It takes some effort to pry the redhead from the door. I then hold my hands out expectantly, knowing full well that Tetsuya will place Nigou in my hands. The ball of fluff is delivered silently, and I leap to the other side of Kagami as rapidly as possible.

The redhead looks nothing short of betrayed as he darts out the door. I release the fluffy husky and allow it to roam out the door in time to bark at the rapidly fleeing Kagami. "Good work as usual, Tetsu." I say cheerfully. "He should really learn the importance of knocking." The bluenette offers me a smile before vanishing. I close my door once more.

"Sorry!" I say, scratching the back of my head. "Daiki, I hadn't realized you were here. For some reason I thought you went out." The bluenette steals what I assume is a bear claw and goes to raid the fridge.

"Out of peanut butter again." He says. "And bananas. And bread." I can sense the stares of the Akashis, and it's a bit more than awkward.

"If you want them, you can go and get them. Otherwise, wait until Wednesday." The boy raises an eyebrow before noticing our rather redheaded guests.

"Mr. and Mrs. Akashi. Seijuurou." Daiki's voice almost gives away the discomfort that I see in the twitching of his fingers.

"Do... you two live together?" Mrs. Akashi asks. I'm worried about making her angry or tainting the way she sees me, but I nod nonetheless.

"We do." I can only assume that Daiki's met them before.

"Who... which teammate of yours is this?" Mr. Akashi sounds calmer about this.

"Aomine Daiki. He's Touou's Power Forward." I say fluidly. I wonder if I should mention anything else when Seijuurou cuts in.

"Alex and Daiki have been dating a while. A month or two, I believe." He doesn't bother to confirm that with either of us. "Daiki stays here when his parents won't have him." Great, now the parental units are looking at the blue-haired wonder in concern.

I can't explain away Daiki's problems. Those are his own business, and for me to draw upon them as excuses of some kind would be like trampling across his trust. I don't offer the redheaded adults any sort of commentary. "What kind of trouble are we talking about, Aomine-kun?" They ask in falsely sugarcoated words.

The bluenette offers a chillier glance than usual. "We don't get along." He says frostily. "Differences in opinion and stuff."

I want to walk across the room and slip my fingers between his own. I want to wrap my arms around his torso. He saves me the trouble by seating himself next to me. I hold his hand as tightly as I dare.

I want my guardians to accept Daiki for the way he is. Even though I'm sure they don't approve, that they're sure to think he's a bad person for no reason, they should at least factor in Sei's connection to him, even if they disregard how tightly I'm holding his hand. "You two haven't been doing anything inappropriate, right?" Mrs. Akashi asks hesitantly.

I shake my head and shift my weight. "Nope." I answer calmly. This discussion is going to make me blush. "We have more common sense than that." Should I wonder if they approve of Daiki? I've never wondered about that sort of thing before. If he makes me happy, I don't need anyone's approval. I just hope Daiki doesn't snicker.

My new mother opens her mouth to no doubt embarrass me when the door slams open. "Hai-chan! I heard you came back with pastries!" squeals Satsuki. My eyes widen with surprise.

"Satsu-" My would-be greeting is cut off by a very tight embrace, most of which is cleavage. I try not to suffocate.

"Do you have any elephant ears? Or cake? The cherry ones you guys make are so sweet!" My face is turning red, and I can't make any noise to stop her. I tap her arm quickly. It's become ridiculously hard to breath. She relinquishes me as quickly as what appears to be possible for her.

"Cherry cake. _One_ slice. Two elephant ears." I croak, moving to get some water. "Take what you want." The water moves down my throat sluggishly.

"On a different note," Sei says smoothly, "don't play in the Touou-Seirin match." I instantly start choking on water, my eyes widening rapidly.  _This again?_

"What?" I cough out, trying to catch my breath. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me." Sei's voice is flat and firm.

"Akashi-kun..." Satsuki tries to reason with the redhead while anger boils in my blood. Even Daiki says something. All is silent, however, when the glass in my hand breaks. I stare at the shattered glass in surprise.

"Ah, my bad. My hand slipped." I say flatly. I bend down and pick up the glass, hidden by the counter. The little pieces are easy to pick up, even though they cut my hands in a few places. I rinse the blood once all the pieces are gone.

"Give me your hand." Daiki's voice is rough and a little irritated, I think. I shake my head.

"They're shallow. Doesn't matter." I reply as I wash my hands. The bluenette grabs my hands.

"Hold still, stubborn woman." Daiki places band-aids over the two cuts that bleed most, and one more over a small cut on my pinky. My eyes turn to the calculating redhead as soon as Daiki is done.

"Tell me your reasoning." I say coolly. "I see no reason why I shouldn't. It's the only game I'm looking forward to."  _Why are you insisting on this?_

The redhead shakes his head _no_. "What you're looking for isn't there. Seirin will break if both of you play. You have no self-control when it comes to how hard you compete. It'll be a waste of time, and it will let you down." I try my best not to look annoyed.

"I'll consider your point, but I still plan to play." I say firmly. "I want to play Seirin." My lips curl into a frown. "Besides, at their current level, they'd need a warm-up before playing Daiki. I know how to play a part like that." 

"Don't wanna play Seirin." Daiki growls. Satsuki gives him a reprimanding glare, one that never ceases to amuse me. 

"There." I say flatly, pointing at the bluenette. "That solves it. Even if this one changes his mind, I can share. I owe their ace another match since our last one got cut short." Sei raises an eyebrow. 

"You shouldn't play them." He says flatly. I'm starting to feel irritated with the redhead. 

"That isn't your decision, Seijuurou. I play for Touou, not Rakuzan. Satsuki and my coach can figure out if they want me to play, and I'll accept their decision." As much as I try to cloud the annoyance leaking into my blood, it still makes an appearance in my voice. It seems there's nothing I can do to keep my temper in check. 

"I'm always right." I wonder why Sei's parent's, my guardians, aren't saying anything to us. I wonder why they appear to be monitoring this discussion with the most placid expressions I've ever seen. The only emotion I can sense in the room is coming from  _me_. 

"Right and wrong don't matter when it comes to this. Whether I play or not isn't your decision." I answer firmly, trying to calm the boiling of my blood. "You might be right. You could be wrong. Nothing's as certain as you think it is." 

"You always were a pessimist." Sei says as he inspects his nails with all the calm in the world. "I was right in the past. I'll be right about this, too. Consider this your warning." Is it only me? Am I the only one upset by this intrusion of my playing schedule? Why am I the only one who feels like violence? I wonder if he can sense the thoughts that cross my mind. 

"I have an obligation to my team to play in as many games as I'm wanted in. Seeing as you're neither my coach, nor my manager, nor my team captain, unfortunately, you have no say in whether I play Seirin or not. My apologies. I'll take your statement into careful consideration and be sure to give it plenty of thought before I make my decision." Do I sound like ice? My words have more venom than I'd anticipated. I guess it can't be helped. Following directions has always made my teeth grind and my jaw clench, no matter whom the orders come from. This  _suggestion_ however, isn't one I plan to follow. I'd rather break my wrist.

"I totally forgot!" Satsuki squeals suddenly, making me jump at least an inch or two. I drag my eyes away from the calm redhead and look at the pinkette carefully. "Mr. Wantanabe wanted to see you! Something about a tournament that's happening after school this week? He wants to see if you can make it! We better get going!" My surprise is more than evident when she grabs my wrist. 

"Seijuurou mentioned that you were playing softball. Isn't that a bit much for a high school student?" Mrs. Akashi asks suddenly. My head turns fast enough to give me whiplash. I blink in surprise. 

"It hasn't been a problem." I say fluidly. "If it becomes one, I'll solve it." 

"We need to go..." Satsuki says as she drags me forcefully out the door. I blink in surprise. If Coach Wantanabe has anything to tell me, he would've done it at practice on Friday, or send me an email or a text or  _anything but going through Satsuki._ I'm not about to call her out on this, but I detest lying. I'm sure she's reasoning that it's for my own good, that she can't avoid it at all, but none of those are gonna fly. I just won't let them. 

I say nothing until we're a few blocks away. "Satsuki, why did you just lie to five people?" I ask, raising an eyebrow to make sure she knows I'm not all that impressed. It isn't my job to police my friends, and it isn't my job to teach them right from wrong at this point, but I'll let them know where to draw the line. The pinkette presses her lips together. 

"You looked like you were going to jump Akashi-kun." Satsuki says hesitantly, fuchsia eyes looking incredibly cautious. I open my mouth to protest when she interrupts. "I know you wouldn't, but I thought you should get outside before you snapped or something. You already cut your hands, and broke a glass, and glared at him. You don't need to have his parents see you practically murder their son with your eyes." I press my lips into a thin line and try my best not to sigh loudly. 

"I guess you're right." I say as we walk into a clothing shop. "Why are we going in here?" She gives me a devilish smile. 

"I need your opinion on something~!" The pink-haired girl chirps, dragging over toward some all too familiar racks. Dresses and other rather girlish articles of clothing flood my vision.  _I am so killing someone._

Three hours, several headaches, and the promise of gyouza pass before I'm finally allowed to escape the pink-walled boutique. "Gyouza, gyouza!" I chirp cheerily, bouncing next to Satsuki. The pinkette offers me a long-suffering sigh, opens her wallet, and drags me into a small shop. It's her fault that I didn't eat earlier. Now she has to suffer with my insatiable appetite. I'm allowed an enormous to-go box of dumplings. They're really more like pot stickers. I guess they  _are_ pot stickers, but  _gyouza_ sounds so much more dignified. Less clingly, for sure. 

I want to go home now. I want to sleep, and share my food with Daiki since I ordered too much out of habit, and watch TV and maybe play some basketball. We have a game tomorrow, so maybe no basketball, but I'm up for a jog or the cages or hell, even doing Daiki's homework. I just want to keep myself busy, although I don't know why. It's okay though. Busy isn't bad at all. Busy sounds good. Maybe I'll check in at work and see if I can get some extra hours in so my bills don't look so daunting. 

I don't want the Akashis in my apartment again, but I refuse to kick them out; rather, they can come, but they can't tell me what to do in my own place. I don't dislike them. Mrs. Akashi is sweet, and Mr. Akashi is firm, and Sei is Sei. They've done more than enough to protect me. I'm infinitely grateful toward them, and I can hardly comprehend how much I owe them, but I won't hand over my free will that easily. That, despite however much time I spend here, is something I can never allow to slip away. I'm just that type of person, I suppose. I have trouble fitting in and going with the flow. 

"If they're inside, you play nice." Satsuki warns in her usual mothering tone. "Do that, and I'll buy you the coconut buns you love so much." My eyes brighten at the thought of sweet buns. I had them when Sei went to China for a week over summer break. Knowing my appetite for sweets, and Atsushi's addiction, he brought some back for us to try. Atsushi wasn't a huge fan, although he was happy to try it. Fortunately, they were saved from being wasted since I had a little too, and found myself addicted, I suppose. They've been my favorite sweet ever since. 

It takes a long while to reach the apartment again, especially since Satsuki keeps stopping to buy things, like clothing, and making it up to me by getting me more food. All in all, an hour to return isn't as bad as it could be, although I've gotten to know Satsuki's measurements by heart, and have memorized the interior of a few too many shops. I also now know what a halter top is. I didn't feel an urge to know that. 

The apartment is void of the Akashis, although Mrs. Akashi did leave me a note in neat, tiny script stating that she'd like me to call her after the tournament ends. Daiki is here, though, and gladly relieves me of some of my food. Satsuki ups and leaves, allowing me to curl into the bluenette's side and try my best not to allow him to take all my food. "Daiki, do you think I shouldn't play?" I ask, glancing up at him. The bluenette doesn't break eye contact with the television screen as he relies to me. 

"Isn't that your choice? How stupid do you gotta be to realize that he's testing you?" He answers. I smile to myself. 

"Yeah, it is my choice." I say. "Let's see if Seijuurou likes the results he'll get." 


	32. Chapter Thirty-Two

I'm excited. I'm excited, and I'm also incredibly nervous. I'm nervous, and I'm shaking like a leaf. I'm shaking, and I'm grinning like a fool, teeth showing and all. My pulse is going far too fast to be healthy, but I don't mind. It's healthy to be nervous before a game, before an important event. It makes your performance better once you smooth things out. All I need to do is take this extra adrenaline and put it to good use. It won't be hard.

It's really no fun to play no-name teams that refuse to put up much of a challenge. I'm pretty sure that Daiki's coming to this game, unlike the last two, since we're playing Seirin this time around. I could be wrong, though. I'm pretty sure he went to scout out Kagami's talent, and when he came back, all he said was that he was hungry and wanted the tournament to be over. I guess we differ in that sense. I want this tournament to continue on into eternity, until I can't play anymore. Things are going smoothly, we're on a roll, I'm too ecstatic to stop here. I want to play forever and ever. It's too bad things don't work like that. 

Satsuki's looking at me strangely. I think she can read my mind. She's known me so long that I'm sure it's more than possible that she knows what I'm thinking at this point, but I like to think I'm not so predictable. It can't really be helped either way, but if it saves me the trouble of voicing my thoughts, I have no issue with being predictable. She's probably worried about how we can't seem to reach Daiki by phone. 

"Hai-san, are you sure you can't get Aomine on your phone?" Imayoshi asks as I re-lace my shoes for the umpteenth time. Somehow, my tying skills aren't up to par today. I give the dark-haired captain an even glance. 

"Hm? If he isn't answering you, what makes you think he'll answer me?" I reply, unlacing my shoes once more. "They're never tight enough..." 

"Hai-chan, stop tying your shoes and try calling Aomine-kun!" Satsuki exclaims, pulling my hands away from the untied laces. I give her an unimpressed glance before dialing the bluenette's number. It rings. Rings, and rings, and rings some more until I get his voicemail. I sigh loudly, close the phone, and give Imayoshi a shake of my head. 

"Got his voicemail. It did ring though, so it's not like the phone is off." I say, tightening my laces. "Satsuki, why don't you try calling him? He might've been sleeping or something. Who knows, with that one." The pinkette gives me a very, very suspicious glance before dialing Daiki's number. I finally find the perfect tightness for my laces. 

My strands of unruly hair are tugged back for a ponytail, high and brushing the nape of my neck as usual. My bobby pins, clinging to my shirt as usual, are tugged free. I hold them up to Satsuki, and can only feel disappointment when she holds up a single finger. "A one bobby problem? Does that even exist? Last time I played their ace he took up three!" I say once she gets off the phone. 

"He'll be here for the second half." Satsuki says apologetically. 

"Satsukiiii, it can't be a one bobby problem! The ace along took three pins, and there's Tetsuya to worry about as well! How many do I need?" She looks a little miffed that I'm arguing with her judgment, which, to her credit, is usually correct. I wonder if I look more disappointed than usual. I wonder if I look desperate. I want a challenge. Anyone who tells me that Seirin is weak has to be lying- they're undefeated so far. Didn't they win against Shintarou and Ryouta? A single bobby is what it took for the no-names. It can't be right. 

"Hai-chan, at this point, you're seeing a single bobby problem." Satsuki says. It's not like it's just said flat out, blunt and a little brutal. It's like she's breaking bad news to me. I guess, in some twisted way, she is. I want a challenge out of Seirin. I want to be pushed to the limit. There's no need for me to play someone who can't get my blood pumping. An eerie calm wipes away the remainder of my thoughts. 

The change must be frightfully obvious, especially since Satsuki looks up from her phone just to do a double take. "Hai-chan?" I adjust my ponytail and forget to acknowledge Satsuki's call. If Seirin is weak in Satsuki's eyes, then so be it. They beat Shintarou and Ryouta, both of whom are players I admire. I don't want to think that those two are weak, but I can't help it. I'll just have to put Seirin back in their place. 

Who is Seirin, a new, no-name team, to beat the Generation of Miracles? The five, no, the six who acknowledged me as teammates are not to be looked down upon. I have to give Seirin some credit, though. Having Tetsuya in a battle against the main Miracles is a smart move. It's too bad that Tetsuya has always served as a shadow. 

I wonder if he knows that I'm equally as capable of vanishing. That I push that power to my team, because to hide myself is useless. I wonder if Tetsuya will acknowledge how much I've grown since Teiko. The chances are slim when it comes to Seirin's victory. I have a duty to the other Miracles to make that chance fall to zero. 

Crushing spirits is my specialty, and it's something I detest with every fiber of my being. I'm not the type of person who is malicious by nature, who takes pleasure in the collapse of hopes and dreams, but I am the type of person who will adopt that nature if my team needs it. Will I have to crush Seirin's dream? Unfortunately, it seems the answer is yes. Will I enjoy it? That's a no. I want Tetsuya to have his basketball acknowledged just as much as he does. I'm all for team play, for teamwork, for camaraderie. I'll acknowledge his basketball no matter where I go or who I play. No matter how much I like Tetsuya, I won't allow him to surpass me. I've worked as hard as he has, or at least I'd like to think so. 

I'm a bad person that way. I want him to succeed. I want him to win. I want my best friend to be as happy as humanly possible, yet here I am. Here I am, trying to crush Tetsu's team, trying to destroy his hopes of beating Daiki and me. Here I am, opposing him in every possible way. What kind of best friend am I? I just hope that Tetsuya can forgive me. I won't hold back. I owe him that much. 

The court is wider, longer, and bigger than usual. The lights are brighter than I remember them to be. I'm half hoping that Daiki will show up sooner than anticipated so I don't have to play against Tetsu anymore. I don't want to hurt the friendship that took me so long to develop. I don't want to lose something over a game like this. I almost want to be pulled from the game. 

That isn't something I can afford. If my feelings, these ridiculous feelings, get in the way of playing a game seriously, I'll never forgive myself. Tetsuya would never forgive me for not taking this game seriously. To go easy on someone out of pity is crueler than a crushing defeat. I'd rather earn a win after a thousand losses than win a hundred games based on the pity of others. I'm sure that the feeling is mutual. 

My stomach is throwing a riot, and my legs are threatening to collapse. How long has it been since I've felt this anxious? I haven't felt this sort of thing since the first few Teiko days. I want it to disappear, but when else will I feel this nervous? Yes, this is necessary, to tell me that I'm not invincible. I might be good, but I am not great. I need to win this game. I have to prove that I've improved, that I'm on par with the other Miracles. I've played with them, now I can play against them. I have nothing to fear. I didn't go through all that training to be defeated here. I didn't get all those injuries, have all those sleepless nights, run all those laps to stop here. I want to win. I won't let myself crumple here. 

The game will be starting soon. Too soon, it feels, but soon enough. It's no use to put it off any further. I can make this work to my advantage. Sei taught me many things, and the most valuable among them was to never accept defeat. A win is a win any way I get it. I'm not the type to fight dirty, but I am the type to do what I must. 

Warm ups are going smoothly. My mind is elsewhere, and my body is left to act on instinct, going through the process of becoming ready for use without a second thought. How many times have I warmed up this way? How many games have I played? The ball is almost alien beneath my fingertips. How many hours have I practiced? How many injuries have I sustained? Basketball is tiring physically, yes, but I think it wears on you mentally much more. This game is playing with my heartstrings, and we haven't even started yet. 

My warm up is going too smoothly. Everything is as it should be. I work best under pressure like this. Without stress, I can't reach my full potential. In this game, I'm more of a doer than a thinker. I don't have the time to think of a strategy like Seijuurou or Satsuki, but I'm pretty good at following orders. I'm best at making split-second decisions, at turning my plans completely around at the drop of a hat. I'm not good with the future. I'm on the court for here and  _now_. 

It's too soon for the game to start. It's a thousand years too soon, yet here I am, on the court, slipping on my game face and getting everything buckled down. My calm is coming back. My head is fully screwed on. I will observe and assess. I will use my Zone. I will work harder than anyone on this team to assure us of victory. 

What is Imayoshi doing, riling Seirin up like this? He wants them to go easy on us? My blood is just about to start boiling, but I can see from the way that Seirin is tensing that they'll be going all-out from the get-go. My hopes are starting to soar. Maybe Satsuki was wrong. Maybe they'll be a four-pin problem. Maybe I'll finally hit a six-pin problem. Maybe I'll struggle for a while. 

It's a given, and it always has been, that the ball will reach my hands. It's usually fine by me. I play to win. I live to play. What I'm not okay with is the look that crosses Tetsuya's face, that one that's always tugged at the feelings I stifle, and the way Kagami's eyes are widening. I know from experience that his confidence will be gone by the end of the game. The finishing blow will be Daiki's arrival. I'm just the kid responsible for all the prep work. I'm the enabler. I'm on Set Up Duty. 

I dart past the redhead. I feel swifter today. Swifter, stronger, smoother. Stopping me isn't something that Kagami is capable of, and I feel my expectations of four-pin dropping to two-pin. I want to win. I want to go all out. I want to watch Seirin fight me tooth and nail. 

My jumps are higher than usual as I pass to Sakurai. I don't want to shoot just yet. I'll deny myself that for the time being. At the moment, it's my job to wear the others out. It isn't a difficult job. I'm used to playing so hard that I faint, and it has happened before, but this isn't a game that will require that sort of effort. I just need to set the stage. I'm not the main actor. 

It takes us ten points for Sakurai to pass to me once he's been screened. My movements are more fluid than usual. I buy us another three points from the half line. I don't like playing like this. It isn't bad, that's not my complaint. I just can't stand the caution in Tetsu's eyes, or the way that Kagami screens me so helplessly. I'm easy to catch, easy to block, easy to break. Why hasn't anyone done that yet? "Hai, can't you play a little more seriously?" Imayoshi says as he catches up to me. My body goes rigid for a moment as I stare at him. 

"You want me to use the Zone or something? I'm being perfectly serious." I reply icily. The black-haired captain looks at me with calculating, narrowed eyes. 

"You can't take this seriously, can you? You can't give it your all. Momoi-san was right. Maybe we should take you off the court." My blood is going to boil. My hands are itching to clamp around his throat in what I can only describe as murderous intent flows through every cell in my body. My heart slows, calms. _Fine_. If he wants me to use the Zone from the start, if he wants to watch the expression of my best friend crumble, if he wants to see my rival redhead lose confidence, I'll give it to him. That's the type of player I am. Once I step onto the court, everything outside the game is no longer relevant. Sei drilled that one into my head until I could vomit the words on demand. 

I can only hope that neither Kagami nor Tetsuya will tell me anything. I can't stand to hear their voices, and I can't allow them to offer me any words. My willpower won't tolerate anything shaking its foundations. If my team captain asks something of me, it's my duty to fulfill his request. Otherwise, what good am I? Players like me are only meant to serve, and nothing more. Doing things like this should be second nature; they should be done without argument, so why can I feel my chest growing empty and numb? It's no use. I'll do this for my team. That's the type of player I am. 

Everything, faces, friends, memories, become irrelevant and blank as the Zone begins to surge forward into my limbs. I'll dip into this ocean of focus without hesitation. These are waters I know how to swim. All that matters now is the ball in my hands, and the redhead that hasn't tasted this sort of power before. How I'd love to force him into the Zone! How great it would be to taste competition from someone like him... But these are things I can't have. All I need is victory. Victory will assure me that I'm alive and well and useful. 

How much time has passed? How many times have I received passes? Dodged screens? Seen blue and red eyes drill holes into me? It's all irrelevant, unnecessary, unwanted, unwarranted. Nobody can blame me for seeking the taste of a win. I'm doing what is asked of me without complaint, so Imayoshi should be satisfied, even if Satsuki will lecture me later until my ears bleed. I'm prepared for that. Everything I do, every thought, step, breath, is for this team. Daiki's arrival can wait a while longer. For now, for this half, I am all that is necessary. He isn't needed while I set things up. I am the stagehand that prepares everything for the lead role. I am the understudy. I am the ghostwriter for the famous novelist. I am the puppet played by the puppet master. All they need to do is tug on my strings, and I'll dance. 

I know that if I go past the allotted time without the two-minute break, I'll be forced to slow. I can't afford to slow, no, not this time. I have to play my part without fail. I can Ankle Break as well as Sei can, but it isn't necessary for competition like this. I will dance around them like smoke between their fingers. I am nothing and everything. I feel like some sort of demon, playing around like this, but who are they to judge me? Tetsuya will understand why I have to do this. Kagami will see that he should've played with me more often. I have to warm them up so that Seirin will be in prime condition for Daiki. I have to make sure that they're all ready to go, ready to play, and taking this as seriously as possible. 

I can't even remember who's on the court and who's off. They all look the same to me. They would, at least, if it weren't for Tetsu's bright hair, and his tenacious will. I admire that in him. It's my favorite thing to see. I will never tire of eyes like his. 

The first quarter passes far too soon, and the second quarter is too blurry for me to focus on anything worthwhile. All that matters is that I can go all out, and that I can find some sort of comfort in the knowledge that I've done my role to the best of my ability. Seijuurou would be pleased with my progress, I think. In the end, it doesn't matter. My allotted time is running thin, and the break was too short for me to find my tape. My body is screaming for this next five minutes to pass. 

Four have shrieked by me when the bluenette makes his appearance. I'm half disappointed, half satisfied. I've done my job to the best of my ability, and Seirin is now ready to see Daiki in action. As we trade places without a word, I pretend not to notice the look in Daiki's eyes that scream a thousand questions. All I can do is watch my work unfold. 


	33. Chapter Thirty-Three

My favorite things to watch are my former teammates. I don't know why, but the way they play has never been paralleled by any other athlete I've seen. There is nothing that speaks to me more. Somehow, though, with this game, all I want to do is look away. To see Tetsuya, Daiki, and Kagami all pushing themselves is going to destroy what remains of my heart. I don't know why this game in particular is so painful, but I just want to stop it. I can't bare to watch something like this. The scoreboard speaks for itself. Seirin will fold beneath the foundations I have set. There is nothing more to do. 

I'm glad that I'm off the court, and although it'll never show, Daiki was able to tell the moment we made eye contact. There's something off, though. Something isn't right. My eyes aren't focusing properly. My body is late to move, slow to react, and my mind is too hazy to allow me to comprehend what I'm seeing. I'm starting to regret taking on two sports at once, but there's nothing I can say to complain. It was my decision, after all. There's nothing wrong with feeling tired, right? 

My breathing hasn't returned to normal yet, but I have ceased to sweat. It's more than possible that I can just sleep this off and everything will return to normal. I just have to make sure that nobody notices anything. 

It feels like I'm fighting to control myself. There's a part of me that's about to fly back into the game regardless of the rules, and there's a part of me trying to claw my way out of the Zone. Everything comes into focus within a few seconds.  _I'm stuck. I'm stuck in the Zone._ What can I do to escape this? I thought I knew these waters well, but could it be that I've forgotten how to swim them?

Satsuki is the first to notice that things on my end have gone awry. All I want is the feel of a basketball beneath my fingertips, and the swish of the net to follow my every throw. It's far too much to ask, but it's all that I want. I hope that Seijuurou won't know of this, and that Tetsuya, bless that kid, won't notice. At Teiko, when this happened, he was one of the only people to tug me free. My chest constricts once more. 

The third quarter is done fairly quickly, although it seems to be paining Seirin. I feel for them. This game is paining me, too, in multiple ways. "Oi, Alex." Daiki says, his hand tugging at my ponytail. "You've been staring at the same spot for the entire third quarter." How has someone as obtuse as this blue-haired wonder noticed something like that? I nod wordlessly and hope that he doesn't think of anything else to say. I don't have the heart to pull myself together. For all my talk of willpower, of effort over talent, I have nothing to back it up when I need it. I am a hypocrite, after all. Disappointment taints my blood blue.

"Hai-chan, we'll put you back in." What is Satsuki doing, telling me something like this? Doesn't she know that Seirin will splinter and shatter like broken glass if Daiki and I both play? Doesn't she know that I can't stand to see defeat in other people's eyes? I hate competition. 

It takes a few moments to push myself off the bench. The Zone is starting to drag me down to depths unknown. The throbbing of my heart does nothing but push me deeper to where emotions no longer exist. I am nothing but a player to push around, so tell me what to do, and I'll do it. Consequences no longer matter. If this is what it takes to win, then I'll have to do it. The sooner this game ends, the faster it passes, then the better off I am. I just need to wear myself out of the Zone and back into normal play. 

Why am I cursed with a Zone like this? It always lasts too long, likely from running for seven inning games. I can't break free until the game is over. I'll just have to get this over with as quickly as possible. 

I still can't tell who is playing and who is not. The only things I recognize are jerseys. Black jerseys are ones I stay closer to, and white jerseys I do nothing but pass. The ball is less alien now. I know it better than the back of my own hand. I just hope that I'll wear out soon, that this Zone will pass and I'll just sleep off the rest of the game in a pleasant, dreamless state. I want rest. Cut me some slack, ya know? My insides feel like they're being crushed. 

All seems to be fine until a shrieking pain begins to run up the side of my leg. Will the Zone refuse to relinquish me even in this state? I can play through pain, but it doesn't make anything any better. If anything, I'm more likely to lose my temper. It's my job to keep silent, though. There's no need for me to say anything. Not yet. Not now. I need to ride this out and endure until things sort themselves out. 

I'm so close, so very close to grasping normal play, when the shrieking starts to dissolve. I think it's a good thing. I hope that it's a good thing. I have no indication either way what's going on, but I have no complaints so far. Things go too far suddenly. I'm jumping, competing with that oh so familiar redhead, when things fall apart. My landing is shaky. My leg can no longer bear the weight of my body, and the strain of running is too much. It falls beneath me, unsavory and badly timed like it always is. Sei's going to be furious with me. 

There's a low running whimper escaping my clenched teeth. I can't get up from my half-kneeling position. Why is it that even with my brace I fall victim to my own body? Normal play is back. The Zone is gone, and I can recognize Tetsuya trying to tell me something important. I'm crap at reading lips, but he's close and saying it softly as he helps me up. My eyes widen, my lips part, and I reply in turn, quiet and hopefully undetected. "Hai-chan!" Satsuki says as the ref calls a time-out. "Are you okay?" 

I tug my lips into the most convincing smile I can offer. "Of course. Give me the second one and it'll be fine." Does Satsuki know that I'm slowly destroying myself? Does she know that I don't know how to stop? It's probably a no since she hurries to hand me my second brace. I won't last much longer in this game, but I'm happy that we're at least halfway through the fourth quarter. 

My play style is flexible. Daiki is back on the court, and I'm resorting to mimicking Tetsu's misdirection. I can't be invisible, that's for sure, but I can pass parts of it onto Daiki by capturing the others' attention. It's easy. All I need to do is keep up and everything will be fine. 

In the back of my mind, I wonder why I'm still on the court. What do I have to gain from this? But I can't let him down. No, I definitely can't let him down. It's a basic part of my personality to seek to please others. I'm fine with the way things are. Four minutes and I will be free of this game. It's a burden on my heartstrings. I'm ready. 

Four minutes screamed past me earlier, but these ones pass with all the slowness of molasses. I can't help but wish it would hurry on up and give me a break. When we are down to thirty seconds, things are starting to become unbearable. I can't stand the expressions I'm seeing. I can't see defeat like this. If I'm here too much longer, I'm going to give up. I'm not as enduring as I wish I was. 

I'm happy, much too happy, when the game ceases. It's another disappointment for Daiki, I'm sure, and Satsuki can't be all too pleased, but I have no complaints. I wish others didn't give up as easily as they do. Of course, and I mean this in the nicest possible way, Daiki does something stupid. Not normal stupid. Not even weird stupid. He does something so repulsive that I can't help but want to slap him. It's not at the end of the game that he does it, per se, but rather that I only recognized what he said previously now. 

Before the ref has a chance to overhear us, I glare at Daiki. "If you ever talk to Tetsuya that way again, you can get the hell away from me." I hiss furiously, ignoring the widening eyes before me. "I don't want anything to do with a person who says something as condescending, rude, and insensitive as  _that_. Anyone can win with enough effort. Don't ever let me hear you say something like that again." 

The bluenette's eyes are wide, shocked. I haven't lost my temper in a long time, but hearing someone say something like  _your basketball can never defeat me_ to someone who has worked their ass off for the past few years should count as a crime against humanity. Who cares if I'm taking it too far? Who cares if I'm standing up for the other team? I was never a Miracle. I was never able to adopt their mindset. In my eyes, if someone gives their all, then they win. They can always win. It's just a matter of who wants it more. Talent bows to effort over time. I consider that to be the truth of this world. 

We part, Seirin and Touou. What they do now is up to them. We have more games in the next few days. It'll be a challenge to play Atsushi, but it isn't impossible. That one we can win with enough effort. My greatest concern, however, is the game with Rakuzan that's sure to follow. It wouldn't be of benefit to play against Sei, especially with his eyes. Knowing him, he'll have the three of us sit out just so that Winter Cup is that much more interesting. 

The locker room we've been assigned is filled with the cheerful non-starters are joking around, getting their things out of the lockers so we can pack up and leave. Daiki and I have things to discuss, I suppose. I can't stand to leave things the way they are. I hate yelling and fighting and conflict. I hope it passes soon. Fights are normal, right? Yeah, fights are normal. I'm about to ask Daiki something when my blood runs cold.  _"_ Who said that?" I hiss as Daiki snarls a "Shut up!" 

Somebody collides with the lockers, a face I don't recognize. It's all I can do to keep myself as far from this boy... no this  _child_ as possible.  _Anyone who looks down on Kuroko Tetsuya is in for a bad night._ My chest is tight with anger, my hands are curling into fists, and my lips are straightening into a thin line. Who is a player who did nothing but sit on the bench to look down upon someone who gave a basketball game their all? What could a benchwarmer possibly say? They have  _no right_ to judge a player while they cannot stand on the court. I can't help but approve of Daiki's actions, of the words he snarls, as I turn around and grab my jacket. I've long lost any sympathy for people who look down on others. I have no respect for anyone who fails to recognize the efforts of others. 

"Daiki, let's go." I say after slipping on my jacket and pulling my things together. "I don't want to stay." 

"Ha?" The blue-haired wonder gives me a look of incredulous surprise. 

"Don't wanna go? Stay. I'm leaving." I reply, grabbing my backpack. "See you." 

"Eh? Hai-chan, we haven't-" I give the pink-haired manager a chilly glance. 

"I'm done. See you. I'm leaving." I reply frostily. My ankles hurt. My chest feels like someone's ripped into it. My thoughts are dizzy and disillusioned. I have nothing left here today. I'll come back tomorrow in time for the game and do my best, like I always do. 

I don't mean to pick a fight with Touou, with Imayoshi and Satsuki and Coach Harasawa, but I've had enough. Some part of me feels dead and numb, like I've lost something on the court and I can never hope to regain it.  _My heart is breaking._ There are words that can flow past my lips. There is liquid willing to express all the things I cannot, but who am I, a victor, to cry? I don't have the right to feel this way. I should feel good, accomplished, happy that I've won, so why do I feel like I'm dying? Why do I feel like I've lost? Something's amiss. 

This, this feeling, this reaction, is why Seijuurou told me not to play. Maybe he really did only have my best interests in mind from the start. I owe him an apology for going against his will. I owe him an apology for not believing in him, for second-guessing his judgment. Seijuurou is always right. 

I can feel my stomach knot and my heart drop into the soles of my shoes. I stop about a foot in front of him, hands stuffed into my pockets, nearly succumbing to the urge to avoid all eye contact with the red and gold eyed captain. It's time for me to concede to him. "You were right." The words hardly make it past my lips. I can feel my eyes burning furiously. "I shouldn't have doubted you." 

Seijuurou is infamous for being ruthless and cruel, but what you can never know is just how great a captain he is until you play under him. Follow his will and you're in for the best captain you've ever seen. I know from experience. Trust me on this: of all my captains, regardless of sport, he's been the best I can name. I have absolute faith in his abilities. He always keeps his word. 

Sei, for all his coldness, doesn't rub salt into an open wound. He just steps forward, closer than I would usually allow for just about anyone, and embraces me. Is it that obvious that my emotions are going to explode? That I'm just about ready to cry my eyes out? Seijuurou provides me with all the shield I need to allow my heart to empty itself completely. 

I'm lucky in that I'm a silent crier. I don't know how or when I picked it up, but it's been very useful over the years. I can feel Sei's fingers firm against the back of my neck, the way his arm is curled around my waist. I'm short enough to hide my face in his shoulder and know that nobody will see.  _I wish this was Daiki, and not Sei..._

After a few minutes, I pull away, wiping my face quickly and trying to rid any evidence of emotion from my face. It's quick, but sloppy work with nobody in sight and no mirror to reference, but the job gets done. "I'll see that you play Yosen." Seijuurou says as I drag my gaze back up to his. "You should've played for  _me_ , Alex. Seirin would've been a waste of your abilities, and Touou isn't worthy. Why don't you come to Rakuzan to play for me?" 

No matter how tempting the redhead always makes his offers, this is one I can't accept. "I'm fine where I am, Sei." I reply calmly. "Touou is convenient and comfortable. There's no reason for me to change schools. That aside, Touou is where Daiki is, so..." I'm not the type to be easily swayed, but honestly, Rakuzan isn't looking half bad. 

Forget the moving and look at what the school can offer me, and it isn't a bad choice, but that isn't what I want. It might be what seems like it's best for me, to play under Sei again and to go to such a great school, but I've chosen otherwise. "I'll be staying at Touou." My voice has gained confidence and ground, with enough force to actually cross the distance between Seijuurou and I. I need to remember that my captain is Imayoshi, and my teammates are Sakurai, Daiki, Wakamatsu, Susa, and my manager is Satsuki, and my coach goes by the name Harasawa. I'm not the same person I once was. I don't need Seijuurou to survive. He's no longer my oxygen. He might be the floaties that keep me from drowning, but Daiki is the pool I've chosen to drown myself in. 

"Oi, Alex." I can hear Daiki's footsteps from down the hall, and I'd recognize them anywhere. I've been around him long enough to know where he is just by the way he moves. Blue hair comes into view, and if that's not concern I see in his eyes, then I don't know what to call it. Deep blue is staring into me, drilling holes into me, consuming me. I made the right choice in trusting myself to Daiki. 

A smile is struggling to reach my lips even though my eyes are watering once more. "Let's get going, Alex. We're getting popsicles." I raise an eyebrow at the bluenette's statement.

"Why?" I ask, tilting my head slightly in curiosity. He rubs the back of his neck and lets out a slight sigh, shifting his weight before meeting my eyes. 

"My treat, okay? No reason in particular." He says with irritation. "C'mon, Alex." As the bluenette grabs my hand and leads me away, as I turn my back on Seijuurou, I find a smile coming onto my face. "What're you smiling about? You're practically about to cry." Daiki mutters, tightening his grip on my hand. I shake my head. 

"Nothing." I say with a half-grin. "I just realized that I made a good decision."


	34. Chapter Thirty-Four

There's something that I need to get off of my chest. I don't really know what it is, but I can feel guilt eating away at me like acid. Gnawing and gnawing until it reaches my core, the guilt won't stop no matter what I do. Did I do something I shouldn't have? I can't recall, and it's starting to stress me. My temper is getting shorter, and those little moments when I'm about to lose my temper are only adding to the weight on my shoulders. I'm practically pulling out my hair in an effort to figure out what it is that I've done wrong. Have I bitten off more than I can chew?

I don't have time to be thinking about this. I have basketball again this afternoon, but now, for the morning, I have softball. I can't afford to be distracted. The day is already threatening to be hot, especially with catcher's gear on, and it's only eight or so. We can fit in two games, I think, before I need to go and then come back for our third game.

The clay beneath my cleats is familiar and warm. The dust that rises is earthier than what I'm used to, but pleasant in some strange way. I sigh and continue warming up our pitcher. She's a tall girl, taller than me, and slightly bigger, too, with long black hair and warm eyes. On the field, though, her eyes turn calculating. She's smart enough to not shake off my signs, and I know that if she does, it'll probably be because she knows the batter better than I do, despite the hours I devoted to watching previous games all week. In the end, we'll get along fine. She doesn't have any confidence issues I can name, but she won't use her rise ball in a game. It's got good height and she has excellent control, but I guess she isn't comfortable with it yet. I'm working on it.

I won't fail to call the right pitches, but there's one thing that's been bugging me since the beginning of the game. The utter silence of the other team is unnerving and unnatural. I get that it's disheartening to be hitless and have nothing but errors, but they aren't all that far behind. Okay, maybe I've exaggerated the difference in the score, but they still have hope. There's a lot of game left, plenty for them to take back what they've lost. Why are they so silent?

I call the next pitch, a drop, when both the pitcher and I realize the ball's going straight for the dirt. Runner on three and no outs? This is _bad_. I can't allow the run in as the ball gets into my glove. Something's wrong. Have we hit this batter? This runner? Cleats aim straight for my chest as I crouch down and do what I do best. After all, I know how to take a beating better than anyone I know.

I hate metal cleats. Always have. The spikes drag down the front of my chest protector and allow another inch of metal to claw at my chest. I take it in silence, ball firmly in my glove as I keep the runner several inches away from the plate. It isn't a close call at all. She's out, I'm aching, my pitcher is calm. Have they seen me play in games before Touou? It's nothing I'm not used to, but I can't dodge the concerned gazes directed my way. Bruises are a natural part of how I play.

By the time the game is over, I have so many new bruises, scraps, and cuts that I'm practically an entire injury. Coach Wantanabe has me take the time to clean them out, even if putting band-aids on them will only hinder me, and has the bleeding stop. We win, as predicted. Nobody has any complaints, so I must be doing my job pretty well.

The second game in this tournament of three is going to be more difficult than the first. The pitcher is tired, my outfielders are looking a bit slow, and the aching of my chest hasn't died down quite yet. We need to get fired up, we need to win, and I have to get anything that comes my way. It's okay the way things are, but only for these first few moments. It can't continue on past that, no matter how difficult it is to regain all the energy we've lost. I can feel a headache forming at the thought of another game and another Interhigh match. It'll be fine as long as I can continue on this way. I always have, and there's no reason to doubt my abilities now of all times. I'm carrying the weight of the wins we're wishing for.

The heat is starting to get to me, I think. The umpire has been nice enough to allow the catchers time between outs to cool by getting sprayed with water. It's a little disgusting to be so muddy at this point, but hey, I'm not going to complain. The heat is sweltering, and I need all the cool I can get.

The water is cool and calm as one of the girls on the bench dumps a bucket over my head, dousing the inside of my mask and most of my uniform, which is an unfortunate black. The red socks are a nice touch, along with the red stripe down the side of the pants and jersey. It's a nice looking uniform, but it's going to give me heatstroke.

I shove my hair out of the way as I glance back at the field. I need another out. That's all I need for this inning, and we can get into the dugout, where my pitcher and cool off a little bit and my fielders won't pass out from all the heat the sun's hammering them with. I need to save them for our third game, so they can have some downtime to rest and regain anything they've lost during the day so far. Meanwhile, I think I'm going to be roasted. I'll have to sleep until the basketball game starts. Luckily, and I suppose it's _luckily_ , Satsuki's parents are giving me a ride. I definitely need one.

The mask comes back on, and the game resumes as quickly as it was paused. One more out. Unfortunately, I know that our pitcher is too worn to get us this out. I sign for a ball in the dirt, watching as this batter goes for it, and watch as she takes off for the drop-third. The ball rockets from my hands toward the first baseman, who is luckily still alive, and makes it safely into her glove. I can't help but feel satisfied with the turn of events. Coach Wantanabe ushers us off the field to get a drink and start batting.

My at-bats today are nothing to complain about. A few singles, a double, and a triple. I'm more than happy with them, although we could use something a little more substantial. From the looks of things, we need it _bad_ since our pitcher will be switched out. I have no choice but to go for something that will fire us all up. At least, that's my plan up until I see something I can't avoid.

I have to give them credit. That pitcher has impressive control. However, if they wanted to walk me, surely they could've found a way other than to toss a ball straight into my elbow? Especially a fastball? White-hot pain races up my arm. I'm trying my best to keep the tears forming in my eyes from spilling as I hand my bat over to the next girl up.

This is not good, no this is really bad. I can feel my fingers tingling and my shoulder trying to throb. It'll look bad for the pitcher and catcher on the opposing team to have pegged me, but right now that isn't the issue. My arm is killing me as I jog to first. "Time!" The umpire calls as I step on the bag, ready to run again. I won't get the chance it seems. I get a courtesy runner and an icepack strapped securely to my elbow until it's time for me to catch again.

"Are you absolutely sure you can catch?" Coach asks as I rifle through my bag. I nod my head and look for a compression sleeve, which seems to have up and left me.

"Positive. I can do it." I say firmly, glancing up at him. "I can play right handed if it gets bad. It feels better now."

He looks at me dubiously, but he doesn't question me. If I pride myself on anything, and I probably pride myself on many things, it's my ability to endure. I can endure this. It isn't so bad. Besides, I still have two games to attend, to participate in if needed. I'm not going to let one pitch ruin my plays for the rest of the day.

Most of the rest of the game goes by with remarkable speed, with the most memorable moments being our second baseman's homerun and an astounding catch by our centerfielder. We win, and it's time for me to go. "Is there room for my bag in your car?" I ask Satsuki's father as I grab my clothes. "If there isn't, I can probably leave it with the team." Mr. Momoi nods his head empathetically.

"We have room for it. Are you changing here?" I shake my head and quickly part with my team, promising to return for the third game and reminding our pitchers to get their arms iced if they're hurting. The car ride is mostly silent. Satsuki must be helping strategize at the courts already, and we'll be picking up Daiki somewhere, so I'm sitting in the backseat, dozing off against the window.

The only thing that disturbs my sleep is the opening of the door opposite mine and the depression of the seat as someone, most likely Daiki, comes to sit in the backseat. I guess this is Satsuki's way of assuring herself that Daiki wll actually come to the game rather than go off to an arcade and presumably drag me off with him. I think she should have more faith in him, but that's her thing.

We get to the Interhigh courts all too fast, and although the heat is nothing short of torturous outside, it's cool and brisk inside, just nice enough to shake sleep from my shoulders and allow me to leave it outside. It doesn't make much difference to my elbow. It's long gone numb from continual application of the dripping cold pack, but I've regained movement in my lower arm. It sees that I'll get away with just a bruise and there's no break to be had. Relief fills my chest.

My softball uniform looks out of place here among the spectators and players. It almost serves as a reminder that I no longer fit in with whom I thought were my peers. I can never hope to pursue basketball outside of high school. I just don't have the height necessary to properly play among others, although I'm sure there have been players shorter than I. It's no use either way. Nobody picks up players my size anymore. At this point, I'm more likely to burn out than to be able to pursue anything.

"Hai-chan! What happened to you?" Satsuki practically shrieks as I enter the locker room. "I thought you promised no more injuries!" I blink my eyes owlishly.

"I couldn't help it. The pitcher hit me. It doesn't hurt anymore, so don't worry about it. The ice pack was just a precaution." I reply, shedding my softball uniform. "I have to leave right after the game to get back to the other one. Don't-" The pinkette practically has a heart attack when she sees all my new bruises. "Don't worry about it! They don't hurt! I can play!"

I'm just about to start donning my basketball jersey when Sakurai and Imayoshi poke their heads in. At first, I have no idea how to react. Do I scream? Do I yell? Do I ignore them? I can't actually decide, so Satsuki does the action for me. She shrieks and pushes the boys out, yelling at me to get dressed and be careful before following my teammates. I feel tightness in my chest.

I'll admit that the bruises look bad with black and blue blooming all across my skin. I'll admit that they're tender and that parts of me are threatening to swell, but I'll deny any part of me that says they hurt. Yes, they ache and they're sore, but they aren't _pain_ -pain. I have nothing to fear. I can go all out, and then the last game of the day will go smoothly. I _can_ do this. I can endure.

It takes me longer than usual to get my uniform on, but I'm out in a little over five minutes, and I'm warming up with the others. They seem a little gentler today, careful not to bump into me. Nobody makes any unnecessary contact with me. It's an enormous change from my previous two games, but I'm not exactly complaining. I'm about ready to pass out regardless of how much I slept, and my body is sore in places I've forgotten existed. My movements are smooth, but tired, and I hope that Satsuki has some sort of way to keep me charged, because otherwise I'll just be useless.

Weariness is eating away at my bones, making me feel liquid. It's fine. As long as I don't use the Zone in this game, I'll still have some left for what's after this. I know I'm supposed to be giving this my all, but frankly, that isn't possible. More than one game means that my energies are all divided for each game. I spent too much in the last game, and sleeping hasn't helped much. An energy drink will make me crash later, and sugar is never an answer. The main concern on my mind, however, is how incredibly sore I'm going to be tomorrow.

The game starts, thankfully, without a hitch. Satsuki is giving me the first half to sleep and get myself pieced back together properly, and I'm grateful toward her for that. The problem is that I can't sleep near the court, or I'll want to play. Plus, it just looks bad in general, so I'm banished to the locker room, where the benches are slightly colder and much more uncomfortable. Cologne taints the air in an effort to mask the sweat of previous teams. It doesn't work.

I'll admit that I slept like a log. Like a baby. Like the dead. Once I go into energy saving mode, you'd practically have to scream into my ear to get me to stir. I need all the energy I can get, and I doubt that Satsuki will blame me for getting at least twenty minutes of sleep. Naptime is much appreciated by the time one gets to high school.

I'm extremely slow to wake once Satsuki comes in to harass me. I don't really mind, but my thoughts are foggy and my movements are equally slow. It'll wear off in a bit, but I can feel stiffness clambering up my neck and crawling down my spine. I'll need to warm myself up a bit with what's left of the break period. It doesn't take long, as usual, but it's still necessary to make sure I don't injure myself. My newly acquired bruises don't need any more companions.

I don't know this team. The one we're facing, I mean. I don't really recognize any of the colors, and I don't particularly care for them, either. It's not like I have anything against them, the colors green and white, but some colors are best left away from sportswear. Baby barf green is one of them.

"Are you ready?" Satsuki's voice rises in its chime-like manner as she tilts her head, fingers threaded together. I give a nod, stretching out my limbs once more before I get subbed in for the normally benched player.

"As ready as I'll ever get." I reply fluidly. My fingers feel fine as I wiggle them around, and my elbow's collision with the softball feels like it happened in another life. I have no complaints. I just hope that nothing cramps on-court, so I can play as I usually do. It won't be difficult.

I'm lucky in that I don't cramp, or get any sorer than before I played, but half a game still feels like an incredibly long amount of time. I can't wait for my last game to be over so that I can go home and sleep. I'm not surprised that Daiki wasn't attending this game, as he usually chooses not to do, but I'm a little irritated as his usual absentness. I like being on the same team as him, but his behavior isn't something I'm responsible for correcting.

I do my best to grow our lead in the third quarter so that I have a hope of napping for the fourth, and thankfully, my wish comes true. I sleep long enough to grow stiff and know I'll have to warm up once more for the softball game to follow.

What is unsurprising is the result of our last, my final game for today. Yes, I've gotten another dozen bruises. Yes, I'm sore in places that I now know exist. But what's most surprising is that I found a familiar pair of eyes assessing me once more, and although it wasn't unpleasant, it certainly wasn't entirely welcome. They did leave before the end of the game, around the sixth inning, but by then our fate was sealed. What did surprise me, and it surprised me in the best way possible, was the attendance of a certain blue-haired boy who'd never bothered to come before.


	35. Chapter Thirty-Five

_The boys and I wait for someone to offer to go get some Pocari. Satsuki offered to go get some, but she has yet to return. It makes me anxious to know she hasn't returned yet, but Daiki insists that the pinkette is simply slow. My gut says otherwise. "I'm going to check on Satsuki." I say after another five minutes have passed. Sei nods to show he's heard me._

_The hallway is bright, but the darkness past it on either side shows that we've practiced well past sunset. Tetsuya's mom had asked us to try and get home earlier than now, but I guess we can't help but disappoint her today. "Satsuki!" I call, walking toward the vending machine. "Satsuki?"_

_Pink hair comes into view just as pain explodes across the back of my head. "Ah-" I can faintly see the pink-haired beauty run toward me. Then I see her run out of sight. I hope she's getting help._

_My skin crawls as hands grab all across my clothes. Are they searching for something? I want to scream, to make some sort of noise, but I can't do anything but stare dazedly at whoever stands before me. "Hanamiya, we're going to be expelled if she tells anyone." Is that Haizaki? What did I do to deserve this? I can't even bring my fingers to twitch or my voice to leak out. I stay limp as someone holds the back of my shirt. Something hot runs down my neck._

_"She won't tell anyone." Hanamiya's voice is confident and cruel. His eyes don't look human. "She can't even cry." I'm so scared that noise now seems impossible. I want to cry. "Let's have some fun, okay, Alex-chan?" Why can't I run? Why can't I scream? "Stay quiet for us, okay?"_

_Pain is blooming up and down my leg as my ankle twists and bends. My shoulder feels like it's going to tear from my body. I don't want this. "Everyone is trash once you break them." My eyes are starting to water. The pain is getting unbearable. I can't stand this. My body finally reacts and jerks from Haizaki's hands. It doesn't free me from his grip, and makes my head spin. One of them smacks my head again, harder._

_Someone, anyone, come help me! My heart is racing and my body feels like a lead weight. I keep murmuring something, but I can't hear what it is. "I told you to stay quiet." Nothing is in focus anymore. My heart is sinking. I feel like throwing up._

_"Hai-chan!" I jerk hard at the sound of my name, only to feel something tear. Pain shocks me; I draw in a harsh breath. "Hai-chan!"_

_"Alex!" For once, I gain momentary control as I surge forward. I can't remember what happens next. Everything is a blur in which Hanamiya and Haizaki never cease to terrify me. It takes me another ten minutes to form a coherent thought._

_"Alex!" I manage a scream. It's short, harsh, terrified, and pain-filled. It earns me a punch to the gut, but the door to whatever shed this is slams open in a matter of seconds. The floor rushes to meet me as Haizaki drops me and runs. Hanamiya is who knows where, but I'm just glad that he's far away from me._

_I start crying as soon as the light reaches me eyes. My hands are shaking as I cover my face and I draw my knees back up to my chest. "No more." I whimper. "I won't say anything."_

_"Alex!" Cold eyes are staring deep into me. Green and gray and no more!_

_"I won't say anything, so stop." I whisper. "Leave me alone. I didn't do anything to you!"_

_No, no, how could I confuse those two with these five? I want to go home, but I can't move. My body is done. I guess it thinks it's done its duty. It goes limp and lax as tears stream from my eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"_

_"Hai-chan..."_

"Alex! It's just a dream, Alex..." I feel warm for some reason. It takes a while for me to swim closer reality.

"Daiki...?" My voice sounds scratchy, like I've been overusing it. "What's wrong, Daiki? Did you have a bad dream?" I feel like I can't move. My body is so sore that even breathing feels painful.

"You were screaming, Alex." The bluenette murmurs. I make some unidentifiable noise. The warmth is now something I can recognize. Daiki's arms are wrapped tightly around me.

"I thought you guys were those two. How did I mix you guys up with Hanamiya and Haizaki?" I loosely wrap my arms around the furnace of a boy. "I'm sorry for mixing you guys up."

"It's fine already." Daiki growls. "I have a different nightmare to take care of and I need your help." I groan as I sit upright.

"What is it?" I murmur. My muscles are screaming in agony, and Daiki sounds completely wound up. "Your...?"

"Yeah." he murmurs. I groan as I try tugging on some proper clothes.

"Here?" The bluenette nods. "How long?"

"A few minutes." I raise an eyebrow. "Didn't hear you." I nod.

"Alright." When I'm properly dressed and all the more sore, but nonetheless presentable, I exit my room.

Sitting on my couch talking anxiously are two people who I never thought I'd see again. Admittedly, my first meeting with them was a few years ago and only for a couple tense minutes. Their eyes latch onto me the moment I'm in view.

"Hello, Mr. and Mrs. Aomine. My name is Alex Heights. Please call me Hai." Daiki's mother has a sweet, but tired face with warm eyes. Daiki's father looks rigid and strict, with a cool, calculating air around him. "Can I help you?"

"You... Daiki has been staying with you?" Mrs. Aomine's voice is pleasant to listen to, but somehow very edgy, like she’s too nervous. I nod my head.

"That's correct." At least they'll be addressing me. Somehow, I handle Daiki's parents better than he does.

"A foreigner?" I do my best to smile brightly.

"Yes, I'm a foreigner." I can sense the looming disapproval. "Let's cut to the chase, please."

"Daiki, it's time to come home." Mr. Aomine has an imposing air that chills the whole of my apartment. "You've had your fun. It's time for you to apologize to your mother and I and come home."

I never did ask what Daiki was fighting about when he left, but from the looks of things, the blue-haired wonder won't be apologizing. Rigid and furious, blue eyes have been replaced with burning coals, and muscles have been wound taunt into a ticking time bomb. I sense a fight, and I hope it doesn't come to pass. "I didn't do anything wrong." Daiki hisses with all the fury imaginable. Surprise almost flits across my face.

"Apologize." Mr. Aomine says again.

"I did nothing wrong!" The bluenette repeats. "Like hell I'm apologizing!" Conflict, all conflict, makes me sick. My stomach is roiling.

"I demand an ap-" The shorter, older, slightly scarier version of Daiki cuts off abruptly as I step in between the two.

"That's enough." Surprise drowns the room. "Daiki says he did nothing wrong, and I believe him. He shouldn't apologize for doing something wrong when he didn't."

Anger is clawing down my back. If I hate anything more than conflict, elbows, and metal cleats, it's being wrongly accused. Nothing feels worse in the world. "So please, of you're going to continue the way you are, get the _hell_ out of my apartment. That isn't welcome here."

"Who do you think you are?" Mrs. Aomine is desperately trying to calm the ball of fury she calls her husband. "You have nothing to do with-"

"Get out of my apartment." I say icily. "You aren't welcome here." A hand connects with my cheek full force. Did Daiki's father always have such an awful temper? It takes all my self-control to stay stock-still. Daiki launches past me faster than I've seen him move in a while. My heart is hammering and my vision is blurring. I've never been good with violence of any kind. I hear the sound of flesh connecting, a bit of yelling, and shoes skidding as the door slams with enough force to nearly shake free of the frame. The lock is turned with lightening speed.

"Are you okay? No, of course you aren't... did you get hurt? Did you-" Daiki holds my face almost too firmly, and I can't see past his head. He asks question after question, but I'm too stunned to answer anything, especially since the blue-haired boy practically doesn't breathe between all the questions he's firing my way. I notice absentmindedly that the he has to bend down for us to see eye-to-eye.

All these questions come to an abrupt halt as I hug the significantly taller boy. For as long as I can remember, when something like that happened there was nobody to stand beside me. Until I met these Miracles, I assumed things like abuse were things that everyone went through alone. I assumed that violence wasn't a big deal. My time here has greatly changed my perspective. "Daiki..." For some reason, his name almost sounds like a prayer. It carries some unimaginable weight.

"Let me take a look at your face." The blue-haired wunderkind murmurs as he pulls away from me. My head is tilted slightly, uncomfortably, so that my offended and overheated cheek is being scrutinized. "There's a full handprint..."

I shrug my shoulders. "You shouldn't have gotten in between us like that, Alex! He slapped you!" Unimaginable fury coats Daiki's tongue and colors his eyes a deeper cobalt blue. "He _touched_ you... I'll kill 'im!"

"It doesn't matter, Daiki. I've had a lot worse. It doesn't really hurt." The last part is nearly a flat out lie, but he doesn't need to know that. "It's fine." Cobalt blue darkens to the deepest indigo I've ever seen.

"It's not okay! He touched you! He hurt you! You practically started crying!" In all my years around Daiki, I've never once seen this side of him. "You're _mine_! Nobody else is allowed to touch you! No one can make you cry! You're _all_ _mine_." This possessiveness is new and surprising, but I'm not against it. Is it possessiveness or protectiveness? I can't really tell the difference, but it feels welcome and warm. "I won't let anyone hurt you. Not again." Two arms wrap around me as tightly as they dare. "Not after Haizaki and Hanamiya. Not after _him_. Not after those bastards you called your family."

My vision is blurry again. Blurry and unfocused as I hide my face in the blue-haired boy's chest. It's taking all my willpower not to cry. Nobody has promised me something in this way before. I don't know how to react. " _Daiki_..."

My voice is horribly uncertain and wavers far too much. My hands are shaking as they latch into the back of his shirt, and my legs are threatening to buckle. "Why would you promise me that? You don't need to do that for me." My voice is threatening to crack.

"You really don't understand anything." Daiki mutters into my hair. "I _love_ you. That's why. That's the only reason I need." I want to gasp. I want to cry. All I can actually do is hold onto the bluenette with all the strength left in my body.

"Daiki..." I can keep myself from crying, if only barely. His embrace is warm and secure and snug. How long has it been since I've felt that nothing bad can happen? How long has it been since I've felt so relaxed? It seems like nothing can go wrong right now. Some sense of security is drowning out everything else. I'm not complaining, not at all. The feeling is welcome and nothing short of a miracle, so I'll enjoy it to the best of my ability. 

_I twist the silver plastic ring around my middle finger as I watch Sei pace back and forth. He actually seems rather anxious in his own way, which I suppose is out of character. I should pay more attention to the feelings of those around me. "Why do you keep getting hurt? Are we not careful? Do you go out of your way to aggravate these two?" His questions sound like barbed accusations, and it takes all my self-control not to stand and start yelling._

_"You are careful, and I don't go out of my way to do anything to anyone." I reply as calmly as is possible in situations like these. The bandages around my head are too tight, and I feel a headache coming on. I still have an unfortunate tendency to blank out and lose my connection with the world when I get too stressed or tired, but the doctor promised us it would pass as I got better._

_"You're not going anywhere without one of us present, is that clear, Alex?" There's an unusual fire lighting up Seijuurou's eyes, one I've never seen before. "I have no desire to see you hurt. Haizaki has crossed the line, and both boys will be dealt with in due time. My greatest concern is the that you won't tell me what happened."_

_The events of two nights ago flashes before my eyes in a terrifying blur. My heart beats double time and my head aches. "I don't remember." I lie, gritting my teeth as my arms move reluctantly to massage my throbbing temples. "I don't remember what happened."_

_"Do you honestly believe that I'm stupid enough to believe a lie like that? Your memory is one of the traits that I found to be exceptional. We both know that you remember what happened. Tell me what happened."  Red and gold eyes are glowing with incredible determination. I have absolutely no desire to bow down to their will._

_"I don't know!" I say. It's a half-truth, to any extent. "I don't know, I promise! My head hurt and then everything hurt and all I remember is that everything hurt and I couldn't move. I don't know what happened! I don't know, I don't know, I don't know!"_

_Red and gold look panicked as I grab my hair and tug violently as tear stream down my face. "I'm sorry! I don't know!" Why am I apologizing? Did I actually do something wrong? Why can't I remember things clearly anymore? I can't see properly and it's all I can do not to scream, and it feels like I can't breathe. What's wrong with me?_

_"Alex... I see. I understand. Don't worry, Alex. It won't happen again." Seijuurou is closer than he used to be. As intimidating as the redhead is, I don't see it. I just see a kid my age who doesn't know what to do when someone starts crying in front of him the way I have. I need to control my emotions. I can't burden this kid anymore than I already have._

"Oi, Alex!" I hum sleepily, prying one eye open slowly. I'm not sure when I feel asleep, but it's obviously inconvenient to both Daiki and I. It takes most of my energy to open my other eye and realize that, for the most part, this position isn't all that uncomfortable. I don't exactly understand where we are, though. 

Have I mentioned that I like piggyback rides? Well I'm sure as hell getting one right now, but why? The air is hot and humid, a little uncomfortable, and not at all as cool as I wish it would be. Summer is an annoying time of year, I guess. I just wish that school would end for vacation already, but it's not something to complain about, I suppose. Something about the value of a high school education and all. 

Where  _are_ we? Some part of downtown Tokyo, I guess. There are huge screens with ads and famous idols attached to skyscrapers. It's almost breathtaking, like the number of people all around us. I slide down so I can walk beside the blue-haired boy. What's annoying, though, about this vast number of human beings is that although it's a sure sign of life, it's a sure sign that I'm going to get lost within the next ten minutes no matter how tall Daiki is. The bluenette problem-solves and grabs my hand. 

Have you ever paid attention to how someone's hand feels when it's grasping your own? How sometimes your palms brush and other times they feel miles apart? How your fingers interlace like puzzle pieces finally fitting together? I like to think I'm not as sappy and sentimental as others would assume, but these are all things I've started to notice more and more since the train ride with the blue-haired wonder. 

I don't really know where we're going, but does it really matter? To me, the most important part of all this is that Daiki is beside me. I guess it's a little strange that the bluenette and I don't really go out on dates, or if we do they aren't all that often, but I think that spending time with someone shouldn't apply only to dates or dating in general. Since we're so close at all hours of the day, things like dates are starting to seem unnecessary, although I'm not going to flat out say that I wouldn't want to go on one with him. 

I look up in time to see that we're heading inside a building I've never seen in my life before. It makes me a little anxious, but it's nothing I'm not open to. Maybe I'm open to a little too much. Either way, any protests I have, any second thoughts I'm about to think, are completely destroyed, erased, eradicated, by what I see next. 

Four stories tall and god knows how wide, I can only hope that this is some sort of mall, because I doubt there's any other name to describe it. "Let's go, Alex." The bluenette says with his usual lack of enthusiasm. I simply laugh and follow him. 


	36. Chapter Thirty-Six

Blond hair comes into view as I slide off my apron. My manager, Ms. Kawada, is out of the office but due back in the next ten minutes. My shift ended maybe ten minutes ago, but I'm more than willing to watch the store until she comes back. I owe her that much for constantly having to miss work and still being employed. She's too kind for her own good, and I can't help but feel that I'm exploiting that.

"Haicchi! I thought you'd be here-ssu!" I look at the blond in surprise.

"Ryouta? How'd you find out I work here?" I say with shock. The blond kind of giggles in his own way, although I suppose it's more of a _laugh_ than a _giggle_.

"I remembered the name of the this place since you always brought sweets for Murasakibaracchi after you got off work, and Aominecchi didn't really know where you were." Ryouta says with his usual model grin. "I wanted to see you-ssu!" I raise an eyebrow suspiciously.

"Somehow that seems slightly creepy, Mr. Kise." I say with all the politeness of a complete stranger. Ryouta pales and gives me the same look a kicked puppy would.

"Haicchi, that's so _cruel_." He says with a childish whine. I raise an eyebrow.

"Really, Mr. Kise? Sorry to have upset you~!" I try to hide the smile that's threatening to tear my deadpan expression apart. Believe me when I say I adore this kid, but he's just too easy to tease. His expressions are top notch.

"You're so mean to me, Haicchi!" Ryouta says as childishly as always. "Ryouta! Call me _Ryouta_ , or at least drop the '-san', okay-ssu?" I can't help but laugh.

"Sorry, Ryouta, it's just that you're so fun to tease." I reply with a grin to Ryouta's still pouting face. "Sorry, sorry. Your reactions are just too precious."

The bubbly blond grins at me. "Anyway-"

"I'm back!" Ms. Kawada chirps as the bell attached to the door chimes like crystals. "Oh, Hai-chan, who is this?" Ms. Kawada is tall, with long hair that reaches her waist, and square bangs. Her eyes, as per usual, are large and curious and alive. Long fingers entangle with each other.

"This is one of my former classmates and teammates, Kise Ryouta." I say cheerily. "He's practically the sweetest human being I've ever met. Ryouta, this is my boss, Ms. Kawada. She always puts up with me." The two bow and exchange greetings.

"Hai-chan, why don't you take some of the things in the back? There's a box already full, so just take one." Ms. Kawada says cheerfully.

"Oh, thanks!" I reply with a smile. I take one of four boxes. "See you!" I don't bother to open the box as I walk out with Ryouta matching me step for step. "Anyway, why'd you come to see me? I don't think anything you have is remotely close to the bakery."

The park comes into view and I, being the child I am, stride for the swing set. It's a little late in the day, and although usually children are still all over this place, there's only a few in sight. I plop down into the swings. The pink box is opened gingerly as Ryouta sits on the swings beside me. "Score! I got cookies and pastries! No cake though. Satsuki will be disappointed. Do you want any, Ryouta?" I offer the blond the box as I munch on the biggest sugar cookie I've seen in my life.

It's the good stuff, too, not that chalky crap we got in the States that had a thousand pounds of whipped fat or frosting or something on top. Ms. Kawada is a fantastic baker, and while I mostly just handle the counter, I'm half decent at doing menial jobs. I'm getting better, though! The cookie is melting in my mouth. Ryouta politely declines my sugared deliciousness since he must keep his "model figure." I laugh in response and take another bite of cookie.

As we sit in the cooling air (thankfully), Ryouta flips open his phone a few times before looking at me directly. "How was your date with Aominecchi?" He asks in a chirpy voice. I choke violently on cookie bits. It takes about two minutes to get everything back to normal before I look at the blond with wide eyes.

"Excuse me?" My voice is higher pitched than usual, with an annoyed tremble and cracking at the end.

"Your date with Aominecchi, Haicchi~! How did it go-ssu?" My face is beyond a thousand shades of read. As the shades progress, Ryouta's grin gets wider and wider. "That well, huh-ssu?" He says with a wink. My face darkens.

"I d-don't know what you're talking about, Mr. Kise." I reply as I look away. "We hung out at the mall and caught a movie." Thoughts of yesterday bring a smile creeping along my lips.

"That's not what Kasamatsu-senpai said when we were behind you-ssu." My head turns so fast that my hair practically whips my face.

"Whaaaat?" My eyes are wide and surprised. "We were in the very back. There weren't any rows behind us!" The blond model grins.

"We were across the aisle and he mentioned it as you exited." My face is turning several darker shades of red. "You didn't pay much attention to that movie, did you-ssu?" I smack the blond roughly and let out a small cry of outrage as my cheeks redden once more.

"Be quiet, Ryouta!" I plead. Honestly, this boy is bad for my heart. My face is nothing short of scorching and I can't decide whether to laugh or cry. "Don't be mean to me." I try to pout my way out of this discussion. The model's having none of it.

"Ne, Haicchi, what was the movie even about, hm? Is Aominecchi a good-"

"Be quiet, Ryouta!" I squeal, placing my hands over the blond's mouth in an effort to stifle the flow of blush-inducing words that drop from his candied tongue. "So what if I didn't pay attention to the movie?"

The blond laughs as he pulls my hands away from his mouth. "See? I knew it-ssu!" My flushed cheeks darken more, something that should now be impossible.

" _Ryouta_ , you're being cruel!" I'm just a whirling mess of embarrassment, and I wonder how anyone can stand be next to someone as embarrassing as I am. "How about we talk about your date with this Kasamatsu person?"

Ryouta's cheeks darken in a very non-Ryouta-like blush. "It was a date!" I reply with wide eyes. "I didn't think I'd gotten that right." It's funny, though. I guess that _interesting_ or _endearing_ would be better words to describe the way the blond's eyes light up at the mention of this Kasamatsu. It brings a smile to the corners of my lips. Ryou's a lot like a puppy, I think. He loves everyone, sometimes too much I think. I'm glad he found someone he likes.

Then the blond evades the question, or rather, the suggestion very sneakily. "I paid more attention to that movie than _you_ did, Haicchi~!" In my new flush of humiliation, I completely forget about Ryou's much more interesting love life as I chase him around the park and threaten him. It goes on far longer than it should for kids our age, but what do I care? Ryou's sunny and bright and fun to be around. Messing with him makes me smile.

"Your loss then~!" I say teasingly. "My distraction was much more fulfilling than yours was, apparently." The blond laughs, a noise that sounds like wind chimes.

"Sure, sure, Haicchi." He says. "I'll walk you home. Aominecchi will probably get worried if you're out too long. I told him I was going to see you." I stick my tongue out.

"Daiki isn't my babysitter, ya know." I reply with a roll of my eyes. "But I guess it would be good to get home. If you don't mind the distance, you're more than welcome to walk with me."

The walk home is filled with brisk, cool breezes, Ryouta's laughter, and a constant stream of chatter that never ceases, even when I stop to get meat buns. He finally takes me up on the offer to eat something when we pass along onto a new street.

The street lights are flickering on one by one as we continue toward my increasingly familiar neighborhood. I'm grateful for Ryou's company, especially because sometimes things get a little shady around here when it's the weekend, and I want no part of it. Normally Daiki would walk me back, especially since my baked goods will still be fresh and he can eat and walk at the same time without any fear of choking. Today I have Ryou, a nice change of pace, and he's in an unusually good mood, even for how cheerful he normally is.

I can't help but feel that Ryouta's cheerful attitude is nothing short of contagious, even if it's at times nearly unbearable. I find myself more chipper and singsong-y than I've been since leaving Teiko for Touou. I'm not complaining, of course, merely stating a fairly well known fact. I'm definitely not the peppiest person around, but I'm definitely not the most negative, either. I'm somewhere in the middle. I guess I'm mostly just neutral.

"How's Kaijou, anyway? It looks like a nice school from the time I went to watch your game." I ask, watching the grinning blond carefully. "The campus was pretty." The blond only grins wider.

"Gonna leave Aominecchi and Momoicchi for me?" He teases. "Kasamatsu-senpai might like you." I roll my eyes.

"Sure, sure, Ryou. It looks like a good fit for you." I reply with a sloppy grin. "I'm happy you found a school you like."

"You should come watch another game, Haicchi! But don't fall asleep this time, okay-ssu?" The blond is giving me the eyes. Not just, you know, a puppy look. It's far more advanced. The Look. The _Eyes_. No matter how hard I try to look away, I can't seem to do it. "Pleeeeeease come watch a game, Haicchi~!"

I groan and look away. "Stop giving me the Look, Ryouta." I say as I try to block the blond's face from view. It's not an expression I can ever say no to, and he knows this very, very well. It's gotten me to do more things than I'll ever be willing to admit. The blond merely moves my hands and amplifies the puppy in his expression.

Enough is enough, I decide, as the urge to squeal and squish the blond's face becomes overwhelming. "Fine, fine! I'll go watch a game, Ryouta! And I won't sleep! Happy?" The Look transforms into what I can only describe as the Afterlook.

The Afterlook is pretty much the only expression I can name that shows nothing but utter joy, and no matter how hard I try to resist it, I find myself smiling right back at him. It's basically useless to resist, but I like to try anyway. "Thanks-ssu!" Ryouta chirps cheerfully. "You don't be disappointed." I offer the blond a half-grin.

"Like you ever disappoint me." I reply. It's true that in the past Ryou and I weren't always the closest of friends, but we got along incredibly well. This kid has never let me down, and his unfailing cheer for what seems like just existing makes everything a little brighter. He's practically a human sunbeam.

The blond chirps with excitement and news of his team as we continue along until reaching my building. "This is where we part ways." I say with a smile. "Unless you want to come in?" I guess it's fairly unusual for me to actually invite others into my apartment since the blond looks surprised.

"Thanks, but no thanks-ssu. I'll text you, okay? See you, Haicchi!" Ryouta waves with his trademark grin before walking back down the way we came toward the nearest train station. Seeing the blond has reminded me that I've neglected my friendship to a particular shadow, and that's not something I'm very comfortable with.

At this point, I kind of wonder if he wants anything to do with me. He looked devastated at the end of the game, and at that moment I'd wanted nothing more than to apologize for playing and curl around the bluenette and make him feel better anyway I can. Don't get me wrong, I'm not touchy-feely, or particularly love-struck, but there isn't anything I wouldn't do for Tetsuya. He's one of my favorite people on the planet. If I made a list, Tetsuya would definitely be the person at the very top.

Not that I'll ever admit to having a list of favorite people. Ever. You can keep a secret, right? I'll trust you with that.

My fingers brush against the doorknob before I enter, still trapped in thought. What if Tetsuya hates me? I'd never be able to live with myself. Despite what he told me during the game, the only words that kept me from asking to be pulled out near the end of the final quarter, I can't help but feel guilt build up, ready to burst like a broken pipe. I wonder how much more of this I can take.

The apartment is dark and somewhat chilled as I walk in. I don't spot Daiki anywhere, so I send him a text to let him know I'm home. He replies that he'll be at the arcade a while longer, but will be home pretty soon. He also plans to pick up some takeout on his way, and promises not to buy anything spicy. I tell him I'll hold him to that, and if he does by some chance buy anything spicy that I just so happen to place into my mouth, he'll be sleeping on the porch. All I get is a snickering emoticon in response.

All I manage to do in the time it takes for Daiki to finish up his game and start walking home is dig myself into an ever-deepening pit of despair. I mean, sure, it isn't my fault that Seirin buckled. Well, I guess it is. Nobody holds up well when I'm the one who undermines his or her foundations. But they chose to keep fighting, and I think that stands for something! I'll admit that their defeat was ugly, and by no standards clean, and I can only hope they'll rile up and get back into the swing of things so I can play them once more, not as the one to undermine them, but as the one they go head to head with. Is it foolish of me to hope for a good game?

All things, however, swivel back to my possible problem with Tetsu. I don't want to lose him as a friend. He's probably been the most positive influence on me, the most helpful in all aspects of my life, and the one of the only people who has never turned their back on me. I really would do anything for that boy.

"Ugh," I groan, rubbing my face as I try to calm myself. "There's really no point in overthinking these things. It's just a game, right? We'll play again, and what happens on the court stays on the court. What happens off the court stays off the court. Tetsuya won't hold it against me."

Somehow, it sounds much more logical and a lot more believable when I say the words aloud. I can feel some of my anxiety fading. All I need to do is talk to him, right? It's a little late for that now, as in time-wise, not that I'm putting this off. Then again, what if he takes my silence as a signal that I don't _want_ to talk to him? Surely he knows me better than that. He knows precisely how socially awkward I am. I decide that I'd better do it now. I'll feel better about it, anyway.

 _Tetsuya, we're still friends, right?_ The words practically glare daggers at me. Do I sound as stupid as I feel? I think I'm being too blunt, but Tetsu is known for his harsh bluntness and he knows I don't like to beat around the bush. My fingers are itching to send the text, but what if he replies with something other than yes? What if he doesn't even want to hear from me?

Before I have a chance to second guess myself and cause unlimited amounts of misery to flood in, my fingers slam into the send button. I watch in mild horror as the message sends, lighting up my screen with a little green check mark.

For the longest time, my phone offers me no solace. I take it off silent, past vibrate, my usual setting, to an easy-to-hear volume that won't deafen me, but also won't slip past me like what happens all too often. I do a better job of waiting while I'm doing busywork, so I pull out my math, which starts to require more thought that I initially thought was necessary, and watch as the problem solves itself in front of me. I can't seem to focus on anything properly anyway, so why not? I can't even name the steps I'm going through, even though logarithms shouldn't be all that difficult.

It's nerve wracking, very, very nerve wracking, to think that the kid who helped me live through culture shock and middle school might not want to hear from me again. Believe me when I say that I wouldn't hold it against him given what we've experienced, but I'm not up for allowing our friendship to fall apart like a Jenga tower. I don't have the heart to allow that to happen, ever. I guess that makes me clingy, but what do I care? That kid is closer to me than my own siblings, although I guess that's a bad example. 

I nearly jump out of my seat as my phone lets loose an entirely too perky chirp. The screen brightens, a notification of a new message casting its light brighter than ever.  _Kuroko Tetsuya_ , it reads. At least I'll have my answer. My background, a picture of Daiki, Ryouta, Tetsuya, and I messing around at the convenience store with the other Miracles casting rather amused glances our way, seems to make the ominous notification a little more welcoming. 

With a few taps and a big breath, I skim over our last texting session to see my stressed, strained query reaching out to grasp at straws. "I'm home, Alex!" Daiki calls as he slams the door shut. My lips curl up into a smile. 

 _We've always been friends, Alex._ Normally, Tetsu doesn't bother with my first name, but when he does use it, he's dead serious.  _A game isn't going to change that. What I said during the game still stands, no matter what the outcome is._ My smile is growing larger. 

 _It wouldn't be much good if we didn't struggle with each other._ I text back, grinning.  _I'm glad I could be of use._ The bluenette takes a long while to reply. 

 _We're friends no matter what, Alex. I don't want you to forget that. Let's see each other again soon, all right?_ The blue-haired wonder comes over and nuzzles into my neck. 

"What're you smiling about?" He murmurs into my ear. 

 _Sure!_ I respond, locking the screen and placing it down once more. "Nothing too special." 


	37. Chapter Thiry-Seven

If there's a single subject I'm weakest at, it's science or math. Right now, chemistry is taking up far too much of my free time. Our class is scheduled for time in the lab room today, and for some reason, our teacher got it into his head that assigning anything other than our usual partners is a good idea. Allow me to explain.

During the first few days of school, we paired up. Naturally, Daiki is my lab partner. Nobody else is capable of handling that child, especially when he doesn't do any of the work himself, leaving everything up to his lab partner. I don't know how he's planning on having another partner do the work for him.

Now, normally the labs are plenty of fun, and today's is plenty simple, but what's making today more intolerable than usual is the boy I'm assigned to be working with. Nope, Alex doesn't get to have a female partner. I get an obnoxious brat who is infamous for making even the most patient of people will herself not to kill him as they scrape together the last of their dignity and self-restraint. For this kid, I have less patience and restraint than usual.

It takes all of two minutes for the incredibly irritable bluenette and I to realize that one way or the other, someone's going to kill my temporary lab partner. There are all sorts of acids and bases scattered across the table, and he's practically daring himself to dip a finger into one of them, which, I believe, is labeled hydrochloric acid. I'm almost up for egging him on, just so he'll stop brushing me awkwardly.

I kind of hope that this is, and isn't, a common occurrence for the other female students who've had the misfortune of being paired up with this kid. He's nothing special, really. Short-cropped dark hair refuses to hide sharp features, incredibly dark eyes, and prominent ears. His lips are incredibly chapped, something that is a little irritating to look at, but nothing I'm ever going to comment on. I just want this period to end as quickly as possible so I can escape the way his hands will accidentally brush my skirt. Daiki is keeping a sharp eye on this touchy-feely guy, but unfortunately, we're on opposite sides of the room, yet another unpleasant surprise, and he can't watch everything. I guess I'll have to fend for myself.

I've never had a keen interest in science, yet I find myself trying to work out a formula for a super-acid just so that this kid won't touch anything anymore. So far, he's caused two acids to spill into one base, setting off an unnecessary explosion, while I'm left to clean up with the very disgruntled teacher murmuring death threats against the kid. The teacher gives me a sympathetic look before racing to keep someone else from nearly killing himself. Somehow, this isn't working out as well as he'd hoped. What was wrong with the way we were before?

"Aaaaalex!" Daiki somehow leans across our table as I work out measurements. I glance up briefly at the goggled, aproned blue-haired boy and raise an eyebrow. "I'm bored." I let out a half-laugh, half-cough of amusement.

"There's nothing I can do about it." I say with all the self-restraint I have going into pacifying my voice. "You'll have to make do with your partner, who, for the record, you have abandoned. Not that I really mind." The bluenette watches my lab partner like a hawk for the brief amount of time the teacher allows him to stay away from his partner. I hope the teacher has learned something valuable from this experience.

"Are you going out with that guy?" My lab partner asks as I measure out our ingredients. He's done nothing but hit on the girls at the surrounding tables.

"Yes." I reply flatly, firmly. The boy gives a hum of interest. I can't seem to recall his name, but I think it started with a Kawa-something-or-other. Kawamura, I think.

I end up doing most of the work until about halfway through class, when the boy jostles into me. I can't tell if it was on purpose or if he did it by accident, but hell if I care. My hand get entirely too close to the safety flame of the Bunsen burner, and I shove it under cold water as soon as I can hurry to the sinks at the back of the room. I then realize, with great displeasure and a rising sense of fury, that Kawamura the Killer is right beside me, grinning as he leans closer. I raise an eyebrow.

"Go back and finish our labs." I say with irritation. The shorthaired buffoon chooses to stay entirely too close. I resist the urge (just barely) to give him a black eye. Violence or not, I don't have much self-control left today. We manage to scrape by.

The blue-haired wonder is seething by the time we get to our next class. Most of it is probably because he had to actually work and got told off by the science teacher. Watching was both concerning and amusing. "I have a game today." I say as we go up to the rooftop. "So I'll be home later than usual." The bluenette makes a noise of acknowledgement.

Game prep is a daylong event, in my eyes. Two days, really. Most of it is getting mentally prepared, eating as healthy as humanly possible (especially on limited funds), and drinking a plethora of water or sports drinks. I normally save any sports drinks until the game is underway.

Today is promising to be _scorching_. I haven't had to play in this sort of heat for a while, but I'm sure it'll be fine. The usual crowd of parents is huddled underneath a tent to shield them from the sun. _Lucky them_. The rest of us make do with the shade of the dugout.

Heat waves are practically visible off the baking clay. I think the only people who get any respite from the heat are those benched, and the outfielders, since the grass doesn't usually get all that hot. I'm just happy it isn't turf, since that would add another five to ten degrees. Then again, we'd all suffer equally. Kidding, kidding. I don't want my teammates to suffer at all.

I'm not catching today. At least, not yet. I'm taking up third base since our usual third baseman went and got herself a broken leg. I don't know how, and I'm not sure I want to know. Something about stairs and sprinklers. Or maybe soccer. I can't really remember. All I know is that the dirt is reflecting heat back up onto my face, and I'm very, very glad I've invested in sunscreen.

The game is more quickly paced than our others. I _think_ we're playing Kaijou, based on the color of the uniforms, but I haven't had a chance to properly read the kanji scrawled across their jerseys. There's just one thing I don't like about this team. Just the one, and it isn't that they're giving us some healthy competition. I cannot stand the way their third baseman is looking at me.

I mean sure, yeah, we could make this personal, claim that she just wants to assess my skill in relation to hers, or we can call it for what it is. I see murderous intent, and it isn't sitting well with me. Or maybe she's glaring because the sun is so horribly torturous today, and it's putting just about everyone in a foul mood, including the sweet, if somewhat calculating, Hayashi. She's already snapped at one of the benched girls and expressed her displeasure about our separated battery combo to me. It's nothing I can help, so I choose to let it slide.

The ball is coming my way, and just as I'm about to snap it up for what could be the easiest play of my life, some massive wall of flesh runs me over. I'm not talking face down, eat dirt, crunch-crunch-crunch. I'm talking flying back a couple feet. Everything is dark for a few moments. Then I hear a horrendous thump, and a great numbness spreads across my neck and the back of my head.

Someone is talking to me. I don't know who, and I'm not entirely sure _why_ , but I'm hoping things will get a little clearer. I can't even understand anything very clearly. I realize that slowly, surely, I can open my eyes. Things are far too bright. My ears are ringing. Why am I curled up in a ball? Pain comes swelling back into the picture. Why am I crying? Landing like this is uncomfortable. Did I cleat myself? Part of my shin is throbbing like there's no tomorrow. "Alex?" My hands are curled around my head like it'll protect me from another hit, but there's no hit to expect.

I wait for things to focus. "Don't get up too soon. Only when you're ready." A melodious voice filters to my ears, drowning out the incessant ringing. I push myself up into a sitting position. "Can you tell me your name?"

"Alex." I say somewhat slowly. "My name is Alex Heights." Something, no, someone is rubbing circles on my back as I push myself into a more upright position.

"Don't get up if it feels like you're dizzy or nauseous. We're not rushed for time. Go slow." I'm trying to get myself back into control.

"Haicchi!" Is that Ryouta? "Hai!" "Alex!" My name is ringing through my ears, and I'm not gonna lie, it's a little worrying. I'm a little dizzy, so it takes me a few minutes to get to my feet, where I waver uncertainly. Pain is blooming across the back of my skull. My neck is screaming of whiplash. I grit my teeth and try to stand.

I suppose they key word in that sentence is _try_. I teeter uncertainly. I'm still trying to see straight, but things are getting clearer and I'm blocking out anything that could disturb my fragile certainty. It takes a while, a long while, for me to attempt walking. I nearly crash to my knees at the first step, and it takes me another few minutes to persuade them that I'm perfectly okay. I jog up and down the foul line a couple times to get myself back in motion. "I'm fine." I say. My speech is a little sluggish. "Perfectly fine. I can play out the rest of the game." Coach looks dubiously at me, but allows me on the field on the condition that I take catcher, not because it's somehow less demanding or any safer, but just because I'm close to an umpire, it'll be easier to keep an eye on me, and the gear should provide me with some amount of protection, given it doesn't give me heatstroke.

As I gear up and take a couple pitches from Hayashi, tossing down to second on the last throw. "Haicchi, are you sure you can play-ssu?" I glance at the blond through a section of the backstop.

"What are you doing here, Ryou?" I ask, waiting for the batter to come back into the box. "I'm fine." I'll be the first to admit that maybe I'm not as okay as I like to say I am, but I'm more than capable of playing. I feel better than ever, more energized than before, although a gloom hangs about my thoughts. I see no harm in continuing to play. After all, this game isn't any fun unless you give it your all. Otherwise it's slow and torturous, boring and tedious. Maybe it's just me. No game is fun without some first rate competition coming from the other dugout. I'm more than ready to play this out until the end. Our victory is almost completely assured at this point. I'm more than confident of it.

All appears to be well until the third baseman comes around to third again. The opposing third baseman, that is. I'm less than happy to see her there, practically staring me down with eyes like coals. I'm ready for her this time. My teeth are gritted, my jaw is set, and my eyes are steady. I'm not afraid of a little pain. After all, if there's anything I know how to do, it's how to take a beating. I've been doing it for years on end. I'm not afraid of cleats or bats or hell, even boys who should be jailed, anymore. I'm not afraid of getting hurt.

She comes, like I expect her to, cleats high, smirk carving across her face. This play is mine, and I'm ready for it. I won't hurt her, no, not purposely. If she just so happens to break her ankle, well, what can I say? I hope her impact with me jars her. Her leg is rigid when it should be ready to flex and give way to the force soon to be exerted on it. Oh, well. I've seen enough. I wait for the spiked cleat, with gleaming metal, to crash into me once more.

It's not as messy as I thought it would be. It's quick, clean, and obvious who has won. I stop the brat a good half a foot from the plate with my body. Her cleat is actually stuck in my chest protector, meaning that she must sharpen her spikes. My glove, ball inside, presses firmly against her leg. Then I watch, with amusement, as she tugs her spikes free, kicking me by "accident," and fleeing for the safety of her dugout. If her coach has any sense at all, he'll pull her before she disgraces her team.

All seems like it's going exceptionally well. That is, until I spin a little too fast and have to ask for time. My head is spinning. I can hardly see straight. "I don't think I'm okay anymore." I squeak to the umpire. "I'm going to throw up."

Gear is pried off me hurriedly as I get increasingly greener. It takes two to haul my sorry ass off the field as my stomach attempts acrobatics. "Lie down!"

Three girls are hustled off the bench, gear is shoved aside, and I'm pushed onto the bench and forced to lie on my back. It wouldn't be quite so bad if a frigid rag hadn't started to numb my forehead, and if a ton of questions weren't being fired my way.

"Where are you from? How old are you? When is your birthday?"

"The States, sixteen..." I'm blanking rather badly on the last question. "Birthday... November 7." Yeah, that date makes sense. It definitely makes sense now that I think about it.

"How did you get hit?" My mind goes blank.

"Could... could you repeat that, please?" Something stressful is pushing at the back of my mind as I force my way up. 

"How did you get hit, Hai-chan?" I scowl as I try to wrack my memory. "Do you know?" 

"Did someone hit me? I probably tripped. I can be clumsy." I murmur. 

"What's the date today?" Anxiety is building as I shake my head slowly. I don't know today's date. "How did you get to school today?" My lip is trembling, so I bite down on it to keep it still. 

"I don't know." I say slowly. "I don't remember. Is Daiki here? Daiki knows. He never comes, so never mind." 

"Hai-chan, can you tell me what you ate for breakfast? Or anything you ate yesterday?" My mouth opens and closes like a fish's as I attempt to recall things that should easily come to mind. 

"I can't recall." I say once more. I look out at the field. "How long as this game been going on?" All I see are wide eyes. 

"Hai-chan...You have a concussion. Do you feel any numbness or tingling? Does anything feel strange?" 

"My head hurts and my neck doesn't want to turn." I reply, "But other than that, I feel fine! Did I trip? Is that it? I should tie my shoes more often." Who is this person talking to me? I don't think I've met them before. "Coach, tell them I'm fine!"

Coach Harasawa only shakes his head. "Come with me, okay?" I blink in surprise. 

"Am I in trouble?" I don't understand why this person keeps questioning me, and why Coach isn't doing anything about it. "Did I do something wrong?" 

"Come with me to the stands. I want you to tell me if you recognize anyone there." He says firmly. I frown before following him, my cleats making awkward clicks against the scorching cement. 

It's nothing but a surprise for me to see a few familiar faces. "Ryouta? What are you doing here?" I ask as the bubbly blond strides over and starts to fuss over me. I scan the stands once more. "What are Daiki and Satsuki doing here? They never come to games like these. You three have got to be boiling." 

"Haicchi, that was a nasty fall! What's wrong?" The blond watches as I give him a look of confusion. 

"I fell?" I look back at Coach. "I fell? Is that why I'm out here? It's probably nothing. I'm fine!" The dark-haired man only narrows his eyes further as he looks at me. 

"Haicchi, you don't remember-ssu?" I can see the pinkette and Daiki walking over quickly. 

"Daiki and Satsuki are here? Why? Ryou, why are  _you_ here?" When did these three show up? Why are they all looking at me like I'm crazy? A bunch of rapid Japanese flies over my head as Ryouta and Harasawa talk, only for Satsuki to butt in, Daiki in tow. 

"Why am I out here?" I ask. Something uneasy is settling in my chest. "We have a game? Why aren't I playing?" Something is missing here, and I can't recall what it is, other than a feeling of mild horror. I look up at the blond and the bluenette in turn, my lower lip quivering once more. 

"Why does my head hurt?" 

 


	38. Chapter Thirty-Eight

_This can't be happening to me._ It's getting too difficult to remember things. I've been quizzed who knows how many times. I don't even know when I started getting questioned like this, or why. Everyone keeps saying I hit my head today, but how can that be? It would explain my headache and the strange stiffness of my neck, but I can remember bits and pieces of today, and I don't recall a fall of any kind.

"Hai-chan!" Satsuki scares me out of my skin as I walk down the street. How did I get here? _Why_ am I here? Everything is confusing. "Hai-chan, where are you going?" I blink in surprise. What's she doing here, anyway?

"I... don't know." I say, frowning as harshly as my face will allow. "How did I get here?" My eyes are burning. Why am I ending up places when I don't recall going there. The pinkette grabs my hand as soon as I start to sniffle. "I'm scared, Satsuki!"

All I get is a carefully constructed look of confidence. "It'll be okay, Hai-chan." Why am I scared again? I guess I'll just have to trust the pinkette. I'm not even sure why she's holding my hand, but I won't complain. I just want to go home.

It takes time to get home. I'm not sure how much, but it takes some amount of time. All I am sure of is that I'm cold and I'm hungry and I want to sleep and I have a headache. Also, I'm crying for some reason. Not sure why, but I can't really control it. At least I'm quiet enough that Satsuki hasn't noticed. Maybe she has, and I've forgotten it.

"Alex! Where did you go?" Seeing Sei here, standing next to Daiki, is both a shock and not a shock. My eyes burn.

"I don't know." I say as I try to hold back the urge to wail. My hands rub my eyes with unnecessary roughness. I just want to sleep. I just want to eat and shower and sleep and remember.

It's dark outside. I wish I knew when it got dark. I wish I knew more than the weird pieces flying through my blank memory. I wish I knew why I keep forgetting things.

What is more than a shock, more than any surprise could equate to, is that as Sei walks closer and closer, he isn't at all terrifying. He looks sad and concerned and above all, worn out. Frankly, it's worrying to see such a proud character in this state. I go rigid as his arms wrap around me.

"Seijuurou?" Am I supposed to hug him back? My arms respond hesitantly to the situation, hugging him gently as I try to understand why everything is weird. This is not like Sei. "When did you get here, Sei?" What I really want to ask is when did _I_ get here.

"I've been here for a few hours, Alex." My face pales, my eyes burn, my nose runs. I think I'm actually going to cry.

I wonder if there's any merit to fighting off the inevitable. I barely manage to do so, hiding my face is Sei's shoulder until he relaxes his grip and steps away from me. "She needs to sleep. Tomorrow it should be a little better." Sei says to Daiki and Satsuki. I wonder why he won't address me.

As soon as the thought is completed, Sei looks to me. "I'll be staying nearby for a few days." With that, he exits without another word. I blink in surprise.

"I'm going home, Hai-chan. Be safe, okay?" The pinkette says after another unidentifiable amount of time.

Daiki and I stare at each other for a long while. Then I glance down, down at my feet and wonder why I'm wearing shoes. I take them off slowly, and wonder why I'm taking them off. This is getting to be a little too much. No, that's a lie. This is going to push me over the edge. I take a piece of paper, a pen that is close, and scrawl over the top _I am going to bed._ Daiki raises an eyebrow, but doesn't comment as I brush past him quietly.

I glance at the paper every now and then, reaffirming that my walk to the bedroom has a purpose, and that I'm not doing things on whim. I fall asleep feeling confused and wishing I understood what was happening to me.

Every once in a while, the bed shakes. Each time, I open my eyes blearily, only to be bombarded with questions. Each time I wake up, it feels like it's the first time I've heard these questions, but it also feels like I've heard them before. I don't know what time it is when Daiki wakes me. "Aomine Daiki, what exactly are you doing?" I hiss, cracking open my eyes. "This is the second time you've woken me."

"You remember the last time?" With a start, I sit up, glancing at the blue-eyed boy with shock before grinning like a fool.

"Yeah! I remember you've woken me up before. A little while ago, I think. You asked me if I remembered anything." A grin is threatening to split my face, and I'm all too happy to allow it. The fact that I'm remembering things is a good thing, it's great actually.

In the darkness of my room, I can see the frown that's a near constant feature on the bluenette's face ease and melt away. "Why do you keep waking me up, anyway? What time is it?"

"Uh, three, I think." He says with a yawn. "They told us not to let you sleep more than a few hours before waking you up to ask you questions. Since you've started remembering things, it looks like we worried for nothing." The urge to roll my eyes is overwhelming, but I suppress it. Daiki was worried, from what I can tell. I appreciate the thought.

"Thank you, though." I say as the bluenette releases another enormous yawn. He looks tired; I can see that now that my eyes have adjusted to the darkness of my room. His futon is a mess of tangled sheets, with cans of a couple energy drinks littering my floor. He really deserves to sleep better than that. "You should go back to sleep. You look tired."

The bluenette makes a sort of grunt of agreement before splaying out his limbs all over my bed. About half of him is on top of me, pushing me back down into the bed. "I'm taking your bed as payment." He grumbles into my pillow. "You can be a bed warmer." I suppose there's really no use arguing with him, especially since he's pretty much passing out and curling his limbs around me. It's not like I have any real complains, after all. Daiki isn't really a snorer, and he's pretty warm. All in all, my only complain is that my bed is a little more cramped than I'd like, but what does that matter? We're both tired. I'll deal with problems as they arise.

My next problem, well, I shouldn't really count it as a problem, but it comes as I walk into the gym at Touou. I guess it isn't a _problem_ -problem, just a problem. It's hard to explain, but you get my drift, don't you? "Seijuurou, what are you doing here?" My head is pounding, my history lesson went way over my head, and all I honestly want is to play, something I'm not allowed to do for the next few days. Parts of my neck refuse to turn as much as I'd like them to, but I won't complain. I'm just happy I'm remembering things.

The redhead is sitting elegantly on the raised part of the gym that I think doubles as a stage for events like the entrance ceremony. Red and gold eyes watch me carefully, as if judging something I have yet to show him. Satsuki told me quite firmly that if I so much as stepped on the court, she was going to throttle me. I decided that judging by the way she was glaring daggers at my steps toward the gym, she was dead serious. I'd rather not be strangled, thank you very much.

With a bit of a struggle, I hop up on the lip of the stage and sit down next to the redhead. "Alex." Sei studies me for a minute.

"Well? Are you going to answer my question?" Some amount of tension seems to ease from the redhead; something I didn't know was actually humanly possible.

"You've regained continuous memory." I guess it's a statement, and not a question. "How far back do you remember?"

"Mm? Since about three this morning." I reply. "I have no idea what happened between the start of the game and then, though." Concern furrows Sei's brows as I rub the back of my head gingerly.

"I see." Sei murmurs. "And your head? Does anything hurt?" Sei's always like this, I think. With me, at least. He's always taken to looking after me, especially after what we like to call _the Fallout_. I shrug slightly in response.

"I get some headaches and my neck is sore, but other than that I think I'm okay." The redhead leans back to examine me, but sits upright when he can't see any serious damage. I didn't even bruise, which I suppose is a good thing, although it irritates me that I still got all the stiffness possible. I can't even hold my head at an angle without using my hands to relieve my neck.

"We went to a doctor." Sei says briskly. "He didn't think it would be too serious, but did tell us that if this didn't go away within twenty-four hours of the impact that you'd be in some trouble. It seems to have cleared up." I nod my head, wincing at the stiffness I'm met with. "What were you doing at three in the morning?"

"Daiki woke me up to ask me questions. Was it the second time? I'm not entirely sure, but I remembered he did it before." I answer, tilting my head slightly. "By the way, I think you're scaring Sakurai. Don't glare at him like that. He'll have an apologizing fit. It's troublesome once it starts." Sei redirects his gaze quickly, dismissing the brunette. It would be a little irksome to have Sakurai apologizing for the next fifteen minutes. 

"I see." The redhead says. "Why did you go to school? Stressing yourself will only slow you down." I'm practically ready to mourn my lost history lesson just for the sake of getting Sei off this topic, but I know it's only going to confirm what he already knows. 

"Didn't want to miss more than I had to." I murmur, slouching and feeling a little deflated. "Could be worse." The nausea that strikes my stomach makes things take a turn for the worse. "Not much worse, but worse." 

And to make a long story short, Sei got concerned; my headache came back, and let's just say that there aren't many people who've used Sei's lap as a pillow. It's probably well worth any punishment though, since his lap is actually quite comfortable. It's quite interesting really. It's a bit of a waste, since nobody else really uses his lap anyway. When all's said and done I guess it can't be helped. Not that I'm complaining, anyway. I don't have the right to. 

I'm on the verge of falling asleep when a stray ball flies dangerously close. It bounces off my stomach, causing me to whip upward, and for pain to shudder down my spine. It takes most of my self-control not to yelp and glare. Instead, I rub my stomach, reach for the offensive ball, and toss it to a very anxious-looking second year. "Let's go outside, Se-" I pause to see that Sei definitely isn't where I left him. It's a little disturbing, to be honest. Where exactly did he go?

It takes me a while to find Sei again, glaring daggers into the back of the second year. I hastily drag him outside so he doesn't end up murdering someone rather innocent. As much as it's nice to be outdoors, away from the constant studying of a certain pink-haired manager, I haven't really escaped, and all I've been met with is a sort of sweltering heat. My mouth begins to feel dry. I should've brought a water bottle today, but I guess it can't be helped. I'll just deal with the heat (barely) and suck it up (I hope). 

With all the tolerance possible for a dehydrated, headachy, somewhat flustered teenage girl, I keep my mouth shut about the heat and incredibly humidity. At least a skirt means my legs will be able to feel some breeze, but the "cute" little sailor top? How about no. At least it doesn't reek of sweat and testosterone out here. Just suffocating perfume from the girls walking by. "Where is Daiki?" Sei asks as I lean back against the outside of the gym. 

"Hm? Probably sleeping. He actually stayed awake during class to take my notes." I reply fluidly, a yawn escaping my lips once more. The redhead raises an eyebrow elegantly, and I can't help but want to laugh at the very unusual act. I guess, in a way, Sei is more human around me than his with the others, although I don't understand why. I can't really explain it. Maybe it's because auras like the ones around him and Daiki and Tetsu and the others never really affected me to begin with. 

But today, today Sei is more human than I've ever seen him, offering me a place to sleep and raising his eyebrow and having an amused smirk toying at the edges of his lips. I want to make him laugh, just to see if it's possible. Then again, I'm not really the funniest person around. I wouldn't count on it happening in the next hundred years. "The game against us is coming up tomorrow." Sei says much more seriously. I see the way his personality flips, and I know what's coming. "I think you know what I'm going to say." With a sigh pressing at my lips, I nod. 

"You don't want me playing, right? I understand. I won't play in the game against Rakuzan." The redhead nods with approval, crossing his arms. 

"Daiki will not be playing, and neither will I. " It makes me uncomfortable to purposely not play, but a game against Sei isn't in my best interests. I'll play, I'll snap, and then, I'll lose. Sei always is assured of victory. That aside, I don't like playing against my former teammates. I'm not  _against_ it, I just don't like it. I don't want to taste defeat at Sei's hands. The sigh I'm holding pushes past my lips with more force than I thought it would have. 

"Yeah, I understand." I murmur, running a hand through my hair. 

"You want to play?" I can practically see the eyebrow rising once more. 

"I always want to play." I answer with a bitter taste filling my mouth. "But Satsuki would kill me if I played tomorrow." The words I choose not to speak fail to cross the distance between us. I'm sure Sei knows what I want to say, but it holds no impact. It never really did to begin with. All I need to do is play as I'm told, and everything will eventually work out the way it's supposed to. Besides, it's not like I'd purposely avoid a game against Sei. It would just be unpleasant, unsatisfactory, and unproductive. It's a guaranteed loss for Touou from where I stand. 

It's sort of uncomfortable to have the knowledge that we'll be throwing this game against Sei. He didn't say anything about playing Atsushi, but I'm fairly certain we'll win since the purple-type giant has absolutely no drive, and Daiki will take the time to play then. He'll probably be in for a challenge since Atsushi is incredibly good at what he does. I guess the game to watch will the Touou vs. Yosen. I do hope we give a fairly good fight during the Touou-Rakuzan match, although I don't have high hopes. 

"That's what you get for playing two sports, Alex. You can't specialize properly if you have your time split." I feel a twitch coming. 

"I can." I say. "Besides, the injury isn't my fault. She purposely barreled straight into me. It's an interference call. I would've gotten two outs if it weren't for her." I sound much more bitter than I really should, but what's there to not be bitter about? It's her fault I have a huge blank in my memory about what happened yesterday. It's her fault I'm still tired and I keep getting headaches and that my neck feels like it'll tear in two if I even move just a fraction too fast or a fraction too far. I'm bitter. I'm definitely very bitter over it, but what can I do? I'm not going to hunt her down. She goes to Kaijou. We'll just obliterate them. 

I don't know how our game turned out yesterday, and frankly, I'm not all that inclined to ask. I mean sure, I should, just so I have the record straight, but that game is already a scratch in my book. Two injured starters? Not a fun day for the coach or the manager. It's not like we won't get Kaijou back for what they did. I'll make sure we mercy them in our next game, that we destroy the Ryou's team. I guess half of it is out of bitterness, but I honestly want a match against Ryouta. I want to see if his perfect copy will apply to me. I guess I'll have to mimic Tetsuya for another game, but what do I care? Seeing Ryouta play seriously is a lot of fun. I'll have to watch a Kaijou match sometime soon. 

Sei has remained silent, assessing me. I guess he's making sure I'm not going to do something stupid, but in all honesty, if I wanted to do something stupid, I would've done it already. "Be ready." He walks away. 

 


	39. Chapter Thirty-Nine

As expected, the game against Yosen was difficult, but a victory. I watched from the stands. For the game against Rakuzan, I occupied the bench, sitting beside Daiki for the first half, and watching him leave the game with some hint of regret flooding through my veins. Halftime is full of tension. "Hai-chan, please play." Satsuki is repeating herself. It's the fourth time she's said this, and all I can do is refuse her.

"I'm sorry. This game is one I can't play in." I've said it four times now. Finally, it seems the pinkette has had enough.

"Then tell me why!" I can hear her temper. "This isn't like you! Why did you even show up if you didn't want to play?" I flinch at that.

"You're right. I shouldn't have shown up." I say calmly. The pinkette throws her hands up into the air.

"Hai-chan!"

"Satsuki!" I mimic. I don't throw my hands up in the air, but my face twists into an angry snarl for a few minutes. "I'll leave, then. You should know better than anyone why I'm not playing. Maybe I misjudged you."

I leave the locker room swiftly, my strides hurried and long. "Alex Heights!" A familiar redhead blocks my path. My eyes widen.

"Kagami..." It looks like he's accusing me of something, looking at me the way he is. "Are you here to yell at me, too?" The redhead frowns slightly.

"No... I'm just wondering why you aren't playing." He says. I shift my gaze away.

"This isn't where I should be." I murmur, running a hand through my hair. "I want to play, but... it's best if I don't take part in this game."

"I don't get it." Kagami says flatly. I smile as best I can.

"I didn't really expect you to." Is it bad that his naivety makes me want to cry? I'm glad he doesn't get it. "Anyway, I'm going home. Enjoy the rest of your day."

I brush past him, hurrying along so I can escape Touou and Rakuzan and Teiko. I don't get far. The redhead grabs my wrist. As much as I want to leave, I can't get myself to shake off his hand. "Please let go, Kagami." If anything, Kagami's grip tightens.

"Let's play." Kagami says after a few tense moments. I blink in surprise.

"Play?" The word itself seems completely foreign, almost as foreign to me as I am to Japan.

"Yeah, one on one. Let's go a few rounds." What is with this kid? Kagami used to look completely wild to me, like a tiger was hunting me in the jungle. He seems much more tame now. I guess he's offering a side of himself I haven't seen before. Or maybe I have seen this, yeah. The swimming pool was a lot like this.

"Okay." My response comes out as a heavy sigh. Red eyes brighten slightly. I wonder where Daiki is. Probably avoiding my foul mood and me. I don't really blame him. I allow myself to be led out of the enormous building and back onto a lonely looking basketball court. The redhead finds a basketball behind some benches. It doesn't take too long to get a steady game started, and it's more than enough to get my mind off the game going on inside.

I don't need the Zone for this game since it's so relaxed, but it still has me playing almost as hard as I can go. I guess this is what I needed. How can Kagami be so ready to play me when just a few games ago he couldn't even stand to look at me? I don't really know the answer to a question like that. I guess I don't really need to know right now. I'm happy just to play for a while.

Things seem fine. Things seem perfect, actually, until an unusually familiar voice calls out to me. "Alex- _chan_ , it's been a while!" It takes all my concentration to finish the shot I'm taking, only for it to bounce off the rim.

"Is there something you want, Hanamiya?" My voice has gone frigid as Kagami and I straighten fully. There's a part of me that wants to bolt, and there's a part of me that wants to get into a fight. Neither of those options are open to me.

"Is there something so wrong about greeting my former teammate's kohai?" He asks, cold eyes glinting like blades. I grit my teeth.

"Yeah, there is." My heart is threatening to break free of my chest. My body aches at the memory of our last meeting. "Stay the hell away from me."

" _Hanamiya_." When I glance over, I can see an incredible fury igniting in Kagami's eyes. "You're the one responsible for Kiyoshi- and..." The redhead looks over to me for a few heartbeats, and then turns back to the dark haired teen. "Kuroko told me about what Hanamiya did to you." My eyes widen slightly, but I don't comment. I'm sure Tetsuya had his reasons.

"Go back to your team, Hanamiya." I reply icily. "There's no reason for you to be here." Rage is boiling in my blood. "You've said hello."

"My, my, that isn't very nice, now is it?" Hanamiya says. His voice is slick as oil, and just as dark. A shiver is threatening to creep down my spine as cold traces icy fingers up and down my sides. It's taking more than anticipated just to stand my ground. It's getting harder and harder to breathe, harder to think, harder to speak. It's like something is lodged in my throat, reaching down to squeeze my heart and burst my lungs. _I want Daiki..._

"What are you doing here?" A loud snarl sounds from behind me, ferocious and furious. I could recognize that deep timbre anywhere. A familiar figure steps out in front of me, blocking me from view. I can't see what's going on anymore, but behind the safety of Daiki's back, I can clutch at his shirt without looking so weak. It's a little shameful to be honest; it leaves me mortified, but this is what I need to do to keep myself from bolting.

"Daiki..." I murmur, my eyes closing slightly. "You're here." The bluenette offers me no response, remaining tense and wound before me, ready to pounce if the opportunity arises.

"Leave, before I make you." Daiki's voice is like a quiet roar, sending shivers down my spine. "If I see you near Alex again, you'll regret it."

"That's not very nice." Hanamiya chimes. How deceiving he is, playing innocent when he's caused so much harm. I try to keep my temper under control. I try to keep my trembling to a minimum. It's embarrassing to be like this, but I can't help it. No, right now I must seem pretty helpless. I want to go home. "It was nice seeing you, Alex-chan." _Don't call me that. I never want to be called that._ I do my best to keep my thoughts silent.

I listen to Hanamiya's footsteps as they recede back toward the enormous sports complex. I'm almost half afraid to see what's going on with Daiki, but what's much more interesting is seeing how the two boys glare at each other with incredibly intensity. They're a little too similar, I think, but if they'd gone to the same school, maybe they would've been friends. "We're going, Alex." The bluenette snaps suddenly, snatching my hand and dragging me away. I don't have the chance to say goodbye to Kagami as I'm tugged along.

"I get it, I get it!" I say as Daiki's strides lengthen too far for me to match. "Slow down a little, Daiki! I can't keep up with you!" My steps are clumsy and awkward in comparison to the bluenette's, but they get most of the job done. It's taking all I can to not get dragged behind the tall boy. "Dai-"

I have no idea where we are, but there's an alley, and a wall, and my back has just been introduced to the scuffed bricks. "Ouch." I murmur, feeling the rough texture of the wall scrape against my skin. I look up at the bluenette to see a brilliant, burning blue drilling holes into me. For a moment, everything seems to grind to a stuttering halt. Is he angry with me?

I'm about to ask, about to open my mouth, when Daiki covers my lips with his own. All I taste is hunger and ferocity and a glowing sort of passion. Surprise keeps me rigid and frozen for a few moments, but then my insides feel like they're melting and the wall doesn't seem as important and I can't really think anymore. I want to breathe, but it doesn't seem as necessary anymore. I guess air is optional.

He pulls away, trailing down my jaw, nipping and sucking rapidly before he reaches where my neck and shoulder meet. I get one brief, intense moment of eye contact before he growls out "mine" and bites down.

Some strange hybrid of a yelp and a squeal and something embarrassingly similar to a moan escapes my lips. Heat rises to my cheeks as I hear the noise take life into the air, but whatever Daiki's doing (and I like to pretend I really don't know what he's doing for the most part) feels strange and a little painful, but it isn't all that bad. Another incredibly embarrassing noise drips past my mouth.

For yet another brief moment I'm met with that all too intensely burning look. He pulls away, kisses me a little less aggressively, and keeps his hands on either side of my head, leaning against the wall. I don't need to look down to know that a bright red mark will soon be darkening. "I don't want you playing basketball with that idiot." Daiki growls.

Is he actually jealous? Jealousy isn't really a nice color on anyone, but it somehow suits the bluenette. "If you want to play one on one, you can play _me_." He says more calmly. My eyes are wide and surprised and probably looking a little confused, especially since Daiki has offered to play basketball, but its soon swept away. "How long was Hanamiya there?" I frown for a few moments, thinking back.

"Not long, I think. It felt like forever, but he wasn't there very long." The bluenette breathes a relieved sigh, the deep frown on his face lessening slightly. The tension that lines his shoulders melts away fluidly. My fingers itch to gingerly rub the frown away.

They do, as it turns out. At first, it seems. The frown looks about as permanent as it gets. It smooths away beneath my fingertips. My expression slowly softens to something I hadn't known I knew how to make. "You worry too much." I murmur, pressing my lips to the bluenette's jaw. "It's fine. I have you, after all."

Daiki makes a rumbling noise deep in his throat. The frown almost comes back to life. "You don't really give me much of a choice. You just attract trouble, don't you?" He replies. My face threatens to flush.

"Not all the time!" I say with embarrassment. Heat rises to my cheeks. With the threat of a sigh pushing at my lips, I withdraw slightly, feeling the wall a little too close for comfort. "Let's go, Daiki. Unless you want to stay here?"

"I can think of a few other places I'd rather have you." The bluenette's voice is low, sending a shiver down my spine. My face reddens further.

"Is that so?" I say teasingly, hoping to cover up my embarrassment as I allow my sleeves to drop down to my fingers. My jacket is too large, but it's warm and comfortable.

"Here is fine, if that's what you prefer. Out here, where everyone can see-" a sudden yelp sounds from the bluenette's throat, and my eyes widen in surprise. None other than Kagami stands behind him, looking nothing short of feral.

My face is red-hot and a mask of shock, gaze flickering between the feral redhead and the infuriated bluenette. "What do you think you're doing?" Daiki snarls, his gaze hardening to nothing short of steel.

"I could ask you the same thing." Kagami growls. "This is public space. If you want privacy, go somewhere else." I'm actually really confused. What does Kagami think he's doing? Why is he interrupting?

The two stand chest to chest, glowering, and I'm nothing's short of surprised when neither of them bares their teeth in a snarl. "Let's go, Daiki." I say hesitantly, grabbing the bluenette's sleeve.

"I want you to remember something, Bakagami." I haven't heard anger like this in a while. "Alex chose me, not you. Mind your own damn business, and stay the hell away from her. She's mine!"

I can see a frigid retort about to drop from Kagami's mouth, and I know that if it hits Daiki's ears, bad things will happen. "Let's go home, Daiki." My voice is louder and a little more firm than before.

"I'm done here." Daiki growls, turning away and slinging his arm across my shoulder as we walk out of the alley.

"Just wait until you mess up, Ahomine! I'll be waiting." Kagami's voice chases us out into the sidewalk and partially down the block. I don't bother to look back. It's useless. It's weak.

"Daiki?" The bluenette is caught in a stony silence as we return to our familiar neighborhood. "What are you thinking of?"

I'm met with silence, the same silence that's engulfed us since we hit the pavement. It's impossible to say I'm not worried, but I have no idea what to do. The walk upstairs is dead silent. The process of taking off our shoes goes without a word.

I open my mouth to ask Daiki another question to find him staring at me intensely. Did I do something wrong? all of five seconds passes before the wall is my new best friend and the bluenette's lips are at the hollow of my throat, nipping and kissing, tugging my oversized jacket down to get as much skin as possible. "D-Daiki!" I say in surprise, my eyes widening. "What are you doing?" All I hear is a low rumble, and I feel teeth against my skin, biting hard enough to make me yelp. My knees are going weak, my legs are losing strength. My hands grab onto his shoulders, onto his hair, desperate as I try to remain upright.

"I want all of them to know." He says, biting and kissing and sucking at any available skin. "All of them will know."

The sounds that spill from my throat are mortifying and loud, my cheeks are burning with embarrassment. It sounds all too lusty. Daiki is winding me up a little too much. "Know w-what?" I squeak, my thoughts beginning to decay toward mindlessness.

"Mine." Daiki is possessive, I knew that much, but this seems a little too much. I haven't seen this side of him before. "I want everyone to know." I yelp as teeth sink into my flesh.

"I think you've made it quite clear, Daiki." I say. I feel liquid. Something inside me is threatening to snap, to take over. I can feel it coming closer, just within my reach. I can feel it climbing over me. The Zone is coming. I don't want to be the submissive. I want to take control. I want to see Daiki melt under my fingers. I want to see what happens if we use the Zone like this. Would you call it an abuse of power?

Things are over before they have a chance to take off. The Zone recedes, my heart is beating so fast I can hardly feel it, and my skin is flushed to the max.  As much as it seems the next steps would be oh so easy, we don't take them. We stop. It's probably a good thing we do. I think Daiki might be doing this out of jealousy, and maybe I'm doing this since jealousy suits Daiki a little too well. I'm not complaining. 

"I have to go take a shower." The bluenette says suddenly. He brushes the side of my neck gingerly before turning quickly and hurrying into the bathroom.  _He forgot a towel._  Amused, I find his towel and some of his clothes, leave them in a neat pile outside the door, and turn on the TV before looking through the fridge. We're out of almost everything, so I leave a note, grab my phone and my wallet, and march myself outside, tugging on my jacket to cover up what I can. 

It's surprisingly cold for summer, but it isn't entirely uncomfortable. The cool air helps to calm my thinking. By the time I reach the store my cheeks are pink and my nose is a red. The storeowner smiles at me upon entering, sending a greeting over the small crowd around him. He's a nice guy, and his children are nice as well. I'm not sure if he's married or where their mother is, but that doesn't really matter, does it? They look exceedingly happy. 

I'm glad I have my jacket on. I don't want to explain myself or get any strange looks thanks to Daiki's unfailing handiwork. It could be worse, I suppose, but let's not dwell on that. I narrowly avoid small children as I grab produce, bread, and a couple instant meals and a few cuts of meat. My wallet aches, but my stomach is going to be very happy. My job pays well enough, and Daiki takes turns with buying groceries, so I'm getting along well enough. 

I get back in time to see Daiki grab the things I set outside his door. Slipping my shoes off and shrugging out of my jacket, I put the groceries away before making one of the few meals I can- stir-fried rice. Tetsuya's mom taught this one to me since I always liked it a lot, and I'm very glad she did. Now if only I could look at Daiki without turning a thousand shades of red.

 


	40. Chapter Forty

Something heavy and warm is pressed against my back as I sink ever deeper into my bed. It's a nice warmth, especially since my blanket seems to be tangled around my legs, neglecting everything above my knees. It's all right since the warmth against my back branches out across my torso and curls around me tightly. A groan resounds behind me, low enough to hum against my skin. "Daiki?" My voice is still tainted with sleep, begging to be lulled back into a stupor.

A resonating noise of sleep sounds behind me, confirming my guess. I'm not entirely sure how things ended up this way, but I don't really care. I'm tired and lazy. That is, until my phone rings. The caller is someone I really shouldn't ignore. "Hello?" I groan, hoping my sleepy voice doesn't scream of me being slightly stupefied.

"Alex." The voice greets warmly. A little too warmly, actually. "Come meet me today. I'm in Tokyo for a while since my parents have business here."

"What time is it?" On weekends, I'm not entirely human before noon.

"It's eleven thirty. I'll drop by in an hour and a half. You should probably wear something a little nicer than your usual."

"So no sweats? Or band tees?" All I hear is a low series of chuckles.

"I'll see you at one." The call ends with a clean click. 

"Was that Akashi?" Daiki murmurs, his arms pulling me closer to his warmth. A happy noise rumbles up my throat. 

"Yeah." I reply, feeling him tense behind me. "It's nothing to worry about. I can handle Sei." A yawn spills from my open mouth as I wriggle free, feeling cold as soon as I stand. I just want to crawl back into bed and sleep for a while longer. That can't be helped, I suppose. I'm in the shower as soon as I find my towel. 

The water is frigid as I hop about quickly, trying to adjust the temperature quickly. It warms to something just short of scalding, so I get to work quickly, so the hot water doesn't run out before I'm done. My soap is especially fragrant today. It's a new type after all, I guess, since I ran out and Daiki went out to get more. All I can smell is orange blossom, something sickeningly sweet compared to what I usually use. It doesn't even smell remotely similar to the real thing. 

I towel off quickly, and kicking Daiki out of the bedroom, attempt searching for Seijuurou's version of "nice" but not "formal". Let me tell you, I don't go shopping for clothes often, and I don't own very many "nice" sets of clothes, and I'm starting to wish I had. It takes me fifteen minutes to settle on something that even Sei can't call casual, but can't call formal. Yes, this is my definition of nice clothing. Awkwardly between formal and casual. 

My hair dries slowly, so I'm forced to blow-dry it if I want even the slightest hope of brushing it and making it look somewhat presentable. I finish my preparations for meeting Sei with five minutes to spare, and a growling stomach for all my efforts. I get out of the bedroom in time to get ambushed by Daiki. His arms wrap around me from behind as I enter the kitchen, his chin atop my head. "Be careful today." He murmurs, twisting some of my hair. 

"I will." I say with a relaxed smile. "You know as well as I do that Sei isn't prone to injuring his former teammates." Daiki snorts with disbelief but doesn't say anything. I can practically see the way he's rolling his eyes and the twitch that is probably playing at one corner of his lips. I'm halfway to the door when it opens, Sei walking in like he owns my apartment. 

"Good, you're ready." He says. He doesn't voice any objections to my attire, just a half-smile that vanishes quickly. I only barely caught it myself. "We'll be going then. I'll assume you didn't eat yet." I raise an eyebrow, but give a sort of half-nod. 

"I'll see you later, Daiki." I chirp, waving slightly as I'm urged out the door. "Don't set anything on fire." 

"Yeah, yeah." He replies with a roll of his eyes and a curve of a smile. "Take care." The door closes quickly, and the silence of the hallway surrounds us. Sei looks more normal than usual. More like he was when I first met him. It reminds me of what happened after the Fallout.

_The windows are higher than I thought here in the gym. The boys are practicing down below, and because Seijuurou and Tetsuya can't help me practice when they practice with the others, I'm left to watch until I'm told to leave. I'm not in my gym clothes yet, but I'll be changing pretty soon, and then I'll go to an empty gym, probably the third one._

_It's so much fun to watch the others practice, but it also fills me with a dreadful sense of longing. I'm not sure where Nijimura went, but I haven't seen him in quite a while. Sei says I can start to practice with the first string in a while, when everything is grounded more fully and things calm down. I'm the one who will upset the balance once more, so it's best to wait out the current chaos._

_My phone buzzes. It's surprising for two reasons. One, it's likely my family, who never bother to call me, and two, I haven't heard from them in six weeks. I'm a little too eager to open my phone, my face lighting up when I see it's a text, only to fall when it's from my unhappy brother. Foolishly, I think I'll be met with something I can help. Predictably, I'm not. Surprisingly, this is actually not about what problems my absence is causing._

_My face pales as I read things I hadn't thought I'd see, and only grows paler and more confused as the message delves into emotional chaos. I'm confused, and I'm getting angrier and angrier. I did nothing to deserve this. I'm here for school, not to start fights. My screen is getting blurry as tears fill my eyes._

_A surge of indignation closes my phone, and an increasing level of confinement pushes me out into the courtyard. I feel like I'm choking on air. A few deep breaths find me sitting near the walkway, looking over the message carefully. With a sigh, I decide it's time to call home. "Hello?" The voice is welcome to my ears, soothing and smooth._

_"Dad! It's Alex. How are things?" Harsh coughing sounds through the phone. "Is everything alright?"_

_"Alex? I haven't heard from you in ages! Your mother's been very... upset. You might want to come home for a while." A shrieking noise sounds in the background. "Or rather, not at all if you can help it. This place isn't the way you left it. You'll be subjected to-" more shrieking "-that, for the most part. Are you having fun?"_

_"Yep! I'm learning how to play basketball, and I've made a lot of new friends! They're all really nice. I’m getting better at Japanese and I'm not failing math yet!"_

_"Tell me about your friends." My dad's voice is pleasant to listen to. Soft and undemanding, sweet and comforting. He's the gentlest person I know. Tetsuya and his parents are the only ones who come close._

_"Ah! Tetsuya Kuroko, my homestay, is a lot like you! He's got light blue hair, it's true!, and he's so quiet that he practically vanishes. Daiki Aomine is loudmouthed and a little slow, but he's amazing at basketball! Then there's-" I go through the Miracles and my softball teammates. "But how are you doing, really? You sound sick."_

_"I'm not doing so well, it seems." My father says wearily. "I'm actually pretty sick. It's gotten worse. I've been in and out of the hospital for the past few weeks. They think... they think it might be terminal." Horror paints a mask across my face._

_"You can beat it! You can! I believe in you!" I say hoarsely. Coughing follows suit._

_"Your siblings are getting to be quite the handful. Janine is playing soccer, and your brother's doing lacrosse."_

_"I-Is that so?" I reply pleasantly. "Dad, I love you." My dad laughs cheerfully._

_"I love you, too, Alex. I have to go, otherwise your mother will-" I finally recognize my mother's voice in the background as the phone emits static and then projects yelling. "Alex! Is that you?" I blink in surprise._

_"Mother?" Sickeningly sweet tones carry through my phone._

_"You haven't called in forever, sweetie." The endearment sounds like it's being spat out like poison. "You spend so much time away from us. Come home so I can re-familiarize you." Something is off. "After all, if you have the energy to be so distracted playing another sport and making new friends, you certainly have the energy to come home and return to normal. I sent you there to learn. Your learning is done." A frown draws across my face._

_"M-Mother, I can't leave now. It's the middle of the year, and I have-"_

_"Come home now, or I'll force you."_

_"You can't force me to do anything!" I say forcefully, shock running rampant. "You promised I could finish out the year! You said one more year since I couldn't leave earlier! You can't just uproot me-"_

_"Listen to me carefully, you brat. You owe me. I've fed you, clothed you, sent you to school. I sent you over to Japan. You haven't accomplished anything I told you to. You haven't used that Akashi boy, you haven't made any meaningful relationships, you haven't even changed in the slightest. You need to be disciplined. I've given you too much freedom!" The rant goes on, and on, and on._

_"Mom, I can't- I can't use people! I don't want to! I'm not going to use my friends! These friends aren't meaningless! They're important to me and-" And what? What can I say to get her to take back what she's said? "I'm not your puppet, Mother. You can't expect me to live as something to be ordered around like a pet."_

_"You will." How long has my vision been blurry like this? "You're an utter failure without my guidance. I will have you home on the next flight, or you will stay in Japan, without my help, forever." Why? Why am I getting an ultimatum? What did I ever do to deserve this?_

_"Mo-"_

_"You're as useless as always. I was wrong to think you'd grow up at all. Don't come back, Alex. There's no place for you here. You're just a burden on this family." The phone call ends with a decisive click, and I'm left staring at the screen._

_"Here you are, Haicchi! Akashicchi is looking for you-ssu!"_

_"Thanks, Ryouta... I'll be there in a minute." I don't dare to look up at Ryouta. He'll know something's wrong the minute he looks at my face._

_"Hai...cchi?"  I hear him walk closer._

_"Please, Ryou. Go tell Sei. I'll be there in a minute." Ryou says nothing for a few minutes._

_"Okay, Haicchi. Come talk to me when you're ready-ssu." He jogs off, back toward the gym and the kids I wish I could join. I'll be fine in a few minutes. I will be. At least, that's what I insist, trying my best to smile while my tears overflow once more._

_"Are you trying to be difficult, Alex, or does it just come naturall-" Sei's voice drops abruptly. "Was it... It was." I try to laugh. A sob spills out instead, tragically desperate, nothing short of humiliating._

_"I'm sorry. I'll be up in just a second." Try as I might, I can't force my legs to work properly. "My dad's sick. It's bad. Everyone's moved on, ignoring it. My mom's leaving me here since I won't go." My voice is quivering too much. "I owe you an apology, Seijuurou. I owe you much more than an apology. Will you listen?"_

_Elegantly, Sei sits down beside me. "The... the only reason I wanted to come here was to learn Japanese, to see things another way. I... am really happy here. I'm really, really happy. I couldn't ask for more than to stay here with all of you. You're all my friends. You all mean the world to me. I've never been this happy._

_"The reason I was... sent here was because of my mother. She's a businesswoman. I'm not sure what her company does anymore. She sent me here because I was... I was supposed to use you. I was supposed to befriend you and get your father and his company involved with my mother's. Knowing that, I came here, to Teiko, and I did what I could to get information on you, and as hard as I tried, as hard as I tried to use you, to get myself to use you..." A strangled pause chokes my words._

_"I really couldn't do it. I couldn't use one of my friends. I couldn't.... I wouldn't use you. Not you, not Tetsuya, not anyone else. I'm so, so sorry Seijuurou. I'm so sorry. I can't do it. Not to you or anyone. So I get to stay here, useless. I'm as useless as always..." I can't help laughing. Laughing and laughing as tears drip and land on my folded hands. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sei."_

_"That's enough, Alex." Warmth is all around me, unannounced. "I understand."_

_"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, Seijuurou. I've really done something unforgivable this time."_

_"You haven't done it. You've told me the truth." Seijuurou is quiet and calm. "Promise me something." In my need to please, I nod my head._

_"Of course."_

_"You won't be manipulated by that person again. You aren't a puppet, Alex, so don't act like one. Do you understand? Promise me you won't talk to her again." A noise of unease clambers past my lips. "Promise me."_

_"I promise." I murmur. "I'm not needed there anyway. There's no longer a place for me in that house."_

Sei is calm as I go with him, quiet and calm and collected. "Sei... you don't look much like your mother." My voice is quiet as I broach the subject. I know I shouldn't be saying anything, but the statement came out before I'd thought much of it. 

"She's my stepmom." Sei says flatly. "Dyes her hair red since it looks better." 

"Sorry." I murmur. "I shouldn't have said anything." Sei shakes his head as we step outside. 

"You were bound to find out sooner or later. My actual mother died when I was still in elementary school." I nod my head. 

"I'm sorry for your loss." The redheaded captain says nothing in return, only sighing and glancing at me once before staring straight ahead. 

"My stepmother... she thinks of you like her own child. I don't really understand why. She likes you a lot." I nod slightly. "If you're wondering what my father thinks, I can't answer that for you." I offer the redhead a smile. 

"Thanks for sharing, Seijuurou." I can't hide the smile in my voice. "It's... refreshing." He chuckles beside me, placing a hand on my head and roughly ruffling my hair. "Wa- Sei, don't do that!" There's no actual punch to my words, just laughter making it hard to understand. 

The redhead doesn't stop ruffling my hair until I manage to bat his hand away. "Geez, Sei!" Laughter is still bubbling past my lips. "This is unusual, for you especially." Sei offers me a strange smile, one that's a mixture of brotherly and something else. 

"Oh? Is it a crime now to touch your hair?" Sei challenges, narrowing his eyes slightly. Almost off-putting, but I'm too used to Sei to think he's intimidating anymore. Scary? Sometimes, but not malevolent at all. 

"Maybe~!" I chirp, dodging his hand again. "You never know!" He chuckles. I'm used to Seijuurou this way. He's definitely different when it comes to basketball, when it comes to school and teams and all of that, but it seems like he can finally be human when we find ourselves in each other's company. I don't mind this sort of thing; rather, I wish it happened more often. Sei will look after those he cares about. When the loyalty goes both ways, the whole world opens up. 

"Have you considered coming to Rakuzan?" I blink in surprise at the sudden question. 

"To be honest, I haven't given it all that much thought. It's a good school. The athletic programs are fantastic. It's far though, and..."  _and Daiki doesn't go there._ "I've adjusted to Touou. I'm happy there. I think it would be a bad idea to transfer there in the middle of the year. Besides, you already have a team that you can use. Touou might not desperately need me, but I'm a regular. I like my teammates." 

A sigh escapes Sei. "I see. I'll admit that it might not be so beneficial academically for you to transfer, but I wouldn't mind having you on my team again." I guess that's Sei's version of a compliment this time around. It still makes my insides glow with pride. "My team has come together, but we don't have anyone who plays like you do. That aside, it's... unseemly for someone in our position to play against each other. And for us to not play at all, well that's not fair, is it? 

"My father thought it best that you transfer to Rakuzan. Of course, since you're legally a ward and not a child of the Akashi family, he won't force you, but there's no one here to keep a close eye on you." Sei glances at me with amusement. "Not that you'd really need it." I roll my eyes. 

"I'll... think about it. I will. But don't expect the answer he's looking for. Satsuki can keep an eye on me if he's really that concerned. I'm happy here." Sei gives me a calculating, but somewhat approving look. 

"So I see." 

 


	41. Chapter Forty-One

Kaijou's campus is beautiful. It's not as new as Seirin. It's still just as pretty, with a huge number of students flooding its hall and some rather fancy looking uniforms. "Haicchi, you came!" Ryouta's voice echoes across the gym. "Haaaaaicchiiiii-ssu!"

My feet suddenly leave the floor as the blond engulfs me in a hug, pulling me off my feet in his enthusiasm. "R-Ryouta!" My voice cracks from surprise. "Let me go!" He doesn't drop me for another couple minutes despite my protests. "What, did you think I'd go back on my word?"

The blond boy only laughs nervously, scratching the back of his head, before a kick out of nowhere sends him crashing into me. We both tumble to the ground in a tangle of awkward limbs. "Kasamatsu-senpai! That was mean!"

"R-Ryou, get off! You're h-heavy!" It takes energy to get out from under Ryouta's weight, especially with the grinding foot of what I can only assume is the team captain. "Kasamatsu, huh? Pleased to meet you."

"Haicchi, help me-ssu!" I raise an eyebrow as he grabs my ankle.

"You should _not_ be grabbing that one." I say flatly. "Besides, you just fell on top of me. I don't really feel like it~!"

"Nice to meet you. Kasamatsu Yukio. I'm the team captain. Has Kise always been this impossible?" Kasamatsu has very, very blue eyes. It's a little shocking, to be honest. I offer him a smile. His hands are shaking slightly, although I'm not sure why.

"I'm Alex Heights. Please call me Hai." I glance down at the blond as he brushes himself off. "Yeah, he's kinda always been like this. Isn't that right, Kise-san?"

"That's just cruel, Haicchi!" Ryou whines. I snicker. Maybe I have a sadistic streak. I pat his head.

"There, there, Mr. Kise." I say with mock sympathy. "It's okay to cry. Maybe it isn't, actually. Don't cry, Mr. Kise!"

"Crue-" Kasamatsu's foot sends him flying once more. "Kasamatsu-senpai! You're enabling her-ssu! Haicchi help me out!"

"Fine, fine, since you asked so nicely." I say cheerily. A grin coats my face as I offer him a hand. "Upsie daisy." The blond bounces to his feet. "Anyway, I'm just here to watch. See you, Ryou. It was great meeting you, Kasamatsu."

"Before you go, I have questions for you." I can't help the surprise that coats my face. I can't even refuse.

"Of course." My surprise shows. Ryouta tries to intervene, objecting immediately, but I wave him off. "No, Ryouta, it's fine. I don't have any issue answering questions for Kasamatsu." The blue-eyed captain seems to be hiding a grin.

"Do you call everyone by their first name?" Ah, is that jealousy I hear? I shrug.

"I call the people I respect most by their first names. Mostly my former teammates." The green-eyed monster seems to die down. "Although I'm half surprised it hasn't gotten my killed. It's a leftover thing from my..." I can't really call it home. "I guess birthplace is the right word."

"You played with Kise?" Kasamatsu's voice is surprised, his eyes wide and seemingly startled. Slowly, I nod.

"Yeah, at Teiko. I came after he did." I can't place the emotion on the older boy's face, but I'm not entirely sure I like it.

"Where do you play for?" I raise an eyebrow.

"Touou Academy. We'll be playing you at Winter Cup, I'm sure." His doubt in my abilities as caused me to bare my fangs. "It'll be fun to watch."

"Haicchi!" Ryouta's too quick for his own good sometimes. "We won't lose to you! Your or Momoicchi or Aominecchi!" A grin splits my face as I examine the blond.

"I'm done growing. It would be expected for me to lose to you, to lose this team, due to my height and my gender. But I have Daiki's Zone, Tetsu's Misdirection, Satsuki's mind, and Sei's eyes. I won't lose to you even if it kills me." The air between us is thick with tension. "But I'm not here to challenge you. None of us need that."

Ryou's standing over me, practically growling. "Make sure you watch carefully, Haicchi. I'll show you something you haven't seen before." The blond's eyes have darkened, and my grin has widened.

"I got it, I got it." I say, waving slightly. "Unless your Kasamatsu has any more questions?" The blue-eyed boy laughs.

"What I got can wait 'til after the game." He says lowly.

"Good luck, then." I say, smiling. "I hope you have a good game."

I'll say this now and hope it sticks, but I never meant to challenge Kaijou, or Ryou, or Kasamatsu. I'm watching them play with an incredible amount of intensity. They win the game, that's a given, but it's brutal. I haven't seen this sort of viciousness since Teiko. I can hardly stand to watch the losing team. My chest feels like its constricting.

The game is over quickly, like expected. It takes me a minute to take in the score and close my notebook, tucking it into my backpack. Then I'm walking from the viewing balcony, bouncing down the stairs, and waiting in the doorway as things are wrapped up. "Haicchi, come over here-ssu." Dodging a stream of what I can only assume is Ryouta's fan girls, another group then swallows me.

It takes a lot of effort and both Ryou and Kasamatsu to pull me out of the throng of people. My heart is racing, my eyes are wide and surprised and probably a little red. "Haicchi?"

"I thought.... There was... He wasn't here, right?" My chest is heaving as I glance over the crowd again. I'm looking over all the faces, double and triple checking for the one I thought was here. "My imagination. Sorry. I'm bad with crowds." I grin apologetically. "Anyway, good game! That was fun to watch!"

Then, more seriously, I look at the uncertain duo before me. "I should apologize for how I spoke earlier. It was rude and cocky of me, especially when I'm talking to my former teammate and his teammates." My voice is quiet, as always, but carries the weight of my words appropriately. "I don't have the self control to take doubt in how I play well. I hate losing, especially to any of the former Miracles."

I roll my shoulders a couple times, cracking the joint a little painfully. Ryouta raises an eyebrow. "You didn't happen to hit your head again, did you-ssu?" I shake my head.

"Nah, sorry. Then my behavior would be more excusable. Anyway, you had questions, Kasamatsu?" I offer him a slight smile. "I'll answer all of them."

"You can enter the Zone?" Is he trying to gauge my abilities? I nod.

"I can enter the Zone." I confirm.

"How high can you jump?" I blink.

"Mm, not quite as high as Tai- Kagami, but high enough. I don't do too much jumping." He raises an eyebrow. "What, do you want me to jump for you? I'm not against it, but it's going to be a waste of your time. I can jump higher during games than I can here."

The blue-eyed boy rises an eyebrow. "I'm just lazy. I won't do it if I don't have to." A sigh escapes Ryou's mouth.

"Touou's gotten good this year. Better than last year, right?" I shrug.

"I don’t know. I guess. I'm not really interested in Touou's history." I guess Kasamatsu doesn't like that answer much. "You should as Imayoshi. Although he's a bit sadistic, he's most knowledgeable."

"I just have a few more." We're outside now, braving the afternoon air. "Why are you here? In Japan?"

"Senpai-" Ryouta's trying to tell him off, but there's no point.

"That's really none of your business." My voice drops a few degrees, fueled by anger. "And it doesn't really matter anyway." The boy bites back a retort of some kind. "I'll give you one more question, but then I need to go. Hopefully you'll make it an interesting one."

"That's fine." Kasamatsu looks thoughtful for a few moments. Quietly, we continue walking. "Why are you playing basketball? Particularly boys' basketball?" I laugh slightly.

"That one's not interesting at all, Kasamatsu! You kind of wasted your question." I grin. "I'll answer it anyway. It's simple, really. Seijuurou asked me to play, so I am. That's the long and the short of it."

"Eh?" The disbelief written across his face makes me laugh.

"I didn't want to play. I play softball. Adding basketball would've only hindered me. Sei asked me to play. He worked everything out. I even got back at my coach. It got fun when I got better." I hope this clarifies things a little.

"But if you don't play for Teiko anymore, why are you still playing?" Ryouta laughs. I snicker.

"It got fun. I got good. I got scholarships. I didn't see a reason to quit." I offer the blue-eyed boy a grin. "Isn't that why anyone plays? Because it's fun?" He laughs, we part ways.

 

I'm exhausted. My legs are kind of wobbly and my softball uniform is streaked with dirt and maybe a little blood. "Sorry I'm late." I say as I enter the basketball gym. "I'll get changed."

"Hai-chan, what happened to you?" Satsuki's notice echoes across the gym as practice comes to a grinding halt.

"Ha? I had a game. It ran later than expected." My ankle is screaming in agony.

"No, _look_ at you!" Her hands are cupping my face. "Stop playing softball!" A laugh tumbles out of my mouth before I pull away, stumbling my way into the locker room.

I have to pry my uniform off, wondering when it got so hard to change my clothes. My practice clothes are much fresher, smooth against my skin. "Hai-chan, rest a little bit. It's not a suggestion. I'm _telling_ you." I'm surprised it's Imayoshi to tell me this. Normally, he just let's me do as I please.

"Imayoshi..." Ah, I sound more tired than I should. It's embarrassing, really.

"Sit out. Take a nap." I grit my teeth.

"I can't just do nothing." When did I get so desperate to wear myself down to the bone? I probably don't have enough energy to even make it through the remainder of practice.

"You can make it up tomorrow. Take today to rest." A sigh threatens to pull itself out of me. "I'm telling as your captain, take a break today. Pull an Aomine." I laugh a little at that.

"Yeah. Okay. I get it." I wave Imayoshi off and flop onto the bench. It's a little cold against my skin. "I won't practice today."

"Besides, it's not like we can use you today anyway. We're not doing anything we haven't done before." The comment stings.

"You should watch your mouth, or you'll scare all the girls away." I murmur teasingly. "Go away. I want to nap." Imayoshi doesn't make much of a comment other than to give a sort of scoff and walk out quietly. While it lasts, I enjoy the peace.

Unfortunately, peace doesn't seem to last long wherever I'm involved. I'm sleeping quite happily when the door opens and an incredibly heavy weight sits on me precisely where it shouldn't. A sort of half-shriek escapes my mouth. The weight vanishes, I fall from the bench, and I have no hopes of falling back asleep. My back is in agony.

"Alex?" My hands cover my face as I lay on the ground, trying to find my composure again.

"It hurts..." I murmur, wanting to curl up into a ball. "Why would you sit on me?"

"Look, I'm sorry." Daiki, with all due credit, does sound apologetic. "What happened?"

"I had a game, that's what." Why do I always get injured during games? Do I not respect others enough? Do I taunt them? "I got hit with a bat again and then the pitcher nailed me twice in the same place." My shoulder aches, the middle of my back is about to sport bruises, and my legs feel like jelly.

"There's a girl outside asking for you. Wouldn't leave me alone. Some chick called Sozome?" I groan in response. I'm supposed to catch her tonight for pitching practice, but that shouldn't be for at least another hour and a half. I'm just not up to that right now.

"Crap." I groan, tugged to my feet by the blue-haired wonder. "Why do you do this to me, Sozome?" She's a pitcher, yeah, but she hasn't pitched much in games yet. It's going to stay that way until she finally gets her pitches under control. Fastballs? Great. Curve? Screw? Tolerable. Rise and drop? Kill me now.

"Sozome." I say warmly as I exit the locker room and nearly run her over by accident. I thought we weren't practicing for a while..." The dark-haired girl blushes slightly.

"Sorry. Would it be possible to practice now? I know you're probably tired, so it's okay if you can't, but my brother got sick and when we practice is when my mom goes off to work and he'll be home alone." I barely manage to keep jealousy from flitting across my face.

"Of course. I hope he isn't too sick. Let me get my gear, and I'll be right out." Imayoshi and Satsuki are on the verge of calling me out and keeping me here, but I escape the gym before they have a chance to tell me otherwise. Who do they think they are, anyway? My parents?

My bag feels heavier than usual as I carry it out to the softball field. Of course, I'm not oblivious to the footsteps behind us, but I'm not in the mood to call anyone out. My gear feels enormous, my cleats heavy, my glove a dead weight. I shouldn't be doing this, but if it's for the team, what choice do I have? I hate this part of me.

Pitching goes smoothly, I think. We aren't going at it too long since Sozome has to get home and my shoulder feels like ripping out of its socket. "Hai-chan, do you mind showing me something?" Sozome's question is a little strange, so I pause as I pack up my gear.

"What is it?" My head tilts slightly.

"You've played third, right?" I nod my head, faintly remembering some sort of impact and a lot of cleats. "I keep trying to get the stuff that drops right at the fence, but I always stop a second away because I'm afraid of running into it." I raise my eyebrows slightly.

"Do you guys do the 'find the fence' stuff?" Sozome shakes her head, eyes slightly narrowed. "So basically, you're right handed, so it'll be easier. You'll use your right hand to find the fence while you concentrate on using your left to get the ball. I'll work on having the others help you out." Taking my glove out again, I go to third. "Throw one next to the fence. I'll show you."

The ball arcs prettily. With my left hand out, elbow bend slightly, I rush the fence. When my hand comes in contact, I keep going, using it as a buffer until I get the ball. "Like that. It looks like it's time for you to go, but I'll work on it with you tomorrow." The pitcher smiles widely.

"Great! Thanks, Hai-chan!" I wave as she goes off, repacking my gear and stuffing it in the shed where the other gear bags are. The groundskeeper will lock it up tonight when he waters the field. My only worry now, as I head back to the gym, is the shaking of my legs. It _hurts_ to walk. I can't get myself to walk fast, not even a little half-jog thing. This sort of physical weakness feels disgusting, like an ooze is filling my bones and dragging me down into the dirt so I never rise again.

"You're pushing yourself too hard." I'm just about ready to jump out of my skin, but the energy to do that isn't quite at hand yet. I glance back, eyes slightly narrowed as I see Susa catch up with me. "You're going to get injured, or burn out in the worst case scenario." I want to laugh at that. Does he not know I'm already aware of the risks I'm taking?

"Yeah. I know. I'll be more careful." My voice is raspy and grinding, wishing to stay in my throat rather than escape through my mouth. "Sorry."

"I'll carry you back." He's surprising, Susa. I never would've expected him of all people to offer carrying me. As much as I want to take him up on his offer, I don't want to admit defeat. I want to show my body it's a case of mind over matter. "You look like you're about to fall over."

We bicker back and forth, but it's clear I'm putting forth no effort and I'm carried back in a matter of minutes. It's embarrassing, to show up this way when all I did was catch a few softballs. What's more embarrassing, though, is falling asleep in those few minutes and waking up to a displeased Daiki and a warm hand on my forehead. "You idiot, Hai-chan! I keep telling you not to do this and you do it anyway!" Satsuki's voice fills the room. I have to sit up to realize I've been carried to a room I don't particularly recognize.

"Where are we?" I wish my sleepiness wasn't so obvious. It coats the room in strange shadows and turns the lights too bright.

"Susa took you to the trainer's room. You've been sleeping for the last fifteen minutes, and I wish you'd sleep longer!" The worry I hear is disheartening. "Maybe you should quit softball." My head snaps up faster than I thought humanly possible.

My face is blank, I think. Stiff as a board. Satsuki's is much more alive. Eyes wide, the pinkette has her hand clamped over her mouth like it'll take back what she just said. I'm being looked down on once more. It's not something I can accept. "H-Hai-chan-" The hand on mine is unwelcome, unwanted. It feels like I'm being burned.

It takes me a moment to remember who I am and what I do. It takes me a minute to understand everything I've heard. Then, looking at the pale pinkette with the most neutral expression my face can muster, I offer her a smile. All she does is turn white as a sheet; hand clamped over her mouth once more as I lock eyes with her. My mouth opens, and the words feel like they aren't mine. "Is that so?"

 


	42. Chapter Forty-Two

Satsuki and I haven't spoken in weeks, it feels. It's probably been much less, but I intend to keep it this way. As much as I know I should say something, anything, to the pinkette, my throat closes up and my mind goes black and my vision turns red whenever she comes into view. I know she's only trying to look out for me, that she has my best interests at heart, but what does she know? It was a mistake to trust her this much, a mistake to take up two sports again, and a mistake to think she'd understand. 

I'll be the first to admit my behavior is not anything to be proud of. My responses are short, blunt, and often not very helpful. I'm holding a grudge, it seems, and while I'd argue such an action is beneath me, it obviously isn't. 

"Hai-chan, I think-" I turn slightly to glance at Satsuki, to wonder what she'll try saying this time, but the pink-haired girl sighs and shakes her head. "Nevermind." So I don't. I'll pretend she didn't even say my name, and I'll go on with shooting hoops aimlessly. 

This whole ordeal is problematic for Daiki, I'm sure, but I'm not about to ask him to pick sides. Let him do what he wants. I'm burning bridges I should be keeping, but each time I see the pinkette all I can hear is her telling me to quit. I had enough of that at home. I had enough of that when I went to Teiko. I'm not about to let those words slide again, because it's not okay anymore. 

I'm tired of being underestimated, and tired of not being believed in, and sick and tired of always hurting and not getting anything out of it. I know who it is that I'm actually angry at, but I keep pushing the thought away, as if it won't surface again in the next five minutes. My next shot hits the rim and bounces back. 

The feel of the ball, rough and rubbery beneath my fingers, feels alien. I'm not focusing hard enough, and I keep letting myself become distracted.  _What a waste._ I think to myself, lips curling into a forlorn smile.  _What a waste of talent._ I retake the shot. 

I know we should be doing drills, that I should be joining them, but instead I'm acting childishly and practicing by myself. There's a practice match tomorrow where Daiki will fail to show and I will fail to act like myself. My heart thumps lazily. 

"Hai-chan, you should forgive Momoi already." Wakamatsu says as he sits on top of the strange stage-like structure. "She hasn't smiled all day." 

Some noise of acknowledgement pushes past my lips before I take another shot, trying to focus elsewhere. I know this isn't Satsuki's fault, and that I'm being selfish, but right now I'm not sure I can help it. "Oi, at least look at me when I'm talking!" Wakamatsu says, this time his voice growing a little louder. 

My mouth turns downward into a displeased scowl. "Please leave me alone, Wakamatsu." I say quietly, trying to keep my volitile temper in check. "I don't need a lecture right now." 

"I said look at me!" Wakamatsu suddenly yells, standing and walking a few steps toward me. I don't make my shot. It bounches off the rim and drops. "You're acting like a child! It's not fair to Momoi and it's not fair to us! She's just trying to look out for you and all you do is throw a tantrum!" I'm halfway to the ball, almost ready to pick it up, when I freeze. 

"I'm throwing a tantrum?" I ask icily, finishing the motion and walking back toward Wakamatsu. "I'm throwing a tantrum. That's so incredibly rude of me. I'm really just an American brat, right?" The blond backs up hastily, crashing into the stage. "That's right. I'm an American brat. Foreigners like me have no manners. What can I say? It must be the way I was raised." 

Wakamatsu's mouth opens and closes silently, as if he's trying to speak. "I guess you'd take it just fine if you were told to quit something you love, right? I'm sure you would. Unfortunately, I wasn't raised that way. Let me tell you a secret, Wakamatsu." I crouch down and shove the ball into his chest. "I don't need your lectures. Who do you think you are, my father? Please excuse this ill-mannered American. I've clearly not met your standards. Please submit them in writing and I will do my best to accommodate you." 

I know this anger is irrational. I know I should just calm the hell down and apologize to Satsuki and Wakamatsu and go home, but some unwanted sense of pride keeps my mouth sealed as I have some sort of staredown with the blond boy. His gaze doesn't waver, but mine does. "I'm sorry." I say quietly. 

"Wha-" Shock passes over his face as I stand, walking away. 

"Satsuki!" I call, turning to face the pink-haired girl. She looks at me in surprise for a few seconds. I bow deeply. "I'm sorry! I've mistreated you, and you've done nothing to deserve it." I hold the bow a few minutes, waiting in silence before standing upright. "I'm going home. I've been disruptive today." 

There's a strange silence as I make my way out of the gym. It isn't the stony sort, devoid of all emotion and coming to a swell of disapproval. It's just the slightest bit expectant, holding its breath as if waiting for something or someone to explode into dialogue and fill the ears of everyone around with soothing or violent words. 

Unfortunately, that air remains even after I've left. It's warm out, just warm enough to chase any remaining thoughts of going back inside as long as I can bask in the sunlight a little longer. Where can I go? I don't want to go home, not now. My apartment has felt tense and cold lately, and I have no intention of going back. 

Daiki will be pissed if I go and see Kagami in that strange, jealous way of his. Kuroko is likely still in club activities, and I don't have work. Ah, what can I do to fill the time? What can I do to avoid going home? I head for the roof of the gym, where Daiki likes to waste time and where I can't seem to catch my breath. 

It's chillier up here, something I should have accounted for when I left my belongings down below, but the fait warmth of the sun soaks into my dark clothing, and I'm tempted to stretch out across the floor. I give in to temptation, deciding that since I have a number of things to think over quite thoroughly, I might as well be comfortable while doing so. 

What's my first course of action? I've apologized, sincerely, but that doesn't mean that Satsuki will forgive me. To be honest, I wouldn't blame her for holding a grudge. She's too forgiving, and I hope that nobody will take advantage of that. I need to sort out my priorities. 

I think my biggest issue by far is how I've been handling two sports. Back in the States, this would never be an issue. Sports come in seasons, so why is it that here sports are all year-round in high school? It's not really a complaint, but more a curiosity. It's certainly making this much harder than it needs to be. 

I already know I shouldn't be playing basketball, especially on this team. How they even let me play boys' basketball, I'll never know. I figure it's better not to ask at all. I want to play. It's not an issue. My bigger, more serious question is "Should I?" Should I play basketball? Should I quit? I don't want to quit. I'd like to play as long as I possibly can. 

Quitting softball isn't an option in my mind, either. I want to play both. My grades haven't suffered yet, and my job is still going steady. What's left? Oh, right.  _Self-care._ At this rate, I'll barely make it through college, and in old age I'll be riddled by pain. That's something I can live with, I think. All this fun for some pain down the road? Doesn't it just balance out? I'll be fine, right? 

Regardless of old age and artheritis, I still need to look after myself  _now._  I shouldn't rely on Satsuki or Daiki or any of the others to keep myself in one piece. Maybe I'm being too reckless with my body. It's not in my nature to hold back, not when it comes to competition, but maybe I can attempt avoiding injuries more, for Satsuki's sake if not my own. 

It won't do me any good to take up training on my own at the moment. I'm cherishing all the sleep I'm getting and if I wake up any earlier I might just kill someone. I'll have to thank Hayashi for praticing with me in the mornings everyday. It must be a pain in the ass. 

What should I do? There's really no right answer to my knowledge, but there has to be a better one that I have now. I can't afford to quit my job, and like hell I'm gonna drop out of school. Maybe I should spend more time resting, or at least, taking preventative measures in the case of injury. I normally do a good job, at least, that's what I'd like to think, but there must be something better. There has to be a better way. 

Whether it's the fact that I'm starting to run on empty or the lazy warmth of the sun, I find myself drifting toward sleep. It's a slow process, filled with the sounds of soft footsteps, cheerful birds, and the low rumbling of passing cars. The heat of the sun coats me like a blanket, and I bask in it. It'll be especially cold soon, and I'm not looking forward to it. 

"Hai-chan..." I can hear Satsuki's voice whispering quietly, "Hai-chan, you need to come back into the gym, okay? It's important." I open on eye slowly, watching the pink-haired girl come into focus and drift out just as slowly. 

"Just five more minutes, Satsuki. It's so nice up here." For a few moments, I hear nothing. Then a deep sigh pushes past her lips. 

"Hai-chan, there's someone here that you should really... I think you'd need to see it to believe me." I open my eyes at the quiet notes of desperation that start to coat her voice. Satsuki never sounds like this, quiet and resigned, maybe even tense. "It's important, I promise." 

"O-Okay." I follow her down the ladder, toward the gym once more. Knots of dread are filling my stomach and tightening their grip around my throat like a noose. My palms are starting to sweat, and I think my voice might crack if I attempt speech. 

"Please don't get mad, Hai-chan. I didn't mean to let him in. He just barged in and I couldn't stop him-" Satsuki's eyes are pleading with me, and my stomach drops into my shoes.

"Who is it?" I ask so quietly Satsuki has to have me repeat the question. 

"A-About that..." She opens the door instead of answering, and I'm greeted with a sight I wish I could've avoided.

If I had to describe my brother, I'd have to say he looks like me, but taller. His shoulders have broadened, and he's definitely filled out. His eyes have gotten more intense, less joyful and more calculating. 

" _So you finally came, Alex. Did you miss me?"_ He asks, blue eyes going cold. I swallow thickly. " _What, aren't you excited to see me after all this time? Or were you having too much fun to think about the rest of us?"_

"Alex, who is that?" Imayoshi asks, his eyes widening slightly as my hands turn to fists. 

" _Of course I missed you. At first, at least. I heard you've been here quite frequently, Derek. It's a shame you didn't drop by earlier."_ I reply as calmly as I can. " _But that can't be helped."_

 _"You're still the same sort of person."_ Derek says with that stupid grin of this that practically announces what he thinks of me.  _"The kind that gets pushed around."_

"Imayoshi, this is my brother, Derek." I say after a few heartbeats. "I'm sorry he's causing so much trouble. I didn't know he'd come here." 

" _Are you ignoring me, Alex?"_ The grin is dropped so fast I almost miss the action.  _"It took a lot of time to find my way here, you know."_

 _"What do you want? There's no way you'd be here if it didn't benefit you."_ My eyes narrow slightly. 

 _"I'm here to invite you to the funeral, not that you'll be allowed to attend. Got to keep up appearances, you know."_ As my eyes widen, Derek's grin gets wider and wider, like some sort of twisted imitation of the Cheshire cat. " _It's a shame you can't go, of course. Dad would've been so disappointed his oldest daughter couldn't spare the time to see him one last time."_

My body has gone stiff and straight, and I can feel all the blood in my face draining away. "What?" My heart is beating faster and faster, and my chest feels so tight I can hardly breathe. " _What do you mean, funeral? What's going on, Derek?"_

 _"Didn't you know?"_ The way he feigns innocence chokes me. " _Oh, that's right. Nobody told you, huh? That's okay, since you aren't his daughter anymore anyway."_ I have to tear my gaze away as my vision blurs. Weakness here will be used against me. 

The room is silent. The lack of noise is suffocating, and I can hardly dare to break it. " _What was the purpose of you coming here?"_ I ask after a few minutes.  _"What do you want from me?"_ Derek says nothing for a few minutes, walking toward the Touou starters. There's a tension that fills the air, suffocating everyone, as he looks at them all quietly before his eyes land on the newly arrived Daiki. 

" _Blue hair? How unusual."_ Derek muses, walking toward him.  _"I wonder if it's real..."_

 _"Don't ignore me!"_  I shout, stepping toward him briskly. _"You have no right to be here!"_

For a moment, he actually stops. For a minute, he turns to me slowly, with a disgusting grin stretching from ear to ear. For a second, the tingles racing down my spine intensify. Then, faster than I can react, I find myself on the floor with my cheek stinging. 

The tension snaps just like that, with a surge of movement before I get up and dust myself off. "Is that how you want to play this?" I ask, ignoring the confusion that begins to stretch across Derek's face. Hesitation drains from my body. "Is this the type of person she made you?" 

The tension is returning. I crack my knuckles slowly, trying to drag back my calm. Then I look Derek in the face once more. " _What a disappointment you've turned out to be. Mom must be so proud of you."_

The faint glimmer of triumph in Derek's eyes dies as I step forward. For each step I take, he takes one back. " _How could you stay here?"_ He asks. " _After all the things Japan has done to the US. After World War I."_ I grit my teeth. 

 _"Get your facts straight before you try lecturing me. World War I has nothing to do with me! It has nothing to do with anyone in this room! It's in the past, and holding the mistakes of former governments against the present people of those countries is disgusting!"_ My voice is rising. 

"Hai, what is going on?" Imayoshi asks, starting to step closer.

"Please stay where you are." I say flatly. "This has nothing to do with you. I will take care of it. Leave if you'd like. I'm sorry for the interruption." 

Things start when a fist crashs into my jaw. I dance out of the way as Derek stumbles clumsily toward me, still swinging recklessly. I have to duck under a long, over-extended arm to hook my ankle around his and send him crashing into the floor. He always was one for losing his temper, but the violence is new. 

He gets up quickly, scrabbling for purchase on the waxy floor and lunging for me again. I dodge again. If I can remain out of reach and tire him out, then Derek will leave. He doesn't have any persistence, and it's what's frequently caused him to fail. Derek will abandon anything he doesn't have talent for or success in immediately. I'm just glad that isn't a trait I picked up. 

" _You little-"_

 _"You have no respect for anyone, Derek. That's why you aren't going to get very far."_ If I can tire him out a little faster, it would be best. He lunges a few more times before I see his eyes grow calm. Ah, yes. On occasion, Derek can actually accomplish things with his own two hands. I guess I've really pissed him off this time. 

His fist barely grazes my cheekbone as I dart out of reach. I'm not sure how to end this, but it needs to be soon.  _"Dad's dead, ya know."_ He says calmly, loosening his limbs. " _He'd be disappointed in you, I think. He didn't even get to see you one last time. Mom was right about you. You're selfish. You only do what's right for you and abandon the rest of us."_

My eyes go wide again. He's got to be lying, right? What he said earlier, and this, all of this is a big hoax, right? I don't want to believe it. " _That's right, Alex. I think Dad died of a broken heart, all because his little girl wouldn't come home."_ My body is heavy, and I forget to dodge. 

Then, for a moment, everything comes crystal clear. My fist smashes into his face, a solid crunch sounding beneath my knuckles as Derek staggers back, screaming as his hands rush to his face. I take another step, my arm pulls back and flies forward, and he topples backward as unexpected force collides with his jaw. 

 _"Don't talk to me about Dad. Don't talk to me about broken hearts. You will leave here, and you will not come back. Do you understand me, Derek?"_ The blue-eyed boy glares at me from behind tears, blood dripping from behind his fingers. " _If you don't, I'll teach you myself. Don't talk to me again."_

I watch blankly as he stumbles to his feet, spewing swears left and right, before racing out of the gym. "Hai-chan, what... what just happened?" Satsuki asks, coming closer. I try to think of something to say, something to explain this event, but nothing will come to mind. 

"I... I punched him." I say with confusion. "He said things I didn't want to hear..." 

Satsuki looks just as confused as I feel, and every time I try to open my mouth to try and make sense of things, nothing will come out. "What did he say, Hai-chan?" Satsuki asks softly as she steps toward me. 

 _I think Dad died of a broken heart, all because his little girl wouldn't come home._ My body tenses, my eyes widen slightly, and my lip quivers. "I'm going home." I say quietly. "I'm going to go home." 

With that, I walk out and pretend I can't hear Satsuki yelling behind me, and when I hear footsteps, I take off like my life depends on it. 


End file.
